Gearing up for a new quit
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2017
Posts: 139
hi all
doing pretty well with it. not 100% but huge progress.
In the last 12 days I have had ten of them totally sober and two of them with one hit of pot a day. (one day at the start of the 12 and one day towards the latter part)
sober today and just moving forward the best I can.
doing pretty well with it. not 100% but huge progress.
In the last 12 days I have had ten of them totally sober and two of them with one hit of pot a day. (one day at the start of the 12 and one day towards the latter part)
sober today and just moving forward the best I can.
Not all better, getting better
Join Date: Feb 2002
Location: The Beautiful Inner Banks of NC
Posts: 1,702
Good to hear from you, glad you are doing well!! "Recovery" is a process. It often has its stops and starts. I know I often beat myself up when I "slipped" and used and it became an excuse to give up and keep on going. Needless to say this was not helpful to anyone.
When you want to use, just stop, take a deep breath and think about it. Why do you want to use? Is that reason really valid? If it is because you are feeling anxious or bad, will using really help you in the long run? "Addicts tend to think of everything in very short terms. It may help you feel better right not, but is it worth all the bad feeling of failure and self loathing that you feel afterward?
It is all about developing positive habits. Right now using is a negative habit. It is your go to when things are not going your way, but does it REALLY help? You have to find a way to slow down the process and think things through. You don't have to slow it down that long, just long enough to not be impulsive.
Hang in there. Don't beat yourself up too much, but also don't let yourself completely off the hook. Your actions do have consequences, it's a good idea to familiarize yourself with what they are. Keep it up!! Take care.
When you want to use, just stop, take a deep breath and think about it. Why do you want to use? Is that reason really valid? If it is because you are feeling anxious or bad, will using really help you in the long run? "Addicts tend to think of everything in very short terms. It may help you feel better right not, but is it worth all the bad feeling of failure and self loathing that you feel afterward?
It is all about developing positive habits. Right now using is a negative habit. It is your go to when things are not going your way, but does it REALLY help? You have to find a way to slow down the process and think things through. You don't have to slow it down that long, just long enough to not be impulsive.
Hang in there. Don't beat yourself up too much, but also don't let yourself completely off the hook. Your actions do have consequences, it's a good idea to familiarize yourself with what they are. Keep it up!! Take care.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2017
Posts: 139
Gah, Day 1.
Man this is a rough dragon to beat!
Been trying for decades to walk away from this insidious addiction.
Know I need to in order to live my best version of myself and actualize better things in my life.
so hard to quit a thirty + year daily addiction.
Man this is a rough dragon to beat!
Been trying for decades to walk away from this insidious addiction.
Know I need to in order to live my best version of myself and actualize better things in my life.
so hard to quit a thirty + year daily addiction.
Not all better, getting better
Join Date: Feb 2002
Location: The Beautiful Inner Banks of NC
Posts: 1,702
I'm not sure if you are in the unfortunate situation of living with or work with someone who smokes, I can't imagine how hard that would be. If not, the first step should be to get rid of all your bud, pipes, papers, etc. Don't toss the in the kitchen trash, too easy to dig out...been there!!
Secondly make the decision that you are not going to get anymore. I know, easier said than done, but delete those numbers, and do it thoroughly. Getting pot takes some degree of effort, there are many chances to change your mind before you actually get it.
Thirdly, look into some kind of outpatient program. There is a good chance you insurance will at least cover part of it. Like you I had a problem with people not taking me and my addiction seriously, but you know what F them!! My ex-wife is the director of a large substance abuse program and she tells me that the number of clients seeking help for marijuana addiction has increased greatly in recent years. If you should run into that councilor with that kind of attitude, speak to their supervisor. You have a problem and they are not doing their job.
As far as other clients go, well that is probably on of those things you will have to learn to deal with. It is just ignorance on their part. Just don't associate with those people if possible.
I am going through some similar issues myself. I was clean for almost 3 months and let an emotional situation set me off. I have used all of the excuses I listed above (and to be truthful probably still use some of them). Just remember that just because you used today, that has absolutely no impact on if you use today. It is a decision you make whether or not to use. I know I am very guilty of doing this, especially with pot. It just doesn't seem right to flush that excellent bud down the toilet, except THAT IT DOES!!
Keep at it, the cravings do get better, but also be vigilant, as they can sneak up on you when you least expect it. Glad you are making progress!! Keep it up!! Take care
Secondly make the decision that you are not going to get anymore. I know, easier said than done, but delete those numbers, and do it thoroughly. Getting pot takes some degree of effort, there are many chances to change your mind before you actually get it.
Thirdly, look into some kind of outpatient program. There is a good chance you insurance will at least cover part of it. Like you I had a problem with people not taking me and my addiction seriously, but you know what F them!! My ex-wife is the director of a large substance abuse program and she tells me that the number of clients seeking help for marijuana addiction has increased greatly in recent years. If you should run into that councilor with that kind of attitude, speak to their supervisor. You have a problem and they are not doing their job.
As far as other clients go, well that is probably on of those things you will have to learn to deal with. It is just ignorance on their part. Just don't associate with those people if possible.
I am going through some similar issues myself. I was clean for almost 3 months and let an emotional situation set me off. I have used all of the excuses I listed above (and to be truthful probably still use some of them). Just remember that just because you used today, that has absolutely no impact on if you use today. It is a decision you make whether or not to use. I know I am very guilty of doing this, especially with pot. It just doesn't seem right to flush that excellent bud down the toilet, except THAT IT DOES!!
Keep at it, the cravings do get better, but also be vigilant, as they can sneak up on you when you least expect it. Glad you are making progress!! Keep it up!! Take care
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2017
Posts: 139
day 6 or so. basically I am only thinking of pot a little- no major withdrawals etc but in the back of my mind every day I feel I want to smoke. life feels cleaner and easier sober for sure- and the addict voice deceives me into thinking smoking pot will enhance rather than detract from my life. I know it will put me back into overwhelm if smoke. Yet, I cannot feel a deep commitment to it. I keep feeing more like I am taking a break.
Not all better, getting better
Join Date: Feb 2002
Location: The Beautiful Inner Banks of NC
Posts: 1,702
I understand what you are talking about more than I am willing to share about at this moment. You might try checking out some of the threads over on the Secular forum. There are a lot of different approaches there that can help you understand your relationship to pot and how you can change it. It is mostly where I hang out. A bunch of smart and helpful folks over there. Check it out.
Just one other thing that I have experienced, counting days does not work. For me. You say that part of you just feels like you are taking a break. Is that maybe because you are counting towards the time that you feel like you can smoke again? By making a real commitment of abstinence there is no need to count because it is something you are not going to do anymore. Just a thought.
Take care.
Just one other thing that I have experienced, counting days does not work. For me. You say that part of you just feels like you are taking a break. Is that maybe because you are counting towards the time that you feel like you can smoke again? By making a real commitment of abstinence there is no need to count because it is something you are not going to do anymore. Just a thought.
Take care.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2011
Posts: 117
Hello Windytown. I remember you from ages ago. I am sorry to hear you are still battling the addiction. I don't post much and rarely read here. I have forgotton the days I used to smoke. I cannot remember how many days not smoking it has been for me anymore. I can't even remember the year I quit! 2012? Or earlier?
My life still has some dramas and some days are worse than others. At least with the weed out of the picture I am capable of feeling the full spectrum of what life throws up, good and bad.
Think of the achievement you will feel after all this effort if you finally lay this to rest. I really hope you can get a few months up and maybe a year. You won't think of it the way you do at the moment. Things change. It is a marathon for a while but then you just keep running effortlessly. It will get easier you know. WAY EASIER.
Good luck and keep going!
EDIT: ...ok. I think it must have been 2008 or 2009 I quit. That would be about 10 years. Hmm... maybe it will all balance out? I smoked 100 bongs a day for a quarter of a Century. I might live another 15 years.... I can swim underwater in the big pool now with my eyes open!
My life still has some dramas and some days are worse than others. At least with the weed out of the picture I am capable of feeling the full spectrum of what life throws up, good and bad.
Think of the achievement you will feel after all this effort if you finally lay this to rest. I really hope you can get a few months up and maybe a year. You won't think of it the way you do at the moment. Things change. It is a marathon for a while but then you just keep running effortlessly. It will get easier you know. WAY EASIER.
Good luck and keep going!
EDIT: ...ok. I think it must have been 2008 or 2009 I quit. That would be about 10 years. Hmm... maybe it will all balance out? I smoked 100 bongs a day for a quarter of a Century. I might live another 15 years.... I can swim underwater in the big pool now with my eyes open!
Last edited by simian66; 05-06-2018 at 07:02 PM. Reason: lost track of time...
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Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Baltimore, MD
Posts: 232
[QUOTE=tyler;6855934] When I went to my first rehab and told my councilor that marijuana was my DOC his response was "that's all?"
This jumps out at me. This really exemplifies the public perception that 'pot isn't that bad', and it's also shows that we're not mentally or medically equipped to deal with cannabis addiction on any level.
And yet there is an overwhelming rush to legalize it's recreational use across the nation.
Racingthoughts said it best on this post: 'Addiction is the disease, and the drug of choice is a mere technicality.'
Thank you for sharing everyone. I pray you well in your recovery...
This jumps out at me. This really exemplifies the public perception that 'pot isn't that bad', and it's also shows that we're not mentally or medically equipped to deal with cannabis addiction on any level.
And yet there is an overwhelming rush to legalize it's recreational use across the nation.
Racingthoughts said it best on this post: 'Addiction is the disease, and the drug of choice is a mere technicality.'
Thank you for sharing everyone. I pray you well in your recovery...
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