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Old 10-02-2013, 08:26 PM   #481 (permalink)
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I hope your son comes to his senses Courage. You must trust him. He has a lot of you and your husband in him, what's not to trust???
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Old 10-02-2013, 08:54 PM   #482 (permalink)
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Originally Posted by dorothyparker View Post
He has a lot of you and your husband in him, what's not to trust???
OMG you're trying to terrify me, right?
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Old 10-02-2013, 09:04 PM   #483 (permalink)
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Courage- The first few months had a lot of ups and downs and stuff to get used to. Both quitting alcohol and quitting marijuana cause PAWS, so I've felt like I had a double dose of PAWS symptoms. But, I've done as much as possible to ease them and now at almost 6 months no alcohol and 2 1/2 months no weed, I am starting to feel a bit more stable (I hope I don't jinx myself saying that).

The symptoms you describe do sound like PAWS.

Here is a really good article on PAWS that describes the symptoms and things you can do to ease them. I highly recommend it.
Why We Don’t Get Better Immediately: Post-acute Withdrawal Syndrome (PAWS) | What...Me Sober?

Here is another that gets into the neurochemisty of recovery. Some of it may be a bit nerdy for some people, but at the end (page 10), it has a list of brain chemicals that get out of whack from addiction and types of food you can eat that help your body to generate them. The same page also mentions that caffeine, sugar, high-fat foods, alcohol and nicotine contribute to the depletion of serotonin.
http://www.texinstitute.com/wordpres...0_Friedman.pdf

I think both articles mention that healing from PAWS require complete abstinence from all mood altering drugs.

I have definitely found that a healthy diet has been very beneficial in recovery. Especially in the early months. Many times, I would feel bad and I wasn't used to eating regularly so I wasn't always aware that I was 'hungry'. But a lot of times, a healthy snack and some water would help my mood a lot and it turned out I just felt bad due to low blood sugar. I had sugar cravings in the beginning, but I had read that sugar is bad for recovering alcoholics, so I avoided it almost entirely. I found that a healthy snack or meal and some water generally cured the sugar cravings anyway and they disappeared entirely within a few weeks. Plus as alcoholics, we tend to eat less healthy food as we get a lot of calories from alcohol and also our bodies are less efficient at getting nutrients. That combination leads to malnutrition adding to us feeling bad when we quit, so a healthy diet is extra important for us.

Sugar and caffeine both cause a rise in blood sugar levels, followed by a crash. That crash is a vulnerable state as it makes us feel bad emotionally and can cause us to crave alcohol. Best to avoid it entirely by eating healthier foods.

I also read (and I'm not sure where now) that sugar is very similar to alcohol. I think alcohol gets broken down into sugar in the body and supplies one with a lot of fast, non-nutritious energy. Thus when we quit drinking, we start craving sugar to replace the sugar in the alcohol. But continuing to eat sugar kind of keeps that part of the addiction alive.

Here is another interesting article about smoking and recovery. Not sure how you get your nicotine, or if there are any studies on people who use nicotine in ways other than smoking and recovery from alcoholism. But I would assume the differences seen are caused primarily from the nicotine in the cigarettes.
Smoking Harms Brain's Recovery from Alcoholism

Here's a link to my spiel on caffeine as well. http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ml#post4140194
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Old 10-02-2013, 09:08 PM   #484 (permalink)
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Urge surfing can work for fear too Courage?

D
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Old 10-03-2013, 12:01 AM   #485 (permalink)
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Courage, Courage. All will work out

DP my dearest congratulations
Back later xx
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Old 10-03-2013, 03:12 AM   #486 (permalink)
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I'm thinking of you today, courage. I hope things work out for you and your son.

DP - congrats!!

DG - I like your all out approach to this fight.

Good morning to all!

Enjoy your day.
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Old 10-03-2013, 03:29 AM   #487 (permalink)
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Congratulations on 9 months Dorothy!
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Old 10-03-2013, 03:39 AM   #488 (permalink)
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GM Undies,
Just a quick HELLO!
Courage, my thoughts are with you today. Me thinks having half of your genes is a good thing.
DP, just saw your note...it's morning so I will have a fancy coffee for your 3/4 year sober. Please join me in virtual celebration.
BF, bring that talk on. Trust me, this lot has heard it all...I have for sure received great advice from the Undies, too.
Steve, so great to see you posting again. When is your next day off?
wwg, this is just one of many events that you will attend in your new sober skin. It will get easier, and every bit as much fun.
((Siesta)), hope you and your hubby get to talk things out soon.
RFA, yep, Bucco fan here. Are you? Loved the sound of that soup. I am pretty much a veggie dude.

Toots and DG
Where could you be?
Oh, now I know
It's there I must go
But after I take a p** (sorry, just a 4 mo celebration funny)

AND YES....TODAY I AM 4 MONTHS SOBER!
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Old 10-03-2013, 04:09 AM   #489 (permalink)
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Attempt 3

Congratulations Dorothy, 9 month's is fantastic. I'm so proud of you.
The infamous banana boys have taken a break from training to perform their new routine.
Ta Da, just for you.
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Old 10-03-2013, 04:12 AM   #490 (permalink)
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I love those bananas lol
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Old 10-03-2013, 04:19 AM   #491 (permalink)
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Hi to all the new members to this thread, welcome to the Undies, it's good to have you with us. Stick close and keep reading and posting.

Gxx
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Old 10-03-2013, 05:34 AM   #492 (permalink)
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Morning everyone...Dorothy Parker ...congratulations on 9 months!...I am not sure I can top the banana boys! They are pretty amazing...
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Old 10-03-2013, 05:36 AM   #493 (permalink)
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Urge surfing can work for fear too Courage?

D
What's Urge Surfing?
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Old 10-03-2013, 05:50 AM   #494 (permalink)
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SkyeSea

This was something posted earlier by Dee. Gives you an idea..There is also a search function in SR at the top of the page. Search 'urge surfing' and you will find some good tools for you!.

Jim


Thursday, September 06, 2007

Urge Surfing to beat addictions and cravings

A technique known as "urge surfing" which harnesses mindfulness can be helpful for people who are experiencing cravings. Originally developed as a tool to help people struggling to battle alcohol and drug addiction, urge surfing is now being used to help people with overeating, gambling, compulsive shopping, smoking and other compulsive urges.

The idea behind urge surfing is that cravings come in cycles, like waves. They grow in intensity, before crashing and losing their power. By delaying gratification, and taking time to identify your thoughts, feelings and physical sensations at the time, coupled with learning to sit comfortably with your urges you can learn to let them go, and not act on them.

I often find that people confuse urge surfing with simply sitting on their hands and waiting for the cravings to pass. While delaying action can help some people, urge surfing is a more proactive approach that involves listening to your mind, heart and body. For example, where do you notice the craving on a physical level? Are you feeling tension in your shoulders or a gnawing feeling in your stomach? How does your mouth feel? What thoughts are you experiencing? Notice those thoughts and observe them calmly. Keep breathing calmly and steadily and let the thoughts pass through your mind like a video or audio reel.

Instead of battling the urge (or wave) ride it out and wait for it to crash and for cravings to disappear. When you give in to the urge, and give yourself the "fix" you crave, it only increases future cravings. By learning to ride the wave and let it go, over time you will notice cravings are less frequent.

This is a technique that takes time and patience, but if you're prepared to invest the time, it can pay big dividends. The catch is that most people find that the urge to smoke, drink, eat or gamble is so strong, that they forget that this tool is available to them. One good way to get in the habit of using mindfulness to combat cravings is to practise meditation or mindfulness daily, even if only for 30 seconds.

Any time I mention meditation or mindfulness in my workshops, the majority of the students get a glazed look in their eyes, and start fidgeting and complaining that they can't sit still for that long, let alone keep their thoughts focused on candles, mantras or clearing obsessive thoughts. My solution is to start with small achievable goals.

Most practitioners recommend spending 20 minutes a day in meditation. However, for the purposes of beating cravings 30 seconds may be all you need to stop your thought process and reorient your thinking into a more healthy pursuit. Urge surfing can also be adapted to help people with panic attacks or any form of obsessive thoughts. When you have compulsions or cravings, you need a way to interrupt your thoughts before you take action. Mindfulness, or urge surfing, can achieve exactly that.
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Old 10-03-2013, 05:51 AM   #495 (permalink)
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Hi, Undies!

You've obviously decided to hit a posting record here, I can't catch up with your sprinting speed!

Dorothy - congrats on 9 months!!! Great achievement! I understand you perfectly that all this financial and job instability may evoke thoughts about having "just a glass of wine", but it's just wicked logic of AV! Stay strong)

Grace - enjoy the sunshine and your great vacations!

DG - I absolutely agree that sugar is somewhat like alcohol. At least for me - I can't moderate it either.

Stevie - I won't be surprised if your management will set 25-hours shift a day for you. I love this tales about "short staffed". Aha. Any news about your promotion? Take care of yourself.

Jim - how's the AV behaving?

My best best wishes to all the Undies!

See you)
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Old 10-03-2013, 05:51 AM   #496 (permalink)
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SkyeSea...PS ...welcome to SR and the under one year thread!

Jim
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Old 10-03-2013, 06:31 AM   #497 (permalink)
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Hi again Thusday F'undies

Just had lunch, now back round the pool. I have to keep prodding the other half because he keeps doing some really loud snores much to everyone's amusement, lol. We went for a walk to the Marina this morning to look at the boats, my life there is some money there, you should see some of them, they must have cost millions. Oh how the other half live!

D.p glad you like my Japanese proverb, very apt I thought.

I'm enjoying the rest CTRL thank you, just what I needed.

Thanks Jim, I'm doing all the recharging I can, I'm not used to just sitting around and being waited on though, it doesn't come naturally believe me, but I'm giving it my best shot.X!

B.f. Thanks, I remember that feeling of never ending tiredness well, I used to feel so tired that I never thought I would make it though the day. It does pass and though this may sound ripdiculous, exercise really does boost your energy levels, even a short brisk walk can make you feel better both physically and mentally. Another thing to think about too though is that you could possibly be a little annaemic and it may be worth getting a blood test done. We neglect ourselves when we drink and deny our bodies of many nutrients we need with all the empty calories we drink in alcohol.

Gxx
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Old 10-03-2013, 06:34 AM   #498 (permalink)
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69 days today.
Thank goodness for the sober time clock.
Although I do believe the heart beat count is off by a few.
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Old 10-03-2013, 06:57 AM   #499 (permalink)
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Sierra (( )) welcome back. I can relate so much to what's happened. I admire you for coming back and starting again, I really do, if only I'd have had the fortitude to come back sooner after I relapsed I might not have gotten myself In the mess I was in.
I'm sorry about what happened with your husband and I hope things can be worked out. Understandably he is very angry and feels let down right now, but the fact that he went looking for you and took you home shows that he does care about you.
I found out the hard way and learnt from experience that actions speak louder than words.I've had to work very hard at building up the trust again, still working at it to be honest. All the sorries in the world mean nothing, sorry is just a word to my O.H, he heard one too many so now I'm showing him. My heart goes out to you and I wish you all the love in the world. Never give up.xxx
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Old 10-03-2013, 07:25 AM   #500 (permalink)
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Congrats IWLSAST!

Skye - mindfulness is a powerful tool. It helps not just with our drinking but becoming who we intend to be.
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