Class of July 2011 Part 5
Member
Join Date: Nov 2008
Posts: 62
thank you everyone,
I have been calling around counselors today, I have the choice of 2, waiting to speak to Nick when he gets home, but he said we will just have to do whatever it takes.
One of them is spanish and has dealt with a lot of people with alcohol and drug abuse, and she seems to understand a lot of what I'm going through, especially the vicious circle of alcohol problems leading to depression and anxiety, she said she is sort of tough love, she will set goals for me that I will be expected to achieve, and also on our second or third session she would like Nick to come in and speak with us giving his point of view which sounds like a good idea.
The other is English and offers the first session for free but didn't ask as many questions or tell me so much over the phone, so I don't know, I think I may go with the Spanish one. It's not cheap but we have decided to ask my Dad if he can help with it if we can't afford it all, which I'm sure he will.
Also the Spanish one is an ex marathon runner and she said one thing she will really be encouraging me to do is exercise and she knows a lot about the withdrawal from alcohol and drugs and suggested medication, but only if I am comfortable with it.
So all in all I think I'm heading in the right direction.
Hope you are all Ok guys, thank you so much for being there for me.
Kat xxxxx
I have been calling around counselors today, I have the choice of 2, waiting to speak to Nick when he gets home, but he said we will just have to do whatever it takes.
One of them is spanish and has dealt with a lot of people with alcohol and drug abuse, and she seems to understand a lot of what I'm going through, especially the vicious circle of alcohol problems leading to depression and anxiety, she said she is sort of tough love, she will set goals for me that I will be expected to achieve, and also on our second or third session she would like Nick to come in and speak with us giving his point of view which sounds like a good idea.
The other is English and offers the first session for free but didn't ask as many questions or tell me so much over the phone, so I don't know, I think I may go with the Spanish one. It's not cheap but we have decided to ask my Dad if he can help with it if we can't afford it all, which I'm sure he will.
Also the Spanish one is an ex marathon runner and she said one thing she will really be encouraging me to do is exercise and she knows a lot about the withdrawal from alcohol and drugs and suggested medication, but only if I am comfortable with it.
So all in all I think I'm heading in the right direction.
Hope you are all Ok guys, thank you so much for being there for me.
Kat xxxxx
Member
Join Date: Nov 2008
Posts: 62
meetmesober....so happy for you on your six months!!! go you!!!!
stu, thank you for your understanding!
Dee, as always thank you for just being there
I'm sorry I don't reply to you guys enough, I hop that will change as I get stronger again and who knows maybe one day I can help someone in the same situation as me.
we have decided to go with the Spanish counselor, she is coming on Monday but has already asked me to think about 2 questions, one is easy, why i slipped....well i know why, because i thought i could control it. The other seemed easy...what is missing? children of my own is my immediate answer...but now i'm thinking about it more, there has been a lot of things missing for a long time, my mum dying and not being near my family enough....i guess the whole point of therapy is opening up to someone else but also to yourself.
We also had a friend round tonight for tea, I had decided to tell him my problem as I class him as a really close friend, and I did and it turns out he just thought that when I wasn't drinking the last time it was because he thought first of all I was pregnant but after no sign of a bump he thought we must have been trying for a baby and that's why he said nothing more about it.
So when I told him, and it was all very emotional, he actually said he felt honored that I had chosen to tell him, I realize now telling the people around me helps, ok so I may lose a few....but my true friends will understand
stu, thank you for your understanding!
Dee, as always thank you for just being there
I'm sorry I don't reply to you guys enough, I hop that will change as I get stronger again and who knows maybe one day I can help someone in the same situation as me.
we have decided to go with the Spanish counselor, she is coming on Monday but has already asked me to think about 2 questions, one is easy, why i slipped....well i know why, because i thought i could control it. The other seemed easy...what is missing? children of my own is my immediate answer...but now i'm thinking about it more, there has been a lot of things missing for a long time, my mum dying and not being near my family enough....i guess the whole point of therapy is opening up to someone else but also to yourself.
We also had a friend round tonight for tea, I had decided to tell him my problem as I class him as a really close friend, and I did and it turns out he just thought that when I wasn't drinking the last time it was because he thought first of all I was pregnant but after no sign of a bump he thought we must have been trying for a baby and that's why he said nothing more about it.
So when I told him, and it was all very emotional, he actually said he felt honored that I had chosen to tell him, I realize now telling the people around me helps, ok so I may lose a few....but my true friends will understand
perpetual optimist
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Montana
Posts: 2,959
I think talking with someone will really open some things up for you Kat. I really think it will be helpful.
I hope everyone is well....stupid busy these days but things are good.
Keep moving forward!
I hope everyone is well....stupid busy these days but things are good.
Keep moving forward!
Member
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: Florida
Posts: 1,947
Moving right along without booze. Just bought a small fishing boat with the money saved by quitting smoking and drinking. Had the boat out on a maiden trip. Took an hour to find the way from the boat launch to the Caloosahatchie River though a mangrove maze. There was no markings indicating the main channel. Felt like I was on the African Queen. Was in some remote places and saw magnificent birds and fish (jumping out of the water). Plan to take the boat out of Matlacha next week with my cousin and maybe catch a fish.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: Florida
Posts: 1,947
Today marks 7 months. Feel great especially in the morning. Am grateful for the freedom of not having to plan my day around booze. Went out with my cousin fishing north of Matlasha. We brought home two speckled trout and a catfish. Also caught a sting ray. blow fish, too small trout, and a little blue crab who liked to dine on shrimp. Got the sting ray and blow fish out of the boat without getting bit or stung.
Eyes Open, No Fear
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: Canada
Posts: 287
Congrats on the 7 months, dickensen. I am right there with you, still doing well too. I don't even think very much about drinking or not drinking anymore, which is a relief. I just don't do it anymore 
things seem to have dried up (ha, get it!?) a bit around here. Hoping everyone is doing well. Stop in and say hello everyone!
things seem to have dried up (ha, get it!?) a bit around here. Hoping everyone is doing well. Stop in and say hello everyone!
perpetual optimist
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Montana
Posts: 2,959
Hello Julians.........still doing ok here......July 4th is still my quit date.........I still feel kind of weird or should I say resentful when I have to say no to some social things, but even that is getting easier as time goes by.......it's like drinking is the fiber that holds people together....it's a common interest that people can gather for.....and it's the interest I just can't have.......
Good to see everyone popping in!!
Ew, I got top of the page!! WOOT!!!
Member
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: Florida
Posts: 1,947
Vicious,
I've been to some social things and politely decline the drinks and just request diet soda. Maybe I raise some eyebrows due to my reputation, but nobody harrasses me about not drinking. With people I can trust I tell them that I am on the wagon for weight loss and health reasons and they don't bug me either. My method is to accept the world of alcohol that we live in the way it is. I've got beer, wine, gin, and whiskey from my stash of last July that I offer guests when they visit.
I've been to some social things and politely decline the drinks and just request diet soda. Maybe I raise some eyebrows due to my reputation, but nobody harrasses me about not drinking. With people I can trust I tell them that I am on the wagon for weight loss and health reasons and they don't bug me either. My method is to accept the world of alcohol that we live in the way it is. I've got beer, wine, gin, and whiskey from my stash of last July that I offer guests when they visit.
perpetual optimist
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Montana
Posts: 2,959
Oh I hear ya Dickensen........I don't avoid because I feel I will drink or be hassled. I guess I just don't want to be at a place where everyone else is drinking....and the functions for the work people are all at bars......and they are all there to drink.....a friend of mine has a bunch of gals over for this and that.........but wine or drinks is always the focal point..........it's just the way it is. Choosing not to go is easier.
Eyes Open, No Fear
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: Canada
Posts: 287
VC and Dickensen - I know where you both are coming from. I try to think about it as you do, Dickensen. Ultimately I know that no one will hassle me or really that anyone else gets a say in if or how much I drink or not, but like you, VC I still am occasionally resentful of not being able to drink and join in those social events. Usually I don't want to join because people get out of hand and it's annoying but sometimes, oh I do wish I could just drink a few....
perpetual optimist
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Montana
Posts: 2,959
I am sure it is just getting adjusted to my new way of life. 90% of the time it's ok. For instance, I have a friend turning 50. She invited me to a big bash at a winery. I have no desire to subject myself to such an uncomfortable atmosphere.....I have to do what feels right for me, right? It's frustrating sometimes......Dee,? Did you start to avoid such things during your first year of sobriety? What did you tell yourself to make yourself feel better about pulling back all the time? (if ya did.)
Administrator
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,442
Yeah, I did avoid such things - probably initially out of fear, but I soon realised I was not the same person I had been...
I did try. I played a few gigs for example - but sitting around and watching people get high or drunk didn't really do it for me anymore and my idea of fun underwent some drastic changes.
I changed my social circle too - I ended up with very few heavy drinking friends and a lot more non drinkers or normal drinkers.
I have to admit tho - I never felt a sense of loss.
I'd nearly killed myself - I was incredibly grateful to get a second chance.
I was ready for change, and whatever changes I've had to make have been more than worth it
I was finally done with drinking, I was completely done with being that guy, and I loved the new life I was building, and I grew to like the Dee I was (re) discovering.
I hope you guys will find that too
D
I did try. I played a few gigs for example - but sitting around and watching people get high or drunk didn't really do it for me anymore and my idea of fun underwent some drastic changes.
I changed my social circle too - I ended up with very few heavy drinking friends and a lot more non drinkers or normal drinkers.
I have to admit tho - I never felt a sense of loss.
I'd nearly killed myself - I was incredibly grateful to get a second chance.
I was ready for change, and whatever changes I've had to make have been more than worth it
I was finally done with drinking, I was completely done with being that guy, and I loved the new life I was building, and I grew to like the Dee I was (re) discovering.
I hope you guys will find that too
D
Member
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Rhode Island
Posts: 443
Originally Posted by Dee74 
I have to admit tho - I never felt a sense of loss.
I'd nearly killed myself - I was incredibly grateful to get a second chance.
I was ready for change, and whatever changes I've had to make have been more than worth it
I was finally done with drinking, I was completely done with being that guy, and I loved the new life I was building, and I grew to like the Dee I was (re) discovering.
I'd nearly killed myself - I was incredibly grateful to get a second chance.
I was ready for change, and whatever changes I've had to make have been more than worth it
I was finally done with drinking, I was completely done with being that guy, and I loved the new life I was building, and I grew to like the Dee I was (re) discovering.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: Florida
Posts: 1,947
Viscious,
For all of us not drinking is the most important issue on our daily agendas. You have to do what is right for you to make this happen. My comments were probably a little out of line as you are making it with your strategy and that what is important.
For all of us not drinking is the most important issue on our daily agendas. You have to do what is right for you to make this happen. My comments were probably a little out of line as you are making it with your strategy and that what is important.
perpetual optimist
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Montana
Posts: 2,959
Not out of line at all my friend, honest! I appreciate all the feedback........
I think I just have to completely get it that my life is now different. This is a good thing and I have to rebuild my friend base so to speak. I have to let myself be OK without going to certain events....grass is always greener and I imagine most of these gatherings I am talking about will have alot of unhappy campers the next day......
I need to focus on what I have gained with this new life.......NOT what I think I've lost.
I think I just have to completely get it that my life is now different. This is a good thing and I have to rebuild my friend base so to speak. I have to let myself be OK without going to certain events....grass is always greener and I imagine most of these gatherings I am talking about will have alot of unhappy campers the next day......
I need to focus on what I have gained with this new life.......NOT what I think I've lost.
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