Class of April 2010 - Part 4
Guest
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: New York
Posts: 393
Hello family, thanks for sharing the experiences with family and support (online and off). I've only skimmed through the past week's convo, I'll have to get into to it later this evening.
Just wanted to post to let you know im still around, doing pretty good this week.
be back tonight, God willing.
Just wanted to post to let you know im still around, doing pretty good this week.
be back tonight, God willing.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Lowcountry
Posts: 2,762
Cleansing,
Good to hear from ya too !
Tues will be 4 weeks since this operation;
.... putting in this titanium total knee replacement, and I have to say, if ever there was a trigger to drink these past weeks, it would be with the ongoing pain assc. with this thing !?!
Besides my occasional old standard "woe is me, I've got an effed-up knee, ...and it's killin' me right now"...as an excuse to get wasted, [temporary pain-killer] The other litany of mental crap from the past I would dredge up just further "justified" pouring some more "medicine" ....endlessly.
Things are soooo, so different today though. Not feeling sorry for myself, but really feel so grateful and "blessed' in recovery. This is (obviously) going to take a firm commitement to get my getaway sticks anywhere close to "normal"
Without the fog of liquor clouding the way, ...it's just more trudging forward !
Having to get used to (and acccepting)the slow progress, since patience has never, ever, really been part of my overall psche.
Just checkin' in on this beautiful clear full moonlit night.
Good to hear from ya too !
Tues will be 4 weeks since this operation;
.... putting in this titanium total knee replacement, and I have to say, if ever there was a trigger to drink these past weeks, it would be with the ongoing pain assc. with this thing !?!
Besides my occasional old standard "woe is me, I've got an effed-up knee, ...and it's killin' me right now"...as an excuse to get wasted, [temporary pain-killer] The other litany of mental crap from the past I would dredge up just further "justified" pouring some more "medicine" ....endlessly.
Things are soooo, so different today though. Not feeling sorry for myself, but really feel so grateful and "blessed' in recovery. This is (obviously) going to take a firm commitement to get my getaway sticks anywhere close to "normal"
Without the fog of liquor clouding the way, ...it's just more trudging forward !
Having to get used to (and acccepting)the slow progress, since patience has never, ever, really been part of my overall psche.
Just checkin' in on this beautiful clear full moonlit night.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Germany
Posts: 2,058
Cleansing so glad to see the update!!
AG and TS....I definitely know I am thrilled to be sober this season too as all of my drinking years involved the annual drunken Christmas.....bluh.
I was just reflecting (God knows why in the world this memory popped into my head) that I will share with all of you prob. when I have a little more time to put my thoughts together so it makes sense instead of another ramble....lol.
I am loving the good vibes from all of you and glad to have you all my hard working recovering pals!!! You really allow me a place where I can share. Not that I ever have a good feeling from a past drinking memory, etc. but it is nice to actually put it out there with others who can relate to what life was like and how that doesn't define us. What defines us is who we are now and how we saddled up and pulled ourselves out of that pit.
Now on a weather note. Germany weather is generally moderate. Winters aren't too cold or snowy and summers aren't boiling hot or humid - hence German houses do not have a/c or even screens! The joke are the summer flies. Yeah they invade your home seriously. Recently though......OMG the Snow Gods have unleashed their fury on us.
We have had snow every single day since last week. Now where I live......the autobahn is priority and then main drags but Germany is just a huge ole pile of side roads that twist/turn, etc. Many hills and well you could be in the middle of nowhere and then suddenly be in a tiny village. Picturesque indeed.....driving wise? Freaking horrendous.
So coming from the Northeast...I am used to Nor'easters, etc. but we had like 5 inches 1 night, 3 inches the next, then another 1 inch the next day. Crazy! Warmed up yesterday a bit so it all melted in hours. Now its like a snow globe again. Its just wild.
Ok that was my weather update from Germany for all of you....hehe.
AG and TS....I definitely know I am thrilled to be sober this season too as all of my drinking years involved the annual drunken Christmas.....bluh.
I was just reflecting (God knows why in the world this memory popped into my head) that I will share with all of you prob. when I have a little more time to put my thoughts together so it makes sense instead of another ramble....lol.
I am loving the good vibes from all of you and glad to have you all my hard working recovering pals!!! You really allow me a place where I can share. Not that I ever have a good feeling from a past drinking memory, etc. but it is nice to actually put it out there with others who can relate to what life was like and how that doesn't define us. What defines us is who we are now and how we saddled up and pulled ourselves out of that pit.
Now on a weather note. Germany weather is generally moderate. Winters aren't too cold or snowy and summers aren't boiling hot or humid - hence German houses do not have a/c or even screens! The joke are the summer flies. Yeah they invade your home seriously. Recently though......OMG the Snow Gods have unleashed their fury on us.
We have had snow every single day since last week. Now where I live......the autobahn is priority and then main drags but Germany is just a huge ole pile of side roads that twist/turn, etc. Many hills and well you could be in the middle of nowhere and then suddenly be in a tiny village. Picturesque indeed.....driving wise? Freaking horrendous.
So coming from the Northeast...I am used to Nor'easters, etc. but we had like 5 inches 1 night, 3 inches the next, then another 1 inch the next day. Crazy! Warmed up yesterday a bit so it all melted in hours. Now its like a snow globe again. Its just wild.
Ok that was my weather update from Germany for all of you....hehe.
April 18, 2010
Join Date: Apr 2010
Posts: 1,117
Hey guys! So great to read your posts. Glad you're back Kim! I hope to have time to respond more to all soon. Right now just checking in. Turns out there is no wireless where I'm staying for now so just my phone. 
agh! Hopefully can remedy this soon. Been having a bumpy few days, but in the interest of focusing on the positive I'll tell you guys that the night I arrived home I honestly went to bed thinking sobriety is the greatest gift I could ever have. I walked into the house that eve and into a drunken argument. It wasn't too outrageous; it was the kind of argument that you just knew wouldn't have been barely anything ifthe parties involved hadn't been drinking, but instead they had had several glasses of wine and that edge of nasty viciousness had crept in. sober, I was able to dodge getting involved and was so happy to stay out of it.
So hopefully I'll be back on a real computer asap. I was so delighted to read this thread and see all of your news! Thanks for being here.
agh! Hopefully can remedy this soon. Been having a bumpy few days, but in the interest of focusing on the positive I'll tell you guys that the night I arrived home I honestly went to bed thinking sobriety is the greatest gift I could ever have. I walked into the house that eve and into a drunken argument. It wasn't too outrageous; it was the kind of argument that you just knew wouldn't have been barely anything ifthe parties involved hadn't been drinking, but instead they had had several glasses of wine and that edge of nasty viciousness had crept in. sober, I was able to dodge getting involved and was so happy to stay out of it. So hopefully I'll be back on a real computer asap. I was so delighted to read this thread and see all of your news! Thanks for being here.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Germany
Posts: 2,058
AG, hope you get computer access soon and so glad to see that you were able to avoid a potential situation. Couldn't agree more (even when dealing with social drinking here) that alcohol tends to bring out some of the worst in people when they drink. Not always of course and usually its laughter, etc. but I too have seen as a sober outsider past/present how many things escalate with alcohol and definitely how folks come across when they have knocked back a few. Uninhibited to say the least.
Good stuff and hoping everyone is having a good week!! Can't believe how much time is flying...lol. Ahhhhh almost January!
Good stuff and hoping everyone is having a good week!! Can't believe how much time is flying...lol. Ahhhhh almost January!
Member
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Lowcountry
Posts: 2,762
Happy Christmas to you too, Dee !?!
Glad to read your post AG, and Kim.
Funny thing how different even the subtleties of alchohol influenced behaivor hits the radar, huh !?!
Nice little "bob and weave" there, AG ! lo
.....blessed are the peacemakers
Glad to read your post AG, and Kim.
Funny thing how different even the subtleties of alchohol influenced behaivor hits the radar, huh !?!
Nice little "bob and weave" there, AG ! lo
.....blessed are the peacemakers
Member
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Germany
Posts: 2,058
Huge Merry Christmas to All!! I forgot with all our different time zones and travel plans that I might miss giving you my greeting!
Well I may be here or not....Not sure but def. no travel plans for me. The old man should be home for Christmas but I don't bank on it until I see him here...hehe. Old man = hubbs lol.
Me, just will take it easy and just started this whole doing blood sugar daily and learning how to count carbs and all the joys of trying to manage diabetes....yet make sure I don't lose any weight. Should soooo be another challenge...lol. At like 8 months I have only gained 13lbs and its all belly/baby so working closely with my newly acquired friends - nutritionist and diabetes coordinator to eat healthier. I just found out that 2 percent milk for me in the morning is a no no!!! Eeeeek...
Ok that was my cheery update. I see so many people but right now....I have 2 choices. Whack out over things or do my best and laugh along the way.
Gang....I am choosing to laugh since I haven't done much of that recently.
Huggs to all and whatever your plans are....be safe, healthy and merry!!!
Well I may be here or not....Not sure but def. no travel plans for me. The old man should be home for Christmas but I don't bank on it until I see him here...hehe. Old man = hubbs lol.
Me, just will take it easy and just started this whole doing blood sugar daily and learning how to count carbs and all the joys of trying to manage diabetes....yet make sure I don't lose any weight. Should soooo be another challenge...lol. At like 8 months I have only gained 13lbs and its all belly/baby so working closely with my newly acquired friends - nutritionist and diabetes coordinator to eat healthier. I just found out that 2 percent milk for me in the morning is a no no!!! Eeeeek...
Ok that was my cheery update. I see so many people but right now....I have 2 choices. Whack out over things or do my best and laugh along the way.
Gang....I am choosing to laugh since I haven't done much of that recently.
Huggs to all and whatever your plans are....be safe, healthy and merry!!!
Member
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Lowcountry
Posts: 2,762
Hi Gang,
Will be off-line for the next few days [probably!?]
Just wanted to wish everyone here our first clean and sober merry Christmas together.
Kim, .....are you switching over to whole milk ?
Thanks for the post, ....will try to laugh a little more, myself !?! lo
Will be off-line for the next few days [probably!?]
Just wanted to wish everyone here our first clean and sober merry Christmas together.
Kim, .....are you switching over to whole milk ?
Thanks for the post, ....will try to laugh a little more, myself !?! lo
April 18, 2010
Join Date: Apr 2010
Posts: 1,117
Hey folks!
Top, I hope you get to see that stained glass, I'm sure it will be beautiful in a decked out midnight mass . . . have a great Christmas!
Dee, hope you enjoy your few days away (we will miss you!)
Kim, I hope the snow is clearing up and hubs gets home & you are learning to manage the gestational diabetes okay. You're doing great!
Ghostly, Cleansing, good to hear from you! And to Oz and MGS and all the Aprillers . . . my happiest holiday wishes to all!
I'm writing to say Merry Christmas early since I know most of you will be offline and I want to get my greetings to all of you in advance -- I'll be checking in here during the next few days to keep my wits about me! phew! Christmas is great but certainly a change from the normal pace and feel of daily life!
Member
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Land down under
Posts: 433
I am not really into xmas, but i do appreciate that this will be my first sober xmas for 22 years!!
I hope you all have a safe and sober holiday.
Just something else i want to share with you that happened to me today. I had to get ice for my trip up to parents for xmax, and of course the most convenient spot was my old bottle shop.
Not only did I not even blink at all the alcohol, the bottle shop dude, who used to know me so well, did not remember me
How cool is that????? And of course, I didn't bother reminding him 
Life is beautiful
I hope you all have a safe and sober holiday.
Just something else i want to share with you that happened to me today. I had to get ice for my trip up to parents for xmax, and of course the most convenient spot was my old bottle shop.
Not only did I not even blink at all the alcohol, the bottle shop dude, who used to know me so well, did not remember me
How cool is that????? And of course, I didn't bother reminding him Life is beautiful
Guest
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: New York
Posts: 393
Things are pretty good outside of me.
The living situation is a blessing; I couldn't go on my own this month, but my parents have been very supportive. They seem to be doing well.
From what I was told, I'm still scheduled to start career training in mid-January.
Myself? It won't be hard to have a peaceful weekend. No huge plans for this holiday. I might go to a family dinner tonight, tho I'm not interested in anything but the food.
Otherwise, it's a free day indoors. Which is great because it's freezing out, and i am low on money for this weekend. A former bandmate of mine finally sent me some tracks ive been asking for since 2 months ago. He was reluctant to send them because I'm constantly erasing the files when i get upset. This is my last chance with him, so I have to save them in cdrs, and depositfile.
I will definitely go to a friend's house (from AA) for lunch tomorrow, then maybe stop by a NA marathon meeting for 2 hours or so. That's all I want to do, so I may just stick with that. Tomorrow is busy, today is free.
I got some very good exchanges about "resentment" this week. To be honest, i work myself up a lot holding on to past mistakes others have made, so that if they ever try to give me advice, I'd just throw those past things in their face.
If that doesn't work, i'll just go off on them. It's very poor thinking, because 95 percent of the people in my life approach me with love, and I'm full of disdain preparing for the fight that just doesn't come often enough. I work myself up a lot. They say, "if it don't apply, let it fly," and that others are allowed to have bad days as well.
Self-centeredness, fear, something new, support
hear those things a lot
just random thoughts as this point, hahah, guess my post is done.
The living situation is a blessing; I couldn't go on my own this month, but my parents have been very supportive. They seem to be doing well.
From what I was told, I'm still scheduled to start career training in mid-January.
Myself? It won't be hard to have a peaceful weekend. No huge plans for this holiday. I might go to a family dinner tonight, tho I'm not interested in anything but the food.
Otherwise, it's a free day indoors. Which is great because it's freezing out, and i am low on money for this weekend. A former bandmate of mine finally sent me some tracks ive been asking for since 2 months ago. He was reluctant to send them because I'm constantly erasing the files when i get upset. This is my last chance with him, so I have to save them in cdrs, and depositfile.
I will definitely go to a friend's house (from AA) for lunch tomorrow, then maybe stop by a NA marathon meeting for 2 hours or so. That's all I want to do, so I may just stick with that. Tomorrow is busy, today is free.
I got some very good exchanges about "resentment" this week. To be honest, i work myself up a lot holding on to past mistakes others have made, so that if they ever try to give me advice, I'd just throw those past things in their face.
If that doesn't work, i'll just go off on them. It's very poor thinking, because 95 percent of the people in my life approach me with love, and I'm full of disdain preparing for the fight that just doesn't come often enough. I work myself up a lot. They say, "if it don't apply, let it fly," and that others are allowed to have bad days as well.
Self-centeredness, fear, something new, support
hear those things a lot
just random thoughts as this point, hahah, guess my post is done.
Groovy Dancer
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: The States
Posts: 4,751
Good to hear form you Cleansing! I'm glad you have healthy plans this Holiday. Good you have some support in your life. I tend to harbor some resentment towards others too. Def not healthy and I'd like to let it go.
Oz - Weird. Yesterday I went to the liquor store. This is one of the places I would go to to get my drink, and break it up so I wasn't goin to the same place. The thing about this place is...it is pretty much just a liquor store. The other places I went to sold other stuff, so I have been back there. This place was the first time back since you know when. I went there to get my neighbor a bottle of Bourbon for Christmas. The owner was working...and he'd frequently be there when I stopped, though I tried avoiding him.
Anyway...I realize this story is very boring. Point is, I went to that liquor store. Brought back memories of either goin right to my drink, or bein really cool and walkin around like I was tryin to figure out what to buy before goin to my aisle to get my drink...smooth huh?
Wasn't tempted. Got what I needed. Don't know if the owner recognized me or not.
AG - Hope you get a chance to read some SR over the Holidays.
Hope everyone has a good holiday.
Oz - Weird. Yesterday I went to the liquor store. This is one of the places I would go to to get my drink, and break it up so I wasn't goin to the same place. The thing about this place is...it is pretty much just a liquor store. The other places I went to sold other stuff, so I have been back there. This place was the first time back since you know when. I went there to get my neighbor a bottle of Bourbon for Christmas. The owner was working...and he'd frequently be there when I stopped, though I tried avoiding him.
Anyway...I realize this story is very boring. Point is, I went to that liquor store. Brought back memories of either goin right to my drink, or bein really cool and walkin around like I was tryin to figure out what to buy before goin to my aisle to get my drink...smooth huh?
Wasn't tempted. Got what I needed. Don't know if the owner recognized me or not.
AG - Hope you get a chance to read some SR over the Holidays.
Hope everyone has a good holiday.
Living on a prayer
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: NC
Posts: 234
Merry Christmas Aprillers! Me and the kids are missing hubby/their daddy as he is at sea with his work and won't be home til Feb, but we plan to go to see friends for a few days right after Christmas. I've done a pretty good job at making the holiday as "routine" as possible for them though... same baking, gift wrapping, family games, traditions that we usually do. And hubs is at a port for Christmas so we all get to talk to him on the phone tomorrow. I celebrate my 8 months on the 26th, the day we leave out of town.
Congrats to everyone on their 8th month, onto 9 months and the new year we go!
Congrats to everyone on their 8th month, onto 9 months and the new year we go!
Member
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Lowcountry
Posts: 2,762
Feels great to come back to work after a couple enjoyable, laid back holidays and catch up with our April gang !?!
Just wanted to say; ..Congrats to everyone here !!
Looking forward to bring in 2011 sober with all y'all.
April seems more and more distant, .........even as the time flies.
Just wanted to say; ..Congrats to everyone here !!
Looking forward to bring in 2011 sober with all y'all.
April seems more and more distant, .........even as the time flies.
April 18, 2010
Join Date: Apr 2010
Posts: 1,117
Hey gang made it through Xmas. Lots of hubbub here. I'd be lying if I didn't admit last night (Christmas) ended in tears but luckily in private. Nothing major going on except I have found myself in a negative place emotionally and don't like how ive been feeling an thinking. Actively trying to combat this by writing in my journal to understand my emotions and keeping gratitude lists. Christmas was a mixed bag and on the good side I found joy in some very simple things like the weather and the dessert I made for all. Even though it was a bumpy ride I'm so glad I did it sober! And I have confidence that next year will be easier. Hope you all are well xox AG
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
