Class of June 2011 Part Two
Member
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: MI
Posts: 720
Good Morning Classmates!
It's officially day 7. Last night I went to bed with a headache. But, again, I knew why. But, it was a good headache, reminded me of all the headaches, I gave myself. Over and over again. Still there a little bit this morning, but it's nothing a nice walk with 2 labs and 2 beagles won't cure. Oh, and a nice cup of freshly brewed coffee.
I will be telling my husband this evening. Once again last night, he said "hey do you want me to pick up one of those cases of beer with the Lime ones in it". I stuttered back "uh....no....I'm good, but thanks!". Argggghhhh!!! Then after our evening tub (jetted tubs are wonderful - what a way to end the day - usually by tub time I was drunk, so sober, these are really relaxing), I came down the hallway to say goodnight to you all, and he comes down the hallway, "whatcha doing?". Once again, I stammered my way through "uh....just emailing work my hours". Arrrggggghhhhh!!! Will be good to not be "hiding" from him on this. But, still kind of anxious.
He also wants to go to camp with the gang this weekend. The bigtime drinking gang. Friday night is always a big hitter - everyone drinks, drinks, and drinks some more. They drink allllll weekend long. You should see the pile of empties after this type of weekend. It's about a dozen of them total - and honestly, good friends - would give you the shirt off their backs. I know they wouldn't question me not drinking (even though I would not tell them why - at this point I don't need them to know - as I believe most of them have drinking problems, and also drink and drive too much, which I have done, so I'm not throwing stones).
When he brought it up last night, I said "can't we just pop in on the motorcycles". He said he'd love to camp and would go Friday if I didn't want to go. Our local 4th parade is on Saturday and we always go to honor our vets and celebrate the holiday. I said, you'll miss the parade and be hungover. He said I'll make it. I really want this whole weekend with him doing various things, am I being selfish? I'm pretty confident I can get through being around these friends partying....but, I just don't want to spend that much time there.
Outside of this, I woke up again, with a big smile on my face. This is crazy how good I feel. Even with the occasional headache. I'm a little scattered at times, and the cravings are still crazy.
Streamwader (congrats on day 12!) - you now have me keeping track of every one. First thing I did this morning, is wrote down every one on our thread as best I could. Then I did my best to write down what day they are at today, where they are from, and all that. And yep, it will go in a spreadsheet. That is truly my overly-anal, organized, OCD side of me. No one in my life would be surprised. Plus, when I tell my husband, and I want to say here are the angels in my life.
Raquell - don't hate yourself for being an alcoholic. Love yourself for knowing you are and you can change that. And yes, find another doctor.
Chimp what a great post this morning! I agree....because we can recognize our problem, we know how to see the beauty and ugly in more things now. I've always said "get outside...there are miracles out there for you to see and enjoy every day". Man has made a lot of really neat things (like this computer, so I can chat with you great people), but there's no way we could make what's out there. And all of it is free and something to appreciate. I find more peace in the outdoors than any where. But, to enjoy it sober is even more rewarding. I used to wake to the wrens thinking...."oh let me sleep". Now, I say "thanks for getting my butt out of bed". And you're right about how different we all are, but with sharing this same problem, we have nothing to hide. It's crazy, how we all put something on this thread, read each other's and say "that's me, that's me!". And next time your Dad cooks breakfast, let him know there are at least 15 more of us that would love to join in.
Looking forward to the weekend and the challenge that will come with it.
Be well!
It's officially day 7. Last night I went to bed with a headache. But, again, I knew why. But, it was a good headache, reminded me of all the headaches, I gave myself. Over and over again. Still there a little bit this morning, but it's nothing a nice walk with 2 labs and 2 beagles won't cure. Oh, and a nice cup of freshly brewed coffee.
I will be telling my husband this evening. Once again last night, he said "hey do you want me to pick up one of those cases of beer with the Lime ones in it". I stuttered back "uh....no....I'm good, but thanks!". Argggghhhh!!! Then after our evening tub (jetted tubs are wonderful - what a way to end the day - usually by tub time I was drunk, so sober, these are really relaxing), I came down the hallway to say goodnight to you all, and he comes down the hallway, "whatcha doing?". Once again, I stammered my way through "uh....just emailing work my hours". Arrrggggghhhhh!!! Will be good to not be "hiding" from him on this. But, still kind of anxious.
He also wants to go to camp with the gang this weekend. The bigtime drinking gang. Friday night is always a big hitter - everyone drinks, drinks, and drinks some more. They drink allllll weekend long. You should see the pile of empties after this type of weekend. It's about a dozen of them total - and honestly, good friends - would give you the shirt off their backs. I know they wouldn't question me not drinking (even though I would not tell them why - at this point I don't need them to know - as I believe most of them have drinking problems, and also drink and drive too much, which I have done, so I'm not throwing stones).
When he brought it up last night, I said "can't we just pop in on the motorcycles". He said he'd love to camp and would go Friday if I didn't want to go. Our local 4th parade is on Saturday and we always go to honor our vets and celebrate the holiday. I said, you'll miss the parade and be hungover. He said I'll make it. I really want this whole weekend with him doing various things, am I being selfish? I'm pretty confident I can get through being around these friends partying....but, I just don't want to spend that much time there.
Outside of this, I woke up again, with a big smile on my face. This is crazy how good I feel. Even with the occasional headache. I'm a little scattered at times, and the cravings are still crazy.
Streamwader (congrats on day 12!) - you now have me keeping track of every one. First thing I did this morning, is wrote down every one on our thread as best I could. Then I did my best to write down what day they are at today, where they are from, and all that. And yep, it will go in a spreadsheet. That is truly my overly-anal, organized, OCD side of me. No one in my life would be surprised. Plus, when I tell my husband, and I want to say here are the angels in my life.
Raquell - don't hate yourself for being an alcoholic. Love yourself for knowing you are and you can change that. And yes, find another doctor.
Chimp what a great post this morning! I agree....because we can recognize our problem, we know how to see the beauty and ugly in more things now. I've always said "get outside...there are miracles out there for you to see and enjoy every day". Man has made a lot of really neat things (like this computer, so I can chat with you great people), but there's no way we could make what's out there. And all of it is free and something to appreciate. I find more peace in the outdoors than any where. But, to enjoy it sober is even more rewarding. I used to wake to the wrens thinking...."oh let me sleep". Now, I say "thanks for getting my butt out of bed". And you're right about how different we all are, but with sharing this same problem, we have nothing to hide. It's crazy, how we all put something on this thread, read each other's and say "that's me, that's me!". And next time your Dad cooks breakfast, let him know there are at least 15 more of us that would love to join in.
Looking forward to the weekend and the challenge that will come with it.
Be well!
Member
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: La La Land
Posts: 503
Good Morning Everyone,
I just heard about this thread. I would love to join you all. I have been sober for 4 days. Do I need to join in a certain way?? Just looking for some extra support and I love what I see here
I am not very technical minded so any help would be greatly appreciated.
I just heard about this thread. I would love to join you all. I have been sober for 4 days. Do I need to join in a certain way?? Just looking for some extra support and I love what I see here
I am not very technical minded so any help would be greatly appreciated.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: MI
Posts: 720
Good Morning and Welcome to our Class! Nothing special to do to "join" - you are in! You'll love these people. Congrats on Day 4. Read and post as much as you can. When you're happy, sad, good day, bad day, or if you just feel like "chatting".
Be well!
Be well!
one of many
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: Ellisville, FL
Posts: 200
SweetNovember don't take the prejudice of your doctor personally or let it hinder your recovery. Our society has passed moral judgement on the alcoholic because of ignorance. We suffer from a real disease, just as real as a broken or crippled spine, but I suppose there has always been prejudice against cripples and the physically handicapped as well. The important thing to remember is that you have brothers and sisters here in recovery who know what you're going through and support you. We can make it down this road together!
Member
Join Date: Jun 2011
Posts: 426
Good morning classmates! Welcome Tuesday24 - glad to see you here. We have a great thing going here. Well, it's day 25. Not the longest I've ever gone, but the strongest I've felt. I know my class and SR have certainly been the reason.
Beaulah - your posts rock. You are a great person with all of your insight and encouragement. I hope that you will be able to stay away from any inner conflict this weekend with the campers. Not even that you would be tempted, but damn it sounds difficult to be with people who will be drinking all day. Best of luck, let us know how it goes! And with telling your husband tonight. We're here for you!
Sweetnovember I'm glad that headache finally went away!! Raquell - hope your day turns around for you. Stay strong. Keep posting.
Classical, I love reading how the universe is aligning for you in your career. Keep us posted. I was a music major for 1.5 years in college before I switched to finance (what a smooth transistion..eek) and have so many friends in the arts. I love hearing about your progress! Ride this wave, friend!
Well I caught up last night by phone with an old friend from 20 years ago who's going to be in the area in a few weeks. How weird is this - HE just quit drinking around the same time I did. We didn't get into labels or anything but we had so much to share. Wow, was that cool. We always talk about the friends that still drink, it was so coincidental that he and I reconnected and are both basically on the same path. Super cool, universe.
I'll be checking in. Hope everyone has a great day. I'm going to start my journey on quitting smoking in the next few days.......
Beaulah - your posts rock. You are a great person with all of your insight and encouragement. I hope that you will be able to stay away from any inner conflict this weekend with the campers. Not even that you would be tempted, but damn it sounds difficult to be with people who will be drinking all day. Best of luck, let us know how it goes! And with telling your husband tonight. We're here for you!
Sweetnovember I'm glad that headache finally went away!! Raquell - hope your day turns around for you. Stay strong. Keep posting.
Classical, I love reading how the universe is aligning for you in your career. Keep us posted. I was a music major for 1.5 years in college before I switched to finance (what a smooth transistion..eek) and have so many friends in the arts. I love hearing about your progress! Ride this wave, friend!
Well I caught up last night by phone with an old friend from 20 years ago who's going to be in the area in a few weeks. How weird is this - HE just quit drinking around the same time I did. We didn't get into labels or anything but we had so much to share. Wow, was that cool. We always talk about the friends that still drink, it was so coincidental that he and I reconnected and are both basically on the same path. Super cool, universe.
I'll be checking in. Hope everyone has a great day. I'm going to start my journey on quitting smoking in the next few days.......
Member
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: Kent, UK
Posts: 351
Hi Tuesday and welcome!
Steamwader, I think it is brilliant that you are creating a spreadsheet. This is probably my
third attempt to live soberly. I know the moment I stop reading and writing on these posts I am lost. Is that true for others?
Instant, thank you for reminding me that I enjoy getting slammed. I do. It is a massive release, massive. Pure escapism, until the morning after when I am confronted with the actual or imagined realities of the previous night.
SweetNovember, it is a beautiful feeling isn't it? I am at my Dad's this week. He drinks a lot and we often get hammered and listen to music and talk into the early hours. Great fun but I hated the mornings. I know sobriety here and I know that tomorrow will be great. I also know I'll be on here for much of the night, just in case!
Classical, I have just programmer into my diary my sobriety dates, week, month, six months, year. I am 30 in a few months. I will hit that milestone and the rest sober. You are an inspiration!
Buelah, whatever you choose to do I think you are incredibly strong. I am thinking of you!
Enjoy all!
Steamwader, I think it is brilliant that you are creating a spreadsheet. This is probably my
third attempt to live soberly. I know the moment I stop reading and writing on these posts I am lost. Is that true for others?
Instant, thank you for reminding me that I enjoy getting slammed. I do. It is a massive release, massive. Pure escapism, until the morning after when I am confronted with the actual or imagined realities of the previous night.
SweetNovember, it is a beautiful feeling isn't it? I am at my Dad's this week. He drinks a lot and we often get hammered and listen to music and talk into the early hours. Great fun but I hated the mornings. I know sobriety here and I know that tomorrow will be great. I also know I'll be on here for much of the night, just in case!
Classical, I have just programmer into my diary my sobriety dates, week, month, six months, year. I am 30 in a few months. I will hit that milestone and the rest sober. You are an inspiration!
Buelah, whatever you choose to do I think you are incredibly strong. I am thinking of you!
Enjoy all!
Member
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: Colorado
Posts: 513
Good morning my friends - well onward through Day 4. This weekend will be my toughest yet. I have neighbors coming over tomorrow that he is a CFO of a new vodka company and wants us to taste it. Well I invited another neighbor and she just told me yesterday she doesn't drink! So I'm a bit excited I will have a friend there that I can fall back on. My excuse is running a 5k in a couple weeks so I think that will work for a while!
As to Sweetnovember - hang in there - some docs are jerks. Find one you can relate to with a good bedside mannor and stay with them. The headaches will stop!
Classical - what great news! You are a super star in the biz - keep going!
Tuesday - my Day 4 friend - lets make it through the weekend. We can do it! Wiggle I believe is also on Day 4. :-)
Buelah my friend - you and I have been on this site in secret from our husbands! I too jump every time I'm on at home and he askes what I'm doing. UGH So frustrating. But I did tell him last night I just can no longer drink and the reasons why. He brushes it off as usual, I've said it before. But I guess the proof will be in the days right?
Stream - I blame you for my crazy dreams! hehe They are still happening!
I'm on all day today - I hope everyone makes it through another day. I've decided to do a boot camp workout tonight during the famous "witching hour". I hope that helps!
As to Sweetnovember - hang in there - some docs are jerks. Find one you can relate to with a good bedside mannor and stay with them. The headaches will stop!
Classical - what great news! You are a super star in the biz - keep going!
Tuesday - my Day 4 friend - lets make it through the weekend. We can do it! Wiggle I believe is also on Day 4. :-)
Buelah my friend - you and I have been on this site in secret from our husbands! I too jump every time I'm on at home and he askes what I'm doing. UGH So frustrating. But I did tell him last night I just can no longer drink and the reasons why. He brushes it off as usual, I've said it before. But I guess the proof will be in the days right?
Stream - I blame you for my crazy dreams! hehe They are still happening!
I'm on all day today - I hope everyone makes it through another day. I've decided to do a boot camp workout tonight during the famous "witching hour". I hope that helps!
Member
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: La La Land
Posts: 503
Thanks for the warm welcome everyone Yes, this holiday long weekend will be a struggle for me too. I am lying very low this weekend... I know that I am not emotionally strong enough to put myself in a position where alcohol will be present. I am proud of myself for identifying boundaries.. something that is very new to me
Yes, this holiday long weekend will be a struggle for me too. I am lying very low this weekend... I know that I am not emotionally strong enough to put myself in a position where alcohol will be present. I am proud of myself for identifying boundaries.. something that is very new to me
Member
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: MI
Posts: 720
Squishy, funny you mentioined that about our husbands not knowing. The other day, I went to log out and didn't hit ok so it was "froze" on my screen. My hubby came home and he picks up my mail from the shop I work for so I don't have to run to town (which is nice). And he always drops it on the kitchen counter. That day he dropped it on my desk, and there was this screen. I saw his eyes just glance at it, but he could care less about the computer so I don't think he really "saw" it. I about pee'd my pants. I ran in afterwards and got the screen off. I figured, ah well...he'll find out soon enough. I'm prepared for if he still drinks...but, I'm hoping he'll follow my path. Remember, it's about your health and wellbeing first, and in turn, you will be better for your children. Your husband has to make his mind up on his own...as we all know that is what we had to do.
And Chimp - I agree, about wondering if I'll feel lost, say when I go canoeing for a weekend, or go on a trip with no computer and don't get to read or post. I guess, we'll have to keep pushing during those times so when we return we can get back online and tell everyone how we are doing, and better yet to see how every one else is doing. Isn't it funny...I used to run to my computer in the morning terrified about what emails I sent out with a loaded brain. Now I run to the computer in the morning to see how all our classmates did! I love seeing people on line on this website from 2004, 2007, etc. That will be us, helping others cope as we are.
Have a wonderful day every one. I have to take two dogs to the vet.
Be well!
And Chimp - I agree, about wondering if I'll feel lost, say when I go canoeing for a weekend, or go on a trip with no computer and don't get to read or post. I guess, we'll have to keep pushing during those times so when we return we can get back online and tell everyone how we are doing, and better yet to see how every one else is doing. Isn't it funny...I used to run to my computer in the morning terrified about what emails I sent out with a loaded brain. Now I run to the computer in the morning to see how all our classmates did! I love seeing people on line on this website from 2004, 2007, etc. That will be us, helping others cope as we are.
Have a wonderful day every one. I have to take two dogs to the vet.
Be well!
Member
Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: CO.
Posts: 141
4)
Sorry to keep being so brief, just wanted to check in with everyone before I head out for another hot day of hard work. Still hanging with the Junesters! I hope you all have a good day and will try to check in and respond to some other people's postings later today!
PN
Sorry to keep being so brief, just wanted to check in with everyone before I head out for another hot day of hard work. Still hanging with the Junesters! I hope you all have a good day and will try to check in and respond to some other people's postings later today!
PN
Member
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: Most Isolated City in the World
Posts: 108
I too have not told my husband Squishy and Buelah. He works away from home for 2 weeks at a time. I skype him most days but I really want to tell him to his face. I have never tried to give up drinking before and only confronted the fact that I had a problem 5 days ago. He is such a good man and I know this sounds ridiculous but in some perverse way I think (alchy thinking) that I will let him down by telling him.
This person who is an alcoholic (me) is not the person that I want him to be married to an is not the person I want to be or the person I thought I was.
Its a hell of a shock when you realise you dont even know who you are.
A person at my meeting today told me that he probably would be happy to hear that Ive stopped drinking and admitted I am an alcoholic. I hope so.
This person who is an alcoholic (me) is not the person that I want him to be married to an is not the person I want to be or the person I thought I was.
Its a hell of a shock when you realise you dont even know who you are.
A person at my meeting today told me that he probably would be happy to hear that Ive stopped drinking and admitted I am an alcoholic. I hope so.
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