Br00ksie

So being that I feel the way I do, there is no way I'm going outside to a meeting. I called an AA person and she recommended this Craig Ferguson video as a quasi-qualification. It was just what I needed! I wanted to share it with you guys.

It's about 12 mins long, really funny and inspiring.

Craig Ferguson Speaks From The Heart - YouTube

LillianGish

Jello is such a weird "food." I never understood why hospitals insist on Jello. Here, I learned something today and had to share:

Renarde

Ok folks, just finished studying for one exam. Now onto the next one. Husband is being an angel and picking up the baby. I could potentially stay here until midnight. I'm in a big isolation room basically - no speaking allowed, no smelly foods, etc. It is my dream room in the library - just discovered it. I think I will head to Panera soon to get some food to bring back here, and then stay until I can't stand it anymore.

If I get two A- grades, my GPA will drop to a 3.91. If I get only one A-, I will have a 3.98. It's likely I will get one because I forgot about part of an assignment and missed some points a few weeks ago. Meh.

Dee74

My GPA's not perfect either

Although, as I said, it was very important to me at the time, 15 years on, I'm more impressed about what I learned, than my GPA Renarde.

D

phoebe64

What Dee said, lol.

Good luck, Renarde! I would have loved an isolation room for studying. I can get so bugged by noises when I try to focus and learn.

Kaneda8888

Fishy

Just make sure you're not going to have a jello shot

I remember the first time I did jello shots was on a training course in the States. My lovely US colleagues and I had a party one night where i was introduced to "quarters", jello shots and drinking from a hole in a beer can after shaking it up. Needless to say, the next day was ugly for all concerned.

Renarde

I knowwwwww However what I'm trying to get into is so competitive that every point helps! AND the professor said she would allow me to make up the extra points I missed. So I still have a shot at a 4.0. Wooo!

I'm a big dork, I know.

Rochele, I do love this room! Now no one is here.

I am sort of on the brink....I just cried at an online commercial. lmao.

I ate dinner, have coffee, and a chocolate pastry. Here we go!

Br00ksie

Goooo Renarde!!!


You are SUCH a superwoman!
Your superhero logo is obvi a fox and your theme music should be Foxy Lady by Hendrix! (okay, maybe a little provocative, but it's the only song I could think of with fox in it)

I suppose sappy online commercials are your kryptonite..

Uninvited

Sober routine starting to feel good. Still boring at times but oh well.

GotGrace

Heck, I would love an isolation room right now.

Go get 'em Renarde! We are all cheering you on!!

GotGrace

So, I have noticed a big payoff from being sober especially these past couple of weeks and here it is: I am actually enjoying the holiday season as much as possible and I am handling the stress of it sooooo much better than I would if I were still drinking.

For instance, this morning I had to bring a gift for my Bible study small group, bring food for the group, and have my 5 year old with me and packed for her morning in play group, lunchtime, and preschool where it was her special day and she had to provide snack, show and tell, and have all her snow clothes because the high today was 6 degrees. What?!?! Throw in that I had to get my son registered for high school by noon and provide his birth certificate and several other documents, and this would have been a really horrible morning a year ago. Hungover, eating junk to make myself feel better, and for sure I would have forgotten several items that I needed for the day. In fact, I probably would have just skipped Bible study and dealt with everything else at a much slower pace.

I didn't miss a thing and I actually got some more Christmas shopping done this afternoon. I really feel engaged and energized. And I am so looking forward to Christmas morning without a hangover.

LillianGish

Many of my co-workers went to a Holiday happy hour tonight, sponsored by an insurance company. Every year, there are stories the next day of who was a trainwreck, who threw up in a planter, inappropriate PDA, parties in hotel rooms, passing out in the lobby, oy. Keep waiting for someone to get killed while driving home drunk.

So glad I'm not there! I really am comfortable saying to a few of my company's upper management - "I choose not to go. It's usually a drunken mellee and it's really not my thing." It's a relief not to have to fit in by partying.

Maybe I need a note from my doctor saying I'm too well to attend.

Renarde, I want an isolation room. With a bathtub and bubble bath too!

Edited to add: I received a really nice/expensive bottle of wine as a gift today. Re-gifted it to a co-worker (with honesty), telling her I don't drink anymore and that I'd love to give it to her instead. That felt nice!!!

LillianGish

I am feeling the same way! Yay for us!!!

So happy for you Grace.

kellbell123

I feel the same way Grace and Lill!

kellbell123

Glad you're finding some serenity, UI

phoebe64

I am glad I am sober, but not feeling the energy. I do really think SAD is dragging me down. Just tired and sluggish. Not "happy", but just getting through the days. I am not sad, either, but am aware that I am not exactly joyful, but feeling sluggish and tired and draggy all the time. But, I have not been 100% sober since September. Have had slips and as recently as Sunday. So, maybe that has me disappointed and stuck in an early phase. Need to get over the hump to gain confidence in myself with this.

I will never feel confident until I get 6 months or more. This is because I have had close to 4-5 months in the past and *never* thought, back then, I would find myself struggling at all with this 3 years later. I was very sure I was done with it then. But, here I am.

Ok, back to mindfulness. Nothing I can do about what is done. I am sober tonight and glad to be so. I will wake up feeling good tomorrow too. That never gets old, even if I am tired, it beats a hangover day anyday!

Renarde

You'll get to 6 months Rochele! Stick with our class! When was the last time you had your D3 tested? I know you supplement, but it may not be enough. Are you able to get any exercise? I find that when I can't get any activity in, I feel exactly like you describe. You have really made a lot of changes in your thinking and attitude since we started in September. ((Rochele))

LG, you rock! So impressed! Wow.

Brooksie, so glad you are taking care of yourself. Going to GA was just not a good thing for you right now. You are such a recovery badass.

UI, I am so happy to hear that. Hopefully the boredom will morph into contentment. That's what I went through.

Thank you everyone for the support! I am still at the library. I don't like staying so late. I may stay until they close at midnight. It gets creepy and I get anxious. I keep reassuring myself by looking for other people, and there are still people here. I paid to park out front because no way in hell am I walking to the student lots late at night. I'm sort of tempted to wait until they close so I can walk out with other people. It gets dark where I live at 4:30 pm in the winter. I really don't like that.

phoebe64

Renarde, does the campus have an escort service(for escorting you safely around campus, not for dates, lol)?

I do need to push through and exercise. I have not been feeling well rested and that makes it so hard. Also, my doc would not test my D levels when I asked her! Simply said, "Not recommended since 85% of people are deficient, so go ahead and take a supplement. One 1000mg pill a day." I have doubled up lately. She speaks the language of managed care...

Renarde

Your doc is a dummy. I take 2000 units a day or 4000 units every other day and maintain at 50 something in my bloodwork. 54 is the level where you start to get relief from SAD and prevent cancers, etc. 1000 units may not make a dent for you. I would insist. D3 is a hormone and when you supplement with it you need your levels so you can hit an effective dose. It's a relatively cheap test. I would demand it. If my doc said that I would tell her I really want it and it's my money and insurance. If you want articles I can give thrm to you. In fact, it was William Davis MD who educated me about D3 through his heart scan blog (which he did prior to Wheat Belly). You should go there and see what he has to say.
Xoxox

They have security on campus but I've never asked about it. I decided to come home. I was getting a bit jumpy.

Renarde

By the way, patient centered care these days means that the patient should be viewed as the primary driver and owner of their healthcare. It's good that she knows that everyone is deficient, but we test it to make sure the patients are getting enough, or too much (which is more rare but it happens). /end soapbox (I'm obsessed with D3, can you tell?)