Class of July 2013 Pt 6
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,355
congrats ladybug and outdoorsman 
85 days is awesome Humbug but I needed to change my life cos the old one was pretty much booze centred- same with me and my problem solving skills- also booze centered
what changes have you made besides just not drinking?
D
85 days is awesome Humbug but I needed to change my life cos the old one was pretty much booze centred- same with me and my problem solving skills- also booze centered
what changes have you made besides just not drinking?
D
Member
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: Hawaii
Posts: 387
Originally Posted by Dee74 
congrats ladybug and outdoorsman
85 days is awesome Humbug but I needed to change my life cos the old one was pretty much booze centred- same with me and my problem solving skills- also booze centered
what changes have you made besides just not drinking?
D
85 days is awesome Humbug but I needed to change my life cos the old one was pretty much booze centred- same with me and my problem solving skills- also booze centered
what changes have you made besides just not drinking?
D
Member
Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: East Coast, The States
Posts: 12,162
QUOTE FROM HUMBUG: "*One thing I can do is more hobbies and activities."
Humbug: are there healthy hobbies or activities you used to do .... or ones you always wanted to do... that you can try now?
Humbug: are there healthy hobbies or activities you used to do .... or ones you always wanted to do... that you can try now?
Member
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: Australia
Posts: 11,351
Humbug , im good ta :-)
I think its fantastic you are visiting your grandma more , she would be thrilled by this.
My Nanna died last year and i wish i had given her more of me whilst she was alive.
You just cant get those treasured times back .
I think its fantastic you are visiting your grandma more , she would be thrilled by this.
My Nanna died last year and i wish i had given her more of me whilst she was alive.
You just cant get those treasured times back .
Member
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: USA
Posts: 678
Help!!
I'm in need of help. After over 70 days, I fell hard this week. It all started at a job interview dinner where I was given a glass of wine, despite refusing it. My host wouldn't take no for an answer. This was a week ago and the one glass slowly turned into a full on binge. I feel defeated and ashamed. What can I do? I just arrived home after a long flight. No sleep, can barely eat. Should I tell my wife or just keep it to myself. She will be very disappointed in me and I don't want to burden her again with my addiction. I'm not going to drink at all today and I swear last night was my last drink. Need all the help and support I can get.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: Australia
Posts: 11,351
No matter how pushy the host is , you need a backup plan soberM .
I was so tired of saying no and yet still they would pour.
I found the best thing to do is just say , i dont drink , i have a stomach disorder .
Believe me , you will NOT be asked twice
People dont want to get into the nitty gritty of whats going down.
Plus its none of their business and you are not at liberty to divulge and feel uncomfortable
.
Dont beat yourself up , you cant change yesterday , but you have to stand by your convictions
You CAN do this :-) good luck , just hang around SR XX
I was so tired of saying no and yet still they would pour.
I found the best thing to do is just say , i dont drink , i have a stomach disorder .
Believe me , you will NOT be asked twice
People dont want to get into the nitty gritty of whats going down.
Plus its none of their business and you are not at liberty to divulge and feel uncomfortable
.
Dont beat yourself up , you cant change yesterday , but you have to stand by your convictions
You CAN do this :-) good luck , just hang around SR XX
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Ma
Posts: 3,553
SM,
Don't beat yourself up over it. After all you're back here and realize that it got out of control quickly.
You just need to get back on the wagon,ASAP!
Don't want to have to deal with withdrawal all over again.
Don't beat yourself up over it. After all you're back here and realize that it got out of control quickly.
You just need to get back on the wagon,ASAP!
Don't want to have to deal with withdrawal all over again.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Ma
Posts: 3,553
69 days and feeling good.
It's that time of year when getting ready for cold weather begins.
Fire wood is all stacked and I've been doing prevent maintenance on vehicles and other equipment. Feel so much better to be getting ready for the snow flying than running around at the last minute.
In New England you never know when bad weather will hit.
Like they say," if you don't like the weather here,wait an hour".
It's that time of year when getting ready for cold weather begins.
Fire wood is all stacked and I've been doing prevent maintenance on vehicles and other equipment. Feel so much better to be getting ready for the snow flying than running around at the last minute.
In New England you never know when bad weather will hit.
Like they say," if you don't like the weather here,wait an hour".
Member
Join Date: May 2013
Location: Northern California
Posts: 563
Thank you for your honesty SM. It is just one more reminder that no matter how successful we our with our sobriety, we can never again have "just one."
Regarding telling your wife...my boyfriend is also an alcoholic and is currently has about 45 days sobriety under his belt. I know that if he stumbled, even though I'd be concerned and disappointed, I'd prefer that he was honest and upfront with me. Because I think hiding things is as much a part of alcoholism as the actual drinking is.
Just my opinion (for whatever that's worth!)
NCG
Regarding telling your wife...my boyfriend is also an alcoholic and is currently has about 45 days sobriety under his belt. I know that if he stumbled, even though I'd be concerned and disappointed, I'd prefer that he was honest and upfront with me. Because I think hiding things is as much a part of alcoholism as the actual drinking is.
Just my opinion (for whatever that's worth!)
NCG
Member
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: USA
Posts: 678
Thanks for the support guys. I told my wife about my slip and she is disappointed for me rather than disappointed with me. I'm lucky to have someone that is understanding. This is going to be a hard one to get over. I'm very depressed at the moment - what a change a week can make.
Although I couldn't shut off the tap right away, I still did it fairly quickly. It was just obvious that I couldn't handle my booze and going back to my old ways is not a viable option. I was rapidly self-destructing, blacking out, and not even capable of remembering my hotel room number - the latter was embarrassing to say the least. Yesterday I shook with beer in hand - also very brutal behavior.
After discussing with my wife, she reminded that I can't be two different people and that I need to choose one and just be that person. It's tough to be anyone right now when I feel so crappy and down.
Although I couldn't shut off the tap right away, I still did it fairly quickly. It was just obvious that I couldn't handle my booze and going back to my old ways is not a viable option. I was rapidly self-destructing, blacking out, and not even capable of remembering my hotel room number - the latter was embarrassing to say the least. Yesterday I shook with beer in hand - also very brutal behavior.
After discussing with my wife, she reminded that I can't be two different people and that I need to choose one and just be that person. It's tough to be anyone right now when I feel so crappy and down.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: USA
Posts: 678
Called my sponsor to talk about my slip and fall back into the booze this week. That really helped to have the perspective of someone with experience. He wants me to head back to AA but I'm not sure at the moment. I seem to always repeat this pattern of getting sober, screwing up, and then panicking to get it right again. Will the cycle ever really end?
The Little Alcoholic Monstress That Could
Join Date: Oct 2009
Location: Northern California
Posts: 1,159
Welcome Katie!
Hi Outdoorsman glad to hear from you and so proud!
Day 66. The new job is just great and I'm pretty good at it. My bday is this Sunday but I don't have any plans. Will need to get homework done. Todays my day off and my son and I have errands to run. He's loving his new crib. It's super spacious and will turn into a full size bed when he's ready, years and years away of course
Have a great day all!!
Hi Outdoorsman glad to hear from you and so proud!
Day 66. The new job is just great and I'm pretty good at it. My bday is this Sunday but I don't have any plans. Will need to get homework done. Todays my day off and my son and I have errands to run. He's loving his new crib. It's super spacious and will turn into a full size bed when he's ready, years and years away of course
Have a great day all!!
Member
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Canada
Posts: 3,986
Three months (93 days), and I'm sadder than ever.
I'm not clinically depressed, but terribly sad and achingly lonely.
I have no sustained meaningful connection with anyone which I need, we all do, and it seems there's little likelihood of change in this regard. I think I'm doing all the right things, and I'm definitely looking after myself better in the last three months, but my life is forever changed without my husband, the only person in my whole life who truly "got" me, with whom I could be myself.
I've tried for six years to drink away his loss. I don't do that anymore, so perhaps I'm in a new, different grieving cycle.
I don't want another relationship, I know that.
I don't know what I can do differently. I'm flat and joyless, it's why I haven't posted lately, nothing new to say/contribute, I suppose.
I know I'm committed to staying on this sober path however.
I'm not clinically depressed, but terribly sad and achingly lonely.
I have no sustained meaningful connection with anyone which I need, we all do, and it seems there's little likelihood of change in this regard. I think I'm doing all the right things, and I'm definitely looking after myself better in the last three months, but my life is forever changed without my husband, the only person in my whole life who truly "got" me, with whom I could be myself.
I've tried for six years to drink away his loss. I don't do that anymore, so perhaps I'm in a new, different grieving cycle.
I don't want another relationship, I know that.
I don't know what I can do differently. I'm flat and joyless, it's why I haven't posted lately, nothing new to say/contribute, I suppose.
I know I'm committed to staying on this sober path however.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Pennsylvania
Posts: 3,313
Hi everyone,
Good to see you back, SM! What's done is done - try to look at it as now you know. Now you know you can never just have one. I know it is disappointing and discouraging, but you're back and it sounds like you are committed for the long haul. I admire you for coming clean with your wife and I think it will help you to be able to move forward. I agree with what NCG said - that hiding things is as much a part of alcoholism as the actual drinking is. I hid so much from my husband and our spouses don't deserve that. Keep posting - we are here for you
Good to see you back, SM! What's done is done - try to look at it as now you know. Now you know you can never just have one. I know it is disappointing and discouraging, but you're back and it sounds like you are committed for the long haul. I admire you for coming clean with your wife and I think it will help you to be able to move forward. I agree with what NCG said - that hiding things is as much a part of alcoholism as the actual drinking is. I hid so much from my husband and our spouses don't deserve that. Keep posting - we are here for you
Member
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Pennsylvania
Posts: 3,313
Originally Posted by Leshar
I've tried for six years to drink away his loss. I don't do that anymore, so perhaps I'm in a new, different grieving cycle.
.
.
I can't pretend to know what you are going through with mourning your husband, but I think you hit the nail on the head with what you said. Maybe you are experiencing a new and different grieving process. Keep doing what you are doing and it will get better with time. You have to let yourself really FEEL the bad moments before the good can come. Hang in there and keep posting. BTW, way to go on 93 days! Really proud of you
The Little Alcoholic Monstress That Could
Join Date: Oct 2009
Location: Northern California
Posts: 1,159
I second what ladybug said leshar. hang in there things will get better you will adopt a different perspective if you stick with it.
sober marathon sorry about your hiccup but it's a learning experience and the best thing is that you're back here with a clearer vision for yourself.
sober marathon sorry about your hiccup but it's a learning experience and the best thing is that you're back here with a clearer vision for yourself.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: Las Vegas, NV.
Posts: 7
Originally Posted by SoberMarathon
Called my sponsor to talk about my slip and fall back into the booze this week. That really helped to have the perspective of someone with experience. He wants me to head back to AA but I'm not sure at the moment. I seem to always repeat this pattern of getting sober, screwing up, and then panicking to get it right again. Will the cycle ever really end?
I hope you go and keep going back. xo
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,355
I seem to always repeat this pattern of getting sober, screwing up, and then panicking to get it right again. Will the cycle ever really end?
D
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