Class of April 2013 Part 4
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Class of April 2013 Part 4
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Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Kansas City
Posts: 2,294
Congrats on 33 DG. I am planning on a weekend where I can pretty much do as I want. Kind of nice sometimes. And since I won't be spending 3/4 of it smashed, it will be even better. Now only if the weather would be more May like than March.....
Member
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: The South Pacific
Posts: 306
Up faaaar too early. BDog decided to get the weekend going early.
Coffee is on, and I've turned the lights on over my desk. It sure looks lonely in there...especially now that I'm perusing shows in the DVR.
Lots planned today.
I will check on before we get moving, for now some cartoons and coffee.
Blue Dog would like you to know this sector is gecko free. Carry on.
Coffee is on, and I've turned the lights on over my desk. It sure looks lonely in there...especially now that I'm perusing shows in the DVR.
Lots planned today.
I will check on before we get moving, for now some cartoons and coffee.
Blue Dog would like you to know this sector is gecko free. Carry on.
capra laeviculus
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: German Village, OH
Posts: 3,427
Hey hey, checkin' in on part 4 
Hope everyone's well!
I had a very busy week, and finally I'm back on the road towards home.
Went to an interesting meeting yesterday, across the street (ish) from Harvard Yard in Cambridge, MA. Lots of student-age kids there. It was nice to see people getting a jump on this disease.
Hope everyone's well!I had a very busy week, and finally I'm back on the road towards home.
Went to an interesting meeting yesterday, across the street (ish) from Harvard Yard in Cambridge, MA. Lots of student-age kids there. It was nice to see people getting a jump on this disease.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Northeast, US
Posts: 2,073
Hey guys. I'm doing ok. Not a lot done here, but I got out and went to Home Depot for some things I needed. Also brought my mother a big bouquet of flowers and helped my father with some stuff around the house. His attitude towards me is decidedly different in the last week. It has been a tough relationship, he cannot fathom what depression is. In the last week I have been way more upbeat and he's noticed.
Well, I haven't started moving along, but it is 17 days for me. I'll be at 3 weeks soon enough. At least I am not out risking my life, half in the bag, trying to have fun. Things can only get better. I am craving cigarettes but not alcohol at all, and I know that a cigarette would make me sick and give me an anxiety attack, so I am still avoiding them. The cravings for cigs are worse today on day 11 than they have been yet. Whatever.
I will get on some lists. I must write lists, not do them on the computer.
Well, I haven't started moving along, but it is 17 days for me. I'll be at 3 weeks soon enough. At least I am not out risking my life, half in the bag, trying to have fun. Things can only get better. I am craving cigarettes but not alcohol at all, and I know that a cigarette would make me sick and give me an anxiety attack, so I am still avoiding them. The cravings for cigs are worse today on day 11 than they have been yet. Whatever.
I will get on some lists. I must write lists, not do them on the computer.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2013
Posts: 5,439
Drake- Thank you. Your weekend sounds nice. Enjoy! And I'm with you on it being better not spending most of it smashed and the rest hung-over or passed-out! It's been a bit rainy and windy here and I was hoping to do some yard work, but had to suffice with inside chores. :-/
Scoutie- I thought you said something about version 2 of Bandicoot yet to come... what happened to that?
Goat- it's good to see you finally bothered to come back and say 'hi' to us all...and also good to see you've grown-up enough to spend a day or two without us.. just don't grow up too much!
johnny- we didn't get ourselves into these messes in a day or two, so we can't expect to fix everything instantly. Have patience with yourself. Way to go on the 17 & 11 days!! The cravings for the cigs will get better with time... and also if you remember what you hated about them and the benefits of quitting that helps too. Be proud of yourself. Maybe think about committing to stick to it as long as it takes to get to where you want to be. Drinking over the house not being clean is just your AV talking. That's an OLD way of thinking. Replace it with a NEW thought of 'drinking won't make the house cleaner, it will just make it WORSE! F you AV!!'
Anyway I'm off to see if I can't get in at least a little yard work- I think maybe the weather has cleared a bit. Time to get more things done. My own house is kind of a wreck in some areas... but getting better.
Scoutie- I thought you said something about version 2 of Bandicoot yet to come... what happened to that?
Goat- it's good to see you finally bothered to come back and say 'hi' to us all...and also good to see you've grown-up enough to spend a day or two without us.. just don't grow up too much!
johnny- we didn't get ourselves into these messes in a day or two, so we can't expect to fix everything instantly. Have patience with yourself. Way to go on the 17 & 11 days!! The cravings for the cigs will get better with time... and also if you remember what you hated about them and the benefits of quitting that helps too. Be proud of yourself. Maybe think about committing to stick to it as long as it takes to get to where you want to be. Drinking over the house not being clean is just your AV talking. That's an OLD way of thinking. Replace it with a NEW thought of 'drinking won't make the house cleaner, it will just make it WORSE! F you AV!!'
Anyway I'm off to see if I can't get in at least a little yard work- I think maybe the weather has cleared a bit. Time to get more things done. My own house is kind of a wreck in some areas... but getting better.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Northeast, US
Posts: 2,073
I know, and thanks DG. It is frustrating when you feel better and can see what is wrong but nothing has changed yet. Change will come. I am very impatient. One of my many addict traits.
I went to IRON MAN III tonight. I was cool. Not for everyone, but an escape and some fun. I went by myself, which is fine. The only thing is this...'seriously, you paid 14 dollars to see this on the IMAX and you are texting for the entire film??? Distracting me with your bright iphone screen constantly. And this idiot in front of me with a blue tooth ear set that kept going off and flashing a blinding blue light. My rage is not under proper control. I was thankful that I sat 6 seats down from the person on my left, and I got up and moved down towards the center of the row. There were not many people there but everyone clustered around the best area.
I had a good time and it was nice to do something different. I think it was better because my expectations were not high. A lot of people did not like it, but I thought it was good. I ate a gallon of popcorn. Uugggghh...
I went to IRON MAN III tonight. I was cool. Not for everyone, but an escape and some fun. I went by myself, which is fine. The only thing is this...'seriously, you paid 14 dollars to see this on the IMAX and you are texting for the entire film??? Distracting me with your bright iphone screen constantly. And this idiot in front of me with a blue tooth ear set that kept going off and flashing a blinding blue light. My rage is not under proper control. I was thankful that I sat 6 seats down from the person on my left, and I got up and moved down towards the center of the row. There were not many people there but everyone clustered around the best area.
I had a good time and it was nice to do something different. I think it was better because my expectations were not high. A lot of people did not like it, but I thought it was good. I ate a gallon of popcorn. Uugggghh...
Member
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: California
Posts: 160
Ohh man, tonight's been really rough. I actually gave a second thought to having a drink, but there is no way in heck I'm breaking it after my eyes have been opened this far, especially not on day 29! I can't disappoint, I have to pick up my chip on Monday.
More feeling small and unimportant because of my husband ignoring me and disregarding my thoughts and feelings. I think that may be the worst trigger that I have. So far, I have survived it twice and I am trying to set my fears aside and be open, assertive, and honest at whatever cost because my sobriety comes first. 10 years of tangled hurtful mess from this relationship. I feel so exhausted because I got an overwhelming glance at just what a stunted overemotional mess my head is and broke down into a fit of tears. My head is pounding.
I walked to the store to get some Tylenol and the neighborhood is in FULL FORCE tonight. Gigantic party at the pool, tons of people out on their porches drinking and smoking, people buying booze upon booze at the drug store... Annoying.
On top of that, my brother has picked up smoking pot constantly throughout the day on top of his drinking. Ughh... I don't think he realizes it, but the entire living room smells like booze just from his breath.
Feel like waving a white flag around. I've had enough.
More feeling small and unimportant because of my husband ignoring me and disregarding my thoughts and feelings. I think that may be the worst trigger that I have. So far, I have survived it twice and I am trying to set my fears aside and be open, assertive, and honest at whatever cost because my sobriety comes first. 10 years of tangled hurtful mess from this relationship. I feel so exhausted because I got an overwhelming glance at just what a stunted overemotional mess my head is and broke down into a fit of tears. My head is pounding.
I walked to the store to get some Tylenol and the neighborhood is in FULL FORCE tonight. Gigantic party at the pool, tons of people out on their porches drinking and smoking, people buying booze upon booze at the drug store... Annoying.
On top of that, my brother has picked up smoking pot constantly throughout the day on top of his drinking. Ughh... I don't think he realizes it, but the entire living room smells like booze just from his breath.
Feel like waving a white flag around. I've had enough.
2 detoxes down, 0 to go
Join Date: Oct 2012
Posts: 284
Day 36 just turned into day 37. Later this morning (after some sleep, hopefully) I'll be heading to a meeting then doing the 5th Step with my sponsor. Step 4 is where I got stuck for a while before my relapse, so I guess this is good progress.
And I'm about to end, or at least redefine, a personal relationship that is causing me more stress than joy. I'm choosing to walk away from any situation that threatens my sobriety in any way. I have to put this first.
Feels pretty good to be making sober, rational, healthy choices.
And I'm about to end, or at least redefine, a personal relationship that is causing me more stress than joy. I'm choosing to walk away from any situation that threatens my sobriety in any way. I have to put this first.
Feels pretty good to be making sober, rational, healthy choices.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: London, UK
Posts: 148
Hi class,
Hope everyone is doing well. 2 weeks sober, have been a lot of ups and downs but feel more secure in my sobriety this time around.
Thought about a few things when reading through posts but when writing now I've already managed to forget most of it! Finding it a little hard to concentrate and remember things at the moment... Am very impressed with how everyone is making such great efforts confronting issues they haven't been capable of dealing with when drinking, and which they know can undermine their commitment to sobriety. Well done to all of you!
Johnny, I can absolutely relate to the "movie rage" I am sorry you had that experience but it did make me smile too - nothing makes me so upset as people being idiots in a movie theatre. Can go on about it for hours, it's as if people's annoying behaviour in that particular situation becomes a symbol of everything that is wrong in our society I have a bit of complex relationship with anger, I can get very angry but I keep it inside, bottled up, which is not healthy - to say the least. Now when I am sober I am noticing how a lot of suppressed anger is coming to the surface, and I don't know how to channel it and communicate it. Need to work on this. So I don't hit someone over the head with their phone next time I go to the cinema!
Notsolvory, I am sorry to hear about your problems and that you are struggling in your marriage. Well done for acknowledging that you need to be more assertive and open in your relationship in order to stay sober - that is a very good insight, and it takes a lot of strength and courage to do so. I have found it very hard to be assertive and open in relationships with men (and with family and friends), often letting the other person dictate who I am and say things that I do not agree with and that are hurtful, feeling I am not worthy equal attention and respect. This is something I am trying to work on now, as part of my recovery. Not valuing myself and my own integrity, placing high demands on myself while low demands on others, has been a central theme in my life and something which I believe has fuelled and been fuelled by drinking. Am having to force myself to speak up now, but am finding it is getting easier each time. It's like learning a foreign language! I hope things will get better for you.
Anotherpaul, I am encouraged reading about how you are being brave enough to deal with a problematic relationship, whether you end it or redefine it you are actively confronting the problem instead of hiding or escaping from it. I know how difficult this is, as I mention above, I really struggle with being assertive and communicating openly. Let me know how it goes.
Hugs to all of you!
Hope everyone is doing well. 2 weeks sober, have been a lot of ups and downs but feel more secure in my sobriety this time around.
Thought about a few things when reading through posts but when writing now I've already managed to forget most of it! Finding it a little hard to concentrate and remember things at the moment... Am very impressed with how everyone is making such great efforts confronting issues they haven't been capable of dealing with when drinking, and which they know can undermine their commitment to sobriety. Well done to all of you!
Johnny, I can absolutely relate to the "movie rage" I am sorry you had that experience but it did make me smile too - nothing makes me so upset as people being idiots in a movie theatre. Can go on about it for hours, it's as if people's annoying behaviour in that particular situation becomes a symbol of everything that is wrong in our society
I have a bit of complex relationship with anger, I can get very angry but I keep it inside, bottled up, which is not healthy - to say the least. Now when I am sober I am noticing how a lot of suppressed anger is coming to the surface, and I don't know how to channel it and communicate it. Need to work on this. So I don't hit someone over the head with their phone next time I go to the cinema! Notsolvory, I am sorry to hear about your problems and that you are struggling in your marriage. Well done for acknowledging that you need to be more assertive and open in your relationship in order to stay sober - that is a very good insight, and it takes a lot of strength and courage to do so. I have found it very hard to be assertive and open in relationships with men (and with family and friends), often letting the other person dictate who I am and say things that I do not agree with and that are hurtful, feeling I am not worthy equal attention and respect. This is something I am trying to work on now, as part of my recovery. Not valuing myself and my own integrity, placing high demands on myself while low demands on others, has been a central theme in my life and something which I believe has fuelled and been fuelled by drinking. Am having to force myself to speak up now, but am finding it is getting easier each time. It's like learning a foreign language! I hope things will get better for you.
Anotherpaul, I am encouraged reading about how you are being brave enough to deal with a problematic relationship, whether you end it or redefine it you are actively confronting the problem instead of hiding or escaping from it. I know how difficult this is, as I mention above, I really struggle with being assertive and communicating openly. Let me know how it goes.
Hugs to all of you!
Member
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: The South Pacific
Posts: 306
Greetings all. Just got home from a fantastic night at the World Fireknife Championship.
Was incredible. The food, the show, the culture...was awesome. My only regret was I couldn't record it, but like Johnny mentioned, wasn't gonna be THAT guy with my bright arse iPhone ruining some ones view.
Most certainly would have been a drinking night. Spent the day soaking in the culture of the different Polynesian islands, and enjoying myself.
There is fun to be had sober. Seriously really, really good fun! Not being hungover tomorrow will just be icing on the cake.
Enjoying my wife, my mom and her friend's company tonight was a serious treat for me, as I had no worries about sneaking a drink, or drinking enough to maintain a gross level of oblivion to endure what most likely would have felt too long, and interfering with my drinking. Just the opposite happened: I was totally into the show, and we were laughing and visiting, and having a good time. I imagine this is what normal people are like when enjoying life.
What the hell was wrong with me? What a gigantic waste.
The good news is: that portion of my program is over. It's my choice if I ever want to waste another day in the bottom of a bottle. I don't.
Perhaps this is a turning point for me, but rather than lament what I've wasted, I'm going to appreciate what today, and with some luck tomorrow holds.
Even a shite day will be better without booze. I'll have just a shite day, not followed by a guaranteed shite day as I drink it away, be hungover, rinse, repeat.
DG: bandicoot 2 is being re-tooled, and given proper attention. I've just not unveiled him as there are some tweaks that are wanting before I unleash him/her to the World.
In the morning I have to finish drawing my Mothers Day card as we are taking Blue Dog (and some surfboards) to the other side of the island to have a barbecue for the evening. Will be nice. There are some ribeyes that will require my attention.
G'night all, and be well.
Scout
Was incredible. The food, the show, the culture...was awesome. My only regret was I couldn't record it, but like Johnny mentioned, wasn't gonna be THAT guy with my bright arse iPhone ruining some ones view.
Most certainly would have been a drinking night. Spent the day soaking in the culture of the different Polynesian islands, and enjoying myself.
There is fun to be had sober. Seriously really, really good fun! Not being hungover tomorrow will just be icing on the cake.
Enjoying my wife, my mom and her friend's company tonight was a serious treat for me, as I had no worries about sneaking a drink, or drinking enough to maintain a gross level of oblivion to endure what most likely would have felt too long, and interfering with my drinking. Just the opposite happened: I was totally into the show, and we were laughing and visiting, and having a good time. I imagine this is what normal people are like when enjoying life.
What the hell was wrong with me? What a gigantic waste.
The good news is: that portion of my program is over. It's my choice if I ever want to waste another day in the bottom of a bottle. I don't.
Perhaps this is a turning point for me, but rather than lament what I've wasted, I'm going to appreciate what today, and with some luck tomorrow holds.
Even a shite day will be better without booze. I'll have just a shite day, not followed by a guaranteed shite day as I drink it away, be hungover, rinse, repeat.
DG: bandicoot 2 is being re-tooled, and given proper attention. I've just not unveiled him as there are some tweaks that are wanting before I unleash him/her to the World.
In the morning I have to finish drawing my Mothers Day card as we are taking Blue Dog (and some surfboards) to the other side of the island to have a barbecue for the evening. Will be nice. There are some ribeyes that will require my attention.
G'night all, and be well.
Scout
Member
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Northeast, US
Posts: 2,073
Ivory, I'm sorry about the rough time. "whatever cost because my sobriety comes first." Yes it does. It might not be a "cost" if you come out happy. 28 days is when I relapsed 2 years ago. I drank until now. Ecchhh. It does not help, we all know that.
Another Paul: 37 days? Yes!!!!
Scout: Gross level of oblivion? Fantastic.
I have someone in my life, who might have to go. It has been a very close relationship for a few years, but I cannot assume responsibility for her any longer. I have to go out and live my life. She's given me a lot of support, joy, understanding, and been a great companion. At the same time, I don't want anything holding me here. She was on a date last night, and it was a relief that she was not here. It's close platonic situation. I wish she would just be OK and I didn't have to worry about her spiraling down if I am not around. Not my problem, but I'll never turn my back on her. Why is it the crazies have the hugest, most funny, imaginations?
My movie rage was not as bad as it could have been. It IS a symbol of everything that is wrong with our society, and I did want to smash the phone. This young woman who was texting the whole time, does not even have the attention span of for Iron Man? No one is asking you to watch a 2 hour documentary on the Civil War, this is Iron Man (no pun intended). People know more about Kim Kardashian than Barack Obama. If you asked them to point out France on a totally unlabeled map they would probably point to China or Texas. I just can't take it. Yes, I know I should let things go, but I am not going to. This society is just wrong. I can be a sober social critic. I wonder what the exhistentialists would have thought of Kardashian and Reality TV in regards to their notions of The Absurd.
Signing out for now. Good luck all.
Another Paul: 37 days? Yes!!!!
Scout: Gross level of oblivion? Fantastic.
I have someone in my life, who might have to go. It has been a very close relationship for a few years, but I cannot assume responsibility for her any longer. I have to go out and live my life. She's given me a lot of support, joy, understanding, and been a great companion. At the same time, I don't want anything holding me here. She was on a date last night, and it was a relief that she was not here. It's close platonic situation. I wish she would just be OK and I didn't have to worry about her spiraling down if I am not around. Not my problem, but I'll never turn my back on her. Why is it the crazies have the hugest, most funny, imaginations?
My movie rage was not as bad as it could have been. It IS a symbol of everything that is wrong with our society, and I did want to smash the phone. This young woman who was texting the whole time, does not even have the attention span of for Iron Man? No one is asking you to watch a 2 hour documentary on the Civil War, this is Iron Man (no pun intended). People know more about Kim Kardashian than Barack Obama. If you asked them to point out France on a totally unlabeled map they would probably point to China or Texas. I just can't take it. Yes, I know I should let things go, but I am not going to. This society is just wrong. I can be a sober social critic. I wonder what the exhistentialists would have thought of Kardashian and Reality TV in regards to their notions of The Absurd.
Signing out for now. Good luck all.
Member
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Raleigh, NC
Posts: 205
Hello everyone. I am having a decent weekend so far. Finally got my arse into the gym yesterday. I need to get active again. I've gained some lbs since my last spree. All of them due to eating fast food. This has got to stop......anyway. I went with some friends for a early dinner and then a Durham Bulls ball game. Made the dinner but not the game due to the weather. Some people were drinking there but it didn't bother me because I like to drink alone. Put me alone in a room with a bottle of vodka, and I would be having a craving, around others drinking, and I feel ok.
Well, just wanted to touch base here on SR. I wish all moms a happy Mother's Day and everyone a sober and fulfilling Sunday.
Well, just wanted to touch base here on SR. I wish all moms a happy Mother's Day and everyone a sober and fulfilling Sunday.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: London, UK
Posts: 148
Hello again,
Just a quick thought, before I head out and do some gardening (discovering how soothing it is to my restless mind):
As discussed above, while annoying people in movie theatres might indeed be a symbol of all that is wrong with our society, and this particular situation can be very discouraging, there are other social contexts that make me think more positively and that seem to balance things out, like Sober Recovery.
Here we have an online forum with people from different backgrounds, which, unlike most anonymous (or non-anonymous for that matter) online forums, is not filled with passive aggressive remarks, nonconstructive criticism, stupidity and pointless self absorbed monologues. Instead, there is compassion, encouragement, insightful remarks and honest dialogue. People aren't trying to convey a false image of themselves, but acknowledge their problems or shortcomings and commit to change.
We may all have done our fair share of mistakes, bad choices and hurtful acts, but there is definitely a lot of goodness on here. I certainly wish I wasn't an alcoholic, but at the same time I am grateful to have the opportunity to engage in this genuine way with a great group of people.
Thank you for making me feel more hopeful about humanity
Just a quick thought, before I head out and do some gardening (discovering how soothing it is to my restless mind):
As discussed above, while annoying people in movie theatres might indeed be a symbol of all that is wrong with our society, and this particular situation can be very discouraging, there are other social contexts that make me think more positively and that seem to balance things out, like Sober Recovery.
Here we have an online forum with people from different backgrounds, which, unlike most anonymous (or non-anonymous for that matter) online forums, is not filled with passive aggressive remarks, nonconstructive criticism, stupidity and pointless self absorbed monologues. Instead, there is compassion, encouragement, insightful remarks and honest dialogue. People aren't trying to convey a false image of themselves, but acknowledge their problems or shortcomings and commit to change.
We may all have done our fair share of mistakes, bad choices and hurtful acts, but there is definitely a lot of goodness on here. I certainly wish I wasn't an alcoholic, but at the same time I am grateful to have the opportunity to engage in this genuine way with a great group of people.
Thank you for making me feel more hopeful about humanity
Member
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Northeast, US
Posts: 2,073
Sobreia, Those are great words. I have tried really hard not to engage in my massive self absorbed monologues .
It is very cool because of everything you said. Not a negative word from anyone, totally positive encouragement, the diverse backgrounds, nations, etc. It is unlike other online forums. It is also unlike in-person forums. I keep telling my Psychiatrist, and other people I know how great it is.
This forum has improved my level of 'appropriateness.'
Thank you to everyone. How many of us are there?
.It is very cool because of everything you said. Not a negative word from anyone, totally positive encouragement, the diverse backgrounds, nations, etc. It is unlike other online forums. It is also unlike in-person forums. I keep telling my Psychiatrist, and other people I know how great it is.
This forum has improved my level of 'appropriateness.'
Thank you to everyone. How many of us are there?
capra laeviculus
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: German Village, OH
Posts: 3,427
Happy Mother's day e'body! And special kudos to the moms on here who are sober today, you deserve an extra pat on the back and lots of praise for what you are doing today to be the best mom you can be.
The past cannot be changed, but it can be learned from to guide us through the future.
The past cannot be changed, but it can be learned from to guide us through the future.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2013
Posts: 5,439
Originally Posted by Sobreia 
Hello again,
Just a quick thought, before I head out and do some gardening (discovering how soothing it is to my restless mind):
As discussed above, while annoying people in movie theatres might indeed be a symbol of all that is wrong with our society, and this particular situation can be very discouraging, there are other social contexts that make me think more positively and that seem to balance things out, like Sober Recovery.
Here we have an online forum with people from different backgrounds, which, unlike most anonymous (or non-anonymous for that matter) online forums, is not filled with passive aggressive remarks, nonconstructive criticism, stupidity and pointless self absorbed monologues. Instead, there is compassion, encouragement, insightful remarks and honest dialogue. People aren't trying to convey a false image of themselves, but acknowledge their problems or shortcomings and commit to change.
We may all have done our fair share of mistakes, bad choices and hurtful acts, but there is definitely a lot of goodness on here. I certainly wish I wasn't an alcoholic, but at the same time I am grateful to have the opportunity to engage in this genuine way with a great group of people.
Thank you for making me feel more hopeful about humanity
Just a quick thought, before I head out and do some gardening (discovering how soothing it is to my restless mind):
As discussed above, while annoying people in movie theatres might indeed be a symbol of all that is wrong with our society, and this particular situation can be very discouraging, there are other social contexts that make me think more positively and that seem to balance things out, like Sober Recovery.
Here we have an online forum with people from different backgrounds, which, unlike most anonymous (or non-anonymous for that matter) online forums, is not filled with passive aggressive remarks, nonconstructive criticism, stupidity and pointless self absorbed monologues. Instead, there is compassion, encouragement, insightful remarks and honest dialogue. People aren't trying to convey a false image of themselves, but acknowledge their problems or shortcomings and commit to change.
We may all have done our fair share of mistakes, bad choices and hurtful acts, but there is definitely a lot of goodness on here. I certainly wish I wasn't an alcoholic, but at the same time I am grateful to have the opportunity to engage in this genuine way with a great group of people.
Thank you for making me feel more hopeful about humanity
I really love SR.
For a while I was on a relationship forum and despite the fact that everybody was there for some sort of problem, so many people lacked any sort of understanding or compassion and everybody seemed to have a 'holier than thou' sort of attitude... while trying to come across like they were good people trying to help.
I notice a huge difference here at SR... its is much more welcoming.
This place is great. Sometimes the people here make me feel like a jerk because they have such compassionate helpful things to say and the response I think of wasn't nearly that nice. I like that though, because it makes me question how I am.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2013
Posts: 141
DG - Congrats on 33 days and shotgunning the thread.
Goat - That's cool. Youngins realizing they don't have to fall down the rabbit hole too far! I almost quit when I was 19 or 20. Coulda Woulda Shoulda...
Scoutie - Looking forward to seeing the new and improved bandicoot when he's ready to make his debut. Glad you were able to enjoy the show!
NSI - Glad you were able to get through your rough patch. Picking up my 1 month chip was a mixed bag for me emotionally. On the one hand, I was so happy to have made it a month, and on the other hand, I realized that for the last month all I had done was take away my crutch, my self-medication, my "safety net." I still felt jumpy and edgy and blech. It made me feel like I had accomplished so much to get nowhere. I'm still getting over that feeling. Just be aware if you start getting that sort of vibe. As Dee said in another thread, early sobriety is different from recovery, and I think my tail spin last week was from mistaking the two.
AnotherPaul - Good luck with your relationship. That must be really hard. Good for you for working with your sponsor to find a path forward!
Sobriea - My concentration is in the toilet too. I think it's normal. Congrats on 2 weeks! I agree, for the most part, I don't see many "me monologues" on here and people seem really supportive. It's nice.
Johnny555 - UGH! I hear you on the cell phones on movies. The car in front of me yesterday threw trash out their window onto the side of the road. I wanted to write their plate number down and call the police and report them!! Just made me so angry. I just sat there breathing and eventually (mostly) let it go. I didn't write down the plate number, so it's a done deal. If I had reported them, would the cops even do anything?!?! Saying good-bye to friends is hard. My BFF the other day accused me of "going program" and abandoning her as a friend. It's her own head game and I tried my best to assure her that I'm not going anywhere, but at the same point, our friendship is really making our pity party of one a pity party of two via phone call. Now that I'm not interested in pity parties, I'm not really sure what to talk to her about. It's very strange. I'm trying hard now though, to just focus on fixing me. Later I can decide how all the people in my life are influencing me, but first I need to clear up how I am influencing me. I'm hoping once I get that cleared up, the relationships will shake out on their own. Just try and take it slow. Sounds like you're starting to feel a lot better and are jumping on a lot of stuff at once (cleaning, friendships, trip to Home Depot, seeing your dad, etc.). Maybe that's why you had so much rage over iPhone lady. Sounds like my rage over Nintendo the other day. I was literally just trying to find something external and stupid to dump my emotions on. I knew it at the time too, but it felt like safe anger somehow, so I went with it.
Got some running tops and a pitchfork (and some pjs and panties) for Mother's Day (yes, I asked for all of those things!). I'm wearing my new running top now even though I'm banned from running due to my back problem for the time being. I wore it while I did all my PT exercises. I find the whole concept of "power walking" so hideously lame, but I'm almost considering heading out. I feel like I will turn into a blob without exercise, and I need an outlet for my nervous energy. Typing to you all is at least getting out a little of it. My poor keyboard...
Happy Mother's Day Bandicoots!
Goat - That's cool. Youngins realizing they don't have to fall down the rabbit hole too far! I almost quit when I was 19 or 20. Coulda Woulda Shoulda...
Scoutie - Looking forward to seeing the new and improved bandicoot when he's ready to make his debut. Glad you were able to enjoy the show!
NSI - Glad you were able to get through your rough patch. Picking up my 1 month chip was a mixed bag for me emotionally. On the one hand, I was so happy to have made it a month, and on the other hand, I realized that for the last month all I had done was take away my crutch, my self-medication, my "safety net." I still felt jumpy and edgy and blech. It made me feel like I had accomplished so much to get nowhere. I'm still getting over that feeling. Just be aware if you start getting that sort of vibe. As Dee said in another thread, early sobriety is different from recovery, and I think my tail spin last week was from mistaking the two.
AnotherPaul - Good luck with your relationship. That must be really hard. Good for you for working with your sponsor to find a path forward!
Sobriea - My concentration is in the toilet too. I think it's normal. Congrats on 2 weeks! I agree, for the most part, I don't see many "me monologues" on here and people seem really supportive. It's nice.
Johnny555 - UGH! I hear you on the cell phones on movies. The car in front of me yesterday threw trash out their window onto the side of the road. I wanted to write their plate number down and call the police and report them!! Just made me so angry. I just sat there breathing and eventually (mostly) let it go. I didn't write down the plate number, so it's a done deal. If I had reported them, would the cops even do anything?!?! Saying good-bye to friends is hard. My BFF the other day accused me of "going program" and abandoning her as a friend. It's her own head game and I tried my best to assure her that I'm not going anywhere, but at the same point, our friendship is really making our pity party of one a pity party of two via phone call. Now that I'm not interested in pity parties, I'm not really sure what to talk to her about. It's very strange. I'm trying hard now though, to just focus on fixing me. Later I can decide how all the people in my life are influencing me, but first I need to clear up how I am influencing me. I'm hoping once I get that cleared up, the relationships will shake out on their own. Just try and take it slow. Sounds like you're starting to feel a lot better and are jumping on a lot of stuff at once (cleaning, friendships, trip to Home Depot, seeing your dad, etc.). Maybe that's why you had so much rage over iPhone lady. Sounds like my rage over Nintendo the other day. I was literally just trying to find something external and stupid to dump my emotions on. I knew it at the time too, but it felt like safe anger somehow, so I went with it.
Got some running tops and a pitchfork (and some pjs and panties) for Mother's Day (yes, I asked for all of those things!). I'm wearing my new running top now even though I'm banned from running due to my back problem for the time being. I wore it while I did all my PT exercises. I find the whole concept of "power walking" so hideously lame, but I'm almost considering heading out. I feel like I will turn into a blob without exercise, and I need an outlet for my nervous energy. Typing to you all is at least getting out a little of it. My poor keyboard...
Happy Mother's Day Bandicoots!
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