Class of February 2012 Part 3
 

Continues from here:

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...rt-2-a-20.html

keep up the good work guys!
:scoregood

D

jahright

It sounds like your trying to do this alone. If that's the case, no wonder your struggling. I'm a member of AA and couldn't imagine trying to quit without them. Perhaps you could check out a meeting and see for yourself. If that's not your cup of tea, there's a host of other programs avaliable and I bet if we ask Dee really, really nicely, he'll post some of them for us.

None of us are perfect jahright, but by quitting the things that are hurting us, we just might get better.

Stay strong, take baby steps and don't forget to breathe.

Like Johnny said, there's many different approaches and methods of recovery around Jahright - here's some links to some of the main players:

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...formation.html

I recommend you visit the Secular Connections forum if you think you may benefit from a non 12 step approach - there's more approaches there too :)

D

Hi everyone, glad you are all hanging.in.there...

I had frequent thoughts today about being able to drink again in the future... Especially when i travel. This is not good, i know. But Im still not drinking at this time and renewing that vow daily, weekly or monthly or more. But today,.... just daily.....

Im still in Orlando. Tonight is night # 18. I am forgetting to count.now. it feels like.months. Truly.

Welcome new folks! Glad youre here!

Checking in. Day 12, feeling exhausted, agitated, crabby, going to go to my room and read a book.

EQ- I am glad that your relationship with your dad is on the mend.

Lilac- I believe you mean what you say about never drinking again. Thats what we are all here for.

JD- I have had a disturbing childhood, but you can only blame so much on your parents.

Bob36- Welcome to February Class 2012

Jahright- making life changes are overwhelming, there is so much good advice and support in SR, it is one of many tools to use while getting in recovery.

Boozefree- congrats on 3 weeks, good going, do you attend AA??

Let me make this perfectly clear. I've stopped playing the 'blame game' years and years ago, especially in regards to my folks. No one ever put a gun to my head and made me drink, do drugs or other nefarious deeds. I am fully accountable for my actions and past misdeeds and blame isent part of my life or recovery plan. I guess in a previous post it came across that way. That's not how it is.

I dont think anyone thinks otherwise about your thinking JohnnyD. But I like the way you expressed in this recent post how to be in healthy spot about.the past.to support recovery.

Though it begs many questions about your nefarious deeds. Ha!

Anyway, seriously, nice job with your Dad.

Got through the weekend. Had a fun one. I am feeling confident, but I'm really scared that it's bordering on hubris and will lead me to think I can drink and control it. Fighting that thought HARD. Noticing more and more how prevalent/ubiquitous booze is in society.

Hey everyone, I do feel overwhelmed at times. It's a big deal, but I have to do this. I'm a binge drinker and have had 3 binges in the past 2 weeks. My wife is at her wits end and has told me our relationship is pretty much over. I ended up going to an AA meeting and it kinda hit me that I haven't been taking my sobriety seriously. I kept thinking I'll get sober later or that I can drink "a little" and no one would find out. I don't know what I was thinking and I would give anything to go back so I wouldn't be so stupid. I really hope I can change...

Hi everyone,
Thanks for your support.this past weekend.

I am gonna get up soon and get ready to.leave for.the airport...

I am hoping by being.back home, i will feel.less like I do now. (which is to say will feel less.like i can drink socially.)

Maybe being back home and back into my routine will help. And also back to being on SR more often may help.

I TOTALLY agree about alcohol being evertywhere. Yesterday my father took.me to Epcot. And we had decided we would eat some German Food. Well what does that.mean? That means we ate family style in a huge beer garden! With drinking people at our table! I drank rootbeer. Dad drank some German version of ODouls.

I tried his Germal Odouols. It tasted like flat bitter fake beer. Yuck.

EQ: congrats on fighting through the thoughts of social drinking

Faustina: yay, day 12! I do the same thing when I am crabby. Far better than drinking, isn't it? And thanks for believing me.

Natty: good job getting through the weekend! Booze is ubiquitous in our society. I got to see my husband acting a fool Friday night (he didn't come home from happy hour til after 11pm and passed out on the couch) and it reminded me that being drunk is not fun.

Jahright: glad you went to a meeting. keep going. and keep checking in here!

Dang, it's Monday. This is a danger for me. I acknowledge that a great deal of my previous on-and-off bingeing over the past month especially was due to work stress. I also know that I won't be able to deal with the work stress if I am getting blitzed. But I am worried about today. My plan is to hit the gym here soon. Attitude adjustment.
I also worry about the possible snow in the forecast. Often makes me want to hibernate with a bottle of vodka. There is a meeting at noon I can go to and will.
I woke up in the middle of the night with anxiety. I have realized, but maybe not completely accepted, that I am like a fish out of water in my current line of work and really need a change. And that I am risking malpractice if I keep going the way I am going. The thing is, how do I tell my husband and parents? I have a plan for "escape" and career change, but don't know how to tell them. I know my parents especially will be disappointed. What parent doesn't love saying their child is a lawyer? Need some good thoughts and prayers to get through today. I'll be checking in.

jahright.

If your anything like me, there is no such thing as drinking a little. Once I start there's no turning back until the bitter end. Picture Homer Simpson fallling down a mountain, bumping, crashing, taking out the odd goat until he comes to a crashing halt, dazed and confused, battered and bashed on a pile of rocks. That's me bingeing. I have to remember that. I can't keep fooling myself into thinking "well, I'll just drink tonight'. It doesn't work that way. It's all or nothing when it comes to booze with me and today I chose nothing.

Glad to hear you've been to a meeting and for realizing recovery is a serious undertaking. At least I think it is.

Here's to having a sober and productive day...JD

Seriouly positive thoughts are on the way lilac. How was the meeting?

I too worry about what the people close to me think about decisions (sp?) i make for myself. Quite frankly it just makes me mental.

Where's that freakin' spell check button! lol

Business Class is right in front of.me separated by their seat back and a little curtain.. I am in the middle seat.of my row which looks in between their two comfy seats. I am going to peek! They better.not.be drinking.alcohol!

Just spent my whole lunch hour trying to find you guys & thinking I'd lost the group completely. :( No time to even read a single post now, but hope to catch up later. Just posting so that I can follow myself back to here...

TriGirl I got lost too! :) Day 14 just about done woohoo! One of the alcohol workers I saw said 2 weeks wasn't very long and was no big deal but it is to me!

Sorry tri - I always try all I can to let people know what's going on - glad you found us :)

D

I am home, and walking around yard with my dog to see what.crocus blooms came up while away. And it was and is usually very satisfying to do this. Once I start getting home with daylight, i do.it every night. But it popped in my head how then my ritual was to pour a drink for sitting on deck, or if the day was really bad,.pour a drink before I even took out the dog and walk around yard garden with dog AND a drink. And i was feeling all sorry for.myself i am ashamed to say...

And a minute.later i.thought: my triggers for drinking and my sacrifice of alcohol are nothing compared to my Dads minute by minute triggers that remind him of mom and the 60 years they traveled everywhere together. And HE is not drinking, as to not aggravate his gout. He stopped in December. Wise.man. He never drank daily or home alone. He knew better.

He also never asked why i wasnt drinking the last three days visiting him. He mightve thought i was just making his abstinence easier. Or, maybe he didnt want to say anything to make me change my mind. Lol

Next to me on the plane was a man about my age, and I asked him what its like to travel businness class. And he said, well i was still drinking then, but.. Etc. and i liked the way he slipped in that he was not drinking now, and later i slipped in a :"I no longer drink either.." Just to practice saying that out loud to a stranger. A person who is no threat, etc.

I thought saying it out loud might help, as i am going through a faze of really.missing it. I have a hunch that is because i am goinv through another wave of grief and want to numb it. I hope that is it. Because i am a little scared about this craving business...