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Old 07-01-2017, 05:10 AM   #161 (permalink)
It means 'star', as in the sky
 
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least, I'm sorry to hear you had to go through this, too! I had to wear mine for 3 days. I was so happy to rip that thing off on Friday morning and finally wash my hair!! Best shower, ever

Ann Thank you so much for the lovely chair and flowers! What a charming addition to this hallway Happy Birthday to Canada!!

Maudcat, in the real world, I have a screened-in back porch that needs attention. I must add that to my work list!!
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Old 07-01-2017, 05:52 AM   #162 (permalink)
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A screened in porch! How cool.
I would love one, as the mosquitoes are fierce this year! Must have been the rainy spring.
I have thought about adding a screen structure when we replace the deck, which has definitely seen better days.
But..don't want to spend much more money on the house as, for a variety of reasons, I don't think I will get the money back, all or in part, when I sell.
My house is the smallest one on the street, and is located across from a transitional care facility.
This doesn't bother me, obviously.
But the bank appraiser thought it was a negative.
Anyway, more info than you needed.
good luck with the porch.
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Old 07-02-2017, 11:35 AM   #163 (permalink)
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If you love your house, Maudcat, that is all that matters!

The porch is pretty uninhabitable right now. Probably birds nesting in it and it needs a good cleaning...I still have much to do since my husband passed...
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Old 07-02-2017, 12:37 PM   #164 (permalink)
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If I may make a recommendation, i would suggest doing things in chunks. Break the task down so that it is managable, then do one chunk at a time.
Example: sweep the screen house floor. Don't worry about washing the furniture, or replacing it., or fixing any torn screening. Just do that one thing.
So many times we get overwhelmed by the enormousness of the projects before us, and that prevents progress.
Also, I have a capable and talented handy guy that I call on for things that I can't do myself. He has done jobs for us and for my mother, who is 92 and lives in a barn of a house.
He is a godsend.
I wish you someone just like him.
Good luck to you. I always look forward to your posts. You live up to your name.
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Old 07-02-2017, 01:57 PM   #165 (permalink)
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Seren, if I was your neighbour, I would help you with that porch. I love love love porches and would be delighted to help.

I like the idea of breaking it into "doable" pieces; a little bit at a time you can have that porch begging for some new wicker furniture and a lovely table with a pretty cloth and fresh flowers in a vase on top...like this.

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Old 07-02-2017, 03:09 PM   #166 (permalink)
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Awww, thank you Maudcat. Yes, some little thing every day is what I am trying to do. At the moment, I am still working through all the papers and books that I brought home from Mr. Seren's office and all of my MIL belongings that were left here that need to go to my BIL and two SILs.

Ann! I would love a pretty porch like that I would love to have someplace to go and have my morning coffee and even my breakfast, to have my stepdaughter and grands over, to have friends and neighbors over. You have seen pics of my backyard...that is the view from this porch.
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Old 07-03-2017, 06:41 PM   #167 (permalink)
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Yes, you have a magnificent view. How lovely it would be to sit on your porch with your coffee and just listen to the birds. Maybe a hummingbird feeder at one end would bring you joy when the little birds attended.

I think you are doing very well, so much of what you are handling right now has a lot of emotion attached to it and that makes it harder to do...and also to "finish". Take your time, Seren, it will all come together eventually, at your own pace.
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Old 08-09-2017, 07:57 PM   #168 (permalink)
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((seren))
Just checking in - been trying to spend a little more time on SR - need the added peace & serenity.
You are often in my thoughts & prayers.
Big pink hugs.
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Old 09-02-2017, 02:09 AM   #169 (permalink)
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So, it is a 3-day weekend here in the US. I hope to get quite a bit of work done on the house and yard this weekend, and maybe I will feel a bit more settled afterward.

I'm in one of those awkward places in my grief, again.

Not really going back, not moving forward, just a little more sitting in the hallway, I suppose.

I wonder sometimes if I will be alone for the rest of my life and what that will be like. I sometimes feel as though I do *not* want to be alone for the rest of my life, but I also can't imagine trusting someone the same way I trusted my husband, cared for him, felt connected to him. I don't know...I'm not pushing any feeling of mine one way or another. And no, it's not pleasant to feel as though I am completely insane. Meh...

I wonder if there will come a time when I don't cry over his loss. When a song comes on the radio, when I think about how he is not here enjoying his grandchildren. When I won't replay that day over and over in my head.

And...I have, it seems, pushed my friend away. When e-mails and phone calls went unanswered, I knew better than to continue. So I stopped attempting contact altogether a couple of months ago.

On the 'some good news' front, I have an opportunity to travel to Rome in 2019. Mr. Seren and I had always wanted to travel once he retired and, of course, never had the chance. I hope I can save up for this trip! It may be the only opportunity I have to go.

Well, thank you for listening!!
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Old 09-02-2017, 02:10 AM   #170 (permalink)
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Old 09-02-2017, 03:52 AM   #171 (permalink)
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I don't know what the future holds Seren but I wish the best for you - may it be something wonderful - wonderful perhaps in a different way to the past, but no less wonderful

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Old 09-02-2017, 06:12 AM   #172 (permalink)
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Seren!
Good to hear from you.
So you are unsettled. You are grieving. Totally get that. Time will heal.
What are you doing in the yard.?
How is the screened in porch progressing?
I did a lot of planting this summer, but my yard is still very much a work in progress.
The gardener's thread on this site is pretty quiet just now, but it's a great thread with lots of good people chiming in.
Check it out sometime.
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Old 09-02-2017, 08:20 AM   #173 (permalink)
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I think Rome sounds like a wonderful trip and it's a great goal to put away money for. I hope you have a peaceful weekend Seren.
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Old 09-02-2017, 10:35 AM   #174 (permalink)
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Thank you, PJ! Thank you, Dee, for your well wishes. You know I always wish the same for you

Maudcat, I wish I could report that my porch is in magnificent shape. Sadly, I have been doing well to just mow the back yard recently. I hope to do more to clean up the yard and maybe even tackle the porch at some point this weekend! I have had some ongoing health issues that have kept me from really getting as many things done as I would like. Not the least of which is that I am suffering from some pretty sever iron-deficient anemia. (aka, I am exhausted all the time.) Thank you for the heads-up on the gardening thread. I am not much of a green thumb, but it is nice to hear about and see what others do
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Old 09-02-2017, 11:12 AM   #175 (permalink)
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it's more the people I enjoy than the gardening itself, though I have learned a good bit from the posters.
One of my neighbors in our old neighborhood had an iron deficiency.
Not fun.
Hang in there.
Always good to hear from you.
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Old 09-02-2017, 12:45 PM   #176 (permalink)
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Seren, although is may feel like you are "stuck" in your grief, your words here show how very far you have come. Time takes time, mostly that stinks but it remains the way it is.

Planning a trip to Rome should be fun. You can look ahead at historical places you want to visit and even some small special shops or restaurants that you may want to make note of.

I also have iron deficiency anemia and take two supplements a day to keep my levels normal. Maybe your doctor can help you with this...or perhaps he/she already has.

Mine was caused by taking a pill each day to protect my stomach from Ibuprofen (which I take for arthritis). The pill was blocking the ability of my stomach to absorb iron. I no longer take Ibuprofen (I lost 15 pounds and that helped the arthritis) and stopped taking the pill and once I get stable at healthy hemoglobin rates again, I can stop the supplement. This is probably not your case but worth mentioning because it took me a while to figure out what was causing my deficiency.

On a happier note...once you get that porch in order, I imagine you will find a lot of peace there, overlooking your magnificent yard.

Sending big hugs as always, we all care about you and are glad you share here and hopefully lighten your load just a little.
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Old 09-02-2017, 04:00 PM   #177 (permalink)
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I am on prescription iron supplements at the moment. The first ones prescribed I could not tolerate. These new ones seem to be doing better. We'll see how I feel in a few weeks! I don't take any pain meds except every now and then for a sinus headache. Since I am a Type I diabetic (autoimmune disease), who knows whether absorption of nutrients from food is a problem as well. I am hypothyroid, anemic, low vitamin D...all conspiring to make me very, very tired. I am nothing if not better living through chemistry

Fortunately, the holter monitor did not show any heart problems but did suggest I have sleep apnea. So, my doctor ordered an at home sleep study. I hope to have those results next week. Did I mention that I am very tired

Thank you, Ann, Maudcat, Astro, Dee, PJ...I am most grateful for the listening ears you provide
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Old 09-07-2017, 10:40 AM   #178 (permalink)
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Welp, the sleep study showed I have obstructive apnea. Apparently I struggle to breathe or stop altogether an average of 15 times per hour. Ugh...so Auto CPAP machine has been ordered by my sleep medicine doctor.

We are also predicted to be hit by Irma. All the preparations remind me of the historic flood that happened just weeks before Mr. Seren died. Not a comfortable time...but I am hoping to be useful in the response to this storm. That is enough.
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Old 09-07-2017, 04:37 PM   #179 (permalink)
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Stay safe Seren

D
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Old 09-07-2017, 06:49 PM   #180 (permalink)
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Well no wonder you are tired. I get tired if I have to get up more than once in the night to use the bathroom...15 times an hour would do anyone in. I hope that now that they know this, they can do something about it.

I was thinking of you today, I wondered if you may be in the path of the storm...which seems to be a very wide path from what I hear. Please keep yourself safe and dry. I will keep you in my prayers, and if you need to come north, you know where I live.
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