withdrawing from the outside world
 

That's what I did for the longest time.... Just scared of meeting people and broaden my horizons. Really, wished I wasn't so scared being 30 yrs. old and feel like I'm much younger than that. I lost my virginity to a guy over a drunken night then the frriendahip with him went downhill after that. Afterwards got into a short-term fling with a guy that I was friends with for a few years now doesnt want anything to do with me anymore.

To top it off, I can't hear well, even with the highest powered hearing aids so I feel awkward when communicating with others like I just don't fit in.

I go to this small-town bar frequently because I run into people there I've seen before. I like being around people that drink...Wierd, I know. I like being around people that joke around and have fun.

I love being around men now...Like it's some sort of drug....I don't have any close friends....I swore to myself that I won't get involved with a guy sexually now unless there's a relationship involved.