SaraMichelle

Had one of those Horrible using dreams last night again. It was so real in my dream that I was actually telling myself, freaking out in my dream, that this wasnt a dream and i had really relapsed this time. After i woke up it took me a while to convince myself that I was still clean and sober....I am SO greatful that I am still clean, going on four months strong! I am so greatful this burden has been lifted!

doggonecarl

There are those that say using or drinking dreams don't mean anything, and in themselves, they probably don't. But our reaction to them, in your case horror that you might have relapsed, is an indicator (I think) of where we are in our recovery.

Your recovery sounds strong.

SaraMichelle

thanks Carl....my recovery is stonger then it has ever been....and the last times i tried to get clean, after dreams like that i would try to feel the high as much as i couild, when i woke up i would have an semingly uncontroable urge to use...and i would go out and use as soon as i could. this time is so different, i have these dreams every so often still but my reaction and the feeling they give me are completely different.....