Blogs


Notices

Filing a Motion...need your words of support

Old 02-12-2019, 07:52 AM
  # 1 (permalink)  
Member
Thread Starter
 
Join Date: Jan 2016
Location: Louisville, CO
Posts: 11
Filing a Motion...need your words of support

Why is it so hard to do what I know has to be done? My ex has been spiraling and checked himself into detox yesterday. He was having one of those rare moments of humility (usually it's all insults, accusations, and insanity) and admitted to me his depths of addiction. I was pulled back in to his hurt, talked to his family and concerned friends.

Today I know I have to file for emergency custody. I hate that it feels like a betrayal of trust. This old codependency stuff doesn't die easily.

Just remind me of all the reasons that this is what I HAVE to do. It's about my kids safety. Detox is not Rehab. Rehab does not guarantee sobriety. My kids need stability....let me hear it all!!!

Thanks in advance.
slowlyevolving is offline  
The Following 5 Users Say Thank You to slowlyevolving For This Useful Post:
Ann (02-13-2019), Gm0824 (02-19-2019), HardLessons (02-15-2019), hopeful4 (02-12-2019), trailmix (02-13-2019)
Old 02-12-2019, 08:11 AM
  # 2 (permalink)  
Member
 
Join Date: Nov 2015
Posts: 618
You can be found guilty of failure to protect if you don't, and if so, you could easily lose your kids. Your children are not safe. Neither are you.
Hechosedrugs is offline  
The Following 6 Users Say Thank You to Hechosedrugs For This Useful Post:
Ann (02-13-2019), Gm0824 (02-19-2019), GreenChair (02-16-2019), hopeful4 (02-12-2019), slowlyevolving (02-12-2019), trailmix (02-13-2019)
Old 02-12-2019, 09:01 AM
  # 3 (permalink)  
Member
 
atalose's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2006
Posts: 5,104
Just remind me of all the reasons that this is what I HAVE to do. It's about my kids safety.
That pretty much says it all, your kids safety!

You can also keep asking yourself what's more important, feeding your active codependency or doing what's in the best interest of your kids.
atalose is offline  
The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to atalose For This Useful Post:
Ann (02-13-2019), slowlyevolving (02-12-2019)
Old 02-12-2019, 09:37 AM
  # 4 (permalink)  
Community Greeter
 
hopeful4's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2010
Location: USA
Posts: 13,566
Blog Entries: 10
Amen to that!

The thing is, when you have a child, you put them as #1. No matter who it will hurt, or anything else. Their wellbeing comes before yours, and definitely before his!

Don't question yourself. You are doing the right thing. Using has consequences, and he will never, ever, even think of doing the right thing without feeling those consequences. However, your child will always know when you do the right thing and protect and stay by them!

Sending you a big hug!
hopeful4 is offline  
The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to hopeful4 For This Useful Post:
Ann (02-13-2019), slowlyevolving (02-12-2019), trailmix (02-13-2019)
Old 02-13-2019, 09:36 AM
  # 5 (permalink)  
Ann
Nature Girl
 
Ann's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: By The Lake
Posts: 58,673
Children are the innocent victims of all this and cannot speak for themselves or take care of themselves, so it is up to the parent who is responsible and clean of drugs and alcohol to step up and put the children first....always.

Just remind me of all the reasons that this is what I HAVE to do. It's about my kids safety. Detox is not Rehab. Rehab does not guarantee sobriety. My kids need stability....let me hear it all!!!
But you already know that, the hard part is putting it into practice, no matter how much it hurts.
Ann is offline  
The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to Ann For This Useful Post:
hopeful4 (02-27-2019), trailmix (02-13-2019)
Old 02-15-2019, 07:59 AM
  # 6 (permalink)  
Member
Thread Starter
 
Join Date: Jan 2016
Location: Louisville, CO
Posts: 11
I did it! Yay to me. I hate that his emotional manipulation and anger still impact my ability to clearly do what's right, but I ignored all that and did it anyways. Seeing everything written up in a court order was hugely helpful as it just was painfully clear how bad things had gotten. I feel a huge sense of relief and my ex's reaction (total denial) to the entire situation is just another reminder of why this has to happen. Kids first. Always. Got it.
slowlyevolving is offline  
The Following 6 Users Say Thank You to slowlyevolving For This Useful Post:
atalose (02-15-2019), FeelingGreat (02-17-2019), Gm0824 (02-19-2019), GreenChair (02-16-2019), hopeful4 (02-27-2019), trailmix (03-04-2019)
Old 02-27-2019, 05:50 AM
  # 7 (permalink)  
Member
 
Troubledone's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Minneapolis, MN
Posts: 461
Congratulations slowlyrevovling,

I think you did the right thing!

Stay strong - you are on your way to a better life!
Troubledone is offline  
The Following User Says Thank You to Troubledone For This Useful Post:
trailmix (03-04-2019)

Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off




All times are GMT -7. The time now is 01:53 PM.