Opivotal

Good for you, both!

You'll never regret not giving in. I can't tell you how free, I felt. Alcohol consumed so much of my time and thoughts.

You can do this!

Steadwell

Speaking of borrowing money, the last weekend of my previous bender, I borrowed a saw-buck from an old high-school acquaintance who entered the bar as I was about to head home. I told him that I would "get him back" as soon as my income tax arrived in a couple of weeks and that I would be in touch with him soon. The next day, I messaged him through Facebook and we became FB friends. I messaged him a few days ago that my refund had arrived but that all of it would need to be applied to March rent and to please bear with me because I would be working pretty soon and would square up with him as soon as possible. Yesterday afternoon, his wife messaged me saying that he passed away on February 14th, Valentine's Day, only nine days after I last saw him. I wondered why he wasn't responding to my messages.

Going through images on my phone, I noticed a couple of photos of him from that day (Sunday, Feb. 5th). Apparently, I took them when entering his number to stay in contact. I then came to the stark realization that those photographs were most likely the last of him alive.

Just another reminder of how little time we all actually have to make things right!

Steadwell

Responded to his wife, who was in my class in high-school, and sent along those photos mentioned earlier. She said to not worry about the saw-buck. It was actually a Jackson.

Geez, if ever there was a test of stamina, this is it!

Nevertheless, I still remain in control over J. Barleycorn!

I wrote an open letter here.

Thanks SR!

Opivotal

I'm so sorry for your loss, Steadwell.

Nice of you to pass along the pictures to his wife.

Steadwell

Here it is one month since DDay (Dryout Day) and it is truly miraculous how all of the scrambled pieces in life seem to just fall back together once the root issue (alki-hol) is faced and addressed. I am grateful to see things improving with relations to family and old friends already.

Steadwell

Been dry for about a month and a half and for that I'm extemely grateful, however, the past couple of days have had a case of a "pithy" attitude. Don't know why, perhaps not enough sleep and a lot going on job wise, personally, etc... Yesterday around noon after a morning meeting, I began to get the shakes and the woozy feeling common with a hangover. Went to grab a bite to eat and that helped, but it took a while. It felt like low blood sugar, I'm fairly sure I'm approaching type II diabetes. Need to get checked-up but kind of apprehensive.

For a fleeting moment, I had the passing thought that "a cold beer" would be nice, but I quickly changed the channel in my mind.

Posting here helps!

Steadwell

Finishing up week 2 at the new job, already receiving first pay-check, coming up on 2 months of sobriety - just a few of the reasons to be extremely grateful.

I'm getting my life back!

Opivotal

Congratulations, Steadwell!

Hevyn

That's so wonderful to hear, Steadwell.

SteveAlex

Awesome stuff!!

Steadwell

Today marks 2 months since "D-Day" and now into the 3rd week of a new job. Grateful, grateful, grateful.

Steadwell

Finally got my internet connection after being down for about 2 weeks and am able to visit SR again, which is a vital part of my struggle for continued sobriety. Have to admit that I struggled during the last 2 weekends without being able to get on the site but was able to get to work daily at my new job and able to flush out my system for the most part. Haven't had a drink since the wee hours of Sunday morning and have spent all day drinking tea, water and taking in various soups with crackers.

I need to develop a better defense to ward off these little binges which will inevitably grow back into a full-blown relapse if I don't take full control.

Does anyone have any pointers for putting a plan together? SR helps a lot but I apparently need to do more.

Opivotal

Would you consider an addiction counselor? I hear lots of postive results from members that included therapy in their recovery.

I combined Smart Recovery and AA. I liked the cognitive approach in Smart Recovery. It really comes down to you and what approach works best.

Steadwell

Thanks for your advice Opivotal, the Smart Recovery you mention seems interesting, I'm looking into it further. Also, I have resources I've used in the past, (i.e. therapist, etc...) I just need to get pro-active and get involved in it again.

Steadwell

Finished up the 2nd week at new assignment, and grateful for not having missed a day all month (the job started Monday, May 1st) despite still struggling to achieve total abstinence. This very moment is the critical point for me with the weekend here and paychecks coming in. Bills are paid and right now is the time to put full measures into effect to prevent regressing back to old habits, so any assuring feedback from my SR compadres would be extremely welcome!

Also, absolutely esctatic to see the new chat feature put in place, a tool I rely on heavily!