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5YearsGone

Old 08-29-2015, 05:54 AM
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5YearsGone

I'm coming up to my mothers 6th year passing from terminal cancer it was at this time I was caring for her for the 3 months leading up to her death in november

I was 27 my mum was my best friend and I miss her every single day I miss us laughing our heads off together

I'm realising I'm more & more like my mum every year I have her laugh her sense of humor her kindness her love of cooking her love of animals

I know it doesn't end with their passing I know that in my heart & soul

were also coming up for Mrs sw's godmother 1st year passing just before christmas like my mum

Wherever you are mum know I didn't deserve an angel as a mother I love you in my bones heart soul & spirit you were the best mum on earth

Love you spk soon xxxxxxxxxxx
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Old 08-29-2015, 06:17 AM
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I could see peace instead of this
 
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Aww, I lost my mom to cancer too, just over 3 years ago. I'm grateful that I spent her last month with her in a hospital and then the hospice. It was that experience that convinced me that our loved ones aren't really "gone", and that comforts me a lot. I wouldn't say we were best friends like you and your mom were, but I still loved her and miss her.
You were both fortunate to have such a close and loving relationship; that is something very special. I wish you peace for your heart.
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Old 08-29-2015, 08:37 AM
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Very sorry for both your losses, thoughts are with you all!!
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Old 08-29-2015, 09:39 AM
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My heart goes out to you SW . The loss of a parent is hard to adjust to . You assume they will always be their, Both of mine have passed . I'll see them in Heaven when it's my turn .
Till then I at least have some Good memories to think about
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Old 08-29-2015, 10:01 AM
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((((((Dear Wonderful SW)))))
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Old 08-29-2015, 04:45 PM
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That was a lovely post SW

D
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Old 08-29-2015, 04:54 PM
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So sorry for the loss of your mum. Even 15 years later, I still miss mine so very much. It gets easier to get on with life over time, but we always have them in our hearts.
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Old 08-29-2015, 05:37 PM
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I an very sorry for your loss. The following has helped me through so hard times. I pray that it may help you as well. I like it because it doesn't sugar coat the loss.

He Was Grieving Over The Death Of His Best Friend, Until An Old Man Told Him THIS. Mind Blown.
POSTED 3 WKS 69

"My friend just died. I don't know what to do."

The rest of the post has been deleted, only the title remains. However, the helpful responses live on, and one of them was absolutely incredible. The reply by this self-titled "old guy" might just change the way you approach life and death.

I'm old. What that means is that I've survived (so far) and a lot of people I've known and loved did not.

I've lost friends, best friends, acquaintances, co-workers, grandparents, mom, relatives, teachers, mentors, students, neighbors, and a host of other folks. I have no children, and I can't imagine the pain it must be to lose a child. But here's my two cents...

I wish I could say you get used to people dying. But I never did. I don't want to. It tears a hole through me whenever somebody I love dies, no matter the circumstances. But I don't want it to "not matter". I don't want it to be something that just passes. My scars are a testament to the love and the relationship that I had for and with that person. And if the scar is deep, so was the love. So be it.

Scars are a testament to life. Scars are a testament that I can love deeply and live deeply and be cut, or even gouged, and that I can heal and continue to live and continue to love. And the scar tissue is stronger than the original flesh ever was. Scars are a testament to life. Scars are only ugly to people who can't see.

As for grief, you'll find it comes in waves. When the ship is first wrecked, you're drowning, with wreckage all around you. Everything floating around you reminds you of the beauty and the magnificence of the ship that was, and is no more. And all you can do is float. You find some piece of the wreckage and you hang on for a while. Maybe it's some physical thing. Maybe it's a happy memory or a photograph. Maybe it's a person who is also floating. For a while, all you can do is float. Stay alive.

In the beginning, the waves are 100 feet tall and crash over you without mercy. They come 10 seconds apart and don't even give you time to catch your breath. All you can do is hang on and float. After a while, maybe weeks, maybe months, you'll find the waves are still 100 feet tall, but they come further apart. When they come, they still crash all over you and wipe you out. But in between, you can breathe, you can function. You never know what's going to trigger the grief. It might be a song, a picture, a street intersection, the smell of a cup of coffee. It can be just about anything...and the wave comes crashing. But in between waves, there is life.

Somewhere down the line, and it's different for everybody, you find that the waves are only 80 feet tall. Or 50 feet tall. And while they still come, they come further apart. You can see them coming. An anniversary, a birthday, or Christmas, or landing at O'Hare. You can see it coming, for the most part, and prepare yourself. And when it washes over you, you know that somehow you will, again, come out the other side. Soaking wet, sputtering, still hanging on to some tiny piece of the wreckage, but you'll come out.

Take it from an old guy. The waves never stop coming, and somehow you don't really want them to. But you learn that you'll survive them. And other waves will come. And you'll survive them too.

If you're lucky, you'll have lots of scars from lots of loves. And lots of shipwrecks.
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Old 08-29-2015, 06:26 PM
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^^^^ Wow - powerful.
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Old 08-29-2015, 06:49 PM
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MIR - That was simply fabulous. Thank you.

Wolfie - I'm praying for you to be comforted. I'm sorry for the pain you're feeling. It's a terrible price we pay for love - but it's worth it.
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Old 08-29-2015, 07:07 PM
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(((Soberwolf))).
I am glad that you shared that sort of love with your Mom. It makes it harder to lose such a mom, but thats how it is when we love so much.

MIR, that was a powerful post.

hugs
chic
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Old 08-29-2015, 07:27 PM
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Wolfie, it isn't easy, learning to live without our loved ones who have passed away, you had a special bond with your mum and she will live on, in your heart, in your soul. thinking of you and Mrs Wolfie at this difficult time.

Mir , lovely words, very poignant.
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Old 08-30-2015, 06:34 AM
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Thank you everyone
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Old 08-30-2015, 02:35 PM
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Keeping you in my thoughts & prayers soberwolf
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Old 08-30-2015, 06:49 PM
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((Soberwolf)) Sending you my prayers and love.
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Old 08-31-2015, 08:48 AM
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Thank you
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Old 11-15-2015, 08:45 AM
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Been thinking about my mum a lot lately going to try to meet up with my family in 8 days (the 6 year passing date)

I still go & lay flowers its just harder in these months
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Old 11-15-2015, 04:04 PM
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Soberwolf keeping you in my prayers
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Old 11-15-2015, 05:01 PM
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Thanks for sharing SoberWolf - my condolences on this sad anniversary. Some wise words here, hope you will find some comfort. We got your back here at SR. Take care man.
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Old 11-15-2015, 05:13 PM
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learning to live
 
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((((Wolfie))))
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