Class of November 2011 Part 8
Member
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: FL
Posts: 1,072
Checking in here too! Picked up my two year chip last Saturday! Who would have known! Yay for all of us!
Haven't moved out yet...lol. Had a long talk with hubby about our situation. Went to an al anon meeting on Sunday night...that was interesting...it was all middle aged women...no men. I had never been to one and of course started sharing my story....then the whole hour was almost silent..turns out if you are in another 12 step program you aren't supposed to talk about that......OOps!
I felt like I broke some huge rule...the people were not really open or friendly. Hardly anyone shared and the meeting I go to for AA the some are all very chatty.. Oh well....I guess I will try another one some day.
Had a long talk with hubby, he knows I went...even though he told me not to go yet...that he could prove he can get better...but told him I needed to go for me, not him. I also made an appt with a therapist that a friend recommended. I get 4 free visits through my work...so might as well use them.
So life as an alcoholic and with one is crazy...for now things are great at home, but its only been three days sober. He thinks he can moderate better....hmm....how many times did we say that! Still have my friends house key...just in case.
Haven't moved out yet...lol. Had a long talk with hubby about our situation. Went to an al anon meeting on Sunday night...that was interesting...it was all middle aged women...no men. I had never been to one and of course started sharing my story....then the whole hour was almost silent..turns out if you are in another 12 step program you aren't supposed to talk about that......OOps!
I felt like I broke some huge rule...the people were not really open or friendly. Hardly anyone shared and the meeting I go to for AA the some are all very chatty.. Oh well....I guess I will try another one some day.
Had a long talk with hubby, he knows I went...even though he told me not to go yet...that he could prove he can get better...but told him I needed to go for me, not him. I also made an appt with a therapist that a friend recommended. I get 4 free visits through my work...so might as well use them.
So life as an alcoholic and with one is crazy...for now things are great at home, but its only been three days sober. He thinks he can moderate better....hmm....how many times did we say that! Still have my friends house key...just in case.
Resident Curmudgeon
Join Date: Nov 2011
Location: Way down South in Indiana
Posts: 375
I still have another couple of weeks before hitting the 2 year mark.
Things are going well here and I've been keeping busy doing not a lot of anything. (you probably have to be retired to fully grasp this concept).
Tres-I hope this "reconciliation" works for you, but from the sound of it he still appears to be in denial. I'm somewhat of an expert about denial since I raised it to an art form over 30 years.
Busy morning, I'm off to the gastro guy for a consult regarding a colonoscopy (screening) ...see all the fun stuff I do!
Bimm
Things are going well here and I've been keeping busy doing not a lot of anything. (you probably have to be retired to fully grasp this concept).
Tres-I hope this "reconciliation" works for you, but from the sound of it he still appears to be in denial. I'm somewhat of an expert about denial since I raised it to an art form over 30 years.
Busy morning, I'm off to the gastro guy for a consult regarding a colonoscopy (screening) ...see all the fun stuff I do!
Bimm
Member
Join Date: Nov 2011
Location: New Jersey
Posts: 2,707
Wow Bimm what a glamourous life you lead!
Tres I agree with Bimm; unfortunately it is his own journey, and as we all know there's not much you or anyone can do until he decides it's time to quit. Hopefully the fact that he might lose his family directly because of alcohol might wake him up and make him see the light. Maybe it will take losing you. Hope not, but that's the way it works sometimes.
I'm hoping for the best for you though. Once again I must tell you how much I admire your ability to stay sober through all of this. Truly you're a strong person.
Hi Marine! How are you?
And Vantrina! Hi! Thanks for your nice note to me a few posts back.
Tres I agree with Bimm; unfortunately it is his own journey, and as we all know there's not much you or anyone can do until he decides it's time to quit. Hopefully the fact that he might lose his family directly because of alcohol might wake him up and make him see the light. Maybe it will take losing you. Hope not, but that's the way it works sometimes.
I'm hoping for the best for you though. Once again I must tell you how much I admire your ability to stay sober through all of this. Truly you're a strong person.
Hi Marine! How are you?
And Vantrina! Hi! Thanks for your nice note to me a few posts back.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: FL
Posts: 1,072
Well Bimm and IP, hubby made it four days and was bitchy and crabby. He got mad at the dogs and drug them both across the floor for chewing up a couple of things..Then Friday night he was mad at a friend because he didn't get invited to his birthday party. He was testing his other friends who were there asking why..it went on all night like that. Of course he was drinking by then because he was "fuming". He went out on the dock for awhile. Daughter and I went out a little later to see how he was feeling. He was still texting and talking to his friends..pissed off. He accused us of interrupting his evening. I told him he needs to get a plan, or program. He needs to work on his triggers....blah blah blah....of course he wanted to argue and I wouldn't.
Saturday he was as sweet as pie, lovey dovey, huggy, etc...he didn't drink at all. Took me out for dinner and we watched a movie at home. He was the guy that I love.
Sunday afternoon he took off with his drinking buddies on the lake. Came home in about an hour, peeked his head in the kitchen where I was cooking a really nice dinner for us. He said he was going to play cornhole and would not be out late. "I know the drill. Don't drink too much and stay out late.". No mention of dinner or even eating any. So daughter and I ate alone like most nights and went to bed. I heard all sorts of noise in the kitchen. He was fixing his dinner at 1am. He had just gotten home. He kept apologizing...I didn't speak much to him, but IPI felt angry and couldn't get back to sleep. This morning I found all his dirty dishes all over the kitchen...I didn't clean them up either.
Not my problem! On a brighter note I went and looked at some apartments . My mom said she will come down for a while. They have 7 month leases. They are new and really beautiful. That will be my retreat. My no. Is very excited to get out of the winter and be close to us. We have been talking about this for years and we just need to do it.
I have a plan! I have a safe place for my daughter to go and we can be with sober family! Peace and tranquility!
Now I just have to figure out what to tell my husband. How much or how little to tell him..etc.. She is planning on coming in January.
Thanks for listening. I know this is going to be a bumpy ride.
Saturday he was as sweet as pie, lovey dovey, huggy, etc...he didn't drink at all. Took me out for dinner and we watched a movie at home. He was the guy that I love.
Sunday afternoon he took off with his drinking buddies on the lake. Came home in about an hour, peeked his head in the kitchen where I was cooking a really nice dinner for us. He said he was going to play cornhole and would not be out late. "I know the drill. Don't drink too much and stay out late.". No mention of dinner or even eating any. So daughter and I ate alone like most nights and went to bed. I heard all sorts of noise in the kitchen. He was fixing his dinner at 1am. He had just gotten home. He kept apologizing...I didn't speak much to him, but IPI felt angry and couldn't get back to sleep. This morning I found all his dirty dishes all over the kitchen...I didn't clean them up either.
Not my problem! On a brighter note I went and looked at some apartments . My mom said she will come down for a while. They have 7 month leases. They are new and really beautiful. That will be my retreat. My no. Is very excited to get out of the winter and be close to us. We have been talking about this for years and we just need to do it.
I have a plan! I have a safe place for my daughter to go and we can be with sober family! Peace and tranquility!
Now I just have to figure out what to tell my husband. How much or how little to tell him..etc.. She is planning on coming in January.
Thanks for listening. I know this is going to be a bumpy ride.
Resident Curmudgeon
Join Date: Nov 2011
Location: Way down South in Indiana
Posts: 375
Tres-
Your plan sounds very reasonable and well thought out. This situation has to be tough on you and your daughter. Just remember that we are all here for you to share, discuss, rant or whatever.
Bimm
Your plan sounds very reasonable and well thought out. This situation has to be tough on you and your daughter. Just remember that we are all here for you to share, discuss, rant or whatever.
Bimm
Member
Join Date: Nov 2011
Location: Right here, right now
Posts: 306
Hi Everyone,
Tres, I admire how you are handling the situation with your husband. You are taking care of yourself and the most important person in all of this right now, your daughter. Bimm is spot on when he says you know you can always come here to vent and get support.
Congratulations to you on hitting your two year anniversary, Tres. Two years of sobriety is no small thing.
(Don't forget that!)
Wrote a few paragraphs here last night but guess I was too slow because when I went to postI lost everything….so I'm keeping it short tonight. #sigh
Have been going through some "transitional" stress and am noticing a resurgence of my sugar cravings. Have eaten more oreo-like cookies over the past four days than I would ike to admit. No longer buying them or keeping them in the house as of today. Kidding aside, has anyone ever experienced a resurgence of sugar cravings during high stress times?
Trying to get more sleep, so turning in early these days.Have a good night everyone.
Tres, I admire how you are handling the situation with your husband. You are taking care of yourself and the most important person in all of this right now, your daughter. Bimm is spot on when he says you know you can always come here to vent and get support.
Congratulations to you on hitting your two year anniversary, Tres. Two years of sobriety is no small thing.
(Don't forget that!) Wrote a few paragraphs here last night but guess I was too slow because when I went to postI lost everything….so I'm keeping it short tonight. #sigh
Have been going through some "transitional" stress and am noticing a resurgence of my sugar cravings. Have eaten more oreo-like cookies over the past four days than I would ike to admit. No longer buying them or keeping them in the house as of today. Kidding aside, has anyone ever experienced a resurgence of sugar cravings during high stress times?
Trying to get more sleep, so turning in early these days.Have a good night everyone.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: FL
Posts: 1,072
Thanks for all the support. You all will hear it play by play. This week he has been great, but of course tonight he is at the neighbors playing cornhole. He said he would eat with them...fine with me.
I forgot to tell you I am going to see a therapist also. Its free through work, so I might as well use all the tools I have.
Vantrina...I know I crave sweets when I am stressed. My downfall are those mini Snickers... Omg...I stuff tons of them down my throat before I realize it!
My job is going great. The new nurse I hired to replace me is doing great. I can focus about 90% now on my new job.
Also started a 21 day meditation with Oprah and Deepak Chopra. I have never done anything like that. I have slept great after listening to it...definitely helps me unwind.
I forgot to tell you I am going to see a therapist also. Its free through work, so I might as well use all the tools I have.
Vantrina...I know I crave sweets when I am stressed. My downfall are those mini Snickers... Omg...I stuff tons of them down my throat before I realize it!
My job is going great. The new nurse I hired to replace me is doing great. I can focus about 90% now on my new job.
Also started a 21 day meditation with Oprah and Deepak Chopra. I have never done anything like that. I have slept great after listening to it...definitely helps me unwind.
Resident Curmudgeon
Join Date: Nov 2011
Location: Way down South in Indiana
Posts: 375
My diet and exercise regimen is going pretty well. So far I've lost about 14 lbs. Been dropping about 1 or 2 lbs per week lately which I guess is pretty safe, so I'm happy with the progress. I'd like to shed another 10lbs., but I'm not going to be obsessive about it.
Today was a bland diet and tomorrow is "liquids only" in prep for Monday's colonoscopy screening. I don't handle hunger well and have a tendency to become belligerent when food deprived and not much fun to be around. I savored every morsel of tonight's meal of simple grilled chicken and a baked potato knowing it would be my last real food for 40 hours or so, although I may sneak in a snack just before midnight.
Enough about me already, how's everyone doing??
Today was a bland diet and tomorrow is "liquids only" in prep for Monday's colonoscopy screening. I don't handle hunger well and have a tendency to become belligerent when food deprived and not much fun to be around. I savored every morsel of tonight's meal of simple grilled chicken and a baked potato knowing it would be my last real food for 40 hours or so, although I may sneak in a snack just before midnight.
Enough about me already, how's everyone doing??
Guest
Join Date: Nov 2011
Location: Here, there and everywhere
Posts: 559
Hi everyone! Tres, Bimm, IP, Vantrina....thanks for all of your recent posts.
Glad everyone is doing well and congrats again on the 2-year mark. I am plugging along and coming up on the 7-month mark here next Friday.
Tres - sorry to hear about the situation with your husband, but I agree with the others - sounds like you have made some good decisions about your future. I am also doing the 21-day Oprah/Deepak meditation series - trying to get into a routine with a specific time each morning. It's great, isn't it? I especially liked "Day 5 on Abundance."
Vantrina - I have been going through the same thing with the sugar. I ate an entire pound of Italian Christmas cookies and a cream puff the other day! I think my trigger is boredom. But definitely a surge in sugar intake. Good thing I started running. More on that in a minute.
Bimm - good luck with the colonoscopy. I have not had the pleasure of having one yet, though one is overdue. I think we are supposed to start getting them when we are 50?
IP - how is the writing going?
So what's going on here with me? Well I am "training" for a 4-mile run on Thanksgiving Day. A group of people from the office are running this traditional T-Day event. Not sure why it is "4 miles", and not a 5K, but anyway, I am going to try. I told them I do not run unless I am being chased. Every day I try to walk 3-4 miles and "run" in between. I will run for an entire song on my iPod and then walk for 2-3 songs. At least I am building up my stamina and won't be too far behind. The problem seems to be my legs hurt, not that I get winded or anything like that. Guess I am in good shape from a Cardio standpoint.
I gave my notice on my apartment down here in Florida and am starting the next adventure in my life in late December. I decided to go with my passion and get that place in the Caribbean for 3 months. My employer has allowed me to work from there, since it's typically a slow time of year for us and with today's internet/smart phone/facetime/Skype access, I should be okay from that standpoint. I agreed that if it presents itself to be a hardship for everyone else at work, I would come back. So I am leaving Florida in mid-December and driving to New York to spend the Holidays with my family and then will be heading out around New Year's. I am really looking forward to it!
There are no AA meetings on this island so I am going to rely on the online chat rooms and forums, so you guys can expect to see a lot more of me starting in January. Hope you don't mind! ;-) Meetings have been an important part of my sobriety and I go to two face to face meetings a week.
I have mixed emotions about leaving Florida - I have finally met a few friends and it has taken me a long time to "find friends". That said, it is certainly not a reason to stay here. I have already packed up the kitchen stuff I brought with me and the bags are by the door so that says a lot....I think. I am not pulling away until 12/15! I was running around packing up stuff last night like I was leaving today. That is something I really need to ponder.
I think I am searching for that place where I will find total happiness and serenity and that is why I grow restless so easily. Going back to the place (Caribbean) where my husband and I spent so much time and had such good memories is going to be quite an exercise. To paraphrase my boss .... "I hope I find what I am looking for."
Well, enough for now. I am going to a local Farmer's market and then to the beach.
Will be going to Las Vegas this week for work conference, so the sobriety is going to be tested for sure. Never been to Vegas without drinking and the work crowd I am going with is a heavy drinking crowd. I have asked my sister to go with me, so I will not be around all that stuff alone. I will be fine during the day working but at night I was concerned. We have tickets to see some shows and have some nice dinners so it should be fun.
:
Marine
Glad everyone is doing well and congrats again on the 2-year mark. I am plugging along and coming up on the 7-month mark here next Friday.
Tres - sorry to hear about the situation with your husband, but I agree with the others - sounds like you have made some good decisions about your future. I am also doing the 21-day Oprah/Deepak meditation series - trying to get into a routine with a specific time each morning. It's great, isn't it? I especially liked "Day 5 on Abundance."
Vantrina - I have been going through the same thing with the sugar. I ate an entire pound of Italian Christmas cookies and a cream puff the other day! I think my trigger is boredom. But definitely a surge in sugar intake. Good thing I started running. More on that in a minute.
Bimm - good luck with the colonoscopy. I have not had the pleasure of having one yet, though one is overdue. I think we are supposed to start getting them when we are 50?
IP - how is the writing going?
So what's going on here with me? Well I am "training" for a 4-mile run on Thanksgiving Day. A group of people from the office are running this traditional T-Day event. Not sure why it is "4 miles", and not a 5K, but anyway, I am going to try. I told them I do not run unless I am being chased. Every day I try to walk 3-4 miles and "run" in between. I will run for an entire song on my iPod and then walk for 2-3 songs. At least I am building up my stamina and won't be too far behind. The problem seems to be my legs hurt, not that I get winded or anything like that. Guess I am in good shape from a Cardio standpoint.
I gave my notice on my apartment down here in Florida and am starting the next adventure in my life in late December. I decided to go with my passion and get that place in the Caribbean for 3 months. My employer has allowed me to work from there, since it's typically a slow time of year for us and with today's internet/smart phone/facetime/Skype access, I should be okay from that standpoint. I agreed that if it presents itself to be a hardship for everyone else at work, I would come back. So I am leaving Florida in mid-December and driving to New York to spend the Holidays with my family and then will be heading out around New Year's. I am really looking forward to it!
There are no AA meetings on this island so I am going to rely on the online chat rooms and forums, so you guys can expect to see a lot more of me starting in January. Hope you don't mind! ;-) Meetings have been an important part of my sobriety and I go to two face to face meetings a week.
I have mixed emotions about leaving Florida - I have finally met a few friends and it has taken me a long time to "find friends". That said, it is certainly not a reason to stay here. I have already packed up the kitchen stuff I brought with me and the bags are by the door so that says a lot....I think. I am not pulling away until 12/15! I was running around packing up stuff last night like I was leaving today. That is something I really need to ponder.
I think I am searching for that place where I will find total happiness and serenity and that is why I grow restless so easily. Going back to the place (Caribbean) where my husband and I spent so much time and had such good memories is going to be quite an exercise. To paraphrase my boss .... "I hope I find what I am looking for."
Well, enough for now. I am going to a local Farmer's market and then to the beach.
Will be going to Las Vegas this week for work conference, so the sobriety is going to be tested for sure. Never been to Vegas without drinking and the work crowd I am going with is a heavy drinking crowd. I have asked my sister to go with me, so I will not be around all that stuff alone. I will be fine during the day working but at night I was concerned. We have tickets to see some shows and have some nice dinners so it should be fun.
:Marine
Resident Curmudgeon
Join Date: Nov 2011
Location: Way down South in Indiana
Posts: 375
Marine-I love the Carib. Spent loads of time on most of the Islands back when I was doing scuba and scuba instructions. I'm jealous!
Today is my 2 year anniversary. I don't have anything special planned and perhaps that is how it should be since sobriety is now just a normal part of my existence.
Made it through the colonoscopy yesterday. I would encourage everyone, including you and or your loved ones, who are due or overdue for the screening to get it done. The horror stories you read about are greatly exagerated based upon my experience. The prep is annoying (nothing more) and the procedure was totally painless due to the nice "Versed Lady". Colo-rectal cancer is the second or third leading cause of cancer deaths each year.
Bimm
Today is my 2 year anniversary. I don't have anything special planned and perhaps that is how it should be since sobriety is now just a normal part of my existence.
Made it through the colonoscopy yesterday. I would encourage everyone, including you and or your loved ones, who are due or overdue for the screening to get it done. The horror stories you read about are greatly exagerated based upon my experience. The prep is annoying (nothing more) and the procedure was totally painless due to the nice "Versed Lady". Colo-rectal cancer is the second or third leading cause of cancer deaths each year.
Bimm
Member
Join Date: Nov 2011
Location: New Jersey
Posts: 2,707
Bimm: It is most certainly not a "normal day", it is a great achievement! Congratulations!
Hey Marine--my dad and his wife go to Vegas all the time, they don't drink. They have a blast enjoying all there is to do there with clear heads and energy. They go jogging on the strip, haha! Maybe that's something you could do!
I am so jealous of your trip to the Carribean. I would give ANYTHING to be able to live at the beach, just for awhile!
My writing is going well, thanks for asking! Have sold a few stories here and there with hopefully more on the horizon. It's a fun life at the moment, freelancing is pretty nice I must say. My dog is happy having me home all the time.
Tres, how's it going?
Vantrina! How's it going?
And how is Darren?
Our group is small but I'm glad y'all are still around.
Hey Marine--my dad and his wife go to Vegas all the time, they don't drink. They have a blast enjoying all there is to do there with clear heads and energy. They go jogging on the strip, haha! Maybe that's something you could do!
I am so jealous of your trip to the Carribean. I would give ANYTHING to be able to live at the beach, just for awhile!
My writing is going well, thanks for asking! Have sold a few stories here and there with hopefully more on the horizon. It's a fun life at the moment, freelancing is pretty nice I must say. My dog is happy having me home all the time.
Tres, how's it going?
Vantrina! How's it going?
And how is Darren?
Our group is small but I'm glad y'all are still around.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2011
Location: Right here, right now
Posts: 306
Hey Everyone,
Bimm, congratulations on reaching your two year milestone. Even though sobriety is part of your day to day, the milestone is worth celebrating. Good for you!
Smart of you going for your coloscopy. I have had one done and I agree, the negative hype out there is worse than the actual experience. Again, good for you.
Marine, it is good to read your update. It sounds like you are drawn to the Carribean; I wish you all good things when you are there.
Thinking my sugar cravings were part stress and part hormones (?) This week, the thought of an oreo-like cookie is just not appealing. Trying also to workout more and have been hitting the gym at night, after dinner. So far, it seems to be working.
I agree with you IP, our group is small, but we are still here to support one another. Dee, you are included, of course!
'night all.
Bimm, congratulations on reaching your two year milestone.
Even though sobriety is part of your day to day, the milestone is worth celebrating. Good for you!Smart of you going for your coloscopy. I have had one done and I agree, the negative hype out there is worse than the actual experience. Again, good for you.
Marine, it is good to read your update. It sounds like you are drawn to the Carribean; I wish you all good things when you are there.
Thinking my sugar cravings were part stress and part hormones (?) This week, the thought of an oreo-like cookie is just not appealing. Trying also to workout more and have been hitting the gym at night, after dinner. So far, it seems to be working.
I agree with you IP, our group is small, but we are still here to support one another. Dee, you are included, of course!
'night all.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2011
Location: Right here, right now
Posts: 306
Today marks my two year sober anniversary. Rock on!
I felt especially festive all day. I dressed up a bit more than usual; I treated myself by making even the simplest things more celebratory. I practiced gratitude all day. I told no one. (The only people who know the significance of this day are my husband and all of you.) I am just so happy to be living a sober life. My day reflected this.
As I have shared before, there is no doubt that the overall quality of my life has improved so much due to my sobriety these past TWO years. All of you have been and remain an important part of the process for me.
Hope everyone has a happy and sober day today.
I felt especially festive all day. I dressed up a bit more than usual; I treated myself by making even the simplest things more celebratory. I practiced gratitude all day. I told no one. (The only people who know the significance of this day are my husband and all of you.) I am just so happy to be living a sober life. My day reflected this.
As I have shared before, there is no doubt that the overall quality of my life has improved so much due to my sobriety these past TWO years. All of you have been and remain an important part of the process for me.
Hope everyone has a happy and sober day today.
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