OpheliaKatz

It wasn't fixed when you were "helping" so that help wasn't really helpful. God doesn't want you to enable an addict EVEN if there's a child involved. If you are really concerned with the child, can't you call protective services and then walk away knowing you have done your part?

Then change your phone number. Because waiting for something bad to happen is just waiting to wear that fake superman cape again. You know you can't fly. It's not as if you're God.

I think you should let God do God's job and give the addict (entirely) back to him. I'm not God, but I think God would want you to do more worthy things with your life. You could volunteer at a soup kitchen, foster seeing-eye dogs, start a neighborhood kitchen garden... volunteer at an aged care facility.

1 Corinthians 10:13
No temptation has overtaken you except what is common to mankind. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can endure it.

Matthew 18:8-9
If your hand or your foot causes you to stumble, cut it off and throw it away. It is better for you to enter life maimed or crippled than to have two hands or two feet and be thrown into eternal fire. And if your eye causes you to stumble, gouge it out and throw it away. It is better for you to enter life with one eye than to have two eyes and be thrown into the fire of hell.

I'm not super religious or anything, but I'm confident that the Bible did not say we should rescue people who make bad choices. Forgive yes, rescue no.

HardLessons

Anvilhead

You definitely made me laugh with your above posts. Much needed laugh.

God was watching over master electrician Hank & helper AH while installing that ceiling fan.

Ive been zapped several times doing home projects. Also have major difficulty using electric hedge trimmers without cutting the extension chord.

HardLessons

Puzzled Heart

During my relationship with her I was very isolated concerning the issues with her. The only person I spoke to about all the serious issues was her. Totally isolated.

The very first time I spoke to anyone else about my relationship with her was when I got the nerve up to register & post my story here on this forum. That was June 2017. I had just detached from her and wasn't doing well.

I did see a psychologist for one on one therapy. Her schedule was busy & didn't start that until about end of July 2017. I spent the first three extended visits telling her my entire detailed story. She took notes. At the end of that part she told me that we have to be honest with each other so she could help me. She said she wanted to see proof of my story because it was difficult for her to believe it all. Next visit I brought her all kinds of proof. I also showed her corroborating info online. She was shocked by it all. It was a very complicated mess.

If she ever crossed a certain line with me I would call the police. In all the time ive known her including all the very troubled times between us she never made me feel threatened to the point I would need police involvement. As example in the recent contact if she would have said come get me now or ill burn your house down - I would call the police.

Also your right police involvement from me would be the last thing she would want. I know too much & it would be very bad for her.

I would be impossible for me to tell my story to someone who doesn't understand these situations. They would not be able to comprehend or even handle the details. My psychologist was honestly very taken back by just how crazy & true it all is. She is trained & has a great reputation for addiction & family counseling. She told me after learning about my addict, she would never even consider taking her on as a patient because she has way too many issues going on at the same time.

I hope I answered your questions

HardLessons

trailmix

Going way back to when I first met her. Life wasn't good for her. There was no foundation in place for anything what we might call a normal life. It was bad. It was a very emotional situation for me. As example, they had no food in the house - none. The daughter was young.

I became very emotionally attached to her. I had the means & was going to change & stabilize her life. These intense emotions went on for years.

Her & my relationship was continual highly charged emotions. Over years of time they became deeply embedded in me.

Let go of her - I did that. These residual emotions have not left me. They have subsided. I am no longer brought to tears & driven down to my knees. But emotions are still there.

I don't hate her. Yes she has cause me great pain & aggravation. At times she has treated me like a terminator addict. She is what she is. There are people I hate in this world. I don't want to hate her.

I haven't interacted at all with her for a long time now.

trailmix

It's interesting that your psychologist made you provide evidence. I never doubted your story from the first time I read it.

In fact as terrible as it is, it's not all that shocking.

I know for every incident you have mentioned there are probably 10 more we haven't heard.

HardLessons

Hi Ophelia hope you are doing well

The various authorities are constantly involved with her life. Its been a life filled with police, prosecutors, public defenders, lawyers, courts, judges, prisons, probation officers etc etc. It goes on & on never ending. For both her & the father of the daughter. They are always caught up in the "system". CPS has been to their house & they do nothing.

I have walked away knowing I tried hard - very hard & did my part. There isn't anything more I can do.

Thank you for the bible verses. Yea though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death I shall fear no evil for thou art with me 23 rd psalm I know it by heart & I find it very comforting Im not super religious either

I cant change my phone number. I have had it for many years & is extremely import to my work.

I have left her in God's hands.

HardLessons

Trailmix

I left out some major parts of my story. Things concerning her. Things I cant talk about in public. Things which I went along with for years but today are so painful I could not take open discussion, judgement, or hearing opinions. I have no strength to discuss it.

My posted (told) story for sure isn't good. The untold parts just make it worse much worse in my opinion. Know it all is shocking. How bad does my story here on SR have to be to be considered bad.

When I first went to see the psychologist I was not in a good frame of mind. I went to see her because I knew I needed help. I went from work & sat with her dressed in a suite & tie looking like conservative corporate America business professional. I told her the entire crazy story. I told her everything.

When she told me she wanted to see proof I immediately told her I had no problem with it because I could barely believe it myself. I didn't expect anyone else to believe it. She asked for verification & I showed her. I wanted her to understand its all true & I didn't make any of it up. I wanted her to clearly understand my situation & help me.

Ann

Regardless of what your past included, HardLessons, it doesn't own you and the future is all yours to unfold however you choose. If you don't like the person you have become, forgive that person and work to be a better person, one step and one day at a time.

And one last thing, your sense of humour will see you far. You and Anvilhead had me in stitches.

HardLessons

Thanks Ann wise words & well said. I took note of what you wrote.

She is part of me but she doesn't define me as a person. I am not ashamed of me or her.

Yes there were some funny posts in this thread. It is all very serious topics but it was good to smile & laugh a bit while discussing it.