Sulu1

Evening all, hope you are all feeling well. Not going to lie, it's been a tough day here, had a brief emotional moment but I think it's probably because I feel so tired/ have loads of uni deadlines coming up/ and am still feeling a bit overwhelmed.

One thing I definately will not be doing is picking up the bottle. Sat having a cup of camomile and cooking some enchiladas for my dinner. My Rabbit is sat next to me also having her museli!

bounced

Hi sobrietygrl4

My first alcohol counsellor said to me "you cannot fail at being a human being". Whenever things get REALLY tough for me, I repeat that back to myself.

You are taking an amazing step simply by being here on this forum and I salute you.

bounced

NewLife2013

You are already ahead of most of your peers. You admitted you have a problem, and are now seeking help. It took me 10 years to take this step.

Kids have an amazing capacity to love their parents in spite of shortcomings.

Throughout much of my life, I have looked at how people fix their mistakes as the yardstick to measure them - rather than by what mistakes they make. So a big problem is a big opportunity to show your loved-ones that you can turn this around.

Godspeed.

Zedebee

Great attitude Grindilow =)
Good luck with the uni stuff. And your rabbit's so cute...


Coming to the end of day 3 this time round. I've not made it more than a week for a few months now. This week is different though because it's the first full weekend I've gone for a while (my weekends are Sunday Monday and Tuesday).

LookingOut

Just checking in on day 2. I felt like crap yesterday, but slept well and feel a lot better today. It will probably take some time though to be back at 100%. I have remained sober for years at a time, but forget and drink again. So, I know I can do it but need to work on remembering where it takes me and on keeping peace in my soul.

I know the first year last time was okay. Last year I started getting addicted to doing online debates and I think that took away the serenity I had worked toward. It is the first time I let something else bad replace the alcohol. So, I am resigning from the debate society and and letting go and letting God and trying to listen for a while.

Peace and sober days to all!

gsp0050

Sobrietygrl, please hang in there and hopefully each sober day that passes things will get better.

Hi all, just checking in. Day 6, sleeping and feeling better. Handling the cravings with lots of water and walking the dog. I will be off the board for a few days because I need surgery on my arm, which has me worried. The good news is, can't possibly drink tonight and will be laid up for a couple of days so maybe that will help. Had my first drinking dream last night and I can relate with others here when they say the brain is telling them that their not an alcoholic because we made it 6 days. I have to supress this thought. For me, the cravings don't seem as bad, but once I have one, I just can't stop until I about pass out.

Everyone hang in there and stay tough. I know I won't drink and will be back on ASAP.

One bright note: my daughter needed some help at her house the other night and I didn't have to make some lame excuse because I was actually too drunk to drive. I went right over and it felt good.

MyTimeNow

Ohhh this is hard. I've had a pig of a day and gotten through it. Was just reading through some posts thinking I'll just go to bed even though it's only 7pm here and I'm not particularly tired...

Then out of the blue, a thought pops into my head, why not just whizz out quickly for some wine to relax?

Aaaargh!

I'm going to bed!!

Hmmmm 2 posts today containing an Aaargh. Here's to a better day tomorrow. Sorry have not caught up on any of the posts, will do in the morning

yestofreedom

Do you ever look at those that are younger than you, and see them drinking
and partying and get a bit jealous of it all.
but i keep thinking that now i have learned from my bad experiences; maybe
they havent had theirs yet.
thats why its probably so important to keep reminding myself, I have partied enough; and there is nothing i am missing out on.
slipping like i did a few months ago i think was a cause of being around younger adults who were JUST getting into their prime of partying ( if there is such a thing). Just experiencing the new city.
it was a bad mistake because i had binged for many weekends which then led into work days.
well, ive been sober and not drank since i joined SR; this really helps.

i'm even starting to wonder, who else is out there on my journeys to work.
you never know; and by being on here, you can see how many of us struggle.

thanks

JimJim

Evening all, So I drank last night. Preparation for the job interview became too overwhelming, can't squeeze in four years training in a couple o' days. That pissed away year is costly. Got upset with where I am at the moment. Not gonna make it to the interview I reckon, another bitter pill to swallow. We are all struggling with circumstances and so I'm sorry. There are ways around these circumstances though. Forwards.

I had the liquid breakfast too, and strong stuff throughout the day. I'm probably fighting for my life, getting one socially coupled with the inevitability that my body will not sustain this poisoning eventually.

There are no words, I'm done typing and discussing this I know what I gotta do man. I'm sorry if you think I have taken the easy way out, but please know I am fighting this by the second day after day at the moment and I'm upsst to say the least. With this interview out of the way I ca n focus full time on not drinking and recovery. Tomorrow will be day one. I can not give up, I think I still have too much to lose. I think it's all mapped out here on SR where people go with drink. It's all too familiar, all of the the stories and posts have recurring themes, I'm not at the end yet and so I still have another chance.

gsp0050

Just venting. Here's what irritates me. On the televison shows, mainly drama's, many of the characters drink alcohol and make it look normal. For instance, my wife watches Blue Bloods and Tom Seleck comes home every night after work and pours a scotch. Then when the whole family is together eating they all have wine or beer at the table. It irritates me because they make it look so normal, like everyone does that. It bothers my thinking because I was just like them (only my drinks didn't stop). I would come home from work, relax with a scotch or bourbon before dinner. Have wine with dinner. Then a few more scotches or bourbon's before bed. Just like the televison shows, when my wife and I are cooking in the kitchen, we have to be sipping wine. It looks so normal and American. Corrupts my thinking, "see, you're normal, everyone drinks like you do", "you don't have a problem, that's moderate drinking". I can really feed myself a bunch of crap.

Anyhoo, thanks for the post drinking vent. Day 7, here I come. Everyone, good job and stay strong for tonight.

bounced

I am tempted to say that I had a bad day and then I read some of the messages on here and...well...I didn't have such a bad day compared with some of my other classmates here.

So, instead of being negative, I am just going to count my blessings that I am still on course and look forward to a better day tomorrow.

timetotry1

Just checking in , day 8 going ok for me...

Sometimes this Confucius quote helps me when things don't quite go right

"Our greatest glory is not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall."

Probable been quoted lots of time here but I think it is one worth remembering...for this struggle as well as quite a few others...

Keep strong all

Dee74

I'm sorry you drank Jim.

The problem with drinking every time everything 'too heavy' comes up is...we never get anywhere.

I'm not beating you up cos I did this too.

I drank because fear got too much for me.

for me, for a long time, I was more comfortable in my crappy drinking life than I was trying to break out of it...and before I knew it I was wasting decades, not just years.

Intent is good Jim...it's great....but you really really need to make changes. We all do.

I really encourage you to push yourself a little...do something different, something concrete...change your parameters... or you'll just get sucked back in.

D

halfvictory

hey class. I am feeling a bit anxious as I am heading home soon. funny how I feel so good after 3 days that I feel like I can have a drink. I know not too.

going to try hard. nothing that I know of to provoke me into having a drink. Day 4 tomorrow. I want to be able to say "I am on day 4" tomorrow. And I will

Melanomagirl

Dee, you have even blessed with an amazing ability to say the right words to people!!

I've been trying to follow the posts...I feel like I need a chart or something to help me keep everyone straight😜

I'm on day 3...the last three days have been great!
Good luck classmates!

Pataphor

I thought I wrote this...no, I wish I had. Thanks for sharing!

JimJim

Thanks as always Dee, your help is invaluable, what you said though,

The thing is, I can see it and I know it. what you said.

I can only promise myself that tomorrow morning will be different. I intend it to be, but I also have plans and a strengthened resolve to make the changes I need in my life.

I know what I gotta do man. I'm gonna give it my all with this, or I would not be here.

Change is all about action, there is nothing much more to say. You are a God though Dee

Midlifecrisis

Sorry to hear Jim. I don't have any words of advice because I was THAT close to using or drinking myself yesterday. White knuckling all the way. Glad you're still posting. It's so frustrating when you know yourself SO well and can see why you do things but do them anyway. So painful.

blondsober

Like many others, I'm here on Day 6 thinking that I'm back to normal and a glass of wine tonight will be alright. Maybe it will. But then tomorrow night a half a bottle is alright, then when I get the kids on Thursday - a big trigger - and there is no stopping. So I am looking forward to a clear-headed Day 7.

To those who have slipped a bit - a few days going in the right direction puts you ahead of where you were - get back on the train and let's keep going!

Ken

WhoDey

I was in this place ... knowing what I needed to do, but, honestly, not wanting to do it. It was easier to give up.

Sometimes it's easier being in a hell that we know than to take steps towards an uncertain future even if that future is bright.