Moms and Mums Club 2013 Part 7
Member
Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: Louisiana
Posts: 167
It's always there ... Isn't it?? This stupid disease lurking around me all the time just waiting for me to let my guard down.. One week now and I feel completely normal now and have had a productive and enjoyable day but while flipping thru Facebook saw one of my favorite pics from a great summer day with family and friends on a friends yacht ... About 5 years ago before my drinking was really a problem.. And I gotta admit it made me sad and sorta pissed off!!! Thoughts running thru my head that I will never have another cold beer or glass of wine on a warm summer day and enjoy a good buzz and laughs and feeling like I will always be the "outcast" with everyone watching their drinking around me.... Ugh!!!!... Talked to my sponsor this morning and I know how to play the tape all the way thru and I know it is my disease trying to trick me into thinking that its not that big of a deal and could maybe one day drink again... I came on here right now just to write this and get it off my chest and outta my brain!!!! I will pray and meditate for a bit before my kids get home from school and will instead try to focus on how wonderful I feel today vs a week ago when I was sick as a dog with my alcoholism... Thanks for listening ladies! Prayers for all for continued sobriety and peace!!
Member
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Pennsylvania
Posts: 3,313
Originally Posted by sissy4444 
And I gotta admit it made me sad and sorta pissed off!!! Thoughts running thru my head that I will never have another cold beer or glass of wine on a warm summer day and enjoy a good buzz and laughs and feeling like I will always be the "outcast" with everyone watching their drinking around me.... Ugh!!!!...
Member
Join Date: May 2013
Posts: 1,219
Things that help keep me from drinking: 1) I read here every day and seeing newcomers posts help remind me how bad it gets for us. 2) remember my sleepless nights worrying about leaving my daughter motherless 3) remembering looking in the mirror for signs of yellow eyes, then looking away from the mirror because the woman staring back repulsed me! 4) recalling the financial strain I put my family in because so much money went to booze.
So although there are fleeting moments I am envious of those that can "enjoy" alcohol, I remember that sober I can actually "enjoy LIFE"! That means so much more to me!!
Hope all you ladies are good:-)
So although there are fleeting moments I am envious of those that can "enjoy" alcohol, I remember that sober I can actually "enjoy LIFE"! That means so much more to me!!
Hope all you ladies are good:-)
Member
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Nazareth, PA
Posts: 453
Long, bumpy day.... girls are semi-sick, and I feel like I'm getting it too. When will this winter ever end??
I mostly play mental games when AV is acting up. I painfully remember the last night I drank, and all the stupid, stupid things I did while drunk. I remember the way I focused on that first drink of the day more than I focused on almost anything else, and all that pain reminds me of how awful it was and it scares me into never wanting it all to come back, which I know would be the inevitable path after just one drink.
I mostly play mental games when AV is acting up. I painfully remember the last night I drank, and all the stupid, stupid things I did while drunk. I remember the way I focused on that first drink of the day more than I focused on almost anything else, and all that pain reminds me of how awful it was and it scares me into never wanting it all to come back, which I know would be the inevitable path after just one drink.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: Louisiana
Posts: 167
Trying to not feel sorry for myself tonight... Am certain I will cringe If I watch The Bachelor tonight cuz of all the wine drinking... I cringe enough watching it anyway just based on the stupidity of these young woman... Lol.... I watch cuz it's a "thing" with my daughter and I and I enjoy watching her learn what not to do around boys .... Anyway... Already almost 7pm here and dinner is done and the kids are getting showered and once I do the dishes and make lunches for tomorrow I can relax and the evening will be mine... Right now I am staying focused on how great I will in the morning and having yet another sober day behind me.... Made a hair appt and have decided to get one of those darling short hair styles everyone is getting now ... Like Jennifer Lawrence has... Wanna make a big change for my new improved lifestyle ... Hope everyone has a safe and healthy wonderful night!!! Prayers for everyone
Member
Join Date: Jan 2014
Location: South Alabama
Posts: 40
Hey Moms! Nearly bedtime for me, and I just wanted to say I am incredibly irritable the past few days. Anyone else? PMS maybe, lack of an outlet for frustration, or I'm surrounded by idiots! All fit, could just be a combo, but either way, I need it to stop now please. And thanks. 
Member
Join Date: May 2013
Posts: 699
Hey everyone - just catching up and about to take the kids to childcare - it's still raining / flooding here and yesterday was extremely stressful - we went into London to try and get visas sorted - it took us forever but hopefully that's us done now - just have to go back to pick them up.
Hey sissy - when are you going for the chop? I did the whole gwenyth Paltrow sliding doors chop years ago - it's quite liberating so good for you
let us know how you get on?
Hey ladybug how are you holding up? And newstar I think you're doing an amazing job
Anyways - must dash - catch you all later - day 21 for me today xx
Hey sissy - when are you going for the chop? I did the whole gwenyth Paltrow sliding doors chop years ago - it's quite liberating so good for you
let us know how you get on?Hey ladybug how are you holding up? And newstar I think you're doing an amazing job
Anyways - must dash - catch you all later - day 21 for me today xx
Member
Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: Louisiana
Posts: 167
Sarah... I had the sliding doors cut as well about 7 years ago but have obviously grown it out..it is liberating and I am super excited to be short and sassy again!!
I was very cranky yesterday and a bit snappy with my kids... I really need to get to a meeting soon!!..yet again upon waking I am soooooo happy to be alive and well and sober! I CLING to this feeling and am truly thrilled to be moving in the right direction with God's help and the support of others just like me!
I was very cranky yesterday and a bit snappy with my kids... I really need to get to a meeting soon!!..yet again upon waking I am soooooo happy to be alive and well and sober! I CLING to this feeling and am truly thrilled to be moving in the right direction with God's help and the support of others just like me!
Member
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Pennsylvania
Posts: 3,313
Hi Moms,
Day 3 and feeling much better than Day 3 of my last binge. I think it is because I didn't let this last drink turn into a binge and I feel very hopeful that this time around is going to stick. I can't predict when my AV will show up, but I do know that when it does I am going to reach out to hubby AND you all for support.
It is 5 degrees this morning and they are predicting a huge snowstorm for Thursday (8-12 inches where we are).
Hopefully, it will be the last of the season. Swim class for my daughter this morning, then quick visit to the in-laws (ugh), then babysitting my nephew for a couple of hours so busy day planned ahead.
Hope you are all doing well and feeling good about yourselves Will check back later.
Day 3 and feeling much better than Day 3 of my last binge. I think it is because I didn't let this last drink turn into a binge and I feel very hopeful that this time around is going to stick. I can't predict when my AV will show up, but I do know that when it does I am going to reach out to hubby AND you all for support.
It is 5 degrees this morning and they are predicting a huge snowstorm for Thursday (8-12 inches where we are).
Hopefully, it will be the last of the season. Swim class for my daughter this morning, then quick visit to the in-laws (ugh), then babysitting my nephew for a couple of hours so busy day planned ahead. Hope you are all doing well and feeling good about yourselves
Will check back later.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2013
Posts: 1,074
Good morning ladies! I hope everyone is doing well today! It sounds like some of you had kind of a rough day yesterday. I was feeling a little melancholy yesterday as well. It has been so dreary here lately. I pretty much gave up on trying to photograph anything outdoors, but I did get my new camera in the mail! My hubby loves it after all that lol. I can't wait until it's a little nicer outside so I can take some more pictures. Until then I need to read the manual anyway.
So, I've started looking into this SMART recovery program. I'm really excited about it. It uses more evidence and science based practices for recovery. I love AA, but I have a difficult time with some of the faith stuff to be honest. This other program says that you can continue to use AA, and use this in conjunction. It doesn't require you to have a sponsor or go to meetings every day either. However, there are online meetings. Maybe between AA, SR, and SMART I'll finally be able to stay sober! lol
Anyway, baby is yelling at me. I'll be checking in throughout the day. Take care!
So, I've started looking into this SMART recovery program. I'm really excited about it. It uses more evidence and science based practices for recovery. I love AA, but I have a difficult time with some of the faith stuff to be honest. This other program says that you can continue to use AA, and use this in conjunction. It doesn't require you to have a sponsor or go to meetings every day either. However, there are online meetings. Maybe between AA, SR, and SMART I'll finally be able to stay sober! lol
Anyway, baby is yelling at me. I'll be checking in throughout the day. Take care!
Member
Join Date: May 2013
Location: Austin, TX
Posts: 369
Good Morning Moms -
Two hour weather delay in Texas. I swear I've had more weather troubles in Texas than I ever did in my 10 years on the east coast. Geez! It's just cold, let's move on!
How is everyone today?
I saw one of my friends last night that was present at last weeks all out binge fest - I drank all day and went to a friends house for 'girls wine night' well, I'm sure it was fun if I hadn't already been 2 bottles of wine deep. She's not a drinker her version of going out is 2 glasses of wine (this was her max last weekend while in New Orleans!) We share our trainer and last night was the first time I saw her. She didn't say anything but referenced the conversations we had that night of which I have no recollection (and proceeded to drive myself home - Gross! I cannot even think about it). It was another step in putting that gross day behind me.
I know we think ab lot about how we can't drink anymore and that's hard but perhaps we think about those around us in our lives who don't drink? People who are pretty unaffected by not drinking. Wouldn't it be better to reframe the way we look at this? I had told my friends the other night that the 'girls wine night' was my last and I was back on my 'health kick' She asked about it last night:
"How's the no drinking thing?"
"It's fine. I haven't drank and when I want to, I just think about all those empty calories."
"I know. I'd rather have a brownie. That's so good. You know I don't drink much but I think you're right, its time to just cut it out all together. But I wouldn't mind going out for brownies after work."
The brief interaction just took the pressure out of the whole situation... just easy. Anyway, I share it because its such a big deal to us but perhaps other people (those that don't obsess) don't think anything of the face that we don't drink...
Off to catch the monkey... she's just walked out of the bathroom with my new Laura Mercier makeup bags dripping with water - I know that's toilet water.... Great.
Two hour weather delay in Texas. I swear I've had more weather troubles in Texas than I ever did in my 10 years on the east coast. Geez! It's just cold, let's move on!
How is everyone today?
I saw one of my friends last night that was present at last weeks all out binge fest - I drank all day and went to a friends house for 'girls wine night' well, I'm sure it was fun if I hadn't already been 2 bottles of wine deep. She's not a drinker her version of going out is 2 glasses of wine (this was her max last weekend while in New Orleans!) We share our trainer and last night was the first time I saw her. She didn't say anything but referenced the conversations we had that night of which I have no recollection (and proceeded to drive myself home - Gross! I cannot even think about it). It was another step in putting that gross day behind me.
I know we think ab lot about how we can't drink anymore and that's hard but perhaps we think about those around us in our lives who don't drink? People who are pretty unaffected by not drinking. Wouldn't it be better to reframe the way we look at this? I had told my friends the other night that the 'girls wine night' was my last and I was back on my 'health kick' She asked about it last night:
"How's the no drinking thing?"
"It's fine. I haven't drank and when I want to, I just think about all those empty calories."
"I know. I'd rather have a brownie. That's so good. You know I don't drink much but I think you're right, its time to just cut it out all together. But I wouldn't mind going out for brownies after work."
The brief interaction just took the pressure out of the whole situation... just easy. Anyway, I share it because its such a big deal to us but perhaps other people (those that don't obsess) don't think anything of the face that we don't drink...
Off to catch the monkey... she's just walked out of the bathroom with my new Laura Mercier makeup bags dripping with water - I know that's toilet water.... Great.
Member
Join Date: May 2013
Posts: 699
Oh dear Babs - that stuffs not cheap either - hope you could salvage it 
- I found my little boy blushing our dog with my new blusher brush - I could have killed him as it was a new 'nice' one too - bloody kids cost a fortune
- I found my little boy blushing our dog with my new blusher brush - I could have killed him as it was a new 'nice' one too - bloody kids cost a fortune
Member
Join Date: May 2013
Location: Austin, TX
Posts: 369
Hahaha! Thankfully there was nothing in the bags. I treated my myself to some new make-up over the weekend and they were the bags that the girl gave me for free... I do not get the obsession with the toilet...
She's 8 months old and just into everything. She's got this moxie that I just marvel at. She's a real addition to our kitchen dance parties, she's finding her soul for sure. She gave me a little booty shaking this morning, soggy make-up bags in hand. SOrt of glad I had a late start to work. Nice quality time.
At the office now with a huge writing project that is playing a serious second fiddle to ANYTHING else....
She's 8 months old and just into everything. She's got this moxie that I just marvel at. She's a real addition to our kitchen dance parties, she's finding her soul for sure.
She gave me a little booty shaking this morning, soggy make-up bags in hand. SOrt of glad I had a late start to work. Nice quality time. At the office now with a huge writing project that is playing a serious second fiddle to ANYTHING else....
Member
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: california
Posts: 118
Good morning ladies!
Have been busy the past few days and so haven't posted since Saturday.
Babs, good luck on getting through your busy week and your 1/2 marathon. That is awesome. Make sure you come on SR tonight when you are in your hotel room and alone. Don't order wine to the room. It isn't bad at all that you are looking forward to some down time alone without your daughter and husband. We ALL need a break. In fact, when we don't give ourselves enough of a break that is when we "break" and slip right? The stress of it all...a glass of vino to help us relax. Your experience after your run is I believe what they refer to when they say you get a "runners high". It is euphoric almost, and your adreline is kicking in full on. So, you must have had one of those episodes. I used to run a lot too and remember having a few of those. You feel like you could walk on clouds. Whatever it was, I am glad you had the experience. Every bit counts.
Zelda, I like your idea of sharing what works for you. My list exactly 1) write down all the terrible/horrible things alcohol has done to you, your family and remember them 2) be honest with yourself and others always, don't hide 3) take a picture of yourself, or post a picture of yourself in one of your drunken stoopers on the fridge to remind yourself everyday what you DO NOT want to look like, or act like anymore 4) grab a book of inspirational sayings or poems and read one a day 5) let others know (or pick a select few) that you can reach out to in the moments of weakness and 6) above all, do NOT pick up that glass. If you feel like you need to call your hubby in or your friend and ask that person to pour it down the drain.
Freethinking, good for you for reaching out before resorting to the drink. That is what we are all here for, to talk you down the ledge and to support. There are no judgments here only care, support and concern.
Happy Tuesday everyone. I feel great. I made it through the entire weekend with no alcohol. That is a first for me.
Have been busy the past few days and so haven't posted since Saturday.
Babs, good luck on getting through your busy week and your 1/2 marathon. That is awesome. Make sure you come on SR tonight when you are in your hotel room and alone. Don't order wine to the room. It isn't bad at all that you are looking forward to some down time alone without your daughter and husband. We ALL need a break. In fact, when we don't give ourselves enough of a break that is when we "break" and slip right? The stress of it all...a glass of vino to help us relax. Your experience after your run is I believe what they refer to when they say you get a "runners high". It is euphoric almost, and your adreline is kicking in full on. So, you must have had one of those episodes. I used to run a lot too and remember having a few of those. You feel like you could walk on clouds. Whatever it was, I am glad you had the experience. Every bit counts.
Zelda, I like your idea of sharing what works for you. My list exactly 1) write down all the terrible/horrible things alcohol has done to you, your family and remember them 2) be honest with yourself and others always, don't hide 3) take a picture of yourself, or post a picture of yourself in one of your drunken stoopers on the fridge to remind yourself everyday what you DO NOT want to look like, or act like anymore 4) grab a book of inspirational sayings or poems and read one a day 5) let others know (or pick a select few) that you can reach out to in the moments of weakness and 6) above all, do NOT pick up that glass. If you feel like you need to call your hubby in or your friend and ask that person to pour it down the drain.
Freethinking, good for you for reaching out before resorting to the drink. That is what we are all here for, to talk you down the ledge and to support. There are no judgments here only care, support and concern.
Happy Tuesday everyone. I feel great. I made it through the entire weekend with no alcohol. That is a first for me.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: california
Posts: 118
Yes, today will complete my 5th day.......I am feeling very anxious and jittery. I hate this feeling. I think I need to go for a good run tonight or yoga so that I can get all this nervous energy out of my system.....
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
