Class of January 2014 Part3
Member
Join Date: Jan 2014
Location: Australia
Posts: 643
Welcome Withope and Gimliman. Everyone is going to bed over there and here it is lunchtime!
I went out this morning with a girlfriend and just had coffee, wandered around the shops, laughed and I just felt different then when I was drinking. Just a lighter feeling about me. I told her that I had quit drinking and she has seen me hit it hard as she used to as well, but she has had heart issues and has to stop at two glasses now. I don't think she realises my drinking is a problem and probably thought it was just me wanting to get fit and healthy and shed a few pounds, but that is okay. I don't have to shout it from the rooftops just now when I meet with her I will be more comfortable.
Do you guys associate some friends with drinking too?
I went out this morning with a girlfriend and just had coffee, wandered around the shops, laughed and I just felt different then when I was drinking. Just a lighter feeling about me. I told her that I had quit drinking and she has seen me hit it hard as she used to as well, but she has had heart issues and has to stop at two glasses now. I don't think she realises my drinking is a problem and probably thought it was just me wanting to get fit and healthy and shed a few pounds, but that is okay. I don't have to shout it from the rooftops just now when I meet with her I will be more comfortable.
Do you guys associate some friends with drinking too?
Member
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: Wisconsin
Posts: 539
I am NOT looking forward to bed! No no no!!
Haven't heard that about Kava tea? Yikes! Will be sure to mention that to my doc if I get medication which I hope I do, because I do not like this feeling right now.
I am anticipating lying in bed getting comfy, then jerking awake from an awful dream/vision than feeling my pulse race from it, than feeling a panic attack coming cuz I think its a problem with my heart. UGH
Makes me want to stay awake all night.
Haven't heard that about Kava tea? Yikes! Will be sure to mention that to my doc if I get medication which I hope I do, because I do not like this feeling right now.
I am anticipating lying in bed getting comfy, then jerking awake from an awful dream/vision than feeling my pulse race from it, than feeling a panic attack coming cuz I think its a problem with my heart. UGH
Makes me want to stay awake all night.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2014
Location: US
Posts: 556
Welcome Withope and gimliman!
End of day 11. Tough one. Up until 1am prepping for work, then back up for the day at 5:30. Second time this week I did this to myself. I'm so tired my face hurts. Came home early and helped my 10 year old make dinner, which means I made it in such a way that it seemed like she was making it. Requires twice the work and twice the patience. I can't believe I made it out alive!
I really need this work week to be done. Balance is a big problem for me. I desperately need to recharge. I think this is such a drinking trigger because I have a terrible tendency of running myself into the ground, putting myself last, that it is too easy to pick up a drink again.
I am not planning on that and I'm still so grateful for each sober day. I want this time to be different. This has been my worst withdrawal yet and I can't imagine what the next one would look like.
Keep going everyone.
End of day 11. Tough one. Up until 1am prepping for work, then back up for the day at 5:30. Second time this week I did this to myself. I'm so tired my face hurts. Came home early and helped my 10 year old make dinner, which means I made it in such a way that it seemed like she was making it. Requires twice the work and twice the patience. I can't believe I made it out alive!
I really need this work week to be done. Balance is a big problem for me. I desperately need to recharge. I think this is such a drinking trigger because I have a terrible tendency of running myself into the ground, putting myself last, that it is too easy to pick up a drink again.
I am not planning on that and I'm still so grateful for each sober day. I want this time to be different. This has been my worst withdrawal yet and I can't imagine what the next one would look like.
Keep going everyone.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 10,912
What sorts of activities do you tend to enjoy in the evenings, Arctic? I like reading books... watching movies or interesting music videos (not overly stimulating ones, though). Also like taking long walks in my city and coming home only around 11 pm so that I'm exhausted... Am trying to learn cooking more...
For panic attacks at night (I'm prone to these, too), one thing that tends to help me is having a little snack, NOT sugary(!) but more a handful of mixed nuts, or a cup of milk or herbal tea (chamomille or balm mint). I also like meditation.
It'll get better, just hang in there!
For panic attacks at night (I'm prone to these, too), one thing that tends to help me is having a little snack, NOT sugary(!) but more a handful of mixed nuts, or a cup of milk or herbal tea (chamomille or balm mint). I also like meditation.
It'll get better, just hang in there!
Member
Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: California
Posts: 2,643
I'm hear you, Adee. My work load just keeps getting heavier. How I wish today was Friday. One more day, we can do this! I am looking forward to sleeping in Saturday, I so need to catch up on sleep.
Ending day 15 here, doing really well on bypassing cravings, I just wish my energy levels were higher. Don't say it, I already know....exercise will help. Yep, I will do that, not tonight though; too tired!
Ending day 15 here, doing really well on bypassing cravings, I just wish my energy levels were higher. Don't say it, I already know....exercise will help. Yep, I will do that, not tonight though; too tired!
Member
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: Wisconsin
Posts: 539
OH I would love a walk but I live in the deep Northwoods but it is pitch black out and there are wolves! 
I will try a snack, that and just keep repeating to myself "this will pass, this will pass, this will pass"
I will try a snack, that and just keep repeating to myself "this will pass, this will pass, this will pass"
Member
Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 10,912
Do you know the book "Dune" by Frank Herbert (or the movie made from it)? He had this "litany against fear" in it. I like it a lot.
“I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain.”
― Frank Herbert, Dune
“I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain.”
― Frank Herbert, Dune
Member
Join Date: Jan 2014
Location: Australia
Posts: 643
Hi guys, just found these words I had written last year after a particularly big bender. I wanted to keep it so I didn't forget how I felt when I was at the depths of despair, to remind myself of how horrible it feels. I thought if I shared it might help someone, who knows. I am bearing my soul here . . .
"New depths of despair. Who knew they went so low? I am drinking even more than when I first cried for help. I am self destructing, self sabotaging, I see the pattern so why don't I stop? What will it take?
I know what this is doing to me physically - I type about it every day. I feel it destroying me.
I can find no joy in life. I told my husband I am so unhappy, not with him, but with everything else. I can't get excited about anything. I can't find anything to look forward to. I don't care about myself, my appearance. I have put on so much weight and I used to care but now I don't care. I don't exercise. I am turning into what I don't like about my mother, lazy, excuse making.
What do I have to lose to make me wake up? Why can't I feel anything? I am detached but don't know how to reattach. I want to feel the way I used to feel. Help. I am so ashamed. I just want to run away and hide somewhere."
"New depths of despair. Who knew they went so low? I am drinking even more than when I first cried for help. I am self destructing, self sabotaging, I see the pattern so why don't I stop? What will it take?
I know what this is doing to me physically - I type about it every day. I feel it destroying me.
I can find no joy in life. I told my husband I am so unhappy, not with him, but with everything else. I can't get excited about anything. I can't find anything to look forward to. I don't care about myself, my appearance. I have put on so much weight and I used to care but now I don't care. I don't exercise. I am turning into what I don't like about my mother, lazy, excuse making.
What do I have to lose to make me wake up? Why can't I feel anything? I am detached but don't know how to reattach. I want to feel the way I used to feel. Help. I am so ashamed. I just want to run away and hide somewhere."
Member
Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: California
Posts: 2,643
A warm welcome to our newest class members. Today's roster for January 2014 follows:
1 2bstrong
2 Adee
3 ApisPadre
4 Arjip
5 ArticSA
6 Autan
7 Avra
8 Binge1989
9 Blondsober
10 BradJustBrad
11 Branches
12 Briar
13 Butterfly33
14 Cairns87
15 Cara39
16 Carlygirl
17 Cheeky1
18 Chefhunter
19 ClydeChief
20 ColoradoMan
21 Countingdays
22 Dan Dare
23 Dbskid
24 Desertsweetpea
25 Dirk626
26 Django
27 Dj72075
28 Dorris
29 EagerforChange
30 Ed2715
31 Eldy
32 Emkay
33 Finnie
34 Fleuryp
35 Forabetterlife
36 ForestRunner
37 Free2Bsober13
38 FreddyBear
39 Frugal14
40 Gatorgirl67
41 Gimliman
42 Goldcoastgirl
43 Grahammt21312
44 GreenEggsAndHam
45 Grindilow
46 Grocerease
47 GypsyHeart
48 Haennie
49 Halfvictory
50 Imabuleva
51 Ineedhelp123
52 IreLander
53 Jazzfish
54 Jeff1962
55 Jenn80
56 Johnny555
57 Jojoreese
58 Kakanola
59 Kat60
60 kcbf
61 Ky2Beijing
62 Lifeplant
63 Liss74
64 Littlelma
65 Lulu212
66 Marcellina
67 MariahGayle
68 Marius76
69 Martina12
70 Medion
71 MetalMatt
72 Muhv
73 Mulligan72
74 Mvngon
75 New Star
76 Noexcuse
77 Ntzomb
78 Odelle
79 Paralysedforce
80 Pataphor
81 PaulinaPolitely
82 Peacehappyness
83 Peeka
84 Pinktinkfairy
85 PinkShooter
86 Pmaub
87 Resilient
88 Robert777
89 Ronjohn
90 Rose1234
91 RunnerBean
92 Sazzle
93 Scampered
94 Scaredofchange
95 Shellflower
96 SHG13
97 SilentCinemaFan
98 Sinderos
99 Snaggle
100 SoberChristmas
101 Soberella66
102 SoberMM
103 Swaps
104 Tang
105 Tempe
106 TrickyDave
107 TheAceFace
108 Thefist
109 TTBABP
110 Withope
111 Ynmamflm
Good night from California!
1 2bstrong
2 Adee
3 ApisPadre
4 Arjip
5 ArticSA
6 Autan
7 Avra
8 Binge1989
9 Blondsober
10 BradJustBrad
11 Branches
12 Briar
13 Butterfly33
14 Cairns87
15 Cara39
16 Carlygirl
17 Cheeky1
18 Chefhunter
19 ClydeChief
20 ColoradoMan
21 Countingdays
22 Dan Dare
23 Dbskid
24 Desertsweetpea
25 Dirk626
26 Django
27 Dj72075
28 Dorris
29 EagerforChange
30 Ed2715
31 Eldy
32 Emkay
33 Finnie
34 Fleuryp
35 Forabetterlife
36 ForestRunner
37 Free2Bsober13
38 FreddyBear
39 Frugal14
40 Gatorgirl67
41 Gimliman
42 Goldcoastgirl
43 Grahammt21312
44 GreenEggsAndHam
45 Grindilow
46 Grocerease
47 GypsyHeart
48 Haennie
49 Halfvictory
50 Imabuleva
51 Ineedhelp123
52 IreLander
53 Jazzfish
54 Jeff1962
55 Jenn80
56 Johnny555
57 Jojoreese
58 Kakanola
59 Kat60
60 kcbf
61 Ky2Beijing
62 Lifeplant
63 Liss74
64 Littlelma
65 Lulu212
66 Marcellina
67 MariahGayle
68 Marius76
69 Martina12
70 Medion
71 MetalMatt
72 Muhv
73 Mulligan72
74 Mvngon
75 New Star
76 Noexcuse
77 Ntzomb
78 Odelle
79 Paralysedforce
80 Pataphor
81 PaulinaPolitely
82 Peacehappyness
83 Peeka
84 Pinktinkfairy
85 PinkShooter
86 Pmaub
87 Resilient
88 Robert777
89 Ronjohn
90 Rose1234
91 RunnerBean
92 Sazzle
93 Scampered
94 Scaredofchange
95 Shellflower
96 SHG13
97 SilentCinemaFan
98 Sinderos
99 Snaggle
100 SoberChristmas
101 Soberella66
102 SoberMM
103 Swaps
104 Tang
105 Tempe
106 TrickyDave
107 TheAceFace
108 Thefist
109 TTBABP
110 Withope
111 Ynmamflm
Good night from California!
OX
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Upper Left USA
Posts: 630
I am joining too! Was a quiet member of may 13 and now I'm going here. Had a good 8 months or so sober in a row with almost ten total months of 2013 sober. Been a rough past three weeks though! I'm on my second night sober and will feel better tomorrow! Haven't done much these last two days of recovery but look here at SR and watch movies.
I am done with boozn! I think the DW is too so it should be good. Looking forward to getting to know the 1 14ers. Best of luck to us all.
I am done with boozn! I think the DW is too so it should be good. Looking forward to getting to know the 1 14ers. Best of luck to us all.
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