lyddie

Happy Thanksgiving!

My thanksgiving wish for today is a wish that everyone who participated in this thread when it started in June 2010 is able to be thankful and enjoy today's holiday.

Dee74

sounds good to me lyddie - have a good day yourself

D

alexvt

Ok so it's been awhile..It got bad the last 2 months. It did not get drinking and driving bad, not crazy bad, but mentally and physically bad. I have been clawing way back to sobriety this week.

I started drinking 2 bottles of wine almost every day from 5pm-1am. I have been drinking for 6 months now.

I have 6 days now and I felt like I was having a nervous breakdown. Still do but it is very slowly getting better almost manageable.

I know I have to do more to maintain my sobriety this time, but I am at least starting here.

Lyddie, I am so sorry for all you are going through. I am sorry I haven't been here for you. I just couldn't even face myself.

DD is doing good. Her dad never calls her, says he doesn't want to hear my voice. What a crock. Oh well I can't fight that battle.

Lot's of stress living here on my own. My mom rarely comes over nor does anyone. I guess it will take time. My mom works at nursing home as LPN and she is worn out so I guess that's her reason.

DD is in PrK 3 days a week and has dancing and tumble bus. So there is that. I try to get her to my sis or somewhere very once in awhile. It's my fault though because as you may remember Alcohol turns you into a recluse. Plus I was spennding way too much money,now I am in a hole trying to dig my way out of. I don't work and depend soley on her Father. It's crazy dumb of me.

I think I drank to take my mind off what I need to do and to face it. It was like I spent so much time trying to move here once I got here I didn't know what to do. I was so tired from the struggle so I gave in. So, I am here for today. Thankful to God.

Sorry Dee,Lyddie, and HFA.

I hope you are all doing Great

-Beth

Dee74

I'm sorry to hear you're struggling Beth - but I'm glad you're back

Nothing against this thread but it's not very active anymore - why not think about moving to the Class of January or February?

I agree I think you need to kick things into a higher gear...some regular support could really help start that process

D

alexvt

I know Dee, It's my safe place though for now.

I was wondering if there were a lot of people who relapse after a year?

Also how are you doing?

I hope you're not mad at me..

-Beth

Dee74

I'm not mad - I've been there Beth

I think a lot of people relapse after a while - they mistake 'abstinence' for 'control'...I know I did.

It's kinda like me holding a drivers licence

I have no demerits at all...on paper I'm an awesome driver...if I looked just at that, I might convince myself I should buy a car again....

but actually? I'm the worst driver in history, who simply accepted long ago he shouldn't drive

D

alexvt

Missed you Dee!

Thanks

-B

lyddie

Hey Beth -

I thought about you today so I thought I would log into SR (haven't been here in a few weeks) to see if you had checked in. I think about you often and keep sending you strong healing sober thoughts. You can do this again and once you have more sober days in, I am sure you will be able to figure out how to make your life work back home.

I think HFA relapsed after a year too. He started posting in a the class for the month he become sober in the 2nd or 3rd time around. Perhaps you might start back by reading the posts for the Class of Jan or Feb 2013. You may be able to help some of the newcomers since you did achieve a year of sobriety before starting to drink again.

Stay strong and consider yourself HUGGED !! :ghug3

Dee74

good to see you too Lyddie

D

alexvt

Hey Lyddie,

That is so funny that you were thinking about me and I had checked in. I am on day 7 and feel awesome! Whew, just good to feel like my old self. It's been too long.

How are you coin? I worry about you too! I prob think about you everyday.

I know i need to join other group on here but it feels like too much work right now. I am really busy with Alex and CLEANING! It seems like thats all I do these.

I am looking for an AA here that allows kids. I think they actually have fun. Of course it will have to be an all women non smoking meeting. I wonder if they have any moms only AA's? Dee?

If feels good to be back, I am sure you understand! I feel like I have breathing room. I am going to keep on keeping on!

HUG right Back at you!!

-Beth

lyddie

Beth

I am doing ok. Getting ready to make some changes in my life in about 4 months. It's time.

There should be a moms only (or at least a women only group) in your area. There's a group called Women for Sobriety - WFS - that might have meetings in Georgia. It's not AA but does have similar principles. It was created by a woman who struggled with her drinking for years for women only. I think if you google it you should get more info.

Stay strong!

Dee74

anything important needs time spent on it tho, yeah?
I think you'd benefit from a more active group here with people at the same point of the journey as you....but it's up to you Beth

I'm not an AA member Beth, so I really dunno.

I've heard of women only meetings but not moms only. Some meetings do have childcare tho, I'm told.

Lyddie had some good ideas too

D

alexvt

Thanks!

You stay strong too.

I know this is not an active sight but I am not struggling anymore with any thoughts of alcohol. This is just me venting and writing. I know you have people who really need your help Dee. You helped me all the way. My next step will be a meeting outside Sr. I think this was a great launching pad and wonderful support but I need to be able to talk with a group of people and get outside my comfort zone.

I am going to check in here and nobody worry about me..but I would like to hear from you guys now again.Or every day but I know your not where I am right now so I get it

I will keep you updated Lyddie and if you need me you know where to find me. You too HFA, or even you Dee!! Or anybody.

Sometimes when people read about someone else's struggles all the way through it can help. Maybe somebody's been following my story and I just can't go out like that.

Probably not though but just in case... LOL!

Lyddie, are you excited? Just 4 more months! I am so proud of you. Hey if you miss it you can always go back at least part-time. Are you going to go stay with your mom? Ugh! I feel so bad for your pain. 3 yrs is coming up. Your an amazingly strong woman, and don't you forget it!

Day 7 (again)

lyddie

Beth -

I will be checking in here to see how you are doing. Good luck in your search for a women's group. You should be able to start your search on the internet and then perhaps follow up with a phone call or two. A good group will offer to have someone meet you at the group or even pick you up to make the introduction easier.

alexvt

Day 9

So happy to feel a little like my old self. I took DD to the park yesterday and walk the dogs. It was a California like day. So thankful for another chance to live sober. The clarity between living life drinking and 'just getting by' and living sober are worlds apart. Day and Night!

Glad to be back amongst the living.

-Beth

alexvt

10 days and holding strong!

Have a good weekend all

Xo-Beth

Dee74

way to go Beth - have a good weekend

D

ANEWAUGUST

Beth..

So good to see you back here.

I know of some amazing women who attend AA in Atlanta. I would be glad to put you in touch with one of them, if you would like. Atlanta has alot of quality sobriety to offer.

You can do this, one day at a time....

alexvt

2 weeks.barely..

I really wanted some wine tonight but I managed to go home instead of the store. I knew once I got home I would be safe...

Surprised it's so hard this time.

Anew- could you give me the number of someone who would know all of the meetings available? Thanks-hope you are well

Tired have been going non-stop.

Night-

Freedom2009

Beth..

It's Anew. I changed my username/profile.

I have the name and number of someone to call.

Is your email info attached to your profile? If it is, I will email it to you.