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My Mother died

Old 02-17-2005, 02:30 AM
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Thankyou all again.

I am leaving in a moment and will be gone for 48hrs. When I come back the funeral will be done, etc.

I guess I am quite frightened of being vulnerable publicly. I used to physically fight everyone, but this is one I can't fight my way out of.

Sober is the only decent way. Sober I can go through this with respect for my Father and brother and for the situation. I don't underestimate the value of having a clean shirt and flowers and not being drunk. Sober, I can take the life lesson, though as I suspect it's going to be something to do with vulnerability I'm going to choke on it a little first.

In my early days I struggled to find reasons, other than necessity, to stay sober. Now I'd be hard pushed to find a reason not to be.

:amsmiling
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Old 02-17-2005, 03:43 AM
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You will be in my thoughts and prayers today, Andy.

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Old 02-17-2005, 08:04 AM
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I am so sorry for you loss.
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Old 02-17-2005, 01:37 PM
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Andy,

I am sorry for your loss. You are in my thoughts
and prayers today.
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Old 02-17-2005, 02:20 PM
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Andy,

My thoughts and prayers are with you.

Hugs,
MG
 
Old 02-17-2005, 02:40 PM
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Andy,

I'm very sorry about your mom. You are in my thoughts, and I'm glad to hear you are strong in your convictions to stay sober.

Julia
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Old 02-17-2005, 03:46 PM
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Andy,
I pray for continued strength for you and your family.
I am so sorry.
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Old 02-17-2005, 06:57 PM
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Praying For You And Your Family.
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Old 02-18-2005, 11:36 AM
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Andy I'm sorry also for such a loss. Being vulnerable in public means your human, nothing wrong with showing your feelings, and most times it's best to get it out, let it go.

Love and understanding.....Denise
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Old 02-19-2005, 06:03 AM
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I appreciate all your thoughts and comments.

It's job done now.

Andy F
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Old 02-19-2005, 07:31 AM
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May her spirit live in your heart forever, Andy.

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Old 03-03-2005, 09:02 AM
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Andy, I am very sorry for your lose. These first few weeks can be particularly difficult. It sounds very cliché but the biggest problem with death is that it is the end. That is seldom easy but you are right, there are people here to do understand and care and that helps. I hope you are doing something nice to take care of you.
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Old 03-04-2005, 03:20 PM
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Originally Posted by Tapery
It sounds very cliché but the biggest problem with death is that it is the end.

Hi Tapery

I was dry eyed through my Mother's funeral. That's not to say I haven't been upset before and since.

I know that it hasn't really sunk in that I will never see my Mother again. Today, I got up and looked out the window and it had been snowing overnight. It was quite a picture and I realised my mum would never see the snow again.

I am not afraid of the process. It will have to be what it will be and in it's own time. It is just a part of my life now. It is my father I am sorry for. 47 years in bed at night with the same woman he adored and suddenly he's on his own at night aged 68. It has to be a shock. Well I'm not a fortune teller so I'm not going to predict the future.

Thanks for everyones post. I don't believe in posting for self-pity, but I have always believed in sharing the good and the bad to reflect life as it is.
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Old 03-04-2005, 03:24 PM
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I have always enjoyed reading your posts.My prayers go out to you and your family.
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Old 03-04-2005, 03:24 PM
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Hey Andy, it will be tough for your Dad for a while.
My parents were married 54 years when my Dad passed.
It's taken my Mom a long time to deal with life on her own.
Small things, like just writing her name on Christmas cards instead of both of their names would really get to her.
Time helps, as does love and support from the family.
Sending some positive energy out for you and your Dad.
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Old 03-04-2005, 04:19 PM
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Originally Posted by Andy F
Hi Tapery

Today, I got up and looked out the window and it had been snowing overnight. It was quite a picture and I realised my mum would never see the snow again.

Andy,

When my mother died it was the first new blouse I bought that she would never see. Today for the first time that I can ever remember she visited me in a daydream (I would never let myself go there before) and we talked about where I am in my life right now and about her. I am not feeling as certain about “ends” at the moment.

It is going to be difficult for your father. My thoughts and prayers are with him and with you. Be gentle with yourself.
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Old 03-04-2005, 09:40 PM
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(((Andy)))
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