What is their turning point
 

I sit here today genuinely sad for my addict ex.. I recently wrote this on my last post however I am genuinely curious what makes an addict turn their life around..

i am fortunate/unfortunate enough to have watched some of the best people I know including my uncle brother and cousin all sink to a very deep place fueled my opiates.. however I am fortunate enough to have not lost any of them and although their paths were very different they were all able to get out of those dark places and create lives for themselves

now I know every addict is different, however I can’t help but wonder, why did life turn around for them but it hasn’t for my addict ex yet?

Everyone's bottom is different, none of them can be predicted.

I found that mulling over questions like this was ultimately a distraction from the work I needed to do on myself to make sure I didn't get embroiled in an unhealthy relationship again.

what does it matter, Lynz? his path is HIS path. what will happen will happen when it happens.

some never quit.
some quit sooner. some later.
some can't stay quit.

how does this HELP you? he is still the eye of your hurricane......

You actually answer your own question:

Question: I can’t help but wonder, why did life turn around for them but it hasn’t for my addict ex yet?

Answer: every addict is different

I don't think that's what is at play here really. You know enough about addiction to know that people stop (or not) when THEY get to it and not one minute before.

So unless I am misunderstanding you, I'm not sure why this is even worth wondering about?

So let me ask you, when you ask yourself that question - why hasn't he yet - what is your theory?

Hi Linz,
No one knows why one addict gets it and another one doesn't. Admitting that there is a problem is a huge first step. I've been reading and reading and reading about heroin addiction to understand why my husband is doing the insane hurtful things he's been doing. I'm looking for answers where there really aren't any. Like I'm trying to find in what I read that he really does love me and this relationship he has with this other woman is just an aberration.

ultimately, it doesn't really matter at this point so while I can understand better, it doesn't take away from the fact that I have to protect myself and our children from the insanity. Yesterday my husband was seen by the house, girlfriend in the car, by our daughter. He'd kicked in a basement window and stolen our son's xbox. I've called the police.

I can look forever for reasons why he cheated on me, but it doesn't matter. I can't change that. Nor can I make him want to get sober. Why anyone would choose the life he's living, is baffling but that's not our choice either. I can only heal.

My therapist gave me a good assignment..write a "singles ad" from your guy's perspective, listing his character traits, good and bad. Then ask yourself, if you read that ad, without knowing who the person was, would you answer it? That helped me

Linzey…..I have an idea---why not talk to your uncle, brother and cousin, and ask them what it was, for them, that caused them to turn around...?
Of course, they are not the same as your boyfriend, but it will answer the part of your question that is about them.....
Some things, in life, are just not knowable....

ill speak for myself.
desperation. the pain of getting drunk had exceeded the pain of reality.

so alkies dont have a turning point.

How are you doing Linzey?

whoops- that was supposed to be SOME alkies....