Class of July 2011 Part 5
Eyes Open, No Fear
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: Canada
Posts: 287
Hello everyone.
EnglishRose - you most definitely are worthy and in my opinion you being here and checking in means you are still working at it. Keep going, you can do all of this without alcohol in your life. I lost my mom to cancer in 2006. It was a very hard year of cancer treatments, hospital visits, ambulance rides and so much more. I was lucky in the sense that I actually moved back home a week before my mom was diagnosed so I got to spend it with her. I feel so badly for you that you are not able to be there with her. I also spent much of that year drunk too though. Even wishing that the damn hospital had a bar!
Today is the day I joined SR one year ago. I slipped early on so my one year anniversary date will not be for another three weeks but this is when it all started! In the past year there have been many many times that I wished I could still drink away my awful times. A month ago my husband lost his job and that's a big one. Each time now though I realize that drinking doesn't make anything change or go away and I am actually glad that it's not an option any longer for me.
Wow I am tired tonite but really wanted to check in and say hello. I hope everyone is doing well. I'm off to put the kids to bed and then maybe even myself. Take care,
EnglishRose - you most definitely are worthy and in my opinion you being here and checking in means you are still working at it. Keep going, you can do all of this without alcohol in your life. I lost my mom to cancer in 2006. It was a very hard year of cancer treatments, hospital visits, ambulance rides and so much more. I was lucky in the sense that I actually moved back home a week before my mom was diagnosed so I got to spend it with her. I feel so badly for you that you are not able to be there with her. I also spent much of that year drunk too though. Even wishing that the damn hospital had a bar!
Today is the day I joined SR one year ago. I slipped early on so my one year anniversary date will not be for another three weeks but this is when it all started! In the past year there have been many many times that I wished I could still drink away my awful times. A month ago my husband lost his job and that's a big one. Each time now though I realize that drinking doesn't make anything change or go away and I am actually glad that it's not an option any longer for me.
Wow I am tired tonite but really wanted to check in and say hello. I hope everyone is doing well. I'm off to put the kids to bed and then maybe even myself. Take care,
Member
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: Midwest
Posts: 69
Cerb, VC, Dee, Meetme, Dickenson and ER.
First for clarification, I couldn't for the life of me remember my past log in so I made a new one, I used Edward back in July of 2011 (don't know why, I hated that name). I'm back on the board in the class of June 2012.
First and foremost, I am so, so proud of all of you who have stayed here and remained sober. It's not easy and has given me hope for the future. Looking back on your posts, you are so full of life it warms my heart. A year goes by so fast and life is so short.
A brief update. There was no excuse for leaving this forum other than over confidence, very busy (still no excuse) and giving into the alcohol lies. My daughter got married in October and after over a month of being sober I rationalized that drinking every night was only a habit that was obtained over the years and I could go back to once in a while. Of course, around January the once in a while turned back into everyday. In February of 2012, I was visiting my mom and dad in Arizona. My dad was in a horrific accident right in front of me and my mom. I was able to initially save his life but he passed away 10 days later. At first I was OK but then things started to spiral out of control. A few drinks a night started becoming many drinks a night until I passed out. In a nutshell, I was suffering from PTSD with nightmare memories that were taking their toll and the alcohol was more than self medication.
I got the courage (after confronted by wife and co-workers) to see a psychologist who specializes in PSTD. I admitted my drinking problems with the psychologist who said I would never get better without first stopping all alcohol (it unravels any positive work with PSTD). I then got the courage to see my family doctor and told him that I could not be trusted and needed help. I said I would be under counseling for alcoholism and PSTD. I asked for Antabuse which he prescribed. He told me that Antabuse was only a crutch so I needed to remain in counseling.
I am almost a month alcohol free and I'm weaning from the Antabuse as I get more strength to stay sober. My co-workers knew I had PSTD but I openly admitted that I have also been abusing alcohol. Admitting this, seeing the counselor and my family physician were one of the hardest things I have ever done.
I decided to come back here and joined the June 2012 group. I forgot about 2011 until a day ago and it's so nice to see some familiar names. I only wish I could see a few more.
Today I feel great and my goal is to be just like all of you next year. I will be in counseling for some time but the PSTD and nightmares are fading. My son is expecting his first in August (my first grandchild) and I vowed I will not be a drunken grandparent.
It will be a rough road for me through the year (I made it through the 4th sober- yeah!). If you folks are going to remain here for a while and don't mind if I drop in, I would like your experience and support; especially through the holidays and times when the cravings pop up. You guys have been there first and will have some good insight.
ER- I am so sorry for your mom and I'm glad your back. Please hang it there, you will be in my thoughts and prayers.
GSP0050, aka and formerly Edward
First for clarification, I couldn't for the life of me remember my past log in so I made a new one, I used Edward back in July of 2011 (don't know why, I hated that name). I'm back on the board in the class of June 2012.
First and foremost, I am so, so proud of all of you who have stayed here and remained sober. It's not easy and has given me hope for the future. Looking back on your posts, you are so full of life it warms my heart. A year goes by so fast and life is so short.
A brief update. There was no excuse for leaving this forum other than over confidence, very busy (still no excuse) and giving into the alcohol lies. My daughter got married in October and after over a month of being sober I rationalized that drinking every night was only a habit that was obtained over the years and I could go back to once in a while. Of course, around January the once in a while turned back into everyday. In February of 2012, I was visiting my mom and dad in Arizona. My dad was in a horrific accident right in front of me and my mom. I was able to initially save his life but he passed away 10 days later. At first I was OK but then things started to spiral out of control. A few drinks a night started becoming many drinks a night until I passed out. In a nutshell, I was suffering from PTSD with nightmare memories that were taking their toll and the alcohol was more than self medication.
I got the courage (after confronted by wife and co-workers) to see a psychologist who specializes in PSTD. I admitted my drinking problems with the psychologist who said I would never get better without first stopping all alcohol (it unravels any positive work with PSTD). I then got the courage to see my family doctor and told him that I could not be trusted and needed help. I said I would be under counseling for alcoholism and PSTD. I asked for Antabuse which he prescribed. He told me that Antabuse was only a crutch so I needed to remain in counseling.
I am almost a month alcohol free and I'm weaning from the Antabuse as I get more strength to stay sober. My co-workers knew I had PSTD but I openly admitted that I have also been abusing alcohol. Admitting this, seeing the counselor and my family physician were one of the hardest things I have ever done.
I decided to come back here and joined the June 2012 group. I forgot about 2011 until a day ago and it's so nice to see some familiar names. I only wish I could see a few more.
Today I feel great and my goal is to be just like all of you next year. I will be in counseling for some time but the PSTD and nightmares are fading. My son is expecting his first in August (my first grandchild) and I vowed I will not be a drunken grandparent.
It will be a rough road for me through the year (I made it through the 4th sober- yeah!). If you folks are going to remain here for a while and don't mind if I drop in, I would like your experience and support; especially through the holidays and times when the cravings pop up. You guys have been there first and will have some good insight.
ER- I am so sorry for your mom and I'm glad your back. Please hang it there, you will be in my thoughts and prayers.
GSP0050, aka and formerly Edward
Member
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: Florida
Posts: 1,945
Gsp,
I think that quitting anything is a process that may take many attempts. The key is to keep trying and don't quit. Eventually you will prevail. Over time things get preogressively easier even though it doesn't feel that way when you first start out. I quit smoking two years ago after many attempts. These addictions are not just chemical but mental and I think the mental part of it is the hardest to break because smoking and drinking were part of my life for so long. In my case SR has been my savior for advise and encouragement in beating the alcohol monkey.
Hang in there, keep trying, and you will make it. When you make it as one SR person said "you will be proud to walk this earth".
I think that quitting anything is a process that may take many attempts. The key is to keep trying and don't quit. Eventually you will prevail. Over time things get preogressively easier even though it doesn't feel that way when you first start out. I quit smoking two years ago after many attempts. These addictions are not just chemical but mental and I think the mental part of it is the hardest to break because smoking and drinking were part of my life for so long. In my case SR has been my savior for advise and encouragement in beating the alcohol monkey.
Hang in there, keep trying, and you will make it. When you make it as one SR person said "you will be proud to walk this earth".
Member
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: USA
Posts: 71
What a delight to stop in and see some visiting here! I just got a little choked up. I'm so happy to see you ER and gsp! Congrats to everyone. I am so proud we all are doing this. :-)
Wow... One year! It isn't here quite yet for me (a couple more weeks) but you all got me more excited about it. It seems business as usual most of the time now but I do need to stop and celebrate.
Happy Friday everyone!
Hugs!
Wow... One year! It isn't here quite yet for me (a couple more weeks) but you all got me more excited about it. It seems business as usual most of the time now but I do need to stop and celebrate.
Happy Friday everyone!
Hugs!
Member
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Rhode Island
Posts: 443
Hi gsp0050, and ER, I remember you both. gsp0050 I had to go back in search and find "Edward", you had the Mr. Ed avatar, no?
Well, I've never really posted much here, or on SR in general, just don't have a lot to say. Okay, that's not true, believe it or not, I'm quite the windbag, but I only post on SR when I feel I have something to say (usually I'm being an "instigator" - although, my wife has another name for it
). Today, I just wanted to say hi to you two, and the others here, Cerb, VC, dickenson, Meetme, and of course Dee (who none of us can hide from 
).
Like Meetme, my one year is later this month (the 25th, to be exact). I'm not a counter, but I'd be hard pressed to find anyone who doesn't know their actual "quit date". And for me, I'm one of those oddballs who picked my "quit date" months in advance. Did the same thing for quitting cigarettes 25 years ago, this past Fourth of July (midnight, to be exact).
On the one hand I'm proud of myself, and everyone else, but on the other...well, I can only think of the "semi-controversial" Chris Rock bit when he talks of "someone" bragging about not being in jail... Rock screams: "YOU'RE NOT SUPPOSED TO BE IN JAIL!"
Gsp & ER, sorry to hear about all you've gone through and are going through. But I don't have to tell you, as you and all of us already know, not only does drinking not help in these situation, it actually makes EVERYTHING worse. My wife, who was suppose to quit with me, on the same day last July, is now approaching two weeks sober. I don't think she is "there" yet, but she actually said to me a few weeks ago, "it's just not working anymore", and "I finally realized I never really wanted to stop completely before, but now I do." Those words were music to my ears.
Anyway, glad to see you both back, and hi to all that I must admit I've never posted here enough for you to get to know me better. Just know, that even though I don't post often, I do read every single one on the "Class of July 2011" threads, so I do know you.
By the way, I email with stuartp from time to time, we actually don't live all that far from each other (NE US). He's doing "okay", the same but different BS in his life that we all have.
Well, I've never really posted much here, or on SR in general, just don't have a lot to say. Okay, that's not true, believe it or not, I'm quite the windbag, but I only post on SR when I feel I have something to say (usually I'm being an "instigator" - although, my wife has another name for it
). Today, I just wanted to say hi to you two, and the others here, Cerb, VC, dickenson, Meetme, and of course Dee (who none of us can hide from ).Like Meetme, my one year is later this month (the 25th, to be exact). I'm not a counter, but I'd be hard pressed to find anyone who doesn't know their actual "quit date". And for me, I'm one of those oddballs who picked my "quit date" months in advance. Did the same thing for quitting cigarettes 25 years ago, this past Fourth of July (midnight, to be exact).
On the one hand I'm proud of myself, and everyone else, but on the other...well, I can only think of the "semi-controversial" Chris Rock bit when he talks of "someone" bragging about not being in jail... Rock screams: "YOU'RE NOT SUPPOSED TO BE IN JAIL!"
Gsp & ER, sorry to hear about all you've gone through and are going through. But I don't have to tell you, as you and all of us already know, not only does drinking not help in these situation, it actually makes EVERYTHING worse. My wife, who was suppose to quit with me, on the same day last July, is now approaching two weeks sober. I don't think she is "there" yet, but she actually said to me a few weeks ago, "it's just not working anymore", and "I finally realized I never really wanted to stop completely before, but now I do." Those words were music to my ears.
Anyway, glad to see you both back, and hi to all that I must admit I've never posted here enough for you to get to know me better. Just know, that even though I don't post often, I do read every single one on the "Class of July 2011" threads, so I do know you.
By the way, I email with stuartp from time to time, we actually don't live all that far from each other (NE US). He's doing "okay", the same but different BS in his life that we all have.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: Florida
Posts: 1,945
Well today is my big day - one year off the booze. What started out as a wish not knowing what would happen or how the life of abstinence would be like has turn out pretty well. I'm getting to like the life of abstinence as I feel I am a better person and have come more into my own in realizing my potential. I also like the idea that I have better health, am saving money, and don't have to account to the alcohol monkey every day. Thanks to all for your insights and posts of encouragement and congratulations to the others in our class for making one year.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2008
Posts: 62
Hey Everyone.
Well back again!! Congrats Dickenson on 1 year!!! Inspirational!
After a couple of relapses here I am on just over 4 months sober!! Really pleased it has been easy to do this time (apart from the first week naturally). After the last relapse, which I hated all the way through!, I desperately wanted to be sober again! So just taking a day at a time but bot especially having any cravings.....and managed to attend my friends wedding without even being tempted!! My stepdaughters are out for the summer next week, looking forward to that.
Just wanted to check in and say Hi! Hope you are all good and well,
Kat xxx
Well back again!! Congrats Dickenson on 1 year!!! Inspirational!
After a couple of relapses here I am on just over 4 months sober!! Really pleased it has been easy to do this time (apart from the first week naturally). After the last relapse, which I hated all the way through!, I desperately wanted to be sober again! So just taking a day at a time but bot especially having any cravings.....and managed to attend my friends wedding without even being tempted!! My stepdaughters are out for the summer next week, looking forward to that.
Just wanted to check in and say Hi! Hope you are all good and well,
Kat xxx
Member
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: USA
Posts: 71
Congratulations Dickensen!!!! I like how you say you don't have to account to the alcohol monkey... It is so wonderful to be present at any time isn't it? I am so happy for you!
Hey thekat! Way to go on 4 months! My first go was about 3 months in 2010. Then July 2011 seems to be the real change. Two weeks from today will be the year. It is interesting when you get around drunk people now... most do not look like they are having fun at all. I don't miss it and want to stay sober.
I hope everyone has a great week!
Hey thekat! Way to go on 4 months! My first go was about 3 months in 2010. Then July 2011 seems to be the real change. Two weeks from today will be the year. It is interesting when you get around drunk people now... most do not look like they are having fun at all. I don't miss it and want to stay sober.
I hope everyone has a great week!
Eyes Open, No Fear
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: Canada
Posts: 287
Yay it's so nice to see some old familiar (some with new names!) back here. I think about all of you from time to time as well. At first I was keeping track of how many folks kind of 'dropped out' of our class. I found it a bit frightening at first since the pack seemed to weed itself out very quickly. But then it just made me more determined to be one of the ones who makes it, if for no other reason (like, you know, being proud of myself for actually doing it) than to make sure people know you CAN do it. I know now too that life without alcohol really actually certainly is much better. I can't imagine why I didn't quit earlier.
Thekat, meetmesober, wheresthefun, it's gret hearing from you all. gsp, I am so sorry to hear how hard the year has been for you. However, I am glad to see you back here and hopefully making your life better. I am pulling for you!
coming up to my one year mark very soon. Hard to believe it's been a whole year!
Thekat, meetmesober, wheresthefun, it's gret hearing from you all. gsp, I am so sorry to hear how hard the year has been for you. However, I am glad to see you back here and hopefully making your life better. I am pulling for you!
coming up to my one year mark very soon. Hard to believe it's been a whole year!
perpetual optimist
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Montana
Posts: 2,959
Lots of activity since I last checked in! Glad to see everyone! Congrats on all who are fighting the fight, no matter what your time!
I had my year on the 4th and it came and went rather quietly. What was I expecting? lol? A marching band?
Stay strong Julians!
I had my year on the 4th and it came and went rather quietly. What was I expecting? lol? A marching band?
Stay strong Julians!
Member
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: Florida
Posts: 1,945
Congratulations Vicious for making it a year. Thanks for all the morale support and words of wisdom that you provided along the way.
Gave blood on Monday. With no smoking or drinking had no weakness on Tuesday. In the old days it would take a few days to recover. Another thing to add to the Grateful list.
Gave blood on Monday. With no smoking or drinking had no weakness on Tuesday. In the old days it would take a few days to recover. Another thing to add to the Grateful list.
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