mtnmagic

Hi malibumermaid and welcome. BTW I love your name!

Thank you so much for posting. I really, really identify with FALP. Boy do I ever! I drank a lot for the reasons you describe. I would also drink at my frustration of the bf not doing what I thought he should be doing to make our relationship better, thereby making it much worse itself. What a viscious cycle it was. Lot's of wreckage there and with both my son's (both grown) also.

Congratulations on 27 days. Wow incredible insight you have. Hope to get to know you better. Thanks again.

shanman422

Welcome Malibumermaid... I almost wrote Malibu Bay Breeze... oh good lord... haha! I too identify with with FALP... thanks for sharing your insight on that!

This is a fantastic place for support... I hope you keep reading and posting. I wouldn't be on DAY 27 (same as you) if I hadn't found this amazing site. Looking forward to getting to know ya.

Shannon

grrrr

Cool, another person on 27 days! Something must have been in the water around that time... Good to have you here malibumermaid! Keep posting and feel free to ramble!

I can relate to FALP too. I am very controlling and have definitely used alcohol to control feelings I didn't like. I felt like I understood my triggers, but have really only taken a cursory look at them. Your post reminds me I still have a lot of homework to do in my recovery.

mtnmagic

Boy isn't that the truth grrrr? We have a lot of looking to do, don't we?
So glad we are all on this journey together. Glad to know you got FALP too
Shanman. Just means we have more in common. more to work on together.

Work went ok. Got off early tonight, slow shift and am getting ready for my nightly ritual books, tea and me in bed. Sleep well all.

shanman422

Good Morning Friends, how is everyone feeling today? I'm not sure how I am right now... I'm happy today is 28 days sober, but I'm in a bit of a funk. Maybe i'm just tired from working a lot this weekend.

I have been getting more and more urges lately. At my second job I am usually around it all night (catering gig). I smell it and see people starting to getting 'loopy'. It hasn't been so hard where I can't stand the situation thank goodness.

Obviously, I'm hear for a reason, I'm an alcoholic so drinking is always on my mind... especially right now in the early stages. I'm keeping myself busy and I'm doing my best to retrain my mind! I've worked really hard the last month. I'm kinda selfish in the way that I would hate to start over at day 1 again. I am so early in recovery, but WOW, 28 days... I love putting more and more sober days behind me. I'm just gonna keep on trucking... I'm not as weak as I thought I was, I'm taking one day at a time and I'm actually doing this!! Of course with the help of my friends here at SR.... Oh man, I wouldn't be able to this without you.

Okay... have I rambled on enough? Sorry... I had to get that out I guess... haha!

Have a wonderful Sunday!!!! Hugs to all

mtnmagic

Day 34 for me. I'm feeling a little cranky and ornery today. Over what I don't have a clue. Last night at work there was some tension between a coworker and myself. He was rude to me and even mocked me. I was furious in return and didn't handle myself very well. Management intervened and hauled us in the office one at a time. I thought I had really gotten myself in trouble now. Well, after it was said and done, the manager came out and said this person was definitely in the wrong and would be apologizing to me. She said that all my other coworkers stuck up for me and said he was inappropriate. I burst in to tears. Not usual behavior at all for me. Sigh.
Handling emotions sober is tough.

On a brighter note, I've been meaning to share with you all something. When I received a thirty day chip earlier this week, a woman in the room who creates jewelry presented me with a necklace. She enclosed a note. It said that the necklace had thirty stones, all just a little different and none of them perfect. The thirty stones represented each of my 30 days of sobriety.
I was so touched by the gesture, yup I burst into tears again.

As Shanman has said, all of your support here does mean the world to me too.

grrrr

mtnmagic, that is great! Not that you are feeling cranky , but that some really good things happened to you. The necklace sounds really thoughtful, and it is great that your coworkers are on your side. I guess crying is something that "normal" people do sometimes, so we might have to get used to it. I know when I first told my closest friends/family that I needed to stop drinking I cried a bit each time.

Shanman - I totally relate to being too stubborn to start all of this over again. I made a decision and am sticking to it this time. That sucks that you have to be around alcohol in your job; it has been bothering me being around drinkers in some situations.

Happy Sunday to everyone! I am relaxing and watching football all day. Feeling pretty good, excited about 4 weeks today. Still dealing with headaches occasionally, but I do have more energy. ODAAT :ghug2

Ross683

Hi, i am new to this site stumbled across it looking for help to stop drinking. The thing is i would like to stop but have tried and failed so many times, not had any help in trying to stop no AA ect. I am 35 years old and feel drink is holding me back, big time. Its not a daily thing for me but i tend to drink 3 or 4 days if i am honest a week, cant function properly the next day really bad anxiety and just in pieces . Iv tried to stop and got as far as 3 weeks before, felt great. Does anyone have any advice they could give me about the best way to go about it and any tips. Many thanks

grrrr

Hi Ross,
Glad you found SR. I think most of us on this site can relate to having a lot of day 1's before it really stuck.
I would suggest checking out the Newcomers to Recovery Forum and perhaps posting a new thread in there. SR has a lot of supportive people and information. Here is a link of some folks experiences with detox and quitting.
What To Expect Thread

I found the book "Under the Influence" to be extremely helpful. There are some excerpts from that book posted on the site as well. Keep reading and posting. There are a lot of people here that can relate to your situation.

K

mtnmagic

Hi Ross683. Wanted to welcome you to SR. Keep reading, keep posting.
grrrr gave you some great suggestions. It can be a little slow around here on the weekends, but someone is always around 24/7. Posting here is a huge step to take a look at any problem with alcohol and/or drugs.

mtnmagic

Another day down for me. Hope all the rest of you are doing ok...
Check in when you have the time.

shanman422

Hiya and Good Morning!

I am in a very good mood so far today... I have finally reached 30 days... and it's my husbands birthday. What is it with guys not remembering or caring about there birthdays? I said happy birthday right when he woke up and he said "I would have forgotten if you didn't say somthing". Awww, not sure about the ladies in here, but everyone knows about my birthday weeks in advance... haha!

Anyways... Happy Tuesday Everyone!! XOXO

grrrr

Guess they just don't want to get older!! Glad you have your 30 days to celebrate too. Have a lot of fun today!!!

mtnmagic

A Huge Congratulations on your 30 days Shanman and grrrr....

Hey Shanman wrap yourself in a big bow and tell your husband that
this thirty days is the best gift you could give him for his birthday. Because it is!

grrrr - Are you going to do anything special for yourself to honor your accomplishment?

So very glad that we are doing this together.

grrrr

Nothing special for today. But I did feel very happy this morning and good all day long. Went to the store and bought a good teapot!! I am looking forward to some hot cider tonight though. The simple things are so much better when I am not worrying about my next high.

I found this site almost 4 years ago!! I can't explain how I used to feel reading other people's posts that were making progress in their sobriety and just couldn't figure out how they did it. (Since we all seem to share so much, maybe y'all can relate easily! ) I was finally able to admit that I couldn't smoke or drink in moderation and that it all needed to stop. Anyone can do this, I feel like proof of that. It is worth all the hard work.

NewDayNow

We remember our birthdays. It's just that we can't let on that we Remember. It's ok. It's a man thing. A sacred trust. Don't worry about it shan.

Trust me on this one

Ed

shanman422

Thanks ED... good to know!

Magic... that was in my plans (minus the bow...haha) but when he got home he was in a funk But we still had a nice evening together.

I had bad dreams though last night that my husband was a bad boy and wanted to leave me... so I woke up this morning mad at him. haha... I was cranky because of a dream... can you believe that? I'm still a little on edge today, but hopefully something I will get out of soon.

I have good plans tonight to have one of my best friends over. My son and her daughter are BFF's as well, we get such pleasure out of watching them play together. And it's a good opportunity for us to catch up on how each other is doing. She is the one friend that I have told about being an alcoholic. She sent me an ecard yesterday for achieving 30 days of sobriety. She's a good one, I think I'll keep her!! hehe

Have a great hump day all!

justforme

i guess i can move on over to this thread! 31 days...

Ross683

Thanks for the advice Grrrr and mtnmagic. I am on day 4 without any alcohol and feeling good. Think i sleep a lot better when not drinking have been waking earlier and walking my dogs as sun comes up. Really glad i found this site. Thanks again Ross:bounce

mtnmagic

grrrr - Glad you had a good day. A teapot huh, now that is a good idea.
Maybe I need to get me one of those. That's why I love this place.
I get some good ideas here. I know exactly what you mean about coming
on here and seeing everybody progress. I joined two years ago in December.
I would reach out a bit, relapse, retreat,come back and only read (like it could rub off on me or something.) I would feel as if I knew so many people
on here. It was like looking through a window with me outside in the dark and all the people on the other side were so brave and wonderful. Eck, talk about lonley and feeling like an utter failure. I couldn't even bring myself
to post. Sure glad that has changed for both of us.

Shanman - I hope the visit with your friend and the kids help get you out of your edgy place for awhile. Funny how some dreams can affect us so much.

Hey deerwalk - Welcome and congratulations on 43 days. Sounds like you are aware of your triggers and are able to deal with them. Yep some days suck it up and move on is as good as it gets. Hope you have a peaceful and serene night.

Ed - Thanks for the inside info on men and their birthdays. I like it. If there are any other man things you would like to impart, believe me I'd be all ears, or in this case eyes, lol...Hope to see you posting here more, even if it isn't manthings!

Woo Hoo - justforme 31 days. About time, we've been saving a seat here.
Huge congratulations to you. So here we go, one more day, right?

Hi Ross - Glad you came back and posted. Day 4 is fantastic. Keep it up.
I'm not a morning person, especially not up with the sun. I have noticed that
I get up earlier though and my dog (who was neglected for awhile) certainly is getting more walks. Good for you. Let us know how you are doing ok?

Me, I had three days off again. It is getting easier to fill my time off. I'm not as afraid of the unstructured time as I used to be. I guess my horizons are broadening or something. Any hoo it feels better to be busy. I seem to
have more energy too. Vitamins must finally be kicking in. Depression is lessening too. All in all things are better, but I have a long way to go.