JFT May 15 - Fear of the 4th Step
 

May 15

Fear of the Fourth Step

“As we approach this step, most of us are afraid that there is a monster inside of us that, if released, will destroy us.”

Most of us are terrified to look at ourselves, to probe our insides. We’re afraid that if we examine our actions and motives, we’ll find a bottomless black pit of selfishness and hatred. But as we take the Fourth Step, we’ll find that those fears were unwarranted. We’re human, just like everyone else—no more, no less.

We all have personality traits that we’re not especially proud of. On a bad day, we may think that our faults are worse than anyone else’s. We’ll have moments of self-doubt. We’ll question our motives. We may even question our very existence. But if we could read the minds of our fellow members, we’d find the same struggles. We’re no better or worse than anyone else.

We can only change what we acknowledge and understand. Rather than continuing to fear what’s buried inside us, we can bring it out into the open. We’ll no longer be frightened, and our recovery will flourish in the full light of self-awareness.


Just for today: I fear what I don’t know. I will expose my fears and allow them to vanish.



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I was scared of doing my first step 4 but I got it over with and I found it cathartic. I am coming up to do another step 4 and now I truly relish it. I want to search and dig and see for me to expose all areas to the sun. So that if there is any rot it can be burned away by recognition and the light of sharing it with my sponsor.

That is what recovery is about for me.

Thank you for letting me share.