Dee74

continues from here:

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...rt-2-a-20.html

D

Rusty Zipper

thanks for the new part dee

and have a great time least

Kablume

Welcome R&A!! Congrats on your 1 year!

See you on the 28th Least. Have a Merry Christmas!!

Thanks for the continuation Dee...

Another nice cake Itchy! I can feel the pants getting tighter.

Kablume

I'm trying this image thing to see if it works.

ReadyAndAble

It works—and a nice companion image to your avatar, too!

Have a great trip, least!

Itchy

Aha! Nice job Kablume! I can tell we are going to decorate this room more than before!


CYA Least!

Me I have been amused at some of my thoughts lately. I have actually thought occasionally that I could probably drink again if I really chose to , that I was not the same as before now.


I say amused because it is not a craving or even a real desire to go back to drinking for me. But it could lead to that for some who feel deprived. I am realizing that these thoughts are normal because I never really had cravings after I quit. My withdrawal was terrible and I never want to go through that again! Seriously. When I think these thoughts I say to myself, yeah probably, but since you are a non-drinker now and remember how trapped you felt for those last two years thinking you would die a drunk , drinking again, even if you could, is never gonna happen, because I am glad that is over. But I see where if I felt sorry for poor little ol me not being able to drink that I would be vulnerable. I love my sobriety like an old friend requiring no pretenses. Just me.

Random thoughts.

newby1961

Hey all,

Thanks Dee for your service as always

See ya Least Merry Christmas & remember don't worry your fur-babies will be fine

Hope everyone is dealing with all the holiday functions with a sober and fun attitude

lyddie

I am finding that this Christmas season, some family issues and an intense work load has had me wishing that I could drink the past few weeks. I won't. I am not going through all that again. It's not hard the way it was a challenge the first 6 months of sobriety but it is hard in a non craving but wishing way. It's a change for me because I have been blessed with so very very few thoughts of drinking the past 6 months.

Dee74

This season does seem a little stressful to me too Lyddie.

Is there anything you can do about your family stuff or your workload?
anything at all you can delegate?

D

LaFemme

Itchy...I can relate. I have these random thoughs that I could drink again and then I remember that alcohol is a vile poison that I have no interest in drinking. I consider these thoughts random faulty neurons firing...there's got to be some left from the old days after all.

I've actually got my act together this Christmas. I keep surprising myself... Who is this person? My first Christmas was about making it through sober...this one is about enjoying it sober.

It's also about knowing when to say "oh well". I've got a lot on my plate. And I seriously want to stop answering my phone since it seema like it's people adding to my pile. So I do my best..prioritize the stuff that has to get done...and let go some of the things I'd like to get done but there isn't time for

lyddie

Thanks for the suggestion Dee. Not much can be delegated but if I keep myself organized and take each task one at a time, the work stuff should be manageable. The family stuff is aging mother issues which my sister is handling (she lives the closest to my mother) but it just makes the season a bit more difficult. But hey the holidays will be over by January 2 - not too many more days.

ReadyAndAble

Me too. I am so grateful every day, I feel like Tim Robbins' character at the end of Shawshank Redemption, safe and at peace on a beach somewhere south of the border. Yet just in the past month, I've had a couple of random thoughts. "Hey, you could pick up a bottle for tonight, have a drink or two, and everything would be fine." It passes almost immediately, but it's interesting the thoughts come at all. I'm so much happier now—why on earth would I want to risk that? I can only assume that the addict mind is still within me, just much quieter than before.

I had a drinking dream night before last, the first one in a long time. I was at a bar and had one drink, and was immediately seized by the desire for another. I resisted and walked out of the bar, horrified that I had returned to the mental obsession with just one drink. I was so glad when I woke up and realized it was a dream. I do not ever want to go back to feeling trapped. Thanks for that post, Itchy.

Lyddie, family-related stress is as much a part of my holiday traditions as candy canes and wrapping paper. I wish I had a solution. But you're right; January is just around the corner.

Rusty Zipper

balance comes to mind here gang

doggonecarl

Thought I'd pop by, group, and wish everyone a Merry Christmas and a wonderful, sober, 2012.

Same here, LeFemme. None of that regret and remorse about not drinking, no feeling bad for Christmas' past that I ruined or that I suffered through in depression.

My sister is coming down from Vermont to visit and I am so looking forward to it. Of my four sisters, she's the closest to me in age and in spirit. I told her I was getting sober before I told my wife and she's been super supportive. I can't hardly believe how excited I am about Christmas.

Blessings to all.

--Carl

doggonecarl

I see a lot of posts about drinking dreams, but few about the other aspects of being a drunk, about the qualities that characterized our alcoholic behavior.

I had a dream I was at a party or gathering of some sort. I may or may not have been drinking, but others were. I had gone with woman who, in the dream, I refer to as my wife, a couple times as my girlfriend. During the party I start to flirt with another woman, kiss her, but when she comes on to me I beg off, citing I'm married.

When it is time to go I'm looking everywhere for my "wife" (who in no way resembles my real wife). When I find her, she's leaving with a friend. I ask why, she says because of the way I was looking at __________. And of course, I act incredulous, claim to not know what she's talking about, and when that doesn't work, start blaming her for her behavior.

What I didn't wake up with was remorse....I'm sober, but there is a lot of work left to do.

P.S. In real life, I've never cheated on my wife, nor thought about it.

Itchy

I am not surprised you are feeling it Dee. Here you are moderating a bunch of alcoholics and addicts in the week before Christmas and between the needy newbies and the sometimes crotchety old timers, as I said before it is like being a one armed paper hanger with a case of the crabs, ya don't know where to grab first! Sorry about that mental image, it's a southern thang.
Then add to that the sometimes rocky family and friends dramas all of us have, or lack of any which can sometimes be worse, and it is no wonder we all get a little antsy this time of year.

It is really nice to hear the same thoughts and responses about how easy it is to deny the thoughts of drinking from growing into more after being sober so long. I have the rest of my life sober, better late than never!:day6

R&A! Perfect analogy for how I feel too. He can never go back because the consequences are too great, but who would want to from that place anyway?

Carl me too!

La Femme,
Perzactly, I have the phone bit solved for me. For the last 20 years of my military career I had to be on an electronic leash 24/7. (Secure radio now secure cells) I swore I would never have one again once I retired. I am a techie but in one area I am a luddite. I got my wife a cell phone because she may need assistance when out. But I can handle myself and any car or truck issues without outside help. I will not, unless I go back to work and it is required and they pay for it, ever have a cell phone. I have VoIP for my house phones. It has voicemail. If someone wants to reach me, or needs to, they have to stop by physically, email me, or snail mail me. That is it. When I am driving I don't want to talk to anybody not riding in the car or truck. When I am shopping I don't want to be interrupted by anybody. I am retired, so is my schedule.

Lyddie, we also have aging parents here. That is why we came off the road from fulltime RVing at my SH's request. My parents are gone and hers are both living and getting on in years.

It sounds like we all are making it pretty well. Thanks for the reality check all! I have already deposited it in my karma account.

Dee74

oh, most of my stress this week is self induced - I took a little fall, Itchy - I'm a little banged up

It's been busy here tho for sure and some folks are a little pernickety but...'tis the season LOL

D

Chloe03

Hi all!

Getting through the holiday season booze-free can be rough...but going back to Day 1 is unfathomable!

When I have crazy thoughts that maybe one day I can drink again, I remind myself that the best predictor of future behavior is past behavior. Me drinking moderately...not a chance!

Thanks Itchy for getting the conversation started.

Itchy

Hope it wasn't too serious.

Dee74

kept me out of action for a few days - should be ok for the weekend tho

D