Class of May 2013 Pt 3
Member
Join Date: May 2013
Posts: 93
Welcome Wildcat and Sober. It's good to still be getting new people in here.
Day 24 and I feel better after getting some sleep. It seems like I fluctuate between feeling like I have no time and am super stressed with all my work obligations or personal goals and being so bored and aimless. I'm looking forward to discovering some kind of middle ground. I haven't really had any strong temptations to drink for awhile, so that is refreshing. Now I think I need to focus on staying sober when I catch my AV telling me that I've been good and deserve a drink. Its easier (in some ways) to ride the momentum of initially quitting. Its just a very present and immediate goal. Now I need to transition into dealing with other goals while maintaining sobriety. I don't think I can stay at red alert forever, so I guess that's something else I need to learn - How to remember not to drink without thinking about it all the time. But then again you hear stories like Helen's coworker who still thinks about drinking 30 years later (Thanks for that story!)
Day 24 and I feel better after getting some sleep. It seems like I fluctuate between feeling like I have no time and am super stressed with all my work obligations or personal goals and being so bored and aimless. I'm looking forward to discovering some kind of middle ground. I haven't really had any strong temptations to drink for awhile, so that is refreshing. Now I think I need to focus on staying sober when I catch my AV telling me that I've been good and deserve a drink. Its easier (in some ways) to ride the momentum of initially quitting. Its just a very present and immediate goal. Now I need to transition into dealing with other goals while maintaining sobriety. I don't think I can stay at red alert forever, so I guess that's something else I need to learn - How to remember not to drink without thinking about it all the time. But then again you hear stories like Helen's coworker who still thinks about drinking 30 years later (Thanks for that story!)
Member
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Pennsylvania
Posts: 3,313
Happy Saturday all,
Day 34 and doing pretty well. Was having some temptations around 30 days, but was fine last night around some family members who were drinking. We went to our favorite little Italian place for dinner. It is BYOB so hubby, mom and brother shared a bottle of red wine (yum). Sister-in-law, who is pregnant, didn't drink so that helped. I was actually able to enjoy the food for once. Usually I would be more concerned with drinking as much wine as possible and then not really eating much. I am finding that I am eating much more, and craving sweets, now that I am no longer drinking. But that has to be better than 8 glasses of wine a night?!
Welcome newcomers!
Krodos, best of luck today at the wedding. You can do this - keep thinking about how good you will feel tomorrow morning. Let us know how it goes!
I also feel like we are missing a few May-tees? Hope they are doing OK?
Day 34 and doing pretty well. Was having some temptations around 30 days, but was fine last night around some family members who were drinking. We went to our favorite little Italian place for dinner. It is BYOB so hubby, mom and brother shared a bottle of red wine (yum). Sister-in-law, who is pregnant, didn't drink so that helped. I was actually able to enjoy the food for once. Usually I would be more concerned with drinking as much wine as possible and then not really eating much. I am finding that I am eating much more, and craving sweets, now that I am no longer drinking. But that has to be better than 8 glasses of wine a night?!
Welcome newcomers!
Krodos, best of luck today at the wedding. You can do this - keep thinking about how good you will feel tomorrow morning. Let us know how it goes!
I also feel like we are missing a few May-tees? Hope they are doing OK?
Member
Join Date: May 2013
Location: West Side
Posts: 30
thanks for the welcome everyone. today is day 14 off opiates so tomorrow will be 2 whole weeks since using. doesnt seem like much (even to me) but in the last 4-5 years ive probably only been clean this long a handful of times. this forum has been a tremendous help. ive known about the forums for quite a few years but never took to posting/reading daily while quitting before.
well thanks for being here everyone and have a great weekend!
well thanks for being here everyone and have a great weekend!
OX
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Upper Left USA
Posts: 630
Today, interesting about that Candida PAWS link. I've been taking an anti candida supplement and seems to help especially with cravings for alcohol. I believe the gut flora and bacteria can play a big role in a person's health. I have heard of studies where they take a thin persons bacteria and put it into an obese person's colon and the person gets thinner and healthy. I've been doing really well but also don't want to worry about missing a pill thinking I'll fall off the wagon. Plus side effect for some is fatigue and I have been complaining about that. So I'm going off at 3weeks sober figure 21 days to make a habit...
Man sober days are longer! Anyway just my experience. Best of luck to all.
Cutting down on coffee and pushing up mindfulness
Man sober days are longer! Anyway just my experience. Best of luck to all.
Cutting down on coffee and pushing up mindfulness
Member
Join Date: May 2013
Location: USA
Posts: 53
BigShoe and Today, I find that interesting too. I actually find when I'm doing well on a low carb diet I don't crave alcohol near as much. I actually was going to post that. And then my friend mentioned to me how at every AA meeting there's always a pile of sweets, cookies, cakes, etc... Hmmmmmmm.....
I am on a mad cleaning binge today. No way I could do this hung over. I actually cancelled my maid service because I'm now cleaning my house myself. Which is saving me another $200 a month in addition to what I'm not spending on alcohol! I realize that the only reason I've had maid service in the past has been because I've been drinking too much and needed someone else to do it for me. Not any more.
I am on a mad cleaning binge today. No way I could do this hung over. I actually cancelled my maid service because I'm now cleaning my house myself. Which is saving me another $200 a month in addition to what I'm not spending on alcohol! I realize that the only reason I've had maid service in the past has been because I've been drinking too much and needed someone else to do it for me. Not any more.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Los Angeles CA
Posts: 7
Hello everyone. My last drink was 5-30-13 so i guess I'm on my 8th day without a drink. It was easier when i was loaded up on the detox meds. the day after that was over i actually crawled around on the floor looking for a pill i could have dropped. thats not normal. Im not wanting to drink but i sure am missing not feeling anything. Im actually clean now and my brain is not happy. I acquired a lot of medical issues from my drinking. Obesity, dangerously high blood pressure, sleep apnea and a bunch of other junk. Its like i just realized how old and messed up ive become.
Ill be returning to work on Monday and for the 1st time im looking forward to that. I know that i will wake up that day without shaking and dry-heaving. Ill be starting my group sessions after work next week as well. Im nervous about that because i feel nervous around people i dont know.
I dont feel much passion for life right now. I need to make myself get out with the family and at the least pretend that I'm enjoying it. Everone says in time i will. I see those people jogging and biking around the lake. sitting with friends at coffee bean and laughing. it seems so foreign to me.
I know it will get better if i dont drink. Thanks for reading and thanks for allowing me to see that i am not alone.
Ill be returning to work on Monday and for the 1st time im looking forward to that. I know that i will wake up that day without shaking and dry-heaving. Ill be starting my group sessions after work next week as well. Im nervous about that because i feel nervous around people i dont know.
I dont feel much passion for life right now. I need to make myself get out with the family and at the least pretend that I'm enjoying it. Everone says in time i will. I see those people jogging and biking around the lake. sitting with friends at coffee bean and laughing. it seems so foreign to me.
I know it will get better if i dont drink. Thanks for reading and thanks for allowing me to see that i am not alone.
Member
Join Date: May 2013
Location: rural bush Alaska
Posts: 122
Welcome Yankle!
Yes, it does get better. The first few days (weeks) are extremely tough. But eventually, things do even out (and as I've witnessed- blood pressure can go down!). It's a bit early for you, but eventually you can adjust to doing new activities to fill in the time getting drunk left you, and feel much better for it.
Welcome to SR!
Yes, it does get better. The first few days (weeks) are extremely tough. But eventually, things do even out (and as I've witnessed- blood pressure can go down!). It's a bit early for you, but eventually you can adjust to doing new activities to fill in the time getting drunk left you, and feel much better for it.
Welcome to SR!
Member
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Pennsylvania
Posts: 3,313
Welcome, Yankle! I used to live right outside of LA (Woodland Hills). The first 10 days were the toughest for me. They say you really won't see significant improvement until after 90 days, though, so hope is there and I truly believe it will all be worth it. Otherwise, all of these wonderful, happy sober people wouldn't stay sober, right?
Had kind of a weird night. Came home from being out with my family all day and was just downright exhausted and cranky. Just wanted to crawl into bed at 7:30pm. Hubby went outside to smoke a cigar and have a scotch (yuck) and I sat inside glued to SR. Sort of felt "left out" since I wasn't out there with him having a glass of wine. Basically just started feeling sorry for myself and depressed thinking we are drifting apart now that I'm not drinking, blah, blah, blah. Anyway, got over it and tried to go to bed, but now it is 12:40am and I am here, wide awake. Mind is just all over the place tonight and I actually started thinking (just for a second) that maybe I should just start drinking again? I just don't feel "fun" anymore. However, how much fun was I when I was sneaking drinks, hiding bottles and lying everyday? Sigh. This is just so hard and I can't wait to be "normal" again. Off to bed now, hopefully.
Hope everyone is having a good weekend and staying strong. I know it will all be worth it. We just have to be patient
Had kind of a weird night. Came home from being out with my family all day and was just downright exhausted and cranky. Just wanted to crawl into bed at 7:30pm. Hubby went outside to smoke a cigar and have a scotch (yuck) and I sat inside glued to SR. Sort of felt "left out" since I wasn't out there with him having a glass of wine. Basically just started feeling sorry for myself and depressed thinking we are drifting apart now that I'm not drinking, blah, blah, blah. Anyway, got over it and tried to go to bed, but now it is 12:40am and I am here, wide awake. Mind is just all over the place tonight and I actually started thinking (just for a second) that maybe I should just start drinking again? I just don't feel "fun" anymore. However, how much fun was I when I was sneaking drinks, hiding bottles and lying everyday? Sigh. This is just so hard and I can't wait to be "normal" again. Off to bed now, hopefully.
Hope everyone is having a good weekend and staying strong. I know it will all be worth it. We just have to be patient
Member
Join Date: May 2013
Location: USA
Posts: 53
Hi LadyBug, maybe ask your husband which "you" he prefers? His answer may help you. I go through the same thing, I always felt drinking allowed me to loosen up and be more fun, or have more meaningful conversations. And if I could stop at two drinks, sure. But I can't. And being loosened up quickly turns to a hot mess. The worst fights I've ever had with my husband were when I was drinking, over the dumbest things. That wasn't good for our marriage at all! My husband prefers me to not be that hot mess and he's really supportive. He's a huge motivator in my life.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: North Carolina
Posts: 160
Day 28 today. I've been at the beach with my family for the last 4 nights. It's the same beach I've been coming to for the last 6 years with my siblings - without our respective families. One of my siblings could not make it this year since he is battling legal issues ALL related to drinking. How ironic. Since the hotel was booked well in advance and we couldn't get a refund, my family has used the place instead this year.
This is the first year at the beach I haven't been smashed out of my mind each and every day and night. While walking the beach alone yesterday and watching all the activity and people, I suddenly realized that most of my adult life (30 years) has been spent in a mind altering alcohol-induced state of mind.
Before my sobriety, I would have NEVER visited the beach, played golf this past Wednesday, and played tennis earlier last week without drinking.
I'm embarrassed that I have been wasting life's experiences in such a manner. It saddens me that I would have let this happen.
My wife totally supports my abstinence, although she is still drinking but not nearly as much since I stopped.
Trying hard to live the next half of my life alcohol free. I figured my constant thoughts of alcohol would subside over time but since reading the previous posts, perhaps those thoughts will be with me forever. Wow! Is this going to be hard or what?
Thanks folks! Be good.
This is the first year at the beach I haven't been smashed out of my mind each and every day and night. While walking the beach alone yesterday and watching all the activity and people, I suddenly realized that most of my adult life (30 years) has been spent in a mind altering alcohol-induced state of mind.
Before my sobriety, I would have NEVER visited the beach, played golf this past Wednesday, and played tennis earlier last week without drinking.
I'm embarrassed that I have been wasting life's experiences in such a manner. It saddens me that I would have let this happen.
My wife totally supports my abstinence, although she is still drinking but not nearly as much since I stopped.
Trying hard to live the next half of my life alcohol free. I figured my constant thoughts of alcohol would subside over time but since reading the previous posts, perhaps those thoughts will be with me forever. Wow! Is this going to be hard or what?
Thanks folks! Be good.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Southern Ontario
Posts: 109
Day 35
Thanks ladybug and Dee for the support! I made it.
I was at the wedding reception for 4 hours. It was my wife's cousin's wedding. I didn't know a lot of people and we were at a table where I didn't know anybody at all. I'm a rather shy/quiet person around people I don't know(big reason why I started drinking when I was younger.. to loosen up and have fun) so I have to say that I was actually pretty bored most of the time... they were JUST starting the dancing when we left.. 4 hours for dinner and speeches, that seemed excessive to me.
Good news is that it wasn't very difficult not to drink even though I was watching many around me do so. Only my mother in law asked me about it as she likes to drink and I just said "I'm not drinking".
SR and the good people here who share their stories and thoughts is how I have been able to do this so big thank you to all!
Thanks ladybug and Dee for the support!
I made it. I was at the wedding reception for 4 hours. It was my wife's cousin's wedding. I didn't know a lot of people and we were at a table where I didn't know anybody at all. I'm a rather shy/quiet person around people I don't know(big reason why I started drinking when I was younger.. to loosen up and have fun) so I have to say that I was actually pretty bored most of the time... they were JUST starting the dancing when we left.. 4 hours for dinner and speeches, that seemed excessive to me.
Good news is that it wasn't very difficult not to drink even though I was watching many around me do so. Only my mother in law asked me about it as she likes to drink and I just said "I'm not drinking".
SR and the good people here who share their stories and thoughts is how I have been able to do this so big thank you to all!
Member
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Pennsylvania
Posts: 3,313
Originally Posted by RavenRenewed 
Hi LadyBug, maybe ask your husband which "you" he prefers? His answer may help you. I go through the same thing, I always felt drinking allowed me to loosen up and be more fun, or have more meaningful conversations. And if I could stop at two drinks, sure. But I can't. And being loosened up quickly turns to a hot mess. The worst fights I've ever had with my husband were when I was drinking, over the dumbest things. That wasn't good for our marriage at all! My husband prefers me to not be that hot mess and he's really supportive. He's a huge motivator in my life.
Great job, Krodos, on making it through the wedding. Huge step!!
Welcome, eshetz (fellow momma class member)
Member
Join Date: May 2013
Location: West Side
Posts: 30
welcome eshetz!
yankle: im with you in the no passion struggle. im very sluggish, very unmotivated. dont really like to be around people (as bad as that sounds) but have been doing so for work/family. kinda feeling like ill never get better. but then this just happened...
im sitting on my patio at 5am after another sleepless night and while reading an inspirational post in the Substance Abuse forums, my mind jumps to paragliding which i just tried for the first time recently. and just for a minute or so, i felt excited and determined and PASSIONATE (which i havent felt ini a long time). really gave me hope.
as ive read on here so many times, we cant wait to get better, we have to MAKE our lives better. and i put that in just as a reminder, because its definitely not something ive been able to accomplish yet either but i am working on it.
yankle: im with you in the no passion struggle. im very sluggish, very unmotivated. dont really like to be around people (as bad as that sounds) but have been doing so for work/family. kinda feeling like ill never get better. but then this just happened...
im sitting on my patio at 5am after another sleepless night and while reading an inspirational post in the Substance Abuse forums, my mind jumps to paragliding which i just tried for the first time recently. and just for a minute or so, i felt excited and determined and PASSIONATE (which i havent felt ini a long time). really gave me hope.
as ive read on here so many times, we cant wait to get better, we have to MAKE our lives better. and i put that in just as a reminder, because its definitely not something ive been able to accomplish yet either but i am working on it.
Member
Join Date: May 2013
Location: rural bush Alaska
Posts: 122
Of course you can join us, Eshetz! Welcome back to sobriety!
Sober, absolutely agree- you can't just start counting the days and hope it gets better. If you don't change anything except not drinking, you won't get better. I'm still in the phase of wondering just what I need to do to change my life to make it better, but I know if I just rely on time, not much will happen.
Sober, absolutely agree- you can't just start counting the days and hope it gets better. If you don't change anything except not drinking, you won't get better. I'm still in the phase of wondering just what I need to do to change my life to make it better, but I know if I just rely on time, not much will happen.
Member
Join Date: May 2013
Location: Pennsylvania
Posts: 134
Hi Gang,
Well, back from a conference in Vegas last week. I didn't fair so well, though. I had a couple of drinks during a few dinner meetings. It was a good trip, though I had not been looking forward the meeting for many weeks. I think the timing was bad...Nevertheless, I'd like to check back in with all of you since we shared a lot. I'm off to the June Class, but I will drop in regularly.
I have some things to figure out though. These last 30 days seemed a bit backwards to me....didn't have the level of confidence I've had in the past?
And especially .....Congratulations to everyone for doing such a great job...I'm jealous!!
Stay strong May-tees......Br, TBML
Well, back from a conference in Vegas last week. I didn't fair so well, though. I had a couple of drinks during a few dinner meetings. It was a good trip, though I had not been looking forward the meeting for many weeks. I think the timing was bad...Nevertheless, I'd like to check back in with all of you since we shared a lot. I'm off to the June Class, but I will drop in regularly.
I have some things to figure out though. These last 30 days seemed a bit backwards to me....didn't have the level of confidence I've had in the past?
And especially .....Congratulations to everyone for doing such a great job...I'm jealous!!
Stay strong May-tees......Br, TBML
Administrator
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,414
I think every recovery attempt is different TBML...I know the more attempts I had the less I had that bright eyed and busy tailed thing going on....
Didn't make a difference in the end tho - I stayed the course, trudged a little, and got my shiny eyes back eventually - I know you will too
D
Didn't make a difference in the end tho - I stayed the course, trudged a little, and got my shiny eyes back eventually - I know you will too
D
Member
Join Date: May 2013
Location: Pennsylvania
Posts: 134
Originally Posted by Dee74
I think every recovery attempt is different TBML...I know the more attempts I had the less I had that bright eyed and busy tailed thing going on....
Didn't make a difference in the end tho - I stayed the course, trudged a little, and got my shiny eyes back eventually - I know you will too
D
Didn't make a difference in the end tho - I stayed the course, trudged a little, and got my shiny eyes back eventually - I know you will too
D
I plan to take that path too. I will move forward. And I have to be honest when I say that this is first time I am moving in the right direction so quickly. In that past, I let shame and failure drag me backwards.
I think that is somewhat a key in this. Typically, I would try, but eventually forget my positive progress. Today, I can feel the accomplishments from the last month and ride that again.
That is why this site Rocks!....I read everyone's comments along with my own from the past two weeks. I felt like I knew where I was before. That is new for me.
So, thanks again, for your kind words for wisdom!
Br, TBML
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