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Class Of October 2012 Part 4

Old 11-08-2012, 05:25 AM
  # 61 (permalink)  
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Hey guys, and Jim. It is good to hear from you.

We are still here for you, and know that you are encouraged to jump back in with us. I was warned about getting "cabin fever" too. Told to come up with a plan so I do not revert back to drinking. I do not know what I am going to do yet. I am applying for some jobs that I have never done before. UPS and Home Depot. I think it will keep me busy just interacting with people and having a stress free job.... well compared to running my own construction jobs. Maybe get out and apply for jobs, not for the money but just something new. Who knows, you may like it? I am not here to tell you what to do, but please think hard about the whiskey and stop before it gets bad again. I am in pain just thinking about how much that stuff hurts us. It is now that we have to stay strong, not tomorrow.

Midnight, cake is better than alcohol

I let myself indulge now and then, but I try to stick to my diet.
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Old 11-08-2012, 07:12 AM
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Midnight - great post.

RV I dont know why but I read somewhere that the risk for relapse hits the hardest at certain times typically at the 30,90,120 day mark. For me that was totally true, so now I know I have to be extra strong around these times. I'm back on day 6 and I'm so mad at myself. The worst part is the regret and guilt. Hang in there and dont give in
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Old 11-08-2012, 08:54 AM
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Well here we are day 9... Almost to double digits!!!

JimJim - Don't give up my friend. The cycle won't end until you put the plug in the jug. You have already proven you can do this. Just get back on the horse and start over. No shame, it's just what we do.

RedViper - Don't do it... You know where it leads and you know how you will feel afterwords (actually the second it hits your mouth). Keep on keeping on!!! You can do this!

Midnight - I'm having the same issues at work. Not getting done what I should be and a coworker is throwing it in my face making it worse, however I know this will pass...

Hope22 - Welcome back!!!

We are having some issues at home getting my youngest son to go to high school. It's a new school and it is a fight everyday to get him to go. I was so sad this morning knowing that he is only hurting his future that I almost stopped and got a beer... Like that would help matters... It's crazy how our AV constantly finds any way it can to get us to go back... I know today that I can be no help to my son drunk... I have lots of problems (don't we all) but certainly a drink won't fix any of them...

Have a safe and sober day everyone!!!

Wifi - d9
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Old 11-08-2012, 12:41 PM
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Hi everyone-

Jim--sorry you are stuggling, I know how you feel, I felt so similar to how you do earlier this year. I just couldn't see my way out of the mess drinking was making of my life because even though it made me a mess it was my only friend.
I had no one else. All my friends deserted me, my family is pretty much gone.

It did take me a while to try again and give it up. But deep down I know, and you know, it's doing you no good. You gave it up for 30, you know how much better you feel, but it's so easy to fall back into that pit.
I hope you see your way back. We're here for you, you're not alone.

Wifi--day 9 fantastic! Almost double digits!

Germanos--your plan sounds good-get around new people and do something new.

Midnight/RV--hang in there, it will get better, or no one would ever stay sober, right?

To everyone else, keep going, we can do this.
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Old 11-08-2012, 12:45 PM
  # 65 (permalink)  
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And now a quick post about me:
I'm at day 12. Feeling ok, a little tired, stressed from work and obligations. Like everyone is. Not feeling like drinking.
But...I'm so upset about my lack of friends. It hit me again today, and I'm trying to not be bitter or angry that they all seemingly abandoned me, but I am. There, I admit it. I don't know if this is related to not drinking that I suddenly feel so bad as this happened a few months ago, or what, but I was really upset about it today.

Just don't really know what to do. Maybe its for the best as they all drink, and drank heavily, but it doesn't feel that way now. I feel so abandoned.
Oh well...
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Old 11-08-2012, 01:20 PM
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Jim I am sorry you are struggling. We've all been there I assure you. If this sobriety thing was a walk in the park we wouldn't have so many people on this forum or people attending meetings after 10, 20 and even 30 and 40 years of sobriety.

I am going to an addictions therapist for the first time and I feel the sessions are very empowering. I know I have a mental defect that makes me crave alcohol once in a while. It helps me look at it that way. On US election night, when I heard smoking pot will be legal in certain states now, I felt this urge to vacation there. An urge for smoking pot after over 25 years of not doing that. I couldn't believe it.

Do you have access to addiction therapy? I know you need insurance for that in the US. If no insurance, find a mental health clinic with a sliding scale or a cheap therapist. I am finding that discussing my screwy thinking with a professional helps.

Take good care of you man.

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Old 11-08-2012, 01:22 PM
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Hey red viperhang in there man. Don't get disappointed because the urge came back for a while. It will go away. Nothing stays the same ever, no thing. I find comfort in that.

Natalie
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Old 11-08-2012, 01:24 PM
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Sam I hear ya. Loneliness is a definite trigger for me. Hang on tight and congrats on your 12 days. That's no easy task

Natalie
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Old 11-08-2012, 01:38 PM
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I lost a lot of friends too Sam - and I agonised over that too.

I eventually realised I had to change my life like I did...I really had no choice...

& I had real friends who supported me...those who disappeared? the only thing we must have had in common was drinking.

I reconnected with a lot of old friends and made a heap of new ones. You will too. It's been 12 days y'know?

Think about your hobbies your interests or the things you'd like to do now that don't involve drinking...go do those things and meet new people

give it some time Sam

D
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Old 11-08-2012, 06:10 PM
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Hello everyone, day 10 (nearly 11). It was horrible the first 4 days but gotta say this is so much better than nothingness. I am taking all my vitamins and there is really no cravings that are horrid. Not a lot of support from my oldest, guess I can't blame her. This is the longest I have went without vodka in over 8 years. She said she knew I will mess up and go back. Boy will she be surprised! I never want to go back to that place again.

So much amends I have to make, but hey I have all the time! Thanks to all on this site, you are my support! Oh and I have a recovery group I met with last Friday and again tomorrow. Looking forward to making it through tomorrow!
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Old 11-08-2012, 09:44 PM
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Thanks for the support. I avoided the drink and I realized I'm in need of time off. I would love to just rent a cabin in the woods and shut off the craziness called life. I haven't had a vacation in four years. I'm just worn out. Sobriety is hard work.
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Old 11-08-2012, 11:52 PM
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My first AA meeting

Hi
I am 21 days sober and going to my first AA meeting this evening! Do not know what to expect feeling a little nervous.
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Old 11-09-2012, 01:46 AM
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Welcome holis

I'm not in AA myself but this link may help
Your First AA Meeting<

D
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Old 11-09-2012, 04:18 AM
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Don't give up JimJim we all have to start over many times until we get it right. Me included my friend.

well done to everyone in the first few weeks.
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Old 11-09-2012, 10:16 AM
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Good morning/evening, Octsober mates.

Another sober Friday for me, Day 26.

Dmarcha, Hollis - welcome)

Happy sober weekend to all!
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Old 11-09-2012, 02:36 PM
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hi everyone, day 13 here. I'm still in a funk about having no friends, even though I know other people have such bigger problems to deal with. I guess I'm just so angry with them for just abandoning me that I'm getting bitter.
I also have noticed I have a very short fuse the last two days, lots of things are irritating me big time.
I'm sorta assuming all of this is related to not having alcohol around to erase these feelings. And that I just have to ride it out.

Tomorrow I'm going to make myself check out a new class at the gym. As much as I'm moping about not having friends, I can't seem to drum up enthuisiam to go try and do things. But I'm going to force myself.

Hope everyone else is staying strong and sorry to be such a downer.
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Old 11-09-2012, 04:16 PM
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Hi eveyone...day 39.

Struggling a bit. I went to the Dr. because my allergies have been horrible for the past 2-3 weeks. Well, he put me on prednisone. That stuff (steroid) really winds me up and has me craving vodka. It really pumps me up. I've been on this before (a few times during the year) with poison ivy. Well, I was literally able to drink a 5th of vodka when taking prednisone.

I told my wife and she was very supporting and talked me down. I'm wondering if I should just deal with my allergies and stop taking it. This is the first time in 39 days that daydreamed about grabbing a pint and just whipp'n it up.

Anyway, good job eveyone. Welcome to Dmarcha and Holis...thanks for joining us.

Good to see you again Hope22 and wifi...Glad your back

Good job Samwitch....You're not missing anything. We just need to find another hobby...one that isn't slowly destroying us and negatively impacting our lives.

RedViper, thanks for staying strong.

Midnight...you're kick'n butt, keep it up.

Black...nice reinforcement for all of us!

Germanos and fallingtother....thanks for the support.

I just hit up the past 25 post...If I missed you...it's only in my writing.

I hope to see more of Octsober classmates....I eagerly look forward to reading everyone's posts. It really helps us all

Good night all....
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Old 11-09-2012, 04:37 PM
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Day 10 - Turned the big 43 today so it's been a tough one but I haven't caved...

My brain kept telling me, "heck it's your birthday, have a cold one".... NO NO NO NO

I didn't let my AV win...

So far so good!

Thanks for the shout outs and welcome holis!

Wifi - d10
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Old 11-09-2012, 04:41 PM
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Happy birthday Wifi! You'll remember this one and be so happy tomorrow when you wake up and realize you beat back that AV.

Welcome Dmarcha and Holis, happy you're both aboard
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Old 11-09-2012, 05:17 PM
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Happy Birthday Wifi!!!!
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