Class Of May 2011 Part 4
Administrator
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,428
Thats the danger concor - it feels completely normal...or it's even worse when you have a good time, or nothing bad happens.
That's the big bait of our condition - the hope that somehow we've been cured.
Alcohol and I have a toxic relationship that will never change, and I know that now.
I've fallen for it before - I was back at my worst so fast my head nearly snapped.
Don't fall for it Concor.
D
That's the big bait of our condition - the hope that somehow we've been cured.
Alcohol and I have a toxic relationship that will never change, and I know that now.
I've fallen for it before - I was back at my worst so fast my head nearly snapped.
Don't fall for it Concor.
D
MINEr
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: Bay Area, Ca
Posts: 505
Yeah, I'm still way too scared to even think about a beer. My experience in the hospital sank in real deep, thank god. You know what it was like at its worst Concor, try to always remember that time. Good luck.
Had an interesting meeting today, the lady doing the chair was the mother of the secretary. The secretary gave her the five minute notice to wrap it up, and the mom just turned and said"I know what the time is dear". Whole room lost it, twas classic.
Had an interesting meeting today, the lady doing the chair was the mother of the secretary. The secretary gave her the five minute notice to wrap it up, and the mom just turned and said"I know what the time is dear". Whole room lost it, twas classic.
~sb
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: MD
Posts: 15,964
I am in that position of neutrality. If I had to buy some for someone, it wouldn't bother me, but you won't find me drinking it; that is poison for me. I pretended to be a normal drinker for way too long (25+ years). I now have the pleasure of watching my cousin post pics of her drinks on facebook. She's already been hospitalized once that I know of. She has too much money and time on her hands.... It's sad to see. She's a year younger than I.
I prefer sobriety today as it's a new "trip" for me and I like it. Let us know how it works out, concur. I agree with Dee, though. Be very careful! We need you to stick around!
Everyone, have a wonderful day today!
I prefer sobriety today as it's a new "trip" for me and I like it. Let us know how it works out, concur. I agree with Dee, though. Be very careful! We need you to stick around!
Everyone, have a wonderful day today!
MINEr
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: Bay Area, Ca
Posts: 505
If someone can be a normal drinker, more power to them, enjoy the beer I'm not drinking. If someone is in trouble and needs help, I'll be there for them. Me, I did my time, I played the game, and booze won. Now I'm onto another game, it's called healing. Have a great day folks.
~sb
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: MD
Posts: 15,964
"a glass of Merlot with dinner tonight" concur, I hope you are well!
"Yeah, a reallllly tall ice tea glass filled to the brim for me, please. Hold the dinner. Oh, and leave the case next to me. Thanks!"
Sorry. Not enough for me to drink today. I've had my share. I am enjoying being sober. Now, if we can just get a weed buzz....and still be sober! I still miss that! My stomach hurt this past weekend. Pain is not something I like and I always self-medicated, so yeah, I kept thinking about it, but I didn't act on it! I am feeling well today. A friend said a stomach bug was going around, I thought it was the food I ate.
Keep staying stopped you Miners! We can do this!
(For those who have slipped, remember I've been quitting for a looooong time, so this time in, I hope to stay stopped for good! Keep coming to SR and let us know you are okay!) I was desperate as there was really nothing to live for. Today, there is much to live for!
My friend, who has had a hard time staying stopped, called today and said she thinks she is done. Her beer or two has turned into 6 a night. She doesn't want to go back to her 12 a night. sighs. I hope she's done, she isn't seeing the damage she's caused herself, she's still dramatic about all of it and blaming everyone and everything but her drinking. I'll let you know what transpires.
I'm off this week for Spring Break. I ran around window shopping. I spent $4 on new nail polish so I'll be self- manicuring for a bit.
I also spent less than ten bucks at the dollar store, so the cat box isn't so smelly, got a silver-looking tray for the bathroom (looks pretty) and some candy (yikes!), and a fortune puzzle I will attempt, then maybe buy some for some friends (75 different fortunes to choose from! It's all a surprise!).
I had a nice day. Laundry tomorrow and then off to volunteer some time. Spring cleaning on Wednesday and home group meeting. More window shopping on Thursday. I'm looking for an inexpensive shoe rack. The week is flying by!
"Yeah, a reallllly tall ice tea glass filled to the brim for me, please. Hold the dinner. Oh, and leave the case next to me. Thanks!"
Sorry. Not enough for me to drink today. I've had my share. I am enjoying being sober. Now, if we can just get a weed buzz....and still be sober! I still miss that! My stomach hurt this past weekend. Pain is not something I like and I always self-medicated, so yeah, I kept thinking about it, but I didn't act on it! I am feeling well today. A friend said a stomach bug was going around, I thought it was the food I ate.
Keep staying stopped you Miners! We can do this!
(For those who have slipped, remember I've been quitting for a looooong time, so this time in, I hope to stay stopped for good! Keep coming to SR and let us know you are okay!) I was desperate as there was really nothing to live for. Today, there is much to live for!
My friend, who has had a hard time staying stopped, called today and said she thinks she is done. Her beer or two has turned into 6 a night. She doesn't want to go back to her 12 a night. sighs. I hope she's done, she isn't seeing the damage she's caused herself, she's still dramatic about all of it and blaming everyone and everything but her drinking. I'll let you know what transpires.
I'm off this week for Spring Break. I ran around window shopping. I spent $4 on new nail polish so I'll be self- manicuring for a bit.
I also spent less than ten bucks at the dollar store, so the cat box isn't so smelly, got a silver-looking tray for the bathroom (looks pretty) and some candy (yikes!), and a fortune puzzle I will attempt, then maybe buy some for some friends (75 different fortunes to choose from! It's all a surprise!).I had a nice day. Laundry tomorrow and then off to volunteer some time. Spring cleaning on Wednesday and home group meeting. More window shopping on Thursday. I'm looking for an inexpensive shoe rack. The week is flying by!
Member
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Here, Now
Posts: 4,268
Oh man miners you have no idea how bad I feel and the hole that I dug with my relapse. Makes me want to cry or kick myself or both. Well day 26 and couning. Nothing to do but keep sober and keep moving forward. Hope you all are doing well.
MINEr
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: Bay Area, Ca
Posts: 505
Keep on moving forward fitz, you know it's possible by the many that have gone before you.
Had a very moving experience today. Was with my best friend, and we went to this cemetary where up on the hill of it, you can see the whole SF bay area. While up there, we started talking about my sobriety. She was my bartender for the last five years before i got sober, and was with me everyday in the hospital as I was detoxing/almost dying. She was in some sort of mood, and started talking about the changes in me, saying how much more positive and hopeful I was, that she loves to see me so happy. I went into extreme detail of how things have been changing in my heart, through stepwork and therapy, and how I am making some serious progress in healing all those age old wounds. It was very deep and very wonderful. I am so grateful to have such great people in my life who know me, and care about me deeply, I could not do this without them. I think the spirits of the cemetary were speaking, and got us to both dig deep and be honest, something I'm not used to outside of the rooms. It was so very refreshing to be that honest with a non AA. She reminded me today that I am on the right path, no matter how hard it may seem some days. I don't have problems with the drink much, but the repairing of the damage and the regret of the past just owns me. To hear that from someone very dear to me was such an inspiration to keep solid with my program. I hope you are all staying honest and true to yourselves and others, let the love flow freely.
Had a very moving experience today. Was with my best friend, and we went to this cemetary where up on the hill of it, you can see the whole SF bay area. While up there, we started talking about my sobriety. She was my bartender for the last five years before i got sober, and was with me everyday in the hospital as I was detoxing/almost dying. She was in some sort of mood, and started talking about the changes in me, saying how much more positive and hopeful I was, that she loves to see me so happy. I went into extreme detail of how things have been changing in my heart, through stepwork and therapy, and how I am making some serious progress in healing all those age old wounds. It was very deep and very wonderful. I am so grateful to have such great people in my life who know me, and care about me deeply, I could not do this without them. I think the spirits of the cemetary were speaking, and got us to both dig deep and be honest, something I'm not used to outside of the rooms. It was so very refreshing to be that honest with a non AA. She reminded me today that I am on the right path, no matter how hard it may seem some days. I don't have problems with the drink much, but the repairing of the damage and the regret of the past just owns me. To hear that from someone very dear to me was such an inspiration to keep solid with my program. I hope you are all staying honest and true to yourselves and others, let the love flow freely.
Trudging that road.
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Seattle Wa
Posts: 6,840
Hey Miners,
Been really physically sick lately so haven't been around. I missed you guys all the same.
Fitz that is exactly how I felt on my last relapse but trust me there are lots of us who have had devastating relapses but the one thing we all have in common is thank God we are all here so far to talk about it.
I believe its up to us to stick around to be supportive to the next person who feels this way. You are very much a part of this group and for you to leave this group and go to another in my opinion is sad cause I know so many of us would miss ya.
You will always be a Miner even if you did relapse..
Hope everyone has a great night.
Been really physically sick lately so haven't been around. I missed you guys all the same.
Fitz that is exactly how I felt on my last relapse but trust me there are lots of us who have had devastating relapses but the one thing we all have in common is thank God we are all here so far to talk about it.
I believe its up to us to stick around to be supportive to the next person who feels this way. You are very much a part of this group and for you to leave this group and go to another in my opinion is sad cause I know so many of us would miss ya.
You will always be a Miner even if you did relapse..
Hope everyone has a great night.
~sb
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: MD
Posts: 15,964
Feel better, Newby! Heal well.
I've had a bad stomach this week, but moving along. Not sure what it is, sponsor said "Hay fever" but that's the typical response! Feeling a little better.
Concur, I was making fun of how I would order at dinner, I hope you realize that.
Isn't nature wonderful, Camedown?!!
Enjoy today, everyone!!
I've had a bad stomach this week, but moving along. Not sure what it is, sponsor said "Hay fever" but that's the typical response! Feeling a little better.
Concur, I was making fun of how I would order at dinner, I hope you realize that.
Isn't nature wonderful, Camedown?!!
Enjoy today, everyone!!
MINEr
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: Bay Area, Ca
Posts: 505
So I finally got called on to share at my mens group tonight. Kinda intimidating to speak in front of over 100 alcoholics, I could feel my heartbeat in my toes. I think it went ok though, a couple of the grizzled thanked me after the meeting, whether it was out of gratitude or sympathy I don't know, but it felt good to get it out of the way finally. I have been dreading it for months now.
~sb
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: MD
Posts: 15,964
I had fun tracking my shoe rack this week. I mapped out it's progress and I was able to pick it up before I even got my email saying it was in. So, I then went to the site and put in a positive review. I took a pic and as I was taking it, the cat decided it was time to walk into my closet, she saw the shoe rack and turned to look at it and was in the pic! So, she is now online at that site's review area!
Who said life was boring? It is what you make of it! I find pleasure in the small things today.
I also got netflix trial. My computer is too slow (or is it the connection?), so I want a newer one. Want. I used to want to drink. So, I decided I need to get bifocals and stop pretending I can see things. I had to use two different pairs of glasses at work one day.
So, first, eyeglasses, then I will put money away each payday so I can purchase a laptop. I am using netflix on my phone, so that is too cool! I'll see if it works on a bus, but I may end up missing my stop!
I met with my sponsor last night (that's like having a reallllly long meeting or two) and we talked and ended up eating out at a newly opened restaurant. What a great find that place is! Seafood. Yummy! For seafood, the prices are okay. The "side dish" of asparagus was only 5 tiny pieces. Seriously? Okay, it did look pretty.... Artistic food...
My sponsor said that I am further along in almost 11 months of sobriety than they were... I said, "But I have 25 years in and out of AA" and the response was, "But you have 25 years of unlearning to do." Yeah, AA isn't always on target, although they try to stick with it. I am quite happy with the sponsor I have.
It's a beautifully sunny day in Maryland, the air a little cool, but the windows are open. I cleaned the tub, but I have to do it again to get some hard stuff off so then they can put their "finish" on it as it is chipping and I don't want drain pipe problems. Oh, the joys sobriety brings! It beats taking a shower and then finding out there's a problem with drainage!
Have a wonderful day! Happy Easter! Happy Bank Weekend! Happy Passover!
Who said life was boring? It is what you make of it! I find pleasure in the small things today.
I also got netflix trial. My computer is too slow (or is it the connection?), so I want a newer one. Want. I used to want to drink. So, I decided I need to get bifocals and stop pretending I can see things. I had to use two different pairs of glasses at work one day.
So, first, eyeglasses, then I will put money away each payday so I can purchase a laptop. I am using netflix on my phone, so that is too cool! I'll see if it works on a bus, but I may end up missing my stop!
I met with my sponsor last night (that's like having a reallllly long meeting or two) and we talked and ended up eating out at a newly opened restaurant. What a great find that place is! Seafood. Yummy! For seafood, the prices are okay. The "side dish" of asparagus was only 5 tiny pieces. Seriously? Okay, it did look pretty.... Artistic food...
My sponsor said that I am further along in almost 11 months of sobriety than they were... I said, "But I have 25 years in and out of AA" and the response was, "But you have 25 years of unlearning to do." Yeah, AA isn't always on target, although they try to stick with it. I am quite happy with the sponsor I have.
It's a beautifully sunny day in Maryland, the air a little cool, but the windows are open. I cleaned the tub, but I have to do it again to get some hard stuff off so then they can put their "finish" on it as it is chipping and I don't want drain pipe problems. Oh, the joys sobriety brings! It beats taking a shower and then finding out there's a problem with drainage!
Have a wonderful day! Happy Easter! Happy Bank Weekend! Happy Passover!
MINEr
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: Bay Area, Ca
Posts: 505
Happy Easter all!!!!
I must be doing something right, at the end of yesterday's meeting, one guy asked me to chair a meeting and a younger guy asked me to sponsor him. Who figured all I had to do was pray and follow directions.
I must be doing something right, at the end of yesterday's meeting, one guy asked me to chair a meeting and a younger guy asked me to sponsor him. Who figured all I had to do was pray and follow directions.
~sb
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: MD
Posts: 15,964
That's too cool, Camedown! Congrats!! Prayer does it!
So, I pulled out the old computer I bought on ebay while I was drinking. I couldn't get it to work right. Maybe it was me that wasn't working right. So, I'm typing on it as we speak. I will see how it works compared to that older one. I believe it's also my connection, but we shall see. Netflix trial has been very slow. I had a laptop and a phone and would alternate between the two. 2 hours to watch a 45 minute show! LOL Yeah, it did take that long. sighs
Well, I can always sell both of these, can't I? Between the 2, I spent about the same amount that I would have on a brand new one. Convoluted thinking....
I have done some research on SSRI's and alcohol and found some interesting links. Glad I am not feeling depressed since I gave up the alcohol. If you need it, take it, but wow! Yale has an interesting study out.
I am making spinach and crab stuffed ravioli (wonton wrappers), tabouli, and a strawberry coffee cake between today and tomorrow. And my bathroom is sparkling, even though the tub is losing it's tub film---they put something on it to make it look new, but they didn't do a good job. I complained in January, Febuary, and in March, along with the fridge problems. The tiny scratch on the tub surface is enlarging, so I have pieces to bring to them! Oh, such is life.
Happy Day!
So, I pulled out the old computer I bought on ebay while I was drinking. I couldn't get it to work right. Maybe it was me that wasn't working right. So, I'm typing on it as we speak. I will see how it works compared to that older one. I believe it's also my connection, but we shall see. Netflix trial has been very slow. I had a laptop and a phone and would alternate between the two. 2 hours to watch a 45 minute show! LOL Yeah, it did take that long. sighs
Well, I can always sell both of these, can't I? Between the 2, I spent about the same amount that I would have on a brand new one. Convoluted thinking....
I have done some research on SSRI's and alcohol and found some interesting links. Glad I am not feeling depressed since I gave up the alcohol. If you need it, take it, but wow! Yale has an interesting study out.
I am making spinach and crab stuffed ravioli (wonton wrappers), tabouli, and a strawberry coffee cake between today and tomorrow. And my bathroom is sparkling, even though the tub is losing it's tub film---they put something on it to make it look new, but they didn't do a good job. I complained in January, Febuary, and in March, along with the fridge problems. The tiny scratch on the tub surface is enlarging, so I have pieces to bring to them! Oh, such is life.
Happy Day!
MINEr
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: Bay Area, Ca
Posts: 505
Spinach and crab stuffed ravioli? Yes please. Just tell me what time dinner is, being a professional, I guarantee I can cook something nice up in return. Interesting meeting today, topic was steps 4 and 5, and it was a low turnout due to Easter, about ten peeps. Somehow everyone felt more comfortable being that it was all regulars of the meeting, and the shares went deeper than usual, I learned a hell of a lot about my fellow home groupers. God I love this program so much. Have a great day!!!
~sb
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: MD
Posts: 15,964
So, I can't get that other laptop to turn on again....was just a fluke... (only got it to turn on 3 times since I got it on ebay--drunk--never returned it in time) Netflix, is way too slow on this laptop, can kinda get it on my phone. I did get to use it waiting on the bus and then through the crying child on the bus home tonight!
I worked today, 4 hours and will do so the next 3 days. 4 hours is better than none.
Not sure about what is going on at this school, though, lots of staff turnover is happening....I'd love to get hired as full time permanent employee, no matter what, but that is still in the air...
Working on towards 11 months.... this coming Monday, although I prefer to live in today, but it's cool!
I hope you are all well! Camedown, sounds like things are moving along for you, too! Way to go!
I didn't make that ravioli, yet (it's actually wonton wrappers and everything is waiting in the fridge--can of crab not yet opened, I'll post a pic). Oh, gee, netflix is "buffering" again.....(I don't think my HP wants me online or in front of a boob tube so much, I'll have to change my routine up soon!)
Happy sober now! I love you all!
I worked today, 4 hours and will do so the next 3 days. 4 hours is better than none.
Not sure about what is going on at this school, though, lots of staff turnover is happening....I'd love to get hired as full time permanent employee, no matter what, but that is still in the air...
Working on towards 11 months.... this coming Monday, although I prefer to live in today, but it's cool!
I hope you are all well! Camedown, sounds like things are moving along for you, too! Way to go!
I didn't make that ravioli, yet (it's actually wonton wrappers and everything is waiting in the fridge--can of crab not yet opened, I'll post a pic). Oh, gee, netflix is "buffering" again.....(I don't think my HP wants me online or in front of a boob tube so much, I'll have to change my routine up soon!)
Happy sober now! I love you all!
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