suicide
 

My husband thinks there nothing wrong ... am in the bed room and my husband is in the living room playing his games , talking to a friend on x box .

I dont want to say anything and spoil his happy mood and his fun

I'll be fine just my mind is ****** at the moment and its thinking a way of me dying
I have my 16 year old niece and her boyfriend here but there still sleeping

i cant even slit my wrists right ...i dont cut deep enough and there is the pain as well.

I cant OD because my husband now has all the pills some where else were i cant get them

what other options do i have ?
nothing i can do with out my husband noticing am doing something
Maybe i can walk out the house go to the train station and jump the lines
I dream about doing that at night my voices tell me to go and do it
I can hear the trains the noise of them going over the tracks
I will just lay there ready for death to come

He would notice me leave ...come after me ...tell me to come home

I should get ready to go ... maybe he wont notice this time:a108:

Don't do it. Please talk to your husband or at least the suicide hotline in your area.

Decide to Live

Please read the PMs I sent you Willow.

And please do let someone know how you feel - right away - whether it's someone in the house, or the local doctor or hospital, or your mum or whoever it is you usually talk to when you feel like this.

D

told my husband ... going to call a helpline