Just a vent...
To Life!
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: Rhode Island
Posts: 9,293
Thank you, Alera... 
I did indeed enjoy the concert.
And you know, maybe that's why I was meant to have the tickets. As a way to enjoy before the impending doom. Because, honestly, I have very negative vibes coming from this information. I'm not dwelling on them, but, it would be a lie to say it isn't so.
I really believe everyone should take a day to rejuvinate. In Judaism, it's Friday night till Saturday night, (sundown). The Catholic tradition is Sunday. And for Muslims, I believe it's Friday. Point is, it doesn't matter. What matters is to put down the concerns of the world and enjoy the benefits and the beauty. Everyone deserves that release.
Shalom!
I did indeed enjoy the concert.
And you know, maybe that's why I was meant to have the tickets. As a way to enjoy before the impending doom. Because, honestly, I have very negative vibes coming from this information. I'm not dwelling on them, but, it would be a lie to say it isn't so.
I really believe everyone should take a day to rejuvinate. In Judaism, it's Friday night till Saturday night, (sundown). The Catholic tradition is Sunday. And for Muslims, I believe it's Friday. Point is, it doesn't matter. What matters is to put down the concerns of the world and enjoy the benefits and the beauty. Everyone deserves that release.
Shalom!
To Life!
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: Rhode Island
Posts: 9,293
Trevor just called me. He said he didn't think I was aware of what the information meant. That interferon only has a 50% chance of working. Of course, his kidney problem on top of that only makes the entire situation worse. He said he doesn't think he'll live to the end of his sentence...
Trevor can be melodramatic. But, he wasn't hysterical. I know he's scared. He said he started going to church again. I told him to pray.
One day at a time. That's all we can do. That, and pray for the best possible outcome.
Shalom!
Trevor can be melodramatic. But, he wasn't hysterical. I know he's scared. He said he started going to church again. I told him to pray.
One day at a time. That's all we can do. That, and pray for the best possible outcome.
Shalom!
On a tear
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: Volcano Country!
Posts: 3,221
Dammit.
I came in here to get caught up, Teach.... and I am so sorry for what you are going through. Sending prayers... real, heartfelt, tangible prayers... for healing for Trevor - right this minute. That he remains in God's will and willing to be there.
As far as the job thing... I think you know I lost a job I loved after steadily promoting over 13 years. I went from a keypunch operator to program manager for three statewide programs, one with national connections. Yet, within 8 days of her arrival, I was submitting my resignation to a new director. I have never undergone the sort of treatment she put me through, for no reason other (I found out later) than she didn't trust any of the old directors' "picks"... me and my 4 coworkers.
All four of us (in a 5 person office) were eventually fired using the exact same methodology... overloading us with memos (catalog the contents of file cabinet A, have the catalog on my desk by 1:oo this afternoon, failure to follow this directive may result in disciplinary action), overloading us with "make work" during our busiest times in order to try to get us to falter on the important tasks, removing resources, being unavailable to approve urgent decisions... essentially undermining our work until we appeared incompetent.
Just so she could hire trusted friends.
That job was the best job I had ever had. I had grown and changed and evolved in that job in a way that had never happened to me before. My identity was enmeshed inexorably with the job title. Losing that job, I lost a bit of me...no, I lost a lot of me.
What I know today is that I had become comfortable and nested and intractible. God needed me to be somewhere else because, I believe, He could see the storm that was coming into my life. I needed to be in a job that allowed me to focus on family first - as the one I have now does. I needed to be able to attribute the loss of the program manager job to circumstances beyond my control - and not to the antics of my addicted children. I held HUGE ... perhaps still hold... HUGE resentments against that woman director for what she put me, my customers, and my coworkers through. I am grateful that resentment is not directed at my children and their addictions.
Looking back, I can see that I had opportunities to change jobs... and ignored those opportunities. I finally left when it became too painful to stay.
I am sorry this is going on at a time when you need your life to be serene enough to best focus on the good things in life. Perhaps it is a way of allowing you to move on because the next stop on the line is where you need to be...
My customers were injured when I left - some lost professional credentials because the woman arbitrarily changed processes and procedures. I worried about them, but could not help them in any way... I figure HP has a broader view and those affected were also directly under His care and guidance.
I pray that as this door closes that the window God opens will be so clear and inviting, you won't even question choosing to fling it open and see what is on the other side.
((((Teach)))))
I came in here to get caught up, Teach.... and I am so sorry for what you are going through. Sending prayers... real, heartfelt, tangible prayers... for healing for Trevor - right this minute. That he remains in God's will and willing to be there.
As far as the job thing... I think you know I lost a job I loved after steadily promoting over 13 years. I went from a keypunch operator to program manager for three statewide programs, one with national connections. Yet, within 8 days of her arrival, I was submitting my resignation to a new director. I have never undergone the sort of treatment she put me through, for no reason other (I found out later) than she didn't trust any of the old directors' "picks"... me and my 4 coworkers.
All four of us (in a 5 person office) were eventually fired using the exact same methodology... overloading us with memos (catalog the contents of file cabinet A, have the catalog on my desk by 1:oo this afternoon, failure to follow this directive may result in disciplinary action), overloading us with "make work" during our busiest times in order to try to get us to falter on the important tasks, removing resources, being unavailable to approve urgent decisions... essentially undermining our work until we appeared incompetent.
Just so she could hire trusted friends.
That job was the best job I had ever had. I had grown and changed and evolved in that job in a way that had never happened to me before. My identity was enmeshed inexorably with the job title. Losing that job, I lost a bit of me...no, I lost a lot of me.
What I know today is that I had become comfortable and nested and intractible. God needed me to be somewhere else because, I believe, He could see the storm that was coming into my life. I needed to be in a job that allowed me to focus on family first - as the one I have now does. I needed to be able to attribute the loss of the program manager job to circumstances beyond my control - and not to the antics of my addicted children. I held HUGE ... perhaps still hold... HUGE resentments against that woman director for what she put me, my customers, and my coworkers through. I am grateful that resentment is not directed at my children and their addictions.
Looking back, I can see that I had opportunities to change jobs... and ignored those opportunities. I finally left when it became too painful to stay.
I am sorry this is going on at a time when you need your life to be serene enough to best focus on the good things in life. Perhaps it is a way of allowing you to move on because the next stop on the line is where you need to be...
My customers were injured when I left - some lost professional credentials because the woman arbitrarily changed processes and procedures. I worried about them, but could not help them in any way... I figure HP has a broader view and those affected were also directly under His care and guidance.
I pray that as this door closes that the window God opens will be so clear and inviting, you won't even question choosing to fling it open and see what is on the other side.
((((Teach)))))
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,469
BigSis,
I love your post! You talk about dealing with change, that we often don't want to deal with. And, also being able to use your perspective to see that the change was, indeed the best thing that could have happened to you at that point in your life.
Teach,
I am so sorry and I continue to pray for Trevor and you.
I love your post! You talk about dealing with change, that we often don't want to deal with. And, also being able to use your perspective to see that the change was, indeed the best thing that could have happened to you at that point in your life.
Teach,
I am so sorry and I continue to pray for Trevor and you.
To Life!
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: Rhode Island
Posts: 9,293
BigSis;
Yes, I remember that time very well. And I'm so happy that, in retrospect, things are better, and you don't have any resentments towards your children as a result.
Yep, I'd say that's exactly what this guy is doing too. Along with a fishiing expedition to "find" something wrong. He actually asked my freshmen to give him examples, in writing, of what I do wrong. Here's an example.
"Ms K is nice when you're in the room, but not nice when you're not." (Speaking of the principal himself....
And he thinks this is not undermining me! Ay!
Thank you for your wonderful prayers.
I sincerely hope Trevor can get past all this and find his way home.
Anna, thanks too for your prayers. And I agree, BigSis has wonderful examples of recovery. What was; what changed and how it is now. She's a shining example of recovery.
And now, I'm seeing how depressed I am getting. It's almost 2:30 in the afternoon, and I'm still in my pjs. I've accomplished nothing all day, though I have to write up the grievance and correct papers. *sigh*
Gotta get going!
Shalom!
Yes, I remember that time very well. And I'm so happy that, in retrospect, things are better, and you don't have any resentments towards your children as a result.
...essentially undermining our work until we appeared incompetent.
"Ms K is nice when you're in the room, but not nice when you're not." (Speaking of the principal himself....
And he thinks this is not undermining me! Ay!
Thank you for your wonderful prayers.
I sincerely hope Trevor can get past all this and find his way home.
Anna, thanks too for your prayers. And I agree, BigSis has wonderful examples of recovery. What was; what changed and how it is now. She's a shining example of recovery.
And now, I'm seeing how depressed I am getting. It's almost 2:30 in the afternoon, and I'm still in my pjs. I've accomplished nothing all day, though I have to write up the grievance and correct papers. *sigh*
Gotta get going!
Shalom!
Member
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Salisbury Wiltshire
Posts: 1,904
Hey Teach! LOL Im so glad that you troll about in your PJ's after noon!!!
It will be alright...it willl!!!
I am still sending you love across the pond! and thinking of you!
catch you soon love purrdyxxx
It will be alright...it willl!!!
I am still sending you love across the pond! and thinking of you!
catch you soon love purrdyxxx
To Life!
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: Rhode Island
Posts: 9,293
((Purrdy))
Thanks for your loving thoughtfullness.
Well, things continue at work, on a downhill slide. Yesterday, more kids were taken out of my class; there's now kids I've NEVER had a problem with all year. Yet, they are in the so called "dean's" office during my class period, missing their lessons.
I am seriously considering charging the principal and dean with malfaence of duty. Their absenses are causing them to fail. Yet, the dean, with the principal's approval apparently, are allowing them to fail! When I told my union rep, she advised me to tell the union office downtown; those who are handling my grievance.
Another student came up to me yesterday. She asked me how I was, saying she's hearing terrible things about me. This beautiful child of G*D actually told me to pay it no mind; and what she does when she's being wronged! She's going into the ministry next year at college. I think she's going to be wonderful!
Oh, and that reminds me, lol! One day last week, a kid told this "dean" that she was in my advisory. This was the day my Jr Class has their bake sales. I was busy as all, since on the Wednesday bake sale day, I have NO free time at all; it's during lunchtime; I give up my lunch to help the kids make money for activities. Anyway, the dean called out to me to get my advissee. She was clearly angry. I looked and informed her she wasn't in my advisory class. So, here's a CLEAR case of a kid lying, and dean just accepting it, without checking, and going after me. Jackass!!!
I was called into another "impromptu" meeting with an angry parent again. Seems to be daily now. ANd the principal is taking notes during these exchanges. I required union representation. Once the parent was informed of the fact, clear in my record book, she calmed down.
This senerio is becoming a pattern. The kids know they can say whatever they want against me. I've NEVER been treated like this in my career. There's something very,very wrong in this place. (Twilight Zone music begins here.)
And a math teacher asked me how I was doing. He pumped me about the phone calls to my last principal. I told him the principal and the dean, (who's supposed to be such good friends with my old principal), got no information; that he said to my landlord the dean is manipulating the principal, and he's too weak by allowing it. Anyway, I later found out that he's easily manipulated by the dean. So, it seems as if this dean is fishing for everything in every pond.
It dawns on me that if the "dean" and principal did their job as well as they search for nonexistent problems with the staff, the school might actually function well. Shame on them. :nono:
Thanks again for listening. This is like a journal for me, now; a running commentary of what's so obviously wrong with this hell hole I'm stuck in. :>(
SHalom!
Thanks for your loving thoughtfullness.
Well, things continue at work, on a downhill slide. Yesterday, more kids were taken out of my class; there's now kids I've NEVER had a problem with all year. Yet, they are in the so called "dean's" office during my class period, missing their lessons.
I am seriously considering charging the principal and dean with malfaence of duty. Their absenses are causing them to fail. Yet, the dean, with the principal's approval apparently, are allowing them to fail! When I told my union rep, she advised me to tell the union office downtown; those who are handling my grievance.
Another student came up to me yesterday. She asked me how I was, saying she's hearing terrible things about me. This beautiful child of G*D actually told me to pay it no mind; and what she does when she's being wronged! She's going into the ministry next year at college. I think she's going to be wonderful!
Oh, and that reminds me, lol! One day last week, a kid told this "dean" that she was in my advisory. This was the day my Jr Class has their bake sales. I was busy as all, since on the Wednesday bake sale day, I have NO free time at all; it's during lunchtime; I give up my lunch to help the kids make money for activities. Anyway, the dean called out to me to get my advissee. She was clearly angry. I looked and informed her she wasn't in my advisory class. So, here's a CLEAR case of a kid lying, and dean just accepting it, without checking, and going after me. Jackass!!!
I was called into another "impromptu" meeting with an angry parent again. Seems to be daily now. ANd the principal is taking notes during these exchanges. I required union representation. Once the parent was informed of the fact, clear in my record book, she calmed down.
This senerio is becoming a pattern. The kids know they can say whatever they want against me. I've NEVER been treated like this in my career. There's something very,very wrong in this place. (Twilight Zone music begins here.)
And a math teacher asked me how I was doing. He pumped me about the phone calls to my last principal. I told him the principal and the dean, (who's supposed to be such good friends with my old principal), got no information; that he said to my landlord the dean is manipulating the principal, and he's too weak by allowing it. Anyway, I later found out that he's easily manipulated by the dean. So, it seems as if this dean is fishing for everything in every pond.
It dawns on me that if the "dean" and principal did their job as well as they search for nonexistent problems with the staff, the school might actually function well. Shame on them. :nono:
Thanks again for listening. This is like a journal for me, now; a running commentary of what's so obviously wrong with this hell hole I'm stuck in. :>(
SHalom!
No More Mrs. Nice Guy
Join Date: Aug 2002
Location: Iowa
Posts: 724
(( teach ))
Keep on using your tools - you know how to detach, to focus on the things you can control and to let go of those things over which you are powerless.
You may need to take the emergency recovery tools as well - the skillet, a big bag of jujubees, steel toed bunny slippers AND muck boots.
Know that we are here for you, a safe place to vent and get centered again.
Another day, another hug.
Barb
Keep on using your tools - you know how to detach, to focus on the things you can control and to let go of those things over which you are powerless.
You may need to take the emergency recovery tools as well - the skillet, a big bag of jujubees, steel toed bunny slippers AND muck boots.
Know that we are here for you, a safe place to vent and get centered again.
Another day, another hug.
Barb
Member
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: western canada
Posts: 1,441
Teach...
Those kids are well aware of the dysfunction at the school... and the smart little ***** are using it to create more chaos...
.. cause... it's more than likely that at this point in their life... they could care if they graduated or not... and their using the situation to create excitment and drama in their lives... and the people that are supposed to be up on this crap and able to regulate it and look beyond it to uphold the principles that are going to better these kids...
well...
their just being taken for the fools they are...
man.. the kids must be killing themselves...
"look at the teachers go.. hehehehe..."
And then their parents get involved cause of course their worried about their little darlings...
lol
freakin side show...
Teach.. don't know how you've done it these last years...
but.. I gotta tell ya....
your one heck of a woman.. ;o)
you stay strong...
and I vicariously love to hear about your trials with those posers...
.. sorry.. ;o)
cause I know you gotta go through it...
but..it's only up from here.. ;o)
Be well gurl..
your in my thoughts and prayers
Those kids are well aware of the dysfunction at the school... and the smart little ***** are using it to create more chaos...
.. cause... it's more than likely that at this point in their life... they could care if they graduated or not... and their using the situation to create excitment and drama in their lives... and the people that are supposed to be up on this crap and able to regulate it and look beyond it to uphold the principles that are going to better these kids...
well...
their just being taken for the fools they are...
man.. the kids must be killing themselves...
"look at the teachers go.. hehehehe..."
And then their parents get involved cause of course their worried about their little darlings...
lol
freakin side show...
Teach.. don't know how you've done it these last years...
but.. I gotta tell ya....
your one heck of a woman.. ;o)
you stay strong...
and I vicariously love to hear about your trials with those posers...
.. sorry.. ;o)
cause I know you gotta go through it...
but..it's only up from here.. ;o)
Be well gurl..
your in my thoughts and prayers
Member
Join Date: Nov 2002
Location: Bristol TN/VA
Posts: 12,431
Coming in late. Sometimes I am just so ashamed of people, I wonder how they can be the gifts of creation with all the powers of humanity. Some of those people that run our educational systems, our justice systems.....I don't get it. I never will.
I am so sorry you are going through all this. Who wouldn't be bone tired and stressed out? I take the trazadone for sleep too. It is also supposed to be an anti-depressant. I am afraid of the hypnotics (the new type sleep drugs). Don't know about you but with me it does interact with caffeine. And caffeine jacks up the stress level in me too.
so, the only practical tip I might have would be to look at your caffeine intake, it might be making the bad a bit harder.
You have so much backbone, always have had. In my head I hear Kenny Rogers: know when to hold 'em, when to fold 'em, when to run. So many times I have seen you fight to right wrongs when I would have been slippin' out the back Jack, make a new plan Stan...la te dah.
I sure do know what you mean about questioning what dreams and what you have based and lived your life around. I seemed to have known a whole lot more when I was younger, as I don't have a clue now.
I have had some times when I was as happy as it is possible for anyone to be, loving life. I can't explain those any better than I can explain why I just don't give a damn.
I go to work for the money.
All I know is that things are always changing. I don't know what is around the corner. So I will just keep putting one foot in front of the other until the new view is exposed. I know that life is bigger than my imagination.
I do hope you find a way to bail out on that school, no need to go down with a sinking ship. jmho.
care and concern,
live
I am so sorry you are going through all this. Who wouldn't be bone tired and stressed out? I take the trazadone for sleep too. It is also supposed to be an anti-depressant. I am afraid of the hypnotics (the new type sleep drugs). Don't know about you but with me it does interact with caffeine. And caffeine jacks up the stress level in me too.
so, the only practical tip I might have would be to look at your caffeine intake, it might be making the bad a bit harder.
You have so much backbone, always have had. In my head I hear Kenny Rogers: know when to hold 'em, when to fold 'em, when to run. So many times I have seen you fight to right wrongs when I would have been slippin' out the back Jack, make a new plan Stan...la te dah.
I sure do know what you mean about questioning what dreams and what you have based and lived your life around. I seemed to have known a whole lot more when I was younger, as I don't have a clue now.
I have had some times when I was as happy as it is possible for anyone to be, loving life. I can't explain those any better than I can explain why I just don't give a damn.
I go to work for the money.
All I know is that things are always changing. I don't know what is around the corner. So I will just keep putting one foot in front of the other until the new view is exposed. I know that life is bigger than my imagination.
I do hope you find a way to bail out on that school, no need to go down with a sinking ship. jmho.
care and concern,
live
On a tear
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: Volcano Country!
Posts: 3,221
Teach - I think Bikewench has a good point. For me, during high school, I could not with any sort of reliability, plan beyond next weekend. I could dream... but had few real life skills in application of those ideas. For me, the drama WAS life. The chaos WAS excitement. I think I was often a nasty, intractable, obnoxious girl.
... I got better, it took me longer and I had to fall harder than some of my fellow students.
What they reap will be exactly what they need to learn and grow. I am sorry you have to be a vehicle for this type of learning. And I would bet that there is more than just the ministry student who are noticing how you are reacting, what steps you are taking to protect yourself and how to live in a real world that is not kind, and certainly not like we see "on TV".
That Dean is another story – ye gads, what a piece of work! Folks like her seem to feel so diminished that they can only feel better if they can drag others down. I can pity folks like her – but only with time and from a distance. I believe you are being a better person than me… I might have looked up some of my kids’ old friends to do some “work” on her car… her windows… you know. I would have at least THOUGHT about it…
No… my recovery just isn’t that good. I have this terrible tendency to fight at the level of my enemy… down in the mud with the other pigs.
You can feel good about what you are doing. You are standing up and fighting for what is right and in the right way. You are a good example to your students.
... I got better, it took me longer and I had to fall harder than some of my fellow students.
What they reap will be exactly what they need to learn and grow. I am sorry you have to be a vehicle for this type of learning. And I would bet that there is more than just the ministry student who are noticing how you are reacting, what steps you are taking to protect yourself and how to live in a real world that is not kind, and certainly not like we see "on TV".
That Dean is another story – ye gads, what a piece of work! Folks like her seem to feel so diminished that they can only feel better if they can drag others down. I can pity folks like her – but only with time and from a distance. I believe you are being a better person than me… I might have looked up some of my kids’ old friends to do some “work” on her car… her windows… you know. I would have at least THOUGHT about it…
No… my recovery just isn’t that good. I have this terrible tendency to fight at the level of my enemy… down in the mud with the other pigs.
You can feel good about what you are doing. You are standing up and fighting for what is right and in the right way. You are a good example to your students.
To Life!
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: Rhode Island
Posts: 9,293
Thank you all....
I agree with Bike and BigSis about the drama with the kiddies. That's normal, for alot of kiddies in HS. What's NOT normal is for the adults to act the same as the teen agers!:
Barb;
I need this place so much for my own serenity right now. It's the only "normal" part of my life right now!!! Son wants to get paroled, and without treatment for his liver and kidney, it's only bad news. Work is crazy. So, SR is really a life saver for me right now.
Thank you... :>)
Bike;
Man, that made me laugh for sure! 
And the rest was so nice. Thank you... :>)
Live;
I am very conservative with my caffine intake already. The equilivant of two cups a day normally. Within my doc's requirements, anyway.
Love the mixed song metaphore. :>)
That, and the fact that things are always changing, I can definately relate to.
Thanks for the care... :>)
BigSis;
Thanks for saying I'm a model for my students! I honestly DO try to be. And I know there are others who feel the same way as my ministry student....
One kid told me today that there are going to be lots of meetings with parents. He was involved in one, and was not aware I didn't know about it. Oh, and the new dean; the one I thought was decent? Well, he held that meeting without my knowledge.
Another kid, normally a school PIA, helped me open a window in the lounge; I couldn't reach it. That's the norm for kids who knows something's wrong. They do nice things for you; many do not have the language skills to verbalize what they're thinking. Especially in an inner city.
On the advice of my union rep, I wrote a letter to the principal. I'll post it on the next post. This one's long enough.
I've also been advised to contact a lawyer. Union rep said something's going down, and it's not good. This is the one the principal wanted to change the kid's schedule, so that I couldn't file a grievance. That sure tells you he know's what he's doing is wrong, doesn't it? I'm waiting to get a recomendation from my union office for that one.
Finally, I may press harrassment charges and malfaence of duty charges with human resources. I'm awaiting my unions advice on that.
Anyway, thanks for listening, and for caring and all the beautiful support you've given me. I appreciate it so very much!
Shalom!
I agree with Bike and BigSis about the drama with the kiddies. That's normal, for alot of kiddies in HS. What's NOT normal is for the adults to act the same as the teen agers!
:Barb;
I need this place so much for my own serenity right now. It's the only "normal" part of my life right now!!! Son wants to get paroled, and without treatment for his liver and kidney, it's only bad news. Work is crazy. So, SR is really a life saver for me right now.
Thank you... :>)
Bike;
...and I vicariously love to hear about your trials with those posers...
And the rest was so nice. Thank you... :>)
Live;
I am very conservative with my caffine intake already. The equilivant of two cups a day normally. Within my doc's requirements, anyway.
Love the mixed song metaphore. :>)
I seemed to have known a whole lot more when I was younger, as I don't have a clue now.
Thanks for the care... :>)
BigSis;
Thanks for saying I'm a model for my students! I honestly DO try to be. And I know there are others who feel the same way as my ministry student....
One kid told me today that there are going to be lots of meetings with parents. He was involved in one, and was not aware I didn't know about it. Oh, and the new dean; the one I thought was decent? Well, he held that meeting without my knowledge.
Another kid, normally a school PIA, helped me open a window in the lounge; I couldn't reach it. That's the norm for kids who knows something's wrong. They do nice things for you; many do not have the language skills to verbalize what they're thinking. Especially in an inner city.
On the advice of my union rep, I wrote a letter to the principal. I'll post it on the next post. This one's long enough.
I've also been advised to contact a lawyer. Union rep said something's going down, and it's not good. This is the one the principal wanted to change the kid's schedule, so that I couldn't file a grievance. That sure tells you he know's what he's doing is wrong, doesn't it? I'm waiting to get a recomendation from my union office for that one.
Finally, I may press harrassment charges and malfaence of duty charges with human resources. I'm awaiting my unions advice on that.
Anyway, thanks for listening, and for caring and all the beautiful support you've given me. I appreciate it so very much!
Shalom!
To Life!
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: Rhode Island
Posts: 9,293
Here's the letter I will send to the principal, once I get the ok from my union office. The building rep is at a meeting tonight, and is going to talk to the bigwigs. The mayor will be at that meeting too. Too bad I didn't know.... 
13 March 2006
Dr D S; (Initials to protect his identity, though I'm not sure why...)
I would prefer all communication be on paper between us. It is clear you are setting up something; holding meetings with my students, allowing them to cut class, and holding meetings with my student’s parents all without my knowledge. This behavior is clearly inappropriate and unprofessional. Consequently, you have shown me that the two of us cannot talk; that there is some kind of agenda being plotted by you, with help from other administrators.
First issue to discuss is the fact that two of my students cut class on the day of a test. One, M N, stated to me that she came in late, and would be in to take the test. She did not come; nor has she come since. The other student is S O.
The discipline slip, which came back 11 days after the write up, said to see you about these two students. If you can possibly justify these students, and others, being out of my class without permission AGAIN, please inform me. I find it reprehensible that I have not been informed as to why they are out of my class; nor have I been asked anything concerning their behavior.
The handwritten note I gave you on these students before was hand written for a reason. It was handwritten because I did not choose to make it public or permanent. And I wanted you to know that they had NOT completed the agreed upon make up work for the 5 weeks they were out of class before – again, without my permission or consent. They were given a weekend for the two short assignments, plenty of time. Two weeks later, they still had not done the assignments, nor consulted with me for anything. Consequently, they failed the quarter. There was, however, still opportunity for these children to pass, if they started doing their work.
My students clearly cannot do their work if they are not in class. Why are you keeping my students out of my class? Why are you causing them to fail?
Why are other students being taken from my class? Why are you having meetings with student and their parents without me being present. As you have seen with two previous meetings, P P and A D, the students do present inaccurate information to their parents. Both parents ended up chastising their children for that behavior. So now, I’m not being given the opportunity to defend myself against these charges. Why is this opportunity not being given to me? You are dealing with my professional reputation.
It is clear that you are creating a hostile environment in which I have to work. And the consistent lack of support is creating MORE problems for me with my students. You are, indeed, the cause of the problem. So, I am clearly asking you to begin supporting me as the professional that I am.
If you have a complaint against me, say so now. Otherwise I expect you to do your job. Support the teachers, including me; make sure the students are in class, or at least charge your administration to do so; and discipline students who misbehave. Frankly, I don’t understand why I have to ask you this.
Sincerely,
"historyteach"
Whatdayathink?
Oh, and I now have kids making prank phone calls to my room. They have to call from another school phone. And kids banging on my walls. All during my class instruction. But, Dr D S doesn't think his lack of support creates a problem. Oy! Clear case of the peter principle; people rise to the level of their incompetence. Well, he's surely there!
A reading writing specialist who's been meeting with the 9th grade team, me included, was due to come in today. He was in school, but, didn't come. He was in conference with Dr D S this morning though...
Another girl, with whom I had a problem a few weeks ago, came in with her dad Friday for a meeting. I didn't go, as it was during class time. But, she told me why dad came in; because I disciplined her, gave her a detention, for being in the bathroom over 1/2 hour during class....
This entire school is indeed dysfunctional! And it's the lack of leadership that's the cause. Another teacher told me that the principal said to her that the other teacher, with two years, was going to get the job -- before the interview! Yea, dysfunctional is perhaps too mild a word.
Thanks again....
Shalom!
Shalom!
13 March 2006
Dr D S; (Initials to protect his identity, though I'm not sure why...)
I would prefer all communication be on paper between us. It is clear you are setting up something; holding meetings with my students, allowing them to cut class, and holding meetings with my student’s parents all without my knowledge. This behavior is clearly inappropriate and unprofessional. Consequently, you have shown me that the two of us cannot talk; that there is some kind of agenda being plotted by you, with help from other administrators.
First issue to discuss is the fact that two of my students cut class on the day of a test. One, M N, stated to me that she came in late, and would be in to take the test. She did not come; nor has she come since. The other student is S O.
The discipline slip, which came back 11 days after the write up, said to see you about these two students. If you can possibly justify these students, and others, being out of my class without permission AGAIN, please inform me. I find it reprehensible that I have not been informed as to why they are out of my class; nor have I been asked anything concerning their behavior.
The handwritten note I gave you on these students before was hand written for a reason. It was handwritten because I did not choose to make it public or permanent. And I wanted you to know that they had NOT completed the agreed upon make up work for the 5 weeks they were out of class before – again, without my permission or consent. They were given a weekend for the two short assignments, plenty of time. Two weeks later, they still had not done the assignments, nor consulted with me for anything. Consequently, they failed the quarter. There was, however, still opportunity for these children to pass, if they started doing their work.
My students clearly cannot do their work if they are not in class. Why are you keeping my students out of my class? Why are you causing them to fail?
Why are other students being taken from my class? Why are you having meetings with student and their parents without me being present. As you have seen with two previous meetings, P P and A D, the students do present inaccurate information to their parents. Both parents ended up chastising their children for that behavior. So now, I’m not being given the opportunity to defend myself against these charges. Why is this opportunity not being given to me? You are dealing with my professional reputation.
It is clear that you are creating a hostile environment in which I have to work. And the consistent lack of support is creating MORE problems for me with my students. You are, indeed, the cause of the problem. So, I am clearly asking you to begin supporting me as the professional that I am.
If you have a complaint against me, say so now. Otherwise I expect you to do your job. Support the teachers, including me; make sure the students are in class, or at least charge your administration to do so; and discipline students who misbehave. Frankly, I don’t understand why I have to ask you this.
Sincerely,
"historyteach"
Whatdayathink?
Oh, and I now have kids making prank phone calls to my room. They have to call from another school phone. And kids banging on my walls. All during my class instruction. But, Dr D S doesn't think his lack of support creates a problem. Oy! Clear case of the peter principle; people rise to the level of their incompetence. Well, he's surely there!
A reading writing specialist who's been meeting with the 9th grade team, me included, was due to come in today. He was in school, but, didn't come. He was in conference with Dr D S this morning though...
Another girl, with whom I had a problem a few weeks ago, came in with her dad Friday for a meeting. I didn't go, as it was during class time. But, she told me why dad came in; because I disciplined her, gave her a detention, for being in the bathroom over 1/2 hour during class....
This entire school is indeed dysfunctional! And it's the lack of leadership that's the cause. Another teacher told me that the principal said to her that the other teacher, with two years, was going to get the job -- before the interview! Yea, dysfunctional is perhaps too mild a word.
Thanks again....
Shalom!
Shalom!
Member
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: western canada
Posts: 1,441
Teach...
give me that yerks number....
I wanna give him a call....;o)
lol...
"umm yeah....
This is bikewench from western Canada... and ahhhhhh..... your messing with our friend Teach... and ahhhhh... I'm here to tell ya.. it's gotta stop... or your gonna have a bunch of po'd addicts and codies coming to get medieval on your heiney...."
hehehe
Honestly Teach...
Can't believe those are the conditions you have to work under...
It's one thing if things are above board all the way.... but.. this is sooo smelly... that it makes me think of fish.
I'd really love to give those pipple a word or two.. cause it's really hard for me to stand by and see crap like that go down...
it offends my offender thing inside me...
The letter is dead on...
lays the whole thing out...
puts the onus where it belongs... ;o)
I pray this is over for you soon...
give me that yerks number....
I wanna give him a call....;o)
lol...
"umm yeah....
This is bikewench from western Canada... and ahhhhhh..... your messing with our friend Teach... and ahhhhh... I'm here to tell ya.. it's gotta stop... or your gonna have a bunch of po'd addicts and codies coming to get medieval on your heiney...."
hehehe
Honestly Teach...
Can't believe those are the conditions you have to work under...
It's one thing if things are above board all the way.... but.. this is sooo smelly... that it makes me think of fish.
I'd really love to give those pipple a word or two.. cause it's really hard for me to stand by and see crap like that go down...
it offends my offender thing inside me...
The letter is dead on...
lays the whole thing out...
puts the onus where it belongs... ;o)
I pray this is over for you soon...
Reach Out and Touch Faith
Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: On a Sailboat
Posts: 3,871
This is Alera from sunny california, and you are messing with my friend, teach. You lay off her or we are driving the codie and newbie busses right up to your office.
Never heard of those buses before? You will wish you had your act together long ago!
Never heard of those buses before? You will wish you had your act together long ago!
:To Life!
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: Rhode Island
Posts: 9,293
Oh, you guys make me laugh so hard!!! :>)
There were 2 kids in the class with the golden girls today. TWO. OY!
Nice and easy afternoon, hehehe... :>)
Oh, and in the afternoon, when it was time to leave, the other teacher was there at the school. Yea, the one with two years experience; that got the job I interviewed for even before the interview took place; in school, sitting in the hallway, waiting to see the dean...
Makes me want to puke!!!
The english teacher told me a nice story, though. The principal went to see her about this problem yesterday. She told him everyone is watching what's happening, and that everyone of the staff is very aware if it happens to me, it can happen to them. And that it's wrong. She also told him to kick dean to the curb. LOL!
He said if anything goes wrong, the business supporters will leave and the school will close.
He's willing to let the school CLOSE than to drop this foolish vendetta. I thought it was bad enough that he's willing to let these kids fail. Now, he's willing to let the SCHOOL close!!! He's a very, very, sick puppy!!!
She let him know that there's always more businessmen to invest in the school, and that it won't be closing due to him, LOL!
What a jackass!!!
And to put the topping on the cake, here's how well fate is treating me right now. I got a speeding ticket a while ago. I went to court and since I haven't had a ticket in over three years, I was allowed to pay $25 court costs; that way, it won't hurt my insurance too.
Well, today, I got a letter from the court, saying I didn't show up!
I payed by CHECK! There's a paper trail.
But, they gave me a $100 fine and suspended liscense. I'm supposed to hand it in within a short period of time. Grrrrrr.... One more thing to fight.
Why can't I get a break.... :>(
Yea, I'm on the pity pot.
Thanks everyone. I'm so glad I have this place to talk.
Shalom!
Member
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Salisbury Wiltshire
Posts: 1,904
OHHHH History!!! this is almost too much!!!!!!
you are not on the pity pot my love! you really do have some crap to deal with....its waht one of my favourite authors reffers to self made 'junk bombs'!LOL not much help when you are in the thick of negative people, thoughts and feelings this is a result of that!!!
You are however keeping a level head, you are seeing the situations for what they are and it may even cause you more pain! But you are still communicating....
I have seen more and more people come on here with really similar experiences! that is so wierd! or is it just that what we focus on we get?
Just a suggestion but in your shoes would you not be better off finding somewhere else to work? You know I have seen this in my last work place....one person there for millions of years literally control freakin their way through the school using bullying tactics and causing misery wherever they go, twisitng the knife with a smile on thier face!!!!
The fight you are putting up will be worth it I guess but what is it doing for you right now?
I worry so because this sort of thing can leave you feeling exhausted and resentful, battered and bruised and it takes a long time to recover.....I know that from bitter experience....
Are these people worth 'fighting'? is your position worth fighting for? only you can answert that but I think personally that you are worth so much more!!!SO MUCH MORE!
The junk bombs come as a result of negativity in your life...its self perpetuating....If you are feeling ok then things are ok but if you are swamped in all that crap then more crap comes your way!!!! attract likes attract.......honestly you may think im mad but I know this from experience too!!!
history I hope that you are feeling strong, I hope that they do not bring you to your knees like my place did me....my instincts were screaming at me to get out of that place a year ago...I ignored it and to my peril I suffered...
time to ask yourself is it worth it?
What are your instincts telling you right now?
The book I refer to is LYNNE GRABHORN-EXCUSE ME YOUR LIFE IS WAITING...its a book and audio, its well worth getting it had a life changing impact on me...just a suggestion....
history I think about you everyday you know? I keep hoping and praying that this will have a positive ending for your sake!
life is short too short for spending any more time in the presence of arseholes than you need to! LOL AND that comes from experience too!!!!LOL
love and prayers my friend
Purrdyxxxxx
you are not on the pity pot my love! you really do have some crap to deal with....its waht one of my favourite authors reffers to self made 'junk bombs'!LOL not much help when you are in the thick of negative people, thoughts and feelings this is a result of that!!!
You are however keeping a level head, you are seeing the situations for what they are and it may even cause you more pain! But you are still communicating....
I have seen more and more people come on here with really similar experiences! that is so wierd! or is it just that what we focus on we get?
Just a suggestion but in your shoes would you not be better off finding somewhere else to work? You know I have seen this in my last work place....one person there for millions of years literally control freakin their way through the school using bullying tactics and causing misery wherever they go, twisitng the knife with a smile on thier face!!!!
The fight you are putting up will be worth it I guess but what is it doing for you right now?
I worry so because this sort of thing can leave you feeling exhausted and resentful, battered and bruised and it takes a long time to recover.....I know that from bitter experience....
Are these people worth 'fighting'? is your position worth fighting for? only you can answert that but I think personally that you are worth so much more!!!SO MUCH MORE!
The junk bombs come as a result of negativity in your life...its self perpetuating....If you are feeling ok then things are ok but if you are swamped in all that crap then more crap comes your way!!!! attract likes attract.......honestly you may think im mad but I know this from experience too!!!
history I hope that you are feeling strong, I hope that they do not bring you to your knees like my place did me....my instincts were screaming at me to get out of that place a year ago...I ignored it and to my peril I suffered...
time to ask yourself is it worth it?
What are your instincts telling you right now?
The book I refer to is LYNNE GRABHORN-EXCUSE ME YOUR LIFE IS WAITING...its a book and audio, its well worth getting it had a life changing impact on me...just a suggestion....
history I think about you everyday you know? I keep hoping and praying that this will have a positive ending for your sake!
life is short too short for spending any more time in the presence of arseholes than you need to! LOL AND that comes from experience too!!!!LOL
love and prayers my friend
Purrdyxxxxx
Member
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: western canada
Posts: 1,441
Why can't I get a break.... :>(
Yea, I'm on the pity pot.
Yea, I'm on the pity pot.
hehehe...
Teach.. ;o)
Each little thing that comes back to bite me is a tap on the head from God I believe.. ;o)
It's like he's saying...
"slow down gurl.. your moving tooooo fast... "
At one point in my life... I realized I had more life in my life than I could possibly cope with...
and I just kept piling more on...
Things kept getting lost and misplaced along the way.... and I felt my life was... unmanageable.. lol
Of course... I had a bagful of stuff I was hanging onto... and a lot of it was pastlife crap...
But.. day by day.. I kept on ...
Fix this .. fix that...
let go let go let go...
Slowly getting time in the drivers seat of my bus...
Getting my passengers organized.. lol....
And God in the seat beside.. or behind me...
always...
Life is a happening Teach...
We can choose to let it impact us... and let it hurt to learn...
... cause no one gets outa here alive.. ;o)
Just one day at a time... the best you can...
To Life!
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: Rhode Island
Posts: 9,293
Hey, folks;
Sorry I've been away for a bit. I've been going through old posts to get evidence for my grievance against the school's admin. And I've gotten ALOT!
I'm told that journals are some of the best evidence! LOL!
I sponsored the Jr Class dance on Friday night. We made over $400 for the class. The principal crossed off "JR Class" from the dance anouncements! Can you believe such pettiness? OMG! What a shmuck! Of course, he knows the grievance is coming down the road, I'm certain. It's too small of a school for them NOT to know. And one teach is a snitch, I'm told.:
I had to deal with the two deans during the evening. They didn't come until late though, thankfully. ANd two other teachers were there; one being the union rep.
Of course, I was set up again. During the day the janitor asked female dean if he was to stay for the dance and clean up. It's an extra $100 for him. Dean told him the dance was MY doing; he should ask me. She never said a word to me about it, and of course, I have NO authority to write a check. So, either way, I'd be wrong; if I kept him, I had no authority to pay him; if I didn't, the floor remains dirty for someone else to clean the next day. It remained dirty. I figure it's better than authorizing a pay I have no authority for. And I'm sure I can fully justify that when the shyte hits the fan, as I'm sure it will.
Purrdy;
Thanks for the good thoughts. And I agree, like attracks like. That's why I try to do nice things for myself. To remind me of the good.
And I can't get another job until anohter position opens. I'm stuck there. And they want their golden girl in the position. That's why they're going after me. Jerks!
But, then again, that's why I'm hitting them with a grievance. And I doubt the principal will be there next year. Not when the school hears about his behaviors. Hopefull the dean won't either, but, she's not admin, so it will take some work to get her out. The rest of the staff see all of this clearly. I'm not alone. I've lots of support. :>)
And I thank you so much for your loving support too!
Bike;
I honestly don't think I'm bringing this on myself. I'm under attack. If I do nothing, my professional reputation will be ruined. I MUST fight this behavior to save the ability I have to make a living. Believe me, RI is a VERY small state. It matters.
And in the interum, I'm trying hard to take care of me. One day at a time. It's all I can do, with what I must do. Hope that makes sense...
Shalom!
Sorry I've been away for a bit. I've been going through old posts to get evidence for my grievance against the school's admin. And I've gotten ALOT!
I'm told that journals are some of the best evidence! LOL!
I sponsored the Jr Class dance on Friday night. We made over $400 for the class. The principal crossed off "JR Class" from the dance anouncements! Can you believe such pettiness? OMG! What a shmuck! Of course, he knows the grievance is coming down the road, I'm certain. It's too small of a school for them NOT to know. And one teach is a snitch, I'm told.
:I had to deal with the two deans during the evening. They didn't come until late though, thankfully. ANd two other teachers were there; one being the union rep.
Of course, I was set up again. During the day the janitor asked female dean if he was to stay for the dance and clean up. It's an extra $100 for him. Dean told him the dance was MY doing; he should ask me. She never said a word to me about it, and of course, I have NO authority to write a check. So, either way, I'd be wrong; if I kept him, I had no authority to pay him; if I didn't, the floor remains dirty for someone else to clean the next day. It remained dirty. I figure it's better than authorizing a pay I have no authority for. And I'm sure I can fully justify that when the shyte hits the fan, as I'm sure it will.
Purrdy;
Thanks for the good thoughts. And I agree, like attracks like. That's why I try to do nice things for myself. To remind me of the good.
And I can't get another job until anohter position opens. I'm stuck there. And they want their golden girl in the position. That's why they're going after me. Jerks!
But, then again, that's why I'm hitting them with a grievance. And I doubt the principal will be there next year. Not when the school hears about his behaviors. Hopefull the dean won't either, but, she's not admin, so it will take some work to get her out. The rest of the staff see all of this clearly. I'm not alone. I've lots of support. :>)
And I thank you so much for your loving support too!
Bike;
I honestly don't think I'm bringing this on myself. I'm under attack. If I do nothing, my professional reputation will be ruined. I MUST fight this behavior to save the ability I have to make a living. Believe me, RI is a VERY small state. It matters.
And in the interum, I'm trying hard to take care of me. One day at a time. It's all I can do, with what I must do. Hope that makes sense...
Shalom!
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