August Sobriety Group - pt.8
Owner of a strange glitch.
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: midsouth
Posts: 2,331
Thank y'all...
So far today has been so so... got an hour to worry about stuff right now lol. On the other hand, got a lot of stuff done today so far, office politics and all.
Had a panicky moment, thought today was the 4th, and... that I had missed my class.
Still didn't drink, although, no lie, all morning was hard, and I was shaking, thinking to myself that a drink would calm my nerves at least. That board meeting I just got out of made me feel a lot better. Turns out I'm not so quiet... they don't know (although a couple of them might--haven't hidden getting sober from them but I haven't highlighted it either) the sober me yet.
Welcome back Brent... we're not as crazy without you!
Jason--30 days. Wow.
Take care,
TB
So far today has been so so... got an hour to worry about stuff right now lol. On the other hand, got a lot of stuff done today so far, office politics and all.
Had a panicky moment, thought today was the 4th, and... that I had missed my class.
Still didn't drink, although, no lie, all morning was hard, and I was shaking, thinking to myself that a drink would calm my nerves at least. That board meeting I just got out of made me feel a lot better. Turns out I'm not so quiet... they don't know (although a couple of them might--haven't hidden getting sober from them but I haven't highlighted it either) the sober me yet.
Welcome back Brent... we're not as crazy without you!
Jason--30 days. Wow.
Take care,
TB
Member
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Tucson, AZ
Posts: 957
Everyone!Just popping in to say hello, quite a lot of reading to do.
Things are good on this end, still sober, since July 28 or 29th.
Sure, those thoughts of having a beer pop in my head from time to time, but I know that it will be more like 6 or 8, since I have a problem that once I start, I just can't or won't stop; the goal is to always get drunk.
Hope all is doing well, will check back later, after catching up on how everyone is doing.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Philadelphia, PA area
Posts: 335
Hey everyone! Sounds like so many of us are "back on track." That is great! We can do it!
BD - I agree with you that I need to stay out of some of these social work functions. Last night had been on the calendar for months and since I was the host(ess) and it was at my home, I could not cancel it. But I did fine. My boss actually asked me about it this morning - he said "I never saw you drink beer before - that's a first." I said "well, actually it was non-alcoholic beer" and he said "how did it taste" and I said "awful" and he said "yeah, I heard those things don't taste too good" and that was that. Now this is a guy who I have slammed back many a martini with. And he obviously didn't care. Maybe I think others are going to react in some awful way if I say I am not drinking anymore.
PC - never heard of Kaliber, I will check it out. All they seem to have around here is St. Pauli Girl and O'Douls.
We are going out with a few friends Saturday night and I volunteered to be the designated driver so there will be no questions asked then. They can all whoop it up.
Onward to Day Five......good night everyone.
KC
BD - I agree with you that I need to stay out of some of these social work functions. Last night had been on the calendar for months and since I was the host(ess) and it was at my home, I could not cancel it. But I did fine. My boss actually asked me about it this morning - he said "I never saw you drink beer before - that's a first." I said "well, actually it was non-alcoholic beer" and he said "how did it taste" and I said "awful" and he said "yeah, I heard those things don't taste too good" and that was that. Now this is a guy who I have slammed back many a martini with. And he obviously didn't care. Maybe I think others are going to react in some awful way if I say I am not drinking anymore.
PC - never heard of Kaliber, I will check it out. All they seem to have around here is St. Pauli Girl and O'Douls.
We are going out with a few friends Saturday night and I volunteered to be the designated driver so there will be no questions asked then. They can all whoop it up.
Onward to Day Five......good night everyone.
KC
Guest
Join Date: Jul 2009
Posts: 1,262
Anew -- I do Vinyasa Flow yoga. Just love it. Tonight I went in spite of my dizziness. I did fine, but I did experience some dizziness with some of the poses. Please go away... In the meantime, no alcohol whatsoever. Strict orders from my Mom, who is a nurse. (If she had any idea of the extent of my alcohol problems, she would be saying that all the time... that's why I don't tell her ) So I hope to go to bed and stay away from the vertigo.
I did a bold move and joined an expensive dating service today. I'm not meeting good quality guys on the cheaper dating websites, and they are a ton of work to weed out. I'm sick of the online thing and want to meet real people in person. So I shelled out the cash (actually the credit card) and signed up. I should be having some dates soon.
One of my friends (no names mentioned, Gofish) gave me the brilliant idea to chronicle my dating adventures on a blog. I set one up tonight and have started writing. It is going to be fun, I hope!!! At least if I have a bad date, I can write about it in my blog. It will be a big adventure, if nothing else.
I must go to sleep... I'm always up too late!!!!
G'night!
) So I hope to go to bed and stay away from the vertigo. I did a bold move and joined an expensive dating service today. I'm not meeting good quality guys on the cheaper dating websites, and they are a ton of work to weed out. I'm sick of the online thing and want to meet real people in person. So I shelled out the cash (actually the credit card) and signed up. I should be having some dates soon.
One of my friends (no names mentioned, Gofish) gave me the brilliant idea to chronicle my dating adventures on a blog. I set one up tonight and have started writing. It is going to be fun, I hope!!! At least if I have a bad date, I can write about it in my blog. It will be a big adventure, if nothing else.
I must go to sleep... I'm always up too late!!!!
G'night!
Member
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: The Sunny South
Posts: 1,666
TJ-I believe I am going to try a yoga class. I do/have done pilates, and there is an early morning Bikram yoga class that might work into my schedule. I need to incorporate excercise into my daily life...it really helps with my stress levels. A dating blog...that sounds like fun. I cannot imagine what dating is like these days...I will be married 26 years this month...and you know., there is alot of comfort at this stage and age of my life being together this long.
TC-great to see you here...wow., you are actually in the July class too!!!!! What all is new in your life?
KC-great to see you back, and back on a healthy path. I miss you when you aren't around here with us.
TB-don't keep us in suspense...did you get your license back?
TC-great to see you here...wow., you are actually in the July class too!!!!! What all is new in your life?
KC-great to see you back, and back on a healthy path. I miss you when you aren't around here with us.
TB-don't keep us in suspense...did you get your license back?
Member
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: South Dakota, USA
Posts: 1,429
Thanks for checking in TC. Good for you!!! You are a great success story to this group. Sounds like you have a great handle on your triggers and your sobriety. Keep going, and keep in touch with us.
KC- Good job on volunteering to be the DD. Just be careful. We have a saying that goes "if you hang out in the barbershop long enough, you will eventually get a haircut." Not saying to not go to some of these things, but all in moderation. Ask yourself what YOU can bring to the event. I have found that sometimes it just wouldnt be good for me to go out sometimes. I would either end up drinking (probably not) or be miserable at the fact that I couldn't drink. Either way, if I can't be happy there, I just don't go. And I evaluate these things before I go. Just some tips that have helped me. I think you will find that the more people that know you don't drink, the little it really matters. NO ONE CARES! They really don't. I promise you, its true.
TJ- Good luck with the dating. I hope it works out for you.
Just to throw this out there. My mother in law has been at our house for a few days. My wife told me yesterday that she found my "Big Book." I said good. My wife thought that was weird, and asked me why I didn't care. I told her because I would rather she find out I am in recovery than find out I am a drunk. She smiled, and said "I love you so much." How cool is that? Life is getting good. I am finally happy with my life. I do the best I can do, and if people don't like that, that is their problem. Just some things I am realizing in my life.
Have a great Thursday everyone.
KC- Good job on volunteering to be the DD. Just be careful. We have a saying that goes "if you hang out in the barbershop long enough, you will eventually get a haircut." Not saying to not go to some of these things, but all in moderation. Ask yourself what YOU can bring to the event. I have found that sometimes it just wouldnt be good for me to go out sometimes. I would either end up drinking (probably not) or be miserable at the fact that I couldn't drink. Either way, if I can't be happy there, I just don't go. And I evaluate these things before I go. Just some tips that have helped me. I think you will find that the more people that know you don't drink, the little it really matters. NO ONE CARES! They really don't. I promise you, its true.
TJ- Good luck with the dating. I hope it works out for you.
Just to throw this out there. My mother in law has been at our house for a few days. My wife told me yesterday that she found my "Big Book." I said good. My wife thought that was weird, and asked me why I didn't care. I told her because I would rather she find out I am in recovery than find out I am a drunk. She smiled, and said "I love you so much." How cool is that? Life is getting good. I am finally happy with my life. I do the best I can do, and if people don't like that, that is their problem. Just some things I am realizing in my life.
Have a great Thursday everyone.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: The Sunny South
Posts: 1,666
Awww Brent...reading that just brought a smile to my face...you have such a loving, supportive wife. One thing that I am truly comfortable with is my acknowledgement that I am an alcoholic. For so long., I associated being an alcoholic with shame and guilt..(can we say childhood issues)...maybe it is just my age...but, that shame and guilt is all gone. I am just another person trudging thru life...and I am an alcoholic.
Someone asked me if I was worried about being seen going into an AA meeting, or if it embarassed me. I said no...not at all...and quite frankly.,I believe my more embarassing moments were when I was drinking!!!!
Someone asked me if I was worried about being seen going into an AA meeting, or if it embarassed me. I said no...not at all...and quite frankly.,I believe my more embarassing moments were when I was drinking!!!!
Owner of a strange glitch.
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: midsouth
Posts: 2,331
Well, I gotta do the paperwork still, but... *drumroll* yeah!
My sober self actually made it on time to the class.
And, then, unfortunately, after class, I was so relieved... a pressure was lifted from my shoulders. Those classes had been putting more stress on me than I think I knew. I've been taking them for about a year and a half, so I guess the stress got absorbed with everything else, but the minute I stepped out of that building, I felt free and ready to fly again...
Not in a good way (I do not have a pilot's license lol). I called my sponsor, then some other people. Turns out mini-Armageddon (what happens in my mind every so often--and 'good' usually wins out, but when 'bad' wins is when I get to drinking) spoken out loud to a stranger sounds like I've been drinking. Haha. It was pouring rain and I was only in a sweatshirt--it had been about 70 degrees and sunny with nary a cloud when I had left--and I was miserable. Plus, I was conveniently located in 2 places I'd lived before, back before I went to school and still had friends to hang out with... that's where the bus connections were. Almost 2 hours all told in the rain, getting wet, knowing exactly where the cheapest liquor stores and bars are in the vicinity... and risking running into people I knew then, who would most likely feel obligated to give me a ride... and I to take it or cause a scene/ reaffirm the belief that I've "changed" since going to school.
Anyways, turns out it's MTA (bus company) for the win. Although both transfer points were high-risk-for-drinking areas for me, the bus got me home at 11:45. Stores around here all close at 11, and license or no license, I don't care to drive Southern California streets in the rain.
Today I woke up better. Just pushing it for time as I type this instead of taking a shower... oh well. One class, and all day free, so...
Take care,
TB, living very much in the moment like they say to do.
My sober self actually made it on time to the class.
And, then, unfortunately, after class, I was so relieved... a pressure was lifted from my shoulders. Those classes had been putting more stress on me than I think I knew. I've been taking them for about a year and a half, so I guess the stress got absorbed with everything else, but the minute I stepped out of that building, I felt free and ready to fly again...
Not in a good way (I do not have a pilot's license lol). I called my sponsor, then some other people. Turns out mini-Armageddon (what happens in my mind every so often--and 'good' usually wins out, but when 'bad' wins is when I get to drinking) spoken out loud to a stranger sounds like I've been drinking. Haha. It was pouring rain and I was only in a sweatshirt--it had been about 70 degrees and sunny with nary a cloud when I had left--and I was miserable. Plus, I was conveniently located in 2 places I'd lived before, back before I went to school and still had friends to hang out with... that's where the bus connections were. Almost 2 hours all told in the rain, getting wet, knowing exactly where the cheapest liquor stores and bars are in the vicinity... and risking running into people I knew then, who would most likely feel obligated to give me a ride... and I to take it or cause a scene/ reaffirm the belief that I've "changed" since going to school.
Anyways, turns out it's MTA (bus company) for the win. Although both transfer points were high-risk-for-drinking areas for me, the bus got me home at 11:45. Stores around here all close at 11, and license or no license, I don't care to drive Southern California streets in the rain.
Today I woke up better. Just pushing it for time as I type this instead of taking a shower... oh well. One class, and all day free, so...
Take care,
TB, living very much in the moment like they say to do.
Guest
Join Date: Jul 2009
Posts: 1,262
Long day at work... just got home a while ago. At around 6:30 pm, all the fun/cool people in the office (well, everyone is cool, so let me just say the younger folks) decided to go to a nearby pub. After working really hard all day, I have to say the idea of a cold pint sounded really good (and I'm not even a beer drinker!) I had to turn it down because I have a family to get home to who needs me. Stopped at Five Guys Burgers on the way home for dinner (and diet coke for me). And later tonight I'm going to see the Midnight Showing of Johnny Depp in Alice in Wonderland with my daughter!!! It'll be in 3-D and OPENING DAY!!!!
So everything is good, and I'm continuing to take things one day at a time. Vertigo is somewhat disappearing, so I hope it's all temporary.
I got a call today that my first two dates are lined up. She described them to me and they sounded great! Of course, anyone can make anyone sound great if they try. So we shall see. My dating blog will be lots of fun for me in any event.
Have a great Thursday night, all!
So everything is good, and I'm continuing to take things one day at a time. Vertigo is somewhat disappearing, so I hope it's all temporary.
I got a call today that my first two dates are lined up. She described them to me and they sounded great! Of course, anyone can make anyone sound great if they try. So we shall see. My dating blog will be lots of fun for me in any event.
Have a great Thursday night, all!
Member
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Philadelphia, PA area
Posts: 335
TB - great news on your license.
TJ - would love to read your blog. I bet it could be quite interesting!
I am thinking of starting one about the things men do that drive their wives/girlfriends crazy or leave them scratching their heads. Don't mean to offend you guys out here, but I am sure you have done something at least once in your relationship that drives your wife crazy, just like we probably do the same for you, right? For example, my husband decided to help me out by "cleaning" under the kitchen sink. Now I have NEVER ONCE thought about deep cleaning under the kitchen sink before. Sure, I wipe it down all the time, but no deep clean. So he emptied it all out and poured bleach straight on to the surface and let it soak. Well, it soaked alright, it ate the entire finish off of the surface and it is all blistered and bubbled up. The floor is ruined, but it is spotless under the sink. In fact it is so clean, you could probably eat off of the surface. Guys - help me out here - any idea why you would suddenly decide that the area underneath the sink needs to be sterilized with bleach? I asked my husband and he just shrugged his shoulders. LOL! The start of my blog
On to Day Six. I am feeling much better without the alcohol. Hope it stays that way.
TJ - would love to read your blog. I bet it could be quite interesting!
I am thinking of starting one about the things men do that drive their wives/girlfriends crazy or leave them scratching their heads. Don't mean to offend you guys out here, but I am sure you have done something at least once in your relationship that drives your wife crazy, just like we probably do the same for you, right? For example, my husband decided to help me out by "cleaning" under the kitchen sink. Now I have NEVER ONCE thought about deep cleaning under the kitchen sink before. Sure, I wipe it down all the time, but no deep clean. So he emptied it all out and poured bleach straight on to the surface and let it soak. Well, it soaked alright, it ate the entire finish off of the surface and it is all blistered and bubbled up. The floor is ruined, but it is spotless under the sink. In fact it is so clean, you could probably eat off of the surface. Guys - help me out here - any idea why you would suddenly decide that the area underneath the sink needs to be sterilized with bleach? I asked my husband and he just shrugged his shoulders. LOL! The start of my blog
On to Day Six. I am feeling much better without the alcohol. Hope it stays that way.
Member
Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 14,916
Well we guys could certainly start a blog about the women in our life and what they do that drives us crazy. And right now that woman in my life is my boss. She is an arrogant, mean spirited, mentally deranged, dictator who only cares about herself. I'm one of the top 2 or 3 people in the organization, and I've always been supportive, but after the crap she has pulled the past week she has lost my support, at least privately. I need my job so I can't say anything, but she is pretty much hated from top to bottom in the organization. I was one of her few supporters. Now I'm praying that she get's hit by a meteorite or a bolt of lighting.
Guest
Join Date: Jul 2009
Posts: 1,262
Nice ideas for blogs, guys! It gets the creative juices flowing. I was in the shower this morning and got the idea for the second installment of my blog. It was all worked out in my head, and then when I went down to type it... writer's block. I walked away for a bit, came back and got it together, more or less like I had planned in the shower.
I think blogging is fun, and in many ways, therapeutic.
Off to the midnight movie. I must be crazy leaving my nice warm bed to go out to the movies!
I think blogging is fun, and in many ways, therapeutic.
Off to the midnight movie. I must be crazy leaving my nice warm bed to go out to the movies!
Meow
Join Date: Jul 2009
Location: The Great Lakes State
Posts: 1,585
Zebra, I totally understand. During my year long job from Hell, I would have been quite happy if one of the board members had decided to disappear for a very extended vacation. Would have made my life a lot less miserable! However, she was far too evil to want to make my life any easier, so she stuck around. She's still there, and I occasionally see her at professional conferences. I don't talk to her, though, and she doesn't talk to me. That suits me just fine.
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