stone

Feeling substantially better now, dunno what happened there. Still haven't slept.

It is looking likely that I will see a Psych.

allport

Glad you are feeling better Stone.

I also had a bit of an emotional day yesterday, I was great all day and then had a little cry before bed, nothing major but I am the least cryie person in the world and this is the second time this week!

I don't really know how to deal with it (either the happy day or the crying) but I do know it isn't making me feel like drinking, so thats ok.

It pretty weird when people say they care isn't it, freaks me out but I'm trying to take things on face value, a bit of trust is going on which also is not me!

Maybe I am finally growing up

Please keep updating on the belly button situation lol.

And have a sober day. x

stone

Hi Porty, I don't cry either. I thought about it when I was crying and realised it was the first time for years.

I wonder if intimacy or self-esteem issues come into find it hard to accept people care fro us? Still though I was rambling at that point, I just knew I felt bleak and weirdly so.

And yea, I didn't feel like drinking during it, and haven't at all really for the last week, maybe just once or something.

Still no sleep!

Have a good day Porty!

espresso

They say when we stop drinking/using...the 'good' news is we get our feelings back, the 'bad' news is we get our feelings back....

I wonder if there is a "Sunday" syndrome....I feel a bit lethargic and fed up today and for no apparent reason. Yesterday I was my usual self!!!!

stone

It wasn't like I was drinking everyday prior to this Ess, but it might still apply as it is the longest I have gone for quite some time so I have not been using oblivion to escape my feelings when I felt bad. It could have just been building up, like Nands was suggesting.

espresso

Stone, didn't mean it like that (that you were drinking everyday prior to "this")
It can just hit you once you've stopped, or creep up on you if you like once your body has got all the booze out of it ( and that takes a while) plus you've got depression...and it's Sunday!!!
:ghug

stone

I didn't mean that you meant it like that, lol. But yea, it could still be drinking (not drinking) related, rather than the bi-polar I am wondering about....whether I have it or not.

Could be a bit of both...and Sunday!

least

Hope your Sunday turns out ok. I shall be sober today and that's a good thing. And I DO love ya! Even from across the pond! Love doesn't recognize geographical distance.

stone

Ditto Leasty.

stone

Through all these mood swings etc, I am still sober and glad to be sober so that is a positive and something to be grateful for.

parentrecovers

gratitude is good. hugs to ya, stone..

IO Storm

What Nands said..

Glad you are better today though! :ghug3:

stone

Hi K, yep, gratitiude is good.

Sher, I dunno, it might just be early recovery mood swings, it might be feeling feelings....

Thanks, I do feel better, I just need some damn sleep now!

IO Storm

Playing my flute for ya..Celtic melody across the pond, babes

stone

I hope it works, I am gonna try again, lol.

paulmh

I can't cure my self-obssession with self-obssession! Whatever it is, it is what it is.

Think of others. Do something. Do something for others! The constant self-monitoring will go away, eventually. It's a waste of ******* time anyway!

Rowan

Yeah I think Paul's on to something - the whole self-analysis thing -it doesn't change anything, once we know why we feel what we are feeling. It's enough (for me) to know I feel like shite - and that I must do something about it. Whether it's something for myself, or for someone else - I gotta take some sort of action.

stone

I was just sayin, lol.

It is supposed to be a journal of how I am doing, I could just keep stuff to myself I suppose? Might be bi-polar, better shut up about it...

Haven't slept for 2 days, don't write it in your journal though. Might bore people.

Having mood swings doesn't mean I am monitoring myself, it is kind of hard to ignore them.

IO Storm

For me, it is self care time..tuna sammich and a nap. Try to get some rest, Stoney.



Just sayin'

Horselover

Hi Stoney - Sorry to read you're having a hard time, but glad to hear you are talking about it. Keeping stuff inside us is bad, bad, bad! I like this Serious thread you've started and I think its definitely helped you as well others. It was a great idea! Our emotions are sometimes so hard to deal with, but at least we are "dealing" with them. Hugs!!