Believe808

Barb I missed you How are you doing girlfriend? Haven't seen you on the other site either? You okay?

HideorSeek

.....whispering...the one at work.....

PR has great advice, Nan..about your hubby. Sobriety is an adjustment for everyone. Old dynamics are withering, and you are stretching and growing. It's destabilizing, that's for sure. Patience is the name of the game, IMHO.

PR...you love to cook so much, if it's feasible, why not distribute flyers yourself??? Just thinking out loud....

HideorSeek

Hiya Barb!

scaredykat

Yep, I'm OK. My video game addiction is really bad lately. I quit smoking again. Day 8 today. So I've been playing a lot of games. One good thing i met a girl on the Gamesgames site that lives 5 miles down the road from me. How cool is that! She gave me my 1st present on there too. I got a bunny. LOL

Still sober, going to my meetings, my story got publish in our local AA paper. I haven't told too many people except my sponser and close friends.

scaredykat

Hi HideorSeek

Believe808

Wow Barb that is great!!!! (Clapping hands, can't find the smiley)

Lis, the Mom is okay, I just watch myself with her, feed her what I need to, she is a nice woman, I just dread to think what her home must look like the way she saves things

Believe808

I haven't been over to the games site in soooooo long. That is cool about the girl you met. Barb, again that's awesome about your story being printed.

scaredykat

Well time for lunch and my soaps. Talk to you guys later.

scaredykat

Bee.

You should go on there again sometime Believe. There's new things on there and New games. Animal Rescue is cute. I'm also addicted to the new Mahjong game.

Bye everyone.

parentrecovers

your plan is approved


HOWDY, SCAREDY!

parentrecovers

oh, i'll do the cooking plan. i've got a handful of folks interested. if i can just make enough cash to buy for my daughter for the holidays, it'll be worth it.

all those who rejected the idea, they get coal (lol!)

my mother called me this morning, and she is onboard to support me. she is mailing me a darling little angel cookie cutter and some sweet pink sprinkles she bought this weekend at a kitchen shop. i love my mom.

Rowan

Hi and bye Barb - nice to 'see' you - and well done on getting your story published.

Nan - you got some good advice - I hope you enjoy your day. I love having days to myself. Seems they are few and far between these days.

K - I would be cranky too. I think your idea bears much merit and they are foolish to NOT back you. I hope you don't give up on it.

Stone - I'm sorry for your pain. Sometimes, the best we can do on days like these is hang on by the skin of our teeth. Ride it out. Tie a knot in your rope and hang on. All this and more. I do understand.

I'm feeling lethargic today and in days' past I think it's my med since I adjusted it. My mood seemed better for a time but now it's not. I shouldn't be messing around with dosages like this. I'll go back to regular dosage and wait it out until I see the pdoc which is on November 18th.

I only work until Thursday, then off Friday for my testing, off for the weekend, Monday is a holiday, and Tuesday I'm taking the day off to visit the spa and soak in the hot baths. I'm just putting one foot in front of the other until my time off - I sorely need it. It feels good, though, to have worked as hard as I have been.

louis

I got scared today... (sorry... this may be long but i need to talk)

I forgot HALT today... went straight from a 24hr shift into the office to do paper work so was tired....
I was meant to have a meeting with someone and they got pulled out into another meetng.... they were laughing and carrying on and i could think was actually you were in your bed at home last night... i was work (real resentment time)...

An hour and a half later they decided to finish there meeting and go for a coffee and smoke break... i just snapped... i needed out the office...

Then it hit me... i need to gamble... not i want.. i need.... and within an instant it turned to i relly want/need to drink... i need not to feel like this.. my emotions were all over the place...

My sponsor was at a meeting down the road... this building has a chapel in it where i did my 3rd step... i just thought if i can get there i would be fine... i recited the 3rd step and serenity prayer over and over until i reached the church... (passing the pubs and bookies)...

When i got to the meeting it was nearly over so i didnt want to go in... i thought i could just spend some time in the church... i know this sounds weird but i just wanted to touch base... ground myself... there were people in the way so i just hung round outside til my sponsor came out... she couldnt talk cos she was with someone...

I left and went straight to the bookies.... blew some money (i cant afford).. and then when i left i bumped into someone i used to drink with... they asked where i was going... i said back to work... they asked if i wanted ot go for a drink but i said i cant... not i dont want to... that scared me..

As we talked my phone started going... it was my sponsor.... i said quick goodbyes and left... i had a good chat with my sponsor... the urge was so strong....

Im at home now... the urge is still coming and going but not as intense... im just real tired...
I know i should be at a meeting but i just really need to sleep.... im going to a meeting wednesday.. back to work in the morning for another 24hr shift....

Sorry... I just needed to get that out... cunning, baffling, powerful...

stone

It's not that much pain it is chronic fatigue with some aching and muscle weakness and stiffness, mostly fatigue though. Just getting that clear, lol.

I had to go to bed, I just woke up, ordered an Indian meal to be delivered.

parentrecovers

i hope you can get some rest. maybe if ya can't sleep, that meeting would do ya some good ..

prayers and support to you, louis. good job on reaching out to your sponsor and here at sr.

k

IO Storm

louis..

Cunning,baffling,and powerful! It is...but the urges will pass..they do.

Sharing about it, "getting out" always helps. Your honesty about your feelings, not

acting on them, and asking for help is rewarded by another minute, hour, and another

day of sobriety. Don't be so hard on yourself for caving in to gambling thing.

Sometimes...one thing at a time is removed.

But don't render yourself penniless..for the self beating may lead to an excuse to

drink. Actually..no beating yourself up at all!

Thoughts and prayers with you today!


Hey to everyone else..

Stoney)))))

Love you....this too shall pass too...

And Anono, congrats on working your program too..

parentrecovers

feelin' a bit down today, so i am going to force myself to do 2 hours of yard work. lol! the fresh air and exercise always makes me feel better, and at least i can feel a bit accomplished?

time to start dumpin the pots and putting stuff away - then, we can get firewood!



stay strong, louis. and don't drink, no matter what..

HideorSeek

Louis...I echo what IQ said...she's sooooooooo smart

Every so often the thought of a drink comes out of the blue (invariably some permutation of HALT). I used to act on it without thinking...now I think on it without acting. We DO need to reach out and talk, talk, talk, or listen, listen, listen or a little of both....you did all the right things. BRAVO!!!!! And the next time, you will remember this day and be that much more resistant.

Cunning, baffling and very patient and sneaky.

Rowan

Sorry for your struggle, louis, but real proud of you. You did well. Here's hoping you wake up feeling refreshed, with the thoughts of a drink no longer lurking. Hugs.

K - hugs to you too. Sorry you're feeling down. I'm proud of you for taking action even when you feel this way. You're a good source of inspiration for me.

IO Storm

KK))))))

Sis)))))

Liz))))) thank you Liz, for the compliment! Not so smart, just "been there done that"....

And, louis...

KK's advice... "Don't drink no matter what!"...was a lifesaver for me.