Didn’t make it the full weekend, but I’m back on the no cannabis mid week plan as of yesterday. I was a little nervous on Monday morning thinking last night would be super hard after using again but iv surprised myself. I’m really determined, I’ve really been sticking to journaling and self care plan in the evening which is helping keep me busy and distracted.

I noticed on Sunday morning how crap I felt actually like a kind of stone over, normally I never notice it but yeah I didn’t have the same get up and go I’ve experienced during the week off. My sleep isn’t particularly bad either without it, only noticeable thing is a slight increase in anxiety but that’s to be expected. Me and my therapist are working through that together she gave me some good techniques yesterday to try out.

Struggled abit tonight, sons away for sleepover with nana so that kind thrown me. Stayed the course, went a drive then home for a bath chamomile tea and early bed.

im working tomorrow as well, so reminding myself of how much easier I will hop out of bed fresh and focused.

I’m glad you’re fighting it lpg.

D

I MADE IT THROUGH! Yaaay I’m so proud of myself because it was tough last night. Feel quite emotional in a good way though just feel like if I really want this complete sobriety I can have it! Not jumping the gun sticking but I feel so much hope atm.

awesome :)

D

Hang in there Lpg!!

way to go!!!

Thanks everyone for the words of encouragement. Still working my plan. Last week was horrendous for me I really struggled but somehow I still manage to stick to the plan. So many opportunities I would normally have caved in but I didn’t. Even on the night my son was away.

I don’t know if anyone can relate to this but when I don’t smoke, I feel like the more time I put between me and cannabis it’s like my brain start to go 100 mph. I become forgetful, easily distracted, can’t sit at peace and worst of all short tempered & easily upset. I even took myself to a herbalist for some natural herbal remedies to help with concentration and forgetfulness, I’ve went and baught a diary. How can I possibly have a worse memory when not smoking it doesn’t make any sense!

Feel silly mentioning I got a diary I’m sure most normal grown adults keep a diary 😂 but basically what im trying to say is I’m arming myself up with whatever tools I need so my av doesn’t trick me into any BS

That 100mph feeling - I dunno if it faded or I got used to it or what. but it stopped bothering me after a month or two lpg.

D

Well that’s good to know either way I will get used to it, either that or I’ll probably forget about it soon enough at this rate 🤪

Just need to find ways to manage it and give myself time for improvements.

Hey, Lpg I call it a journal I tend to shy away from that diary word. It's got 16 year old girl written all over it.....lol
I want it to sound more like the Lewis and Clark journals of the voyage of discovery. you know??
Journals are great for looking back and seeing where you were at mentally so you can have a better picture of your patterns and actions.

I've lived with untreated ADHD pretty much all of my life.

I lived in denial of it mostly since my diagnosis as a kid.

I'm now in the process of working to re-affirm that diagnosis and look at having it treated.... the 100-mile-an-hour mind thing, forgetting things, being distracted.... that's all very consistent with ADHD and those with ADHD have a much higher propensity toward cannabis use disorder. It's frequently a self-medication.

For me, it does seem to help some of my ADHD issues..... but it also exacerbates them (forgetfulness and weed are pretty commonly paired).

Might be worth speaking with your doctor and / or psychiatrist / psychologist about assessment for ADHD and other such conditions that may be underlying your addiction.

that made me lol yes ‘dear diary’

yeah I do have a separate journal where I write down all my personal thoughts and feelings so I can track it from this. I’ll call it a planner…I got a planner for remembering day to day tasks.

hmm interesting, I know years back I did wonder about if I had adhd but I thought it was more becuase of my drinking and anxiety and as soon as I quit drinking I picked up smoking daily in the same transition so I’ve not had any real time away from substance really.

Can I give you One example of the many things iv forgotten the last two weeks, me and my partner spoke in the morning that he would finish work early to come home and spend time with us and make us dinner. I would take my son shopping and meet a friend. So we argeed i would pick up the food and meet a friend. Once I was out with my friend every single thing I spoken about with my partner was gone…i started to pack up to come home looking at my phone to missed calls from my partner. Calls him back and he was like where are you? He had been sitting home for 2 hours waiting on me and guess what…I came home without the dinner stuff becuase I’d forgotten all about it and I actually ended up eating while I was out not even thinking about dinner at home. So at this point it’s causing arguments because I’m looking like I’m extremely selfish and not being considerate of him.

then at the end of last week my partner kept making suggestions I should do this and that, and I got so overwhelmed because I just wanted to stay home where I couldn’t forget things. It’s really affecting me day to day and my relationship with my partner.

If I had adhd would that not have been picked up on as I was a kid?

Just Had a look at the symptoms and I definitely seem to fit a lot of the traits & one thing that also stands out as well is dangerous driving. I want to say I never do this with my son in the car but when I drive alone I get such a thrill from driving fast. I think I’m some kind of track racer. I always feel so guilty when I get home but I can’t seem to help myself.

Just want to post some positives today though cos I don’t want to get trapped in the negatives.

Just done a great work out session
having high energy
I have had more talking about my future business idea I’ve been thinking of for a few years .
easier to get out of bed
sleep hasn’t been the worst
I watch less tv

yeah the motivation to engage in life is one of the biggest issues with weed, right?

Even on day 2 I can feel the uptick in motivation and clarity of thought.

good work!!

this post was from 2018 I think but same rules still apply yes! I can tell that when I’m not smoking my motivation for success is a lot more intense. I’m no longer working in this job anymore but i have new ideas for future business plan when the time is right. I’m a good talker of things but it would be nice to one day have these plans materialise

Two major symptoms of ADHD: Cannabis use disorder and many lofty goals, dreams and ambitions that fail to materialize.

I know that untreated / unmanaged ADHD is an issue for me. I may need to go down a medication route as an experiment because this has been a pattern all my life. I've been reading a lot lately about the realities of being an adult living with untreated or undiagnosed ADHD and it's really remarkable how accurately I see my own life depicted.

Might be worth looking at that as a possible point of personal enquiry for you, too.