Class of October 2013 - Part 5
Member
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: Tampa FL
Posts: 178
....you know what I also did? I tested the waters with my husband telling him I felt like having my favourite wheat beer. His reaction was "go to store and get it". As you guys know, he never really supported or understood me stopping drinking anyway so it wasn't even a thought for him to try to stop me. I let his response be just the validation I needed to make my choice to drink. Next time I will ask you guys instead!
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,438
welcome back CD...I learned the hard way that my friends, family and loved ones will not/can not be my sobriety police.
having a support base here of people who know and understand is really invaluable - I urge everyone to post here before you give in to any urges
congrats to all the tobers hitting milestones today
D
having a support base here of people who know and understand is really invaluable - I urge everyone to post here before you give in to any urges
congrats to all the tobers hitting milestones today
D
Member
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: Tampa FL
Posts: 178
Yep DD, I agree, it is insane how difficult it is. I guess that is why so few actually succeed 
. You really do have to put in the work and effort (as you are doing). I got lazy and that enabled my AV to get me. Ugh, alcohol should be banned.
. You really do have to put in the work and effort (as you are doing). I got lazy and that enabled my AV to get me. Ugh, alcohol should be banned.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2013
Posts: 2,805
CD, I am kind of relieved that you regretted it right off. My big fear is that I will relapse and at first it won't be so bad and it will be kind of fun and I won't start regretting it again until I am fully enmeshed in a habit or back to white knuckling moderation.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,438
The first 90 days were hard work for me.
It got easier after that - I began to feel that I preferred being sober..the first stirrings of acceptance and the letting go of wanting to drink again I guess?
anyway, the tussles with cravings grew less and I was able to move on to a wider canvas and look at the whole of my life not just drinking
don't lose heart - as I said to someone yesterday - this feels like an eternity but you will look back and marvel at the speed at which this all happened.
It's not always this intense, I promise
D
It got easier after that - I began to feel that I preferred being sober..the first stirrings of acceptance and the letting go of wanting to drink again I guess?
anyway, the tussles with cravings grew less and I was able to move on to a wider canvas and look at the whole of my life not just drinking
don't lose heart - as I said to someone yesterday - this feels like an eternity but you will look back and marvel at the speed at which this all happened.
It's not always this intense, I promise
D
Member
Join Date: Nov 2011
Location: Ohio
Posts: 818
CD ... Learn from the experience. You said you started drinking after the guests left ... and that you had at most 5 beers. If I may say, moderate drinkers don't knock back 5 beers after the party is over. I say that because I've had similar thoughts. The weather has turned cold. The fire is blazing. Sure would be nice to unwind with a night cap. My problem is that while that can be a pleasurable experience, I know I wouldn't stop at one! That's the issue.
Another point, my wife is supportive, but she doesn't understand this addiction like all of you. She thinks moderation is possible, so if I brought up the topic of having a drink or two, she wouldn't object. There is no reason for moderate drinkers to understand how we approach drinking.
DD ... My drinking at the end was a lot of work, but so is sobriety! I have to believe that this will get easier with time. All I know is that I feel better physically, mentally, and spiritually now that I'm sober. Drinking wasn't working out, so I'm committed to giving sober living a fair shake.
Another point, my wife is supportive, but she doesn't understand this addiction like all of you. She thinks moderation is possible, so if I brought up the topic of having a drink or two, she wouldn't object. There is no reason for moderate drinkers to understand how we approach drinking.
DD ... My drinking at the end was a lot of work, but so is sobriety! I have to believe that this will get easier with time. All I know is that I feel better physically, mentally, and spiritually now that I'm sober. Drinking wasn't working out, so I'm committed to giving sober living a fair shake.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2013
Posts: 2,805
My husband has had blind adoration for me from almost the get-go. I love being loved by that man, but if I called him right now and asked him to bring home a bottle of wine, I know that he would. He barely drinks at all now that I quit. I watch him drink 1.5 beers on occasion and then switch to seltzer. I think to myself, how can it even be worth those calories?!? he he he We are definitely wired differently.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: Texas
Posts: 1,329
I agree with WD, at the end it was more work than it was worth to hide my drinking. I have so much less stress in my life now. Sometimes I find that the lack of stress leads to boredom. Others have said this is serenity, but it sure feels like boredom to me. I believe Dee about the 90 day mark. I am quickly approaching that magic number and I'm finding myself at peace with not drinking. It frees up so much more in my life, especially at the times I used to drink.
I also have the support of my wife now. She agreed that it's better that I don't drink since I have the propensity to make it a habit.
I also have the support of my wife now. She agreed that it's better that I don't drink since I have the propensity to make it a habit.
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Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,438
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