least

I have to agree with this. I failed miserably when I was just 'fighting the urge'. But once I fully accepted my addiction it was easier to not drink cause I knew in my heart that it was no longer an option.

invisigoth

Forgive me but this is the part I don't quite get, acceptance, what exactly do you mean by this? I do accept the fact that I am an alcoholic and can't control my drinking. Now what else is there for me to do other than use the power of my will and sheer determination to stop? That's how I stopped smoking cigarettes, one day I threw my cigarette down and said that's it I'm done and that was it. I don't know perhaps it's just my naivete' but in my mind this shouldn't be all that different for the most part. But none the less I very much appreciate everyones advice. I think a big part of my problem is that I still really enjoyed drinking.

least

Let's see if I can explain it better. By 'accepting' that I'm alcoholic it's eliminating the option of ever drinking again, ever. When I was fighting it I still felt I had a measure of 'control' and was really only trying to control my drinking, not stop it altogether. By accepting it, I accept that I can no longer drink, never ever again.

An analogy would be if I were in the ring with Ali and he'd whup my butt every time. But I'd keep on going back for more, and would get whupped again. Over and over until I accepted that I could never beat him and just quit fighting him. Does that make any sense?

THat's the best way I can explain it - to just stop fighting it and give in and accept that it's going to beat my @ss every time, so best to not even start the fight. To surrender, to capitulate, to the fact that alcohol is bigger and badder than I am and the only way to win is to not fight anymore.

invisigoth

It's day 23 and it's full steam ahead.

least

Way to go!! I've been wondering how you were. Glad you checked in.

Iamlivingfree

Hi everyone,

Just popped by to give my "two pennies worth".

Invis, thanks for the limerick, it made me laugh!

I also think a shift from using pure will-power to having an attidude of acceptance is important. I also found the distinction difficult to understand, because it is a bit vague.

I think will-power takes a lot of mental energy, and eventually exhausts our resolve to improve our life. The focus is on "getting through this dreadful situation", this keeps us from actually moving psychologically beyond the "dreadful" situation, and then feeling in need of a big reward for trying so hard.

Acceptance on the other hand, is a realisation that our perception of this situation is just transitory, and focuses much more on the positive possibilities for the future. This can then help us move past the "I don't want to be doing this!" phase, and the healthy, free, future becomes it's own reward.

I hope this makes some sort of sense. I can think of examples where these differences of attitude/response has an effect in many areas of life, and i'm happy to go on if it would help (i've just deleted one example, because it started to become a novel!).

Anyway, have a great day all,

Eagles Fan

16 days sober and I'm feeling great today. It's awesome to be so full of energy in the morning.

leo21

Way to go EF - congrats on 'graduating' to this posting area!

Indecisive

18 days. It keeps getting better each day. I am loving waking up and not feeling sick. Loving that the anxiety and feelings of depression are lifting. Sure beats the alternative.

Auggie

Good Morning Everyone!!!

Today is day 15 for me. There have been a lot of ups and downs but the ups are winning. The downs seem less severe and occur less often. I am looking at a real lifestyle change. Not just not drinking but I've started exercising and eating better. I've been spending a lot of time organizing my life. I'm also working out exactly what it is I want my life to be like. I do have to be mindful of not putting too much pressure on myself to have everything worked out NOW. Just trying to take things one day at a time and do the best I can each day.

Enough of my ramblings...Hope everyone has a beautiful and sober day!!!

Eagles Fan

Hugger, your post easily could have been mine. I've been doing the exact same things. 17 days and I feel great. I will not drink today.

Auggie

Good Morning All!!!

I'd like to start with, I like healthy foods. I love fresh fruits and vegetables and fish. I don't care for a lot of processed foods or sweets and I buy organic as much as possible. That being said, I have heard many people have sweet cravings when they quit. Not me...until yesterday.

Not unlike Linda Blair in the movie, The Exorcist, I spoke the following words to my boyfriend. "I want CAKE...or PIE...maybe CAKE and PIE!" My boyfriend loves sweets and hopped right on board. We were leaving the store with 2 cakes and a chocolate cream pie when we spotted the girl scouts sitting at a table full of cookies.

I picked up a box of Thin Mints and began reading the ingredients. My boyfriend whispered under his breath, "Don't do it!". So, I resisted the urge to ask if they were made with real girl scouts. And we went home with 4 boxes of cookies as well.

I don't imagine I'll be making a habit of this but it was a fun indulgence. I have a massage scheduled for after work today. This is a very relaxing way to start the weekend. I highly recommend it. I still need to work out some sort of weekend plan. I've enjoyed 2 sober weekends so far. I'm looking forward to seeing what this one has to offer.

Happy Sober Friday!!!

:ghug3

Auggie

Good Morning!!!!

Just a quick check in. Kept myself busy cleaning the house yesterday. I'm planning more of the same today. Also, planning some healthy meals for the week and checking out a farmers market that I haven't been to yet.

Thanks to the money I've saved on booze, I'll be getting my motorcycle insured and registered this week!!! Riding is the most de-stressing activity I know of. If weather permits, next Sunday I'll have my sober backside on the road!!!

Have a beautiful Sunday!

least

I'm assuming you ride a Harley... My dog-rescue-lady-friend rides a beautiful turquoise blue Harley.

Enjoy your ride.

Auggie

I hope this Monday morning finds everyone well and in good spirits!

I had a very peaceful and productive weekend. Very little desire to drink. Found out my hours have been cut...again. I love my job but this happens every couple of months. I could go back to full time tomorrow or in 2 weeks. There is no way to know. So, the motorcycle is not being made legal this week and no massage on Friday. However, the new and improved sober me can really focus on developing a secondary source of income. This is something the drunk me put some effort into but never followed through with.

Have a beautiful Monday!

shegirl

Hi everyone! Working on day 18 here. I'm tired but its Monday morning. hope everyone has a good day!!

Auggie

Good morning all - Just a quick check in before starting my very short work day. I'm drinking a lot more coffee than I used to when I was drinking. Is it common to substitute caffeine for alcohol? I'm going to start cutting back on it today. Oddly enough, I've been sleeping really well for the past few nights.

Eagles Fan

I drink a ton more coffee too since I've stopped drinking. I'm going to try to cut back after 30 days of sobriety.

Auggie

Just a quick check in. Starting day 22. Life is good. I have many new possibilities opening up right now that never would have been possible while I was drinking. It just keeps getting better and better.

Happy Thursday!

Auggie

Oh, I forgot to mention, I have a new part time job that I can work around my existing schedule.