Lulupalooza's gratitude list!
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Join Date: Dec 2013
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Today I'm grateful for my family. I'm even grateful for my inlaws. I really lucked out in that category. My family has always been close. When I moved away from home it was very hard. I suppose that contributed to my drinking. I still miss them quite a bit, but I appreciate the time I get to spend with them.
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Today I'm grateful for the opportunity I had to get an education. Although I had a scholarship, I never had to worry about whether or not I'd be able to go on to college. My parents weren't wealthy, but they were able to support me and my siblings through school. As a result, I am confident that my children will be able to get an education as well if they choose to. My husband and I have been able to get good jobs and we are able to save for our childrens' future. Perhaps some day I'll even be able to go on to get a masters degree.
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I'm grateful that I'll be starting this new year sober. Finally! So many years have gone by. So many resolutions have been made and broken. Now I can start out the year on the right foot. This year I'd like to stay sober the whole year. I'll take it one day at a time, starting tomorrow! 
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I'm grateful for friends. Real ones. The ones that have been with me almost my whole life through thick and thin and long distances. We've definitely had our ups and downs but I think of them like family. I've never had many friends and I've seen a lot of people come and go. I'm grateful for the ones I have.
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I'm grateful my previous manager was so kind to me when I had to quit so abruptly to go to rehab. While I don't think she knew about the alcoholism, she knew something was going on in my life. In fact, she didn't even let me quit. I'm still employed... she kept me part time in case I ever wanted to go back. There are some really cool people in this world.
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Today I'm grateful for my last drink. For whatever reason it was the worst drink I had ever had. I decided I just couldn't stand it anymore. I had obsessed and romanced the hell out of it. So I went to the grocery store, bought some crappy wine coolers, and went to town like I used to. They tasted like crap. I thought I was going to barf. I didn't feel relaxed, I felt tired. Then I ran out. I hardly felt buzzed, but I was certainly buzzed enough. You'd think 6 drinks would do the trick, but it hardly touched me. My tolerance is high. How frustrating and disappointing. Then I woke up that night and I felt horribly anxious... just like I used to. I felt horrible. I felt scared. I felt that awful emptiness I used to have in my alcoholism. The next day I felt like crap. I had a nagging headache and I was parched. But it was also a good day because I couldn't wait to be done with it forever. I thought "I never ever want to go back to this". I haven't forgotten that day and it has kept me sober for 7 months now.
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