Six Months & Under Club Part 3
Member
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: West Coast, Australia
Posts: 319
Hi Everyone!
Well, dropping in to see how everyone is going. I'm so busy at the moment (playing catchup still) so this will have to be brief!
I got back to my old habit of sitting down at my office desk so today, I've pushed the chair to one side and am back standing. My legs are screaming at me to exercise! Hmm, perhaps I'm a runner after all.....
Kevin, sounds like you are working it out and taking steps to branch out. Well done.
Well, I hope everyone has a great day today. Be positive and strong - have a great one!
Rosco.
Life=Fun; Alcohol=Devastation.
Well, dropping in to see how everyone is going. I'm so busy at the moment (playing catchup still) so this will have to be brief!
I got back to my old habit of sitting down at my office desk so today, I've pushed the chair to one side and am back standing. My legs are screaming at me to exercise! Hmm, perhaps I'm a runner after all.....
Kevin, sounds like you are working it out and taking steps to branch out. Well done.
Well, I hope everyone has a great day today. Be positive and strong - have a great one!
Rosco.
Life=Fun; Alcohol=Devastation.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: United Kingdom
Posts: 1,691
I feeling a little sorry for myself right now. I feel like I am much more in control of myself but of course i am 32 and im sad that it has taken so long
Im not sure if my mother[and] father are both codependent types since this is my most highest one now arharha. So been to see my grandfather today, the juxtopose of my grandfather and my 14month nephew was a big contrast.
MY moods can switch rapidly this last month or so so what im feeling now may have moved on [up or down] by the time you are reading this. Not feeling like using just sad really, sad that my granfathers condition has declined sad for my mother who is now tending vigil and sad that my father and i still have respect issues
Still improvements about, finding that setting boundaries and learning to say no really does work, that there could be a way to freedom light for me, that i may end up that cool sober guy who turned it around. But also sad for the past and where i have been
Im not sure if my mother[and] father are both codependent types since this is my most highest one now arharha. So been to see my grandfather today, the juxtopose of my grandfather and my 14month nephew was a big contrast.
MY moods can switch rapidly this last month or so so what im feeling now may have moved on [up or down] by the time you are reading this. Not feeling like using just sad really, sad that my granfathers condition has declined sad for my mother who is now tending vigil and sad that my father and i still have respect issues
Still improvements about, finding that setting boundaries and learning to say no really does work, that there could be a way to freedom light for me, that i may end up that cool sober guy who turned it around. But also sad for the past and where i have been
Member
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: UK
Posts: 263
Hi everyone,
Sounds like we're all going through a busy time at the moment, but hopefully staying focused.
Kevin, I believe you can be the guy that turns it all around. Remember that it takes time to change. We're all a "work in progress". I hope one day your little Nephew will see that it is possible for people to change their lives, because he will see the changes you will have made.
Take care everyone,
Sounds like we're all going through a busy time at the moment, but hopefully staying focused.
Kevin, I believe you can be the guy that turns it all around. Remember that it takes time to change. We're all a "work in progress". I hope one day your little Nephew will see that it is possible for people to change their lives, because he will see the changes you will have made.
Take care everyone,
Administrator
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,439
I was 39/40 when I cleaned up Kevin.
I could cry over those lost years, but instead I live for today - I've done more in the last 4 years than I did in the 20 years before that - and that's important thing to me.
IALF is right tho - change is a process - it takes time and effort before we see the results, the process is underway already Kevin.
D
I could cry over those lost years, but instead I live for today - I've done more in the last 4 years than I did in the 20 years before that - and that's important thing to me.
IALF is right tho - change is a process - it takes time and effort before we see the results, the process is underway already Kevin.
D
Member
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: West Coast, Australia
Posts: 319
Hi Everyone!
Yes, it's so easy to get stuck in the past or the future, and I guess 95% of people walking this planet have their minds mostly past or future as well. They reckon that the 20th century will be seen as the century diseased with overthinking! Hmm, the 21st century might be added to that as well.
I must admit that I tend to go back and do the "what if I had done this or that....". The biggest issue for me is would it have made a difference with my kids? But, the past is past and I can work hard on the "right now", this very instant. And that's all that matters.
At work, the motto is a strong "Life wasn't meant to be taken seriously". Yes, you have responsibilities but you are not paid to get stressed out. So, living in the moment and not taking it too seriously is the way to go for me.
I find that I have to "exercise" my mind each day to quieten down my incessant thinking - all sorts of junk floats in and out of my thinking, so quiet mediation or simply feel the moment without thinking is good exercise. If I don't do this, I can be run ragged.
Kevin, keep working it out and I hope you can be happy with your progress.
IamLivingFree - you asked a question about the lemon drink that I make - in the next couple of days, I post some photos of the soda stream that I've bought and now use - it's very popular! Soda, Bickford's lime or lemon, slices of lime and ice!
Rosco.
Life=Fun; Alcohol=Devastation.
Yes, it's so easy to get stuck in the past or the future, and I guess 95% of people walking this planet have their minds mostly past or future as well. They reckon that the 20th century will be seen as the century diseased with overthinking! Hmm, the 21st century might be added to that as well.
I must admit that I tend to go back and do the "what if I had done this or that....". The biggest issue for me is would it have made a difference with my kids? But, the past is past and I can work hard on the "right now", this very instant. And that's all that matters.
At work, the motto is a strong "Life wasn't meant to be taken seriously". Yes, you have responsibilities but you are not paid to get stressed out. So, living in the moment and not taking it too seriously is the way to go for me.
I find that I have to "exercise" my mind each day to quieten down my incessant thinking - all sorts of junk floats in and out of my thinking, so quiet mediation or simply feel the moment without thinking is good exercise. If I don't do this, I can be run ragged.
Kevin, keep working it out and I hope you can be happy with your progress.
IamLivingFree - you asked a question about the lemon drink that I make - in the next couple of days, I post some photos of the soda stream that I've bought and now use - it's very popular! Soda, Bickford's lime or lemon, slices of lime and ice!
Rosco.
Life=Fun; Alcohol=Devastation.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: United Kingdom
Posts: 1,691
Well my grandfather has passed.
Strange i had to look up condolences. So many times ive heard it but never understood that (according to what i have read online-and support me here please if you are able and well to do so) it means offering active conscious support to the person well thats what some pages I am reading are saying about it. I spoke to another person who lost someone recently and they talked of condolences so i looked it up on t'interweb.
I have had so much support from the people here.
It only happened this morning less than 4 hours ago. I have spoken to my mother she is being a good example i think at the moment. I will be calling later on today and will at that time offer condolences to my parents. I got a phonecall at 7am this morning I took the message of his passing and said little more.
We all got to visit him [my grandfather] yesterday and my mother and father were with him as he passed. My sister, her son, my mother father and I were there yesterday plus his step daughter whom he adopted.
Strange i had to look up condolences. So many times ive heard it but never understood that (according to what i have read online-and support me here please if you are able and well to do so) it means offering active conscious support to the person well thats what some pages I am reading are saying about it. I spoke to another person who lost someone recently and they talked of condolences so i looked it up on t'interweb.
I have had so much support from the people here.
It only happened this morning less than 4 hours ago. I have spoken to my mother she is being a good example i think at the moment. I will be calling later on today and will at that time offer condolences to my parents. I got a phonecall at 7am this morning I took the message of his passing and said little more.
We all got to visit him [my grandfather] yesterday and my mother and father were with him as he passed. My sister, her son, my mother father and I were there yesterday plus his step daughter whom he adopted.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: United Kingdom
Posts: 1,691
Day 96 Im bluesy. My father has upset me as he has done many times. There is real improvement however. I seem to have educated myself rather well on detachment and have twice now detached from him at what appears to be optimal time [when i have said and listened to all i can without getting mad].
So yeagh, feeling blue that my dad is full of untoward trouble to me and has been for what seems like forever [or at least 20 years now]. I am grateful for some educational study material that is educating me about the codependency thing however and now i am teaching myself It seems likely that by not allowing myself to become dependent on and accepting of bad behavior [even from my own father] there is a good chance they will be forced to alter their behavior since it no longer washes
So yeagh, feeling blue that my dad is full of untoward trouble to me and has been for what seems like forever [or at least 20 years now]. I am grateful for some educational study material that is educating me about the codependency thing however and now i am teaching myself It seems likely that by not allowing myself to become dependent on and accepting of bad behavior [even from my own father] there is a good chance they will be forced to alter their behavior since it no longer washes
Member
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: West Coast, Australia
Posts: 319
Hi Everyone!
Well, off to have a nice breakfast at a local cafe today. The coffee's there isn't too bad either. On the topic of coffee, is anyone else getting really fussy with their coffee? I'm loving the little but important things, ie, getting close to nature (and actually getting into nature, ie, going for a swim in the ocean) but I might have 3 or 4 cups of coffee a day and I want each one to count! The other day, we went to a local fair and one of the local clubs were serving hotdogs and coffee. I looked at the huge tin of instant coffee, then looked around to see if the capaccino van was around but no. So I went with the instant. Wrong move!
Kevin, the other day, there was cause for me to get stressed about a family matter. It's passed now but it was reasonably serious at the time. I'm not sure I'm that good at handling stress however, I went back to what I did when I first gave up the booze - went for walks, went to the beach, looked at the waves and sand etc and it helped a lot. I guess you'd call it a connection with the present and the beauty of the world. Very calming and grounding.
Well, off to my breakfast now - have a great day everyone!
Rosco.
Life=Fun; Alcohol=Devastation.
Well, off to have a nice breakfast at a local cafe today. The coffee's there isn't too bad either. On the topic of coffee, is anyone else getting really fussy with their coffee? I'm loving the little but important things, ie, getting close to nature (and actually getting into nature, ie, going for a swim in the ocean) but I might have 3 or 4 cups of coffee a day and I want each one to count! The other day, we went to a local fair and one of the local clubs were serving hotdogs and coffee. I looked at the huge tin of instant coffee, then looked around to see if the capaccino van was around but no. So I went with the instant. Wrong move!
Kevin, the other day, there was cause for me to get stressed about a family matter. It's passed now but it was reasonably serious at the time. I'm not sure I'm that good at handling stress however, I went back to what I did when I first gave up the booze - went for walks, went to the beach, looked at the waves and sand etc and it helped a lot. I guess you'd call it a connection with the present and the beauty of the world. Very calming and grounding.
Well, off to my breakfast now - have a great day everyone!
Rosco.
Life=Fun; Alcohol=Devastation.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: United Kingdom
Posts: 1,691
Well signing in. Im grateful to many people here. My mother, my grandfather, grateful is right. Grateful to all those ahead of me on what i seem to be identifying as 'freedom road'
Grateful yes, i do hope that now im emerging from the hell of codependency i can pass on the wisdom and follow in the footsteps of great men - and women
Grateful yes, i do hope that now im emerging from the hell of codependency i can pass on the wisdom and follow in the footsteps of great men - and women
Member
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: United Kingdom
Posts: 1,691
My codie stuff is moving forward. Still attempting to dis-entangle myself from the guy that lives next door emotionally-heh and im str8! Well i was assertive of my own needs today, I told him that i needed to put the hatred behind us. Never done anything like that before , me, telling someone else what i need wow. I also told him that i wanted him to understand i identify as codependent personality type.
We shook hands in the end. Its not perfect im not happy over him but its a step[a big one] towards more comfort next door with my neighbours.
Emotionally and psychologically drained.
Kevin
We shook hands in the end. Its not perfect im not happy over him but its a step[a big one] towards more comfort next door with my neighbours.
Emotionally and psychologically drained.
Kevin
Member
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: West Coast, Australia
Posts: 319
Hello everyone!
Well, it's Monday morning here - it took me a lot of effort to get up this morning early to exercise (not sure if I need to start learning about discipline ??!). I think the trick is to not think about it - the alarm goes off and then just get out of bed! Went for a 30 minute run then on the bike for 20mins. Nothing too strenuous.
We had a nephew's birthday's celebration last night and was offered "top shelf" red wine. I said, no, I've got my soda. But I was wondering that if people didn't ask why I don't drink, I should now be explaining clearly that I don't drink anymore. Ie, be proactive. Just a small thought. If I did that, it would be done and dusted.
Kevin, seems like you make big progress yesterday with you neighbour. Well done.
Everyone, have a great day!
Rosco.
Life=Fun; Alcohol=Devastation.
Well, it's Monday morning here - it took me a lot of effort to get up this morning early to exercise (not sure if I need to start learning about discipline ??!). I think the trick is to not think about it - the alarm goes off and then just get out of bed! Went for a 30 minute run then on the bike for 20mins. Nothing too strenuous.
We had a nephew's birthday's celebration last night and was offered "top shelf" red wine. I said, no, I've got my soda. But I was wondering that if people didn't ask why I don't drink, I should now be explaining clearly that I don't drink anymore. Ie, be proactive. Just a small thought. If I did that, it would be done and dusted.
Kevin, seems like you make big progress yesterday with you neighbour. Well done.
Everyone, have a great day!
Rosco.
Life=Fun; Alcohol=Devastation.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Ohio, USA
Posts: 316
Originally Posted by YouAreNumberOne 
We had a nephew's birthday's celebration last night and was offered "top shelf" red wine. I said, no, I've got my soda. But I was wondering that if people didn't ask why I don't drink, I should now be explaining clearly that I don't drink anymore. Ie, be proactive. Just a small thought. If I did that, it would be done and dusted.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: West Coast, Australia
Posts: 319
Hi Everyone!
Good tip - WTS, thanks. I'll have to practice getting the words out. They don't seem to come out easily.
Kevin, I know Dee has already mentioned this but is there a possibility of you moving away and getting away from the grief of living next door to the neighbour?
Well, another day sober for me today!
Rosco.
Life=Fun; Alcohol=Devastation.
Good tip - WTS, thanks. I'll have to practice getting the words out. They don't seem to come out easily.
Kevin, I know Dee has already mentioned this but is there a possibility of you moving away and getting away from the grief of living next door to the neighbour?
Well, another day sober for me today!
Rosco.
Life=Fun; Alcohol=Devastation.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: United Kingdom
Posts: 1,691
YouAreNumberOne hehe thanks. Hope you are doing well D idk thankyou again alot hope you are having a good time in oz. WatchtheSky I like your avatar. Swansong you have helped me along [the way] so. IamLivingFree come on sobers !
Member
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: United Kingdom
Posts: 1,691
Well its nearly midnight. Sitting here listening to the radio again to drown out the nonsense. Blinking drunks and there foolish arguments. Jibber jabber it just goes on and on. It cant be helped i suppose. Learning the art of acceptance.
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