Blogs


Notices

Yikes

Old 04-11-2018, 05:06 PM
  # 1 (permalink)  
Engineer, Guitarist, Golfer
Thread Starter
 
zoso77's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Where the mighty arms of Atlas hold the heavens from the Earth
Posts: 3,381
Blog Entries: 5
Yikes

Worked out of the house today. Around lunch time, I made a trip to my local Guitar Center to pick up some strings, and then went to my local Burger King to grab a quick bite before going home.

I walked into BK, took a glance to my left, and saw this woman having a rather animated discussion with someone on her cell phone.

It was my AXGF.

< yes, you read that correctly >

Before she could catch sight of me, I turned around, walked out, got into my car and took off.

It's been quite some time since the old Fight or Flight response has kicked in, but it's still there and it still works.

The last time she attempted to contact me, it was through Google+ shortly after my future wife and I got together. I had blocked her on email and changed my phone number after several attempts at harassing me. I blocked her on Google+, too.

As for what I felt...well, mostly revulsion. I don't know how many other men she was sleeping with when she was sleeping with me. At least two. And when I think back on how often we had sex (addicts LOVE to have sex; it was constant), it made me want to take a shower...

...which I just did...

And I also felt a bit sad. Being with her was one of the few times in my adult life that I ignored my moral compass, and sometimes that weighs on me...although nowhere as frequently as it did back then.

As I said to my wife over email a short time later, one of the good things to come out of that was I took a nearly 4 year break then ended when my wife and I got together. That gave me time to really get my head screwed on right. What I have with my wife is something I would trade for anything.

It's not too often we come face to face with a ghost. Thankfully, I escaped unscathed.
zoso77 is offline  
The Following 12 Users Say Thank You to zoso77 For This Useful Post:
Anaya (04-12-2018), Ann (04-11-2018), atalose (04-11-2018), cece1960 (04-12-2018), dandylion (04-12-2018), Gm0824 (04-12-2018), HardLessons (04-12-2018), Hawkeye13 (04-14-2018), hopeful4 (04-12-2018), OpheliaKatz (04-12-2018), SmallButMighty (04-13-2018), suki44883 (04-11-2018)
Old 04-11-2018, 05:42 PM
  # 2 (permalink)  
Ann
Nature Girl
 
Ann's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: By The Lake
Posts: 59,822
Good for you Zoso! And if you run into her again?

As I said to my wife over email a short time later, one of the good things to come out of that was I took a nearly 4 year break then ended when my wife and I got together. That gave me time to really get my head screwed on right. What I have with my wife is something I wouldn't trade for anything.
Yup, another of those "strangely wrapped gifts" that comes from our adversity and pain, that we only see in hindsight after it appears.

Your life is better today because of what you went through back in the day.

My life today is better because of the pain I walked through with my son, the strangely wrapped gift that I call "life" would not be so good today if it hadn't been so bad back then.

So give your wife a hug from "that Canadian broad" and tell her that even though she is the finest gift that came of your recovery, you will never hear me refer to her as a "trophy" wife, nope, ain't gonna say it., but she sounds like one heck of a nice prize.
Ann is offline  
The Following 8 Users Say Thank You to Ann For This Useful Post:
Anaya (04-12-2018), atalose (04-11-2018), Gm0824 (04-12-2018), HardLessons (04-12-2018), OpheliaKatz (04-12-2018), SmallButMighty (04-13-2018), suki44883 (04-11-2018), zoso77 (04-11-2018)
Old 04-12-2018, 08:02 AM
  # 3 (permalink)  
Community Greeter
 
hopeful4's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2010
Location: USA
Posts: 13,566
Blog Entries: 10
I hate the kick in the stomach feeling. Ugh.

You have handled this journey in an amazing way friend!
hopeful4 is offline  
The Following 4 Users Say Thank You to hopeful4 For This Useful Post:
Ann (04-12-2018), HardLessons (04-12-2018), SmallButMighty (04-13-2018), zoso77 (04-12-2018)

Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off




All times are GMT -7. The time now is 12:47 PM.