my story
 

i was in 10th grade when my granpa died. that summe ri had not been the best person to him, he went back down to florida and had a heart attack. he survived that only to die of sepis a few weeks later. i blamed myself for it and i got very depressed. i tried to kill myself a few times. thigns were going better, but then my friends and an ex boyfriend of mine started to treat me bad. i started to get more depressed but thanks to a friend i am on my way up. i still get down when things get rough and lately with ym cousin i've found myself bottleing things up. i dunno if it is b/c i am getting depressed again or if i am just scared to tell people how i feel for fear of them worrying.

Trish,

I see you all over the place in just 12 posts. Reaching, reaching, reaching. Well, now _I_ finally spotted you. (And I know you're all over because I just did a profile search, hope you don't mind. :))

And this --> ((this)) <-- is a hug in case you didn't know. I like this one best tho: :hug: That's for you. And so is this ((((trishie)))) And Happy Halloween and stuff.

The best that I can glean is that you suffer from depression (intermittant and situational), being the loved one of an addict (your cousin), and I guess you have had some sort of eating disorder?

I'll check again, but right now the biggest hindrance I see to your truly getting better is a reticence to share with others. You MUST talk, Trish. You've got to go to the right people (ppl who are well and sober and blah blah blah - you get the idea) and spill.

This is a good start though, sharing on SR.

You worry is aimed in the wrong direction. You can't do that, ok? You've got to practice puting you first.

TenChips

Thanks. life right now is just throwing me so much. I don't know anymore what to do.