October 10 2017
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2013
Posts: 46
October 10 2017
I wanted to post today to say how grateful I am to be sober today. My alcoholism led to me losing my marriage and the respect of my kids.
In 2013 is when I knew my drinking was at an abnormal level. I tried to quit on my own many times since then and even had some modest success. I had 7 months ending in March 2016, 5 months ended in June 2017, and a bunch of numbers anywhere under those two long stretches. It never lasted. Always went back out. To that same pitiful and incomprehensible demoralization.
So about a week ago I made it past my longest sober stretch of my drinking career. 7 months and 1 day.
I decided all by myself that it would be ok to go back to the city where my ex wife and kids live to visit my kids who are 24 yo and 19 yo. Last Friday night I get the great idea to text the ex wife about how well I am doing. Long story short I didn't get the response I was looking for and there I was wanting to drink 3 hrs drive away from my new city.
I'll just go ahead and say that it was pretty scary. I made it back safe and SOBER!
Damn.... I didn't go down there with any intention of tryin to contact the ex wife...... but after I told her some good **** about how well I was doing and not getting a suitable (to me) response I was ready to throw 7 months down the drain and drink just a few to settle down. So grateful to my AA friends who I called. My M. O. is to call them after I am drunk usually.
M y friends talked to me and helped me get through the weekend. I was able to have a nice visit with my kids and then come back sober.
My point is that I went down there with no plan. Just went. I won't go there again without contacting people in AA first and set firm plans to call and meet with them at some point on the next visit. Also I almost need to run every single decision about everything I do while there with my AA people LOL. Right down to where I eat! I'm ok with that. My sobriety means so much to me right now.
I've feel pride and a little foolish thinking that I was fine. I have an emotional nature and when hurt or I don't get my way or my expectations aren't met look the **** out. HAHA I feel like I am stronger for having gone thru that. The way I drink now...... I would probably by in jail.
Grateful today. Thank you
In 2013 is when I knew my drinking was at an abnormal level. I tried to quit on my own many times since then and even had some modest success. I had 7 months ending in March 2016, 5 months ended in June 2017, and a bunch of numbers anywhere under those two long stretches. It never lasted. Always went back out. To that same pitiful and incomprehensible demoralization.
So about a week ago I made it past my longest sober stretch of my drinking career. 7 months and 1 day.
I decided all by myself that it would be ok to go back to the city where my ex wife and kids live to visit my kids who are 24 yo and 19 yo. Last Friday night I get the great idea to text the ex wife about how well I am doing. Long story short I didn't get the response I was looking for and there I was wanting to drink 3 hrs drive away from my new city.
I'll just go ahead and say that it was pretty scary. I made it back safe and SOBER!
Damn.... I didn't go down there with any intention of tryin to contact the ex wife...... but after I told her some good **** about how well I was doing and not getting a suitable (to me) response I was ready to throw 7 months down the drain and drink just a few to settle down. So grateful to my AA friends who I called. My M. O. is to call them after I am drunk usually.
M y friends talked to me and helped me get through the weekend. I was able to have a nice visit with my kids and then come back sober.
My point is that I went down there with no plan. Just went. I won't go there again without contacting people in AA first and set firm plans to call and meet with them at some point on the next visit. Also I almost need to run every single decision about everything I do while there with my AA people LOL. Right down to where I eat! I'm ok with that. My sobriety means so much to me right now.
I've feel pride and a little foolish thinking that I was fine. I have an emotional nature and when hurt or I don't get my way or my expectations aren't met look the **** out. HAHA I feel like I am stronger for having gone thru that. The way I drink now...... I would probably by in jail.
Grateful today. Thank you
Member
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: New York
Posts: 35,731
Great job on 7 months and 1 day.!!
You did a great job in reaching out. Brilliant move under the circumstances. This visit could've turned into a disaster, but you made the right decision. You should be proud of yourself.
Keep up the great work, Lep!
You did a great job in reaching out. Brilliant move under the circumstances. This visit could've turned into a disaster, but you made the right decision. You should be proud of yourself.
Keep up the great work, Lep!
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