Free2bme888

Wonderful! 5 weeks is GREAT🎏🎉🪅🎊

Canadian Koala

Congrats on 5 weeks Ronantian!

You talk less about anxiety, I guess it has taken on manageable proportions compared to day one?

Keep the good work ☼

Ronantian

Yes CK, it’s much easier to manage now that I’m not getting high to avoid feeling any anxiety. Sleeping much better too and have far more energy during the day.

FlyingDutchMan

Times flies when you don’t check in regularly. Congratulations on the sober time! Sounds like you are improving on all levels and that in turn makes it easier to stay sober. Hope you can string together many more sober days.

Ronantian

Thanks FDM, over 6 weeks now. Glad you’ve been able to keep it to the weekends, something I could never do.

Dee74

How are things Ronantian?

D

Ronantian

Doing well Dee. Close to two months now and doing better than I have been in years.

Dee74

That’s awesome Ronantian - congratulations!

D

Ronantian

2 months sober.

Anxiety has spiked over the past few days. My partner was supposed to be having her gallbladder removed, but it has been postponed because her blood results read abnormal liver activity. Doctor said it’s either inflamed or stone in bile duct. She has to do more tests. That alongside the uncertainty surrounding the new covid variant have really triggered me. No desire to start using again, but feeling really anxious.

biminiblue

Aw, Ronantian. I hope your partner gets her medical issues sorted.

I follow This Week in Virology (TWiV) podcast. These doctors, scientists, and professors do virology and immunology for a living and they say not to worry about the variants if you're fully vaccinated...they also suggest not listening to the 10 seconds of fear-selling on the news without knowing all the facts.

I try to stay off social media like facebook, too.

Well done on your continued sober time.

Free2bme888

I echo Bim, just caught up on the thread.

FlyingDutchMan

Hope the anxiety dies down real quickly. It’s a good thing you are not smoking. I don’t think it would’ve helped.

Dee74

Yeah smoking wouldn’t help. Hope your partners surgery can go ahead soon.

We’ll know soon enough from real evidence rather than speculation if this variant is something to worry about. Til then I’d hold my faith in the jabs we’ve already had

D

Ronantian

Thanks Dee, uncertainty is really hard for me. Just terrified that the vaccines will be ineffective.

Ronantian

Still really anxious. Have gone on sick leave from work, just wasn’t in the headspace to do it. Hoping that the break will help me come to terms with the pandemic again. Just find it really scary.

I’m glad I haven’t been using, think it would make things harder.

FlyingDutchMan

Would it be helpful to completely write out what it is exactly you are fearing? I have no problems with anxiety myself but my girlfriend does and she’s had help with it. One of the exercises was completely dissecting what steps you make in your head that lead to this all-consuming feeling of fear.

If you don’t feel comfortable with it, please don’t. I am by no means a therapist of qualified to give advice, but I underwrite the fact that we make a lot of subconscious steps in our mind that lead to a certain end result.

Whatever you do, I hope you’ll do better in the near future. I am at home with COVID myself now and for me it turns out as a mild cold. Having the kids at home while trying to work is more inconvenient than the effects of the infection. I am vaccinated twice though. It doesn’t guarantee anything but maybe it makes you feel a little better. I post this with the best intentions.

All my best Ronantian, let’s not forget you are not smoking now and that’s worth a big compliment from my side.

Ronantian

Thank you FDM.

I am vaccinated twice too, and it’s a relief that you’re only experiencing mild symptoms. My worry is that I’ll get a bad case. I’m relatively young and have no underlying health issues, so know that I’m unlikely to have a severe case. But in my head it’s always worst case scenario.

Can you let me know what your symptoms are like? I think it might be reassuring to see how it actually effects people.

FlyingDutchMan

Sure thing, I’m glad to. And you wanna know how I got infected? I asked my daughter (8 years old) to sit on my lap and cough in my face a couple of times, after she tested positive. I wanted to get it over with. She loved it, we had a lot of fun doing that. Well, it worked for sure!

On Tuesday I started getting a very mild headache as well, mostly noticeable when I moved my head from side to side rapidly. After almost two days the headache went away and now I have a mild cold. My nose is a little runny, I sneeze a couple of times a day but it’s really nothing compared to the cold I normally catch once a year. Today my muscles in the neck got the tiniest bit sore, but that’s about it until this point. I’d call it a slight annoyance.

I am a 43 year old who has smoked cigarettes since 14 and marijuana daily since I was 18, minus a couple of stints where I quit. I do cycle a lot, but I am not living the all out healthy lifestyle by a long shot.

I know I can tell you a million times that you will probably have nothing to worry about. And I truly believe that. But I know it doesn't work that way with anxiety. You have to believe it yourself.

Do you have a certain image in your head which frightens you? Is it death you fear? There’s nothing to be ashamed about, it’s irrational and you didn’t choose to feel anxious.

Hope my story brings some enlightenment, seriously. You deserve to be freed of this irrational fear!

Ronantian

Thanks FDM. That makes me feel a little bit calmer about it.

I have always had a fear of death. I’ve talked about it in counselling and think it’s related to a fear of uncertainty and not being able to control things. I think I need to remind myself that if I get covid it will most likely be mild like yours and I will be able to cope with it. I suppose we’ve been trained to fear this for two years and it’s hard to unlearn this.

Dee74

I’m sure you will be fine Ronantian

D