PippoRossi

Hi, everyone. Just a quick check in for the day. Been very busy at work today, which is good. My boss got back from a business trip to Chicago and brought me a huge bag of cheese and caramel Garrett Popcorn. It is sooooo good! Now, I need to go home and pack a nice lunch for my day hike tomorrow. It will be our last hike before climbing that huge mountain next week. Still freaking out over that. Anyway, I hope to check in later tomorrow afternoon. Have a great evening!

Grace2

Hi Pippo

Sounds like you had a good day. Cheese and caramel, urgghh that sounds awful, lol, I bet its scrumptious though. Enjoy your day tomorrow and take care.

Gxx

HappyDestiny3

12 hours done today.. Got to rest up , probably 15 tomorrow, well later today... 1:30 am and I am home.. Another wedding tomorrow. C ya later gang...

tootsl1

Hi all
Yes Grace hubby home and for a long weekend, so AV gone into remission! By the time hubby goes back I'll be ready for it

Talking thunder storms at sea I remember watching one off the coast of Turkey, moved turn over the sea and then back in right over the top of us. Such an amazing light and sound show!
DP in my hubby's line of work he often gets contacted about fantastic sounding jobs that then never materialise, I understand your frustration. I hope something comes up soon.

PippoRossi you will be fine! Ben Nevis is about the same height as the one you are doing, and if an unfit obpverweight middle aged couple with a hangover can make it... I want no excuses!!! Lol

Grace, my dad doesn't do much now, and mum feels she needs to stay close to home, I swear if she didn't have her golf she would go mad. Fortunately she doesn't need to oversee him, so she does get to escape regularly. Has your brother gone back now then? I am sorry if you said, I lose track!

Carlos, hope you enjoyed your golf yesterday, we only played 9 holes, the course was crowded and it was so humid and clammy we were wilting!

HD I hope work goes well, and take care going home.

Have a great weekend all

DG0409

Day 38 no weed and day 138 no alcohol here. My days really are starting to add up.

I'm still a bit sick, but feeling mostly better. Thought I was better Thursday night, but wasn't really. What a useless week... I spent most of it in bed and now have a giant stack of work I'm behind on. Oh well, hoping to get the rest of the way better this weekend and hit it hard next week.

I finally came up with a plan/commitment for the caffeine bit. Going for 1 cup a day for the next week and then cutting it out entirely. So, we'll see how that goes. I figure once I tell everybody I'm doing it I gotta stick to it.

Hope everyone has a good sober Saturday.

Grace2

13.09 Saturday

Hello my lovely Undies

Here's wishing you all a good and sober Saturday. It's a very gloomy, grey day here and looks as though the heavens may open at any minute. My husband is off this weekend so we've got some time together for a change. Just talked him into taking us out for dinner later. Yay.

HD, that's an awful lot of hours, your getting as bad as our Steve. I think your job is probably more enjoyable than his though.

Hi Toots, I know you'll be ready to kick it into touch. I keep meaning to ask you, what is the 'keeper of the necklaces' all about above your avatar?
Turkey, I love Turkey, I think it's my best favourite place to go on holiday!
No my brother hasn't gone back to Thailand yet, he's looking at going on October and then coming back for a few weeks at Christmas. We're hoping to get away for a week, maybe the first week of October before he goes, I could do with a break. I'm hoping to book something maybe this weekend.
Enjoy your weekend with your husband, I hope you've got something good planned.

Going to make some lunch now.

Back later hopefully

Gxx

************

JUST FOR TODAY, I will accept what is. I will face reality. I will correct those things I can correct and accept those I cannot.

soberjim

Morning all....DG..I can relate...I crawled into bed last night like a slug and slept 11 hours....Feeling somewhat better today...Am going to take it was today and tomorrow....batteries are very low.....The silver lining is feeling this miserable has made my av hid under a rock....

Morning Grace..bad weather? it is nice and sunny here will fall in the air.....it was really cool her this morning although Jimmy the Greyhound is liking the lower temps...Enjoy the week end with you OH...maybe a nice meal together!

Jim

dorothyparker

oh no, I had written a HUGE post. and it vanished. Grace, how frustrating. Now I know how you feel. I had copy-pasted it but then, I had also copied the link for refreshing so byt he time I copied my "post", it was only this link I copied. Merde merde.

I was just saying hello quickly. Said a quick note to HD re. weddings and how many drunks she must see. I related a very embarrassing drunk and bloodied wedding story in 2002 that should have been the EVENT that made me stop but now I carried on until 2012.

Toots, thank you for your comment abotu your husband. I work in TV and I've even seen a production cancelled on first day of photography so yes, it's a crazy world but the only one I'm really good in. And when a contract comes, it usually pays for my whole year, it's the waiting in between that drives me up the wall, and this year, it's the longest at 5 months. So yes something WILL COME UP. fingers crossed bec. my savings are gone now and I've applied to silly jobs but even at Enterprise (the rental cal company) won,t take me. My experience is too much in writing (in french, that's why you'll see me make mistakes in English, my 2nd language) and communications.

I'm going off to a picnic with a bunch of epicureans and epicureans white wines. Wish me luck. I'd love love love to join in but I'll have to make do with my epicurean truffles. Carlos, I'll think of your story so I can't tell myselg: go on, it's only one glass.

See you all later, Hope this posts this time.

DG0409

Grace- always good to see you!

SJ- Hope you get to feeling better.

DP- I never would have guessed English was your second language... I've seen native speakers with less of a command of the language.

MidnightBlue

Hi, Undies) Hope everyone's having a good sober Saturday.

I feel low, but, it's getting somewhat usual to me. Nothing new.

I've just made some grocery shopping - water, veggies, eggs for breakfast. There was a queue at the cashier, and the man before me was buying some instant noodles and wine. Where I live they don't sell any alcohol after 9 p.m. till 11 a.m (even non-alco beer, since it contains some tiny amount of alcohol), and it was just about ten minutes past 9, so he was late. My, he was freaking out. I could so distinctly read this despair on his face that he's just lost his "best friend" for the evening. His runaway from reality, his joy of life. I understand him so well - I just remember how about a year ago I once missed the time and had to leave the wine at the cashier.

So great I broke from this prison and gained my freedom.

Though I seem to break just from one cell in my inner prison, and there are endless walls to put down on my way to real freedom.

My best wishes to all.

Have a great weekend)

tootsl1

Hi all isn't a quick one, grace, keeper of the necklaces, long story short on the class of march thread, we found we all seemed to collect different thing, shoes, handbags, my 'thing' is necklaces! Not terribly exciting. Perhaps I should have thought of a more exotic story!
I hope you manage to get a beak, you deserve it.

SJ poor thing, I do hope it isn't man flu you have? It is sooo much worse than the regular ariety we women catch! Lol
DG glad you are feeling better, but don't rush to do too much too soon. Good luck with the coffee reduction, I'm sure you will kick coffee into touch the way you have everything else!
MB, oddly I had a similar experience an hour ago! I told hubby, and he said 'how could you tell' I held back on saying it was like looking in a mirror, just said I recognised the look!

Oh DP, more words floating around the ether! I too would never have realised English wasn't your first language you writes it beterer than wot I do!! I take it you have looked into translating jobs? My aunt is a retired doctor, who works on a lot of French papers, constantly having to translate them I'm sure there are others out there not as capable as her. Or could you do private lessons? ( though be careful how you word any adverts! 'French lessons ' used to be a euphemism for something very, very different!!
On an aside, DP, I may be asking you for some advice re New York, there is a slim possibility hubby may be offered work out there for a while, so would need to know where to look for an apartment and where to avoid! I think work would be Long Island/Queens area initially. Will let you know if it ever comes up!

walkingwithgod

Hi folks checking in on day 151. I'm in Vermont visiting my parents with my daughter. I don't start my new job until 9/03 so we did a daddy/daughter road trip. I wish my wife was here.

Once again thanks for all the support this month. I can wait to start my career at this new company. Being sober gives me hope and courage.

melivinsober

wwg so glad you have a job.

Grace thanks. :] i appreciate it. The only thing is that I really need health insurance. I wouldn't qualify for the governmental health plan because my state stopped giving it to single individuals with no kids. :/ I take monthly meds and would like to visit a psychiatrist. :/ it's too much money without it. *sigh* I was considering taking one class... but I've been putting this off for so long. I really want to go back to school... I've been thinking about it a lot. I think I'll go to class, and decide if I like the teacher.... I will let that make my decision. :P the teacher is very important to me.

Hd, thanks feeling a little better. had a full duvet weekend.

Toots, I feel for the situation. I am doing this sobriety thing for me, but my loved ones are a big inspiration to keep it going. Like you said about your husband. That's always whats on my mind when I have a really strong urge. 'What would my bf think?' *hugs* Hang in there my friend :]

DG, I was having quams with taking meds too. I finally did, but not before making my self seriously sick. Take care of yourself (advice I did not apply for myself) ugh.

guess i'm ok. had a fight with my mom. I don't think it made sense but I had really strong feelings about a complicated situation., And I know that my reaction was irrational, but it stemmed from real deep emotions. I'm going to try to explain it, but it won't make sense. She is going to have surgery and I was asking what it entailed. She got frustrated and started yelling at me that she didn't know. :/ then that's when she told me she was letting my drug-addict brother with many anger issues have disciplinary rights/control over (who I call) my little brother and sister but are Biologically his children. They were adopted by my mother when I was 13. Yes same brother that's been going to the aa meeting with me. He lost rights long ago. Now that he's trying, apparently he's good enough to take over dad duties 11 years later. My issue is that I gave so much of my time, all of my teen years, to help my single mother take care of those children. When I moved out she told me that I had no authority over them and I couldn't so much as tell them to do their homework. I was practically their mother. They only saw my mom for 3 hours a day. and once she was sick for a month in the hospital and only I was there. I took it personal. Yes I get that he is biologically the father. I don't feel like he earned the right. and the other point is that my mom can do what she wants. He isn't abusing them... physically anyway. probably mentally and verbally. Why do I say this? because he did it to me when I was their age. Yeah my older brother is now even older, but has not changed very much in a better sense. *sigh* My mom is really pissed at me... and I don't know if I'm even sorry about it.

Thanks for letting me rant. I needed to get this out of my head. I wish I knew what "normal" meant sometimes. Won't drink over it though. Can't. Want to... But can't.

Have a sober saturday all. *hugs* love you all.

dorothyparker

Hey Toots, you should look into Williamsburg in Brooklyn (The Graham station on the L line), Park Slope in Brooklyn too, and some places in Manhattan on the high Upper West Side are quite reasonable too. But furnished sublets are not cheap and don't go with a broker, it's too tedious. Let me know if it happens, and we can talk privately.

Translation contracts is exactly what I'm doing at the moment to survive. I adapt
French versions to English at the moment and it's very poorly paid but at least it pays for food.

You guys, I had intense cravings today at my country brunch. Nobody drank and that weirdly made it worse. Well I don't really know, perhaps it would have been bad had they been drinking. There was something about the twilight and subsequent sunset that made me yearn so much for a glass of white wine. It's this romantic idea again. MUST MUST MUST always remember that it's never ever just one glass of wine but a whole bottle and perhaps even another half from another bottle until I fall asleep. ;(

MelivinSober, it must be disheartening not to have your mother acknowledge what an important presence you've been for these kids. It looks like a every entangled situation so I won't venture giving any advice other than to let the children know how much you love them and that they can depend on you.

MB, here's a virtual hug for you (**}) , hoping you will feel a bit less low.

Thank you DG and others for letting me know my English is not too bad.

dorothyparker

oups, my hug emoticon didn't quite turn out the way I expected it too. LOL.

let me try this
(>^-^)><(^-^<)

or this
><

>^-^<

did it work?

tootsl1

Mel that's a tough one sweetie, I can read in your words that you are worrid about who is going to be influencing these kids. First what ages are they? Are they aware of the complexities of the situation? How well grounded are they?

All of these factors will affect the amount of influence your brother is able to have over them. Keep in mind that we are all different, your 'siblings' may well be better able to cope with your brothers behaviour that you were. Or not. You are better placed to judge that that anyone. Also is there a way you can remain a support in their lives? Do they know they can come to you if they are troubled?
Like DP I am not in a position to advise, and sometimes awful as it is, you just have to watch from the sidelines.
I feel for you. You say you have no authority over them, but as long as you have contact, you also have an affect on their behaviour. My step daughter was 18 when I met her, I had no influence on her growing up, and no authority over her as a young adult. But my husband firmly believes that by being a stable loving influence over her the last 13 years I have had a positive effect on her. So do not underestimate what you are able to do for them.

DP thanks for the pointers and I will definitely PM you if something solid comes about.

DG0409

It's day 139 no alcohol and day 39 no weed for me. Also day 2 of limiting myself to 1 cup of caffeine a day. I had a nasty headache last night when I was trying to fall asleep which I think may be related.

I've still got a bit of lingering symptoms of my sickness, but mostly better. Determined to get back at it and make today a normal day. Being too sick to engage in many of my normal recovery behaviors has been depressing. I've been thinking too much about the past and dwelling on things I'd be better off not dwelling on. I need to get back to my routine.

Melvin- I think your frustration over the situation is understandable. Unless you've seen it happen, I would think that there's at least a chance your brother isn't going to be verbally abusive towards his kids... I think it's much more common for guys to be mean to their little sisters than to their own children. And drugs and alcohol can really influence behavior, if he's clean and sober now, he might really do better. Like DP said, try to just let them know that you're there for them. They've got to be hitting their early teen years, and at that age, I think the people who influence us the most are frequently the people that DON'T have any real authority over us. It seems like the age when people start resenting/rebelling against the authority figures and trying to be 'themselves' so just try to set a good example. Just try to be their friend... it sounds like they could use one of those. And it sounds like you were a good influence on them when they were young, and that won't just disappear or anything, they'll always have that behind them.

DP- Just remember 'If you romance it, you chance it.' It's like having an abusive ex... sure he might have been good in bed, but would you go back just for that if he controlled your life, beat you until you were sick and useless the next morning, threatened to kill you and made you fear that some day he might just follow through with it? The alcohol is just the same... a few good moments, but it too controls your life, makes you sick, and might just kill you.

WWG- Way to go on 151 days!! Hope you and daughter enjoy the trip.

MB- I too am glad I don't have to worry about those alcohol cut-offs anymore. Or eating like an alcoholic... instant noodles and wine just sounds so lame now, but I'm sure I would have been happy with that or something worse to eat when I was drinking.

soberjim

I am here barely...this flu, whatever it is, is horrible...
Toots maybe it is a man flu...Just know I have not felt like this in a while...perhaps the remainder of the day will be a duvet day...
Jim

BoozeFree

Hi undies

Crawling back in. Why is it so easy for me to accept a drink when offered!? Frustrating. Took my dog on a nice long walk and decides I have to keep trying.

tootsl1

DG I'm glad you are feeling better

SJ, sending recovery hugs your way sweetie xx

BF, keep your focus on maintaining your sobriety, make yourself your new project and your main priority. X