Class Of May 2011 Part 2
MINEr
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: Bay Area, Ca
Posts: 505
Lushly- It was an off-hand suggestion of mine, but I think it will give us a touch of strength and uniqueness, not to mention making us look cool, so, three 'ayes' and we can change the name to the "May it Never End, 2011" club...
Beendown- I work in a high end restaurant. It gets tough at times. The booze is everywhere. I need to get used to having it around. My brother is a chef too, and has been sober 8 years, so I know it is possible, but man, does it suck sometimes.
Hope everyone else is working hard at their sobriety and not settling into cruise control.
Day 47- camedown
Beendown- I work in a high end restaurant. It gets tough at times. The booze is everywhere. I need to get used to having it around. My brother is a chef too, and has been sober 8 years, so I know it is possible, but man, does it suck sometimes.
Hope everyone else is working hard at their sobriety and not settling into cruise control.
Day 47- camedown
Member
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: near London, UK
Posts: 582
Aye from me 
Day 39 - had a good meeting tonight - step 8 - I couldnt think of anything to say other than thanks for the advice and peoples shares on how they dealt with it or their views on it. It always amazes me how everyone seems to have something different to say that I can often relate to. I hope I can do that too soon and be useful to others who are newer to it than me.
Still having little or no cravings as such just a feeling of not knowing what to do with myself when I would usually be drinking. I can "do" things and keep busy but its like something is missing. I need to connect with my higher power and am sort of hitting a brick wall. I am trying but there are always doubts at the back of my mind. My sponsor says its probably cos of the "set aside" prayer which I am saying as part of my step work every morning and every evening and before I do any of the work. It gave her flashbacks to childhood abuse and stuff when she did it. I must try harder not to overanalyse.
My black cloud that has been around since Friday I think seems to be going away and ive been generally happy since yesterday so I am grateful for that.
Goodnight Mayitneverenders (thoughts of Eastenders and the drums at the end of each show are in my head now but Im not sure anyone else will know what im on about so I wont elaborate haha).
Day 39 - had a good meeting tonight - step 8 - I couldnt think of anything to say other than thanks for the advice and peoples shares on how they dealt with it or their views on it. It always amazes me how everyone seems to have something different to say that I can often relate to. I hope I can do that too soon and be useful to others who are newer to it than me.
Still having little or no cravings as such just a feeling of not knowing what to do with myself when I would usually be drinking. I can "do" things and keep busy but its like something is missing. I need to connect with my higher power and am sort of hitting a brick wall. I am trying but there are always doubts at the back of my mind. My sponsor says its probably cos of the "set aside" prayer which I am saying as part of my step work every morning and every evening and before I do any of the work. It gave her flashbacks to childhood abuse and stuff when she did it. I must try harder not to overanalyse.
My black cloud that has been around since Friday I think seems to be going away and ive been generally happy since yesterday so I am grateful for that.
Goodnight Mayitneverenders (thoughts of Eastenders and the drums at the end of each show are in my head now but Im not sure anyone else will know what im on about so I wont elaborate haha).
Administrator
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,355
I know the thread titles are pretty unimaginative but there's a reason...we need to keep the thread title pretty specific so that people can find it easily, guys....
but if you want to refer to yourselves as the 'May It Never End Club 11' within the thread, thats up to you guys
D
but if you want to refer to yourselves as the 'May It Never End Club 11' within the thread, thats up to you guys
D
Member
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: near London, UK
Posts: 582
I agree with Dee - it is important that people can find us - those new to the site who started in May or some who may have left and want to come back and find us.
Thank you Dee for pointing this out.
Thank you Dee for pointing this out.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Mt
Posts: 298
I like the May it never end 11. I am so slow that it took me a minute to figure out the May part. Sa'la vee to many brain cells I think that it is a far out way to unite in our recovery. I am 74 days today. I am going to chair a meeting later this month at our Alano Club to start my service work. I am here in a larger city and will return to my small town at the end of the summer. The meetings there are very small and I will say different. Well family calls and I need to go. Thanks for being here. Stay Sober gang. (())s the lush.
I think that it is a far out way to unite in our recovery. I am 74 days today. I am going to chair a meeting later this month at our Alano Club to start my service work. I am here in a larger city and will return to my small town at the end of the summer. The meetings there are very small and I will say different. Well family calls and I need to go. Thanks for being here. Stay Sober gang. (())s the lush.
Member
Join Date: May 2011
Posts: 224
Good checking in with all you Silly Geese.
I like the May It Never End 11.
I don't have much going on. I'm contemplating if I need to spend some time alone, and if that would be worth turning lives upside down for, and if this though process isn't just reactionary. Why can't I just take good enough as good enough. Am I after some comedic movie ending. Strange that these thoughts don't feel like questions.
Time will tell. I'm waiting for some celestial sign like any annoying cinematic heroine would. I just hope this sign doesn't come in 10 years with me waking up and realizing that waiting is just a way of doing nothing.
Sorry to be so bleak.
CatFry
I like the May It Never End 11.
I don't have much going on. I'm contemplating if I need to spend some time alone, and if that would be worth turning lives upside down for, and if this though process isn't just reactionary. Why can't I just take good enough as good enough. Am I after some comedic movie ending. Strange that these thoughts don't feel like questions.
Time will tell. I'm waiting for some celestial sign like any annoying cinematic heroine would. I just hope this sign doesn't come in 10 years with me waking up and realizing that waiting is just a way of doing nothing.
Sorry to be so bleak.
CatFry
Member
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Mt
Posts: 298
I understand Catfry. I feel like my life would be better if I could change my location and continue my therapy and meeting where I first got sober, but I have to return to my small town and all the same stuff and no one else in my family in recovery. I am sober , everything is fixed. The thought being that going to work, grocery shopping, cooking and watching my grandson should be enough. Oh throw in an AA meeting just to make sure that I am still sober. I realize that I have so much mind work to do once the physical craving is gone, but no one else but me see any imporatance in that. I know that it only matters that I do what I have to do, that I have no control over people, places or things. Just venting some fear and frustaration. SR is a safe place to do that.
Member
Join Date: May 2011
Location: New York, NY
Posts: 267
I almost slipped today. I had to fire an employee of mine whos a very good friend. Mostly because he has a coke addiction that affects his work. The pain I felt was almost too much to handle. I just wanted to escape. I'm not sure what sense it made to get drunk and high because of having to fire someone for a drug addiction. But I guess that's the silliness of my addiction.
Anyway, I stopped myself right before picking up. Not because I was worried about losing my health, son, wife, job, family, or anything. But because I have a half-marathon in two weeks and I really want to see if I can make my time goal of an hour and a half. If I ruined by sobriety I wouldn't be able to do my final training runs.
How stupid is that?
Anyway, I stopped myself right before picking up. Not because I was worried about losing my health, son, wife, job, family, or anything. But because I have a half-marathon in two weeks and I really want to see if I can make my time goal of an hour and a half. If I ruined by sobriety I wouldn't be able to do my final training runs.
How stupid is that?
Member
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Mountains of W.N.C.
Posts: 198
Made the trip home yesterday afternoon rather than this morning to avoid the traffic & glad I did.
However, returning alone to a dark apartment & empty bed has me feeling down this morning. Guess loneliness has officially set in & damn if it isn't getting the best of me at the moment. Trying to think of things to do that might get my mind off of it, but nothing sounds appealing. The bed looks nice, but what is laying around all day going to accomplish?
Probably not helping matters that it's a cool, damp & grey day here in the mountains.
However, returning alone to a dark apartment & empty bed has me feeling down this morning. Guess loneliness has officially set in & damn if it isn't getting the best of me at the moment. Trying to think of things to do that might get my mind off of it, but nothing sounds appealing. The bed looks nice, but what is laying around all day going to accomplish?
Probably not helping matters that it's a cool, damp & grey day here in the mountains.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Mt
Posts: 298
Hey Concor, Sorry you are lonesome. It is one of the HALT words. So don't be lonely. It is not safe. I have colored meditation mandellas. You can print them off free online. If you have some paint or colored pencils it is theriputic and passed the time on a gray day. I am with you in thought my friend you are not alone.
Member
Join Date: May 2011
Location: New York, NY
Posts: 267
Thanks guys for your kind words. The demons are circling me tonight something fierce. I just looked at the calendar and realized my one slip was 30 days ago. Maybe that means my dumb-a** is programmed to want to relapse as soon as I have 30 clean days.
I'll be okay though. My half-marathon is my higher power the next two weeks. (I'm half-kidding here so forgive the AA blasphemy).
Concor, sorry you're feeling lonely. May I suggest watching a funny movie? I know for me it's been helpful to pop in a Will Farell flick. Or maybe a nice Bill Murray classic like Stripes or Groundhog Day. Just a suggestion. We're here for you bro!
I'll be okay though. My half-marathon is my higher power the next two weeks. (I'm half-kidding here so forgive the AA blasphemy).
Concor, sorry you're feeling lonely. May I suggest watching a funny movie? I know for me it's been helpful to pop in a Will Farell flick. Or maybe a nice Bill Murray classic like Stripes or Groundhog Day. Just a suggestion. We're here for you bro!
Member
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Mt
Posts: 298
Hey Beendown I don't believe that calling your 1/2 marathon your higher power is an AA blasphmey. Anything that is outside yourself that helps keep you sober . Don't hang out in your head too much, when you are craving it not a good place to be.
Member
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Mountains of W.N.C.
Posts: 198
Thanks for the words of encouragement!
Although I did pile up in bed for a bit, I finally got up & soon found myself busy.
Once I did, the rest of the day slipped away quickly leaving me feeling much better about the issue.
Did pick up a new dvd player today so watching a movie is now an option.
Pleased to say, today is the 9 week mark for me. :-)
Although I did pile up in bed for a bit, I finally got up & soon found myself busy.
Once I did, the rest of the day slipped away quickly leaving me feeling much better about the issue.
Did pick up a new dvd player today so watching a movie is now an option.
Pleased to say, today is the 9 week mark for me. :-)
MINEr
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: Bay Area, Ca
Posts: 505
I went to a great edeucational seminar on spirituality today that really broke down the "higher power" aspect of the twelve steps. They showed how spirituality is distinctly different from religion, in that religion is a tool to bind and unite an individual and community to God, whereas spirituality is an essence binding the inner parts of our soul and psyche. It went on, through a breakdown of the twelve steps, to show how the process starts at the innermost part of our being to heal ourselves, changing despair to hope, anger to acceptance, and sorrow to joy. I felt truly renewed and more than eager to continue with the step work.
I hope you all finish the weekend in style, and remember, May It Never End.
Day 49- camedown
I hope you all finish the weekend in style, and remember, May It Never End.
Day 49- camedown
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