Class of October 2012 Part 2
Member
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Pennsylvania
Posts: 1,131
Originally Posted by justhadenough 
sorry to hear that wifi
welcome laceybug
welcome laceybug
__________________________________________________ ________________________
LDog, glad you are having a better day. That's and heavy post!
I'd like ride your coat-tail for a bit here LDog....If I may since you got me thinking. That's what we do here, get each other thinking.
My grandfather passed from alcoholism at 57. I was made aware of this very early in my life. I "Neverthought" in my wildest dreams that I would be the one impacted by alcoholism.
My short story:
I remember it well, it was 1998 and I was at a wedding. I had heartburn. I couldn't drink a beer, it just was't going down. So, I went to the bar during the wedding and someone was ordering a Vodka and Tonic. Well, I thought, I'll try one of those. Well, the rest is history.
Within a few years I was able consume a bottle (basically in a whole day) and carry-on a normal conversation, was not slurring or falling down or blacking out. My body is genetically (alcohol inheritance) designed to handle that kind of abuse but only for so long. And I really believe this.
Well, after years and years it began to slowly and unbeknownst to me destroy me just as if I were the frog in the "boiling frog" theory.
For those youngsters in your 20's and those in your 30's. Catch it now....I'm 42...I wish I took it more serious and did this 5-10 years ago.
"NT"
Member
Join Date: Jan 2012
Posts: 1,180
Originally Posted by Lyingdog
Day 3 and the depression is better than yesterday. My depression was so sever yesterday because of the walk down memory lane I could not get out of my mind. All the ignorant and dishonest things I have done. I accept those things as in the past and not who I am from this point on. I find comfort in thinking about all the people I can help if I share my story with as many people as possible. The risk/ reward is way overloaded on the risk side. What is the reward of being a "normal" drinker? You can go out and drink sometimes? What about that hangover? What about the fact that you are less ambitious about your accomplishments? Etc, etc. what is the risk? You could be an alcoholic. That means you can hurt a lot of people you love before you recover... Praying for foregiveness, you may physically hurt someone before you recover, DUI, Kill someone in a car wreck, never recover and drink your self to death,etc, etc.*
If people would by into that fact the world would be safer and more peaceful.*
I hope and pray that the class of October stays sober and spreads the message of alcoholism to as many people as possible. What would you give to be able to go back before your first drink and have a message spoken to you that inspired you to never drink? That is our responsability IMHO if, by the grace of God, we are foregiven and have the strength to never drink again. After all.... That strength is not our own (or we would not be alcoholic) it is from above. Let's give back and use that as our biggest tool to fight cravings.*
Bless the class of October....
If people would by into that fact the world would be safer and more peaceful.*
I hope and pray that the class of October stays sober and spreads the message of alcoholism to as many people as possible. What would you give to be able to go back before your first drink and have a message spoken to you that inspired you to never drink? That is our responsability IMHO if, by the grace of God, we are foregiven and have the strength to never drink again. After all.... That strength is not our own (or we would not be alcoholic) it is from above. Let's give back and use that as our biggest tool to fight cravings.*
Bless the class of October....
Member
Join Date: Oct 2012
Posts: 7
Day 4 and struggling - this is the farthest I've gotten in years. It's usually right about now that I'd order a "chinese takeaway" (because my local chinese will deliver wine, too).
Not particularly healthy but right now lots of hot cross buns are helping...
Not particularly healthy but right now lots of hot cross buns are helping...
Member
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: NY
Posts: 227
This is day 5 for me, and now the real work begins because I have been visiting my parents and now I am back home where it is so much easier to stop by the liquor store.
But I won't. I have been able to sleep well which was always one of my stated reasons for drinking before bed, and my hands are not shaking anymore when I try to do things with them. Now, I just have to decide how I will spend all of this free time that's no longer tied up drinking
.
Welcome to all of the new class and together I think we can make it through this.
But I won't. I have been able to sleep well which was always one of my stated reasons for drinking before bed, and my hands are not shaking anymore when I try to do things with them. Now, I just have to decide how I will spend all of this free time that's no longer tied up drinking
.Welcome to all of the new class and together I think we can make it through this.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2012
Posts: 1,180
Originally Posted by Neverthought
It can be as long as you keep fighting. Stay busy, stay occuppied and most of all stay positive!
Ultimitely, I too am doing this for my 5 year old. He's a very bright boy and I want to see him through school, college and get married, have children and have a successful life. I love him more than I've ever loved anything. Booze and my wife were competing for second...know she is winning hands down. In fact, Booze has been disqualified.
Sorry, got carried away! There is no better motivation than family let alone your children. You can do this SFMS!
Your user name says it all!
Ultimitely, I too am doing this for my 5 year old. He's a very bright boy and I want to see him through school, college and get married, have children and have a successful life. I love him more than I've ever loved anything. Booze and my wife were competing for second...know she is winning hands down. In fact, Booze has been disqualified.
Sorry, got carried away! There is no better motivation than family let alone your children. You can do this SFMS!
Your user name says it all!
Member
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Nevada
Posts: 174
Day 8. When does this get easier? I mean I think I feel better. I slept very well last night and my dreams are so vivid. But my mind keeps telling me to swing by the bar on the way home, it will not hurt. But then I remember the daily hangovers. I don't want them anymore. I'll tough this out.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: The Netherlands
Posts: 42
Originally Posted by Redviper
Day 8. When does this get easier? I mean I think I feel better. I slept very well last night and my dreams are so vivid. But my mind keeps telling me to swing by the bar on the way home, it will not hurt. But then I remember the daily hangovers. I don't want them anymore. I'll tough this out.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: Japan
Posts: 147
Morning of day 7 and feeling good. Up at 6 on tho beautiful morning, and getting out to have a surf before work. It's a great reminder of why I have made this commitment to myself- I will never miss out on the things I truly love because of a hangover ever again.
Have a great day everyone!
Have a great day everyone!
Administrator
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,386
welcome to all our newcomers and those coming back again 
It is really hard to turn our backs on the way we've lived our lives for so long...even when we know that way of life doesn't work...then there's often a difficult transition period too...
but there really are no answers back the way we came...and it really does get better
Support was the key for me - find all the support you can to keep going forwards and make those changes you know we all need to make
D
It is really hard to turn our backs on the way we've lived our lives for so long...even when we know that way of life doesn't work...then there's often a difficult transition period too...
but there really are no answers back the way we came...and it really does get better
Support was the key for me - find all the support you can to keep going forwards and make those changes you know we all need to make
D
Life Goes On
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: Baltimore, Maryland
Posts: 6,069
Originally Posted by Dee74
It is really hard to turn our backs on the way we've lived our lives for so long...even when we know that way of life doesn't work...then there's often a difficult transition period too...
but there really are no answers back the way we came...and it really does get better
D
but there really are no answers back the way we came...and it really does get better
D
Day Two for me and AV jumped around the corner while I was walking out of work, "Boo!" I wasn't scared, but I was taken by surprise nonetheless. All day long, I'd been thinking nice positive thoughts like, "Dang I am a Highly Functioning Person when away from the booze. I'll take that over being a functioning alcoholic anyday." So on the train, I read other posts and didn't quite urge surf like I probably oughta (kind of scared of the waves right now), but I did make it to the point where once I was actually driving my car I became preoccupied with other thoughts and didn't EVEN note when I was passing the liquour store.
In my jammies now, safely ensconsed in my home.
I'm good for the night.
I don't feel "proud," exactly, but I don't feel bad either.
So that's something.
Greetings to all who roam these halls loudly and lurkingly. Glad you are all here.
Still I rise.
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: Oh Canada!
Posts: 1,121
Originally Posted by Redviper
Day 8. When does this get easier? I mean I think I feel better. I slept very well last night and my dreams are so vivid. But my mind keeps telling me to swing by the bar on the way home, it will not hurt. But then I remember the daily hangovers. I don't want them anymore. I'll tough this out.
OMG, the vivid dreams. So nutso.
Thumbs up to no hangover for both of us tomorrow.
Best to you all in the October group!
Member
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Florida US
Posts: 296
Redviper I am hoping you are being able to handle those cravings. I haven't seen you post in this new thread. If you gave in, just get back on the saddle. Easier said than done, I know, but it is possible. Just read, read, read. The time spent on this forum is insurance against drinking.
Ophelia, congrats on staying sober through the holiday. That's a real biggie.
I am on day 8, feeling very secure on my sobriety. I still get upset at my stupidity with the Valium. It was ultimately me who made the decision to drink, not the Valium, but damn, I had almost 5 months. Regret is poisonous to me so I have to put this behind me and concentrate on the wonderful 8 days I have.
I am really having my butt kicked by 5th grade math and science and have conferences with my kid's teachers tomorrow to see how I can better help her. Her grades are poor and if I don't nip it at the bud right now, it will become unmanageable for her. The amount of homework is just ridiculous. I am able to do this (meet with teachers, etc) because I am sober.
I am finding out that during the 5 days I took the valium and the 3 days that I drank I suffered memory loss. I am finding that I've completed work at the office and have no recollection of having done that. I wasn't drunk at the office and the work is well done, but the combination of the booze and valium have erased a large chunk of memory.This is trully a progressive malady. I, fortunately or unfortunately, was one of those who remembered everything the morning after I drank, so this is new to me.
Keep up the good work October class. Those struggling, it gets better, it really does.
Natalie
Ophelia, congrats on staying sober through the holiday. That's a real biggie.
I am on day 8, feeling very secure on my sobriety. I still get upset at my stupidity with the Valium. It was ultimately me who made the decision to drink, not the Valium, but damn, I had almost 5 months. Regret is poisonous to me so I have to put this behind me and concentrate on the wonderful 8 days I have.
I am really having my butt kicked by 5th grade math and science and have conferences with my kid's teachers tomorrow to see how I can better help her. Her grades are poor and if I don't nip it at the bud right now, it will become unmanageable for her. The amount of homework is just ridiculous. I am able to do this (meet with teachers, etc) because I am sober.
I am finding out that during the 5 days I took the valium and the 3 days that I drank I suffered memory loss. I am finding that I've completed work at the office and have no recollection of having done that. I wasn't drunk at the office and the work is well done, but the combination of the booze and valium have erased a large chunk of memory.This is trully a progressive malady. I, fortunately or unfortunately, was one of those who remembered everything the morning after I drank, so this is new to me.
Keep up the good work October class. Those struggling, it gets better, it really does.
Natalie
Member
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: NY
Posts: 227
I am wondering if anyone else has this issue. Not sure if its a problem, something related to not drinking or what. I find myself sort of racing through everything. Eating, driving, typing, putting laundry into the dryer, all kind of stuff. Its like when I begin a physical action, I automatically do it as fast as possible. And no caffeine at all today, but that's kind of what it feels like.
I don't feel impatient, or any more than usual. It just seems to be a physical thing.
Has anyone else experienced something like this?
Thanks.
I don't feel impatient, or any more than usual. It just seems to be a physical thing.
Has anyone else experienced something like this?
Thanks.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: Miami, Florida
Posts: 24
Re-starting Day 1: My masochistic cycle of drinking & remorse
I'm here to report my Epic fail this weekend.
Saturday was supposed to be my 5th day of sobriety. Instead, I am starting Day 1 today again.
I had every intention of staying sober Saturday night.
My agent picked up at 10am for the photo shoot at 11am. Unlike the prior audition I screwed up 2 weeks ago, he was happy to see that my eyes were not bloodshot and my hair was sparkling clean.
It was supposed to be a 3-4 hour shoot. But it dragged on until 8pm. My face felt raw by 5pm since the make-up artist insisted on changing the make-up six times.
Everyone was getting cranky on the set: no food, just zipping through wardrobe, makeup, and scenery changes.
We ended up drinking on someone's boat in South Beach from Saturday night until Sunday night.
Today, is my first day sober again. I just feel so frustrated and angry at myself. Even though I don't drink on weekdays, my binge drinking on weekends more than compensates for my weekday deprivation.
I am grateful for this forum. It gives me hope when I feel despair. When I see that someone breaks 30 days I feel happy and inspired.
Thank you.
Saturday was supposed to be my 5th day of sobriety. Instead, I am starting Day 1 today again.
I had every intention of staying sober Saturday night.
My agent picked up at 10am for the photo shoot at 11am. Unlike the prior audition I screwed up 2 weeks ago, he was happy to see that my eyes were not bloodshot and my hair was sparkling clean.
It was supposed to be a 3-4 hour shoot. But it dragged on until 8pm. My face felt raw by 5pm since the make-up artist insisted on changing the make-up six times.
Everyone was getting cranky on the set: no food, just zipping through wardrobe, makeup, and scenery changes.
We ended up drinking on someone's boat in South Beach from Saturday night until Sunday night.
Today, is my first day sober again. I just feel so frustrated and angry at myself. Even though I don't drink on weekdays, my binge drinking on weekends more than compensates for my weekday deprivation.
I am grateful for this forum. It gives me hope when I feel despair. When I see that someone breaks 30 days I feel happy and inspired.
Thank you.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Florida US
Posts: 296
Mister I think that's called not living in the now. Eckhart Tolle's book The Power of Now was instrumental in allowing me to see how I just rushed through life waiting for the next thing or event to happen, not really living life, but always waiting for life to happen. Hard to explain but I know where you are coming from.
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