deedee

On the books with benefits and everything! This is a minor miracle given he's coming out of 5 years in prison and has another month or so to go in court ordered drug treatment. It's huge for his re-entry into the workforce. A minor hurdle and stressor for D was setting up a checking account since his new employer pays by direct deposit only. His credit history is way less than stellar, but he was able to find a bank that would work with him and set up an account with no problem. That out of the way, he was off to buy work boots, have a physical and drug test. And seemed to have no worries about the results! Another miracle and blessing.

I am so very thankful he was approved for the drug treatment program. It's not perfect and surprisingly they do not seem to practice zero tolerance, at least in the section where he lives. In the past, I would have worried about my son being triggered or tempted. I've let that go and am long past the phase where I thought I could "will" him to get better. Still working on minding my own and keeping my lips zipped. Love and many blessings to all

GreenChair

Congratulations. I am happy for you and for your son.

Ann

That is wonderful news, deedee. It's amazing how something so "normal" as getting a job can feel like a huge accomplishment...which it IS.

My heart is happy for you and your boy is in my prayers.

Hugs

Codimum

How lovely to hear such good news!
I’m so happy for you Deedee. I can feel from your words how much this means to you.... he’s turned a corner and it’s a great start. Onwards and upwards!

deedee

Thank you mamas. Ann, my son actually said he feels like a grown-up again I can't even imagine how it feels to have no control over one's life for 5 years. I can hope it was awful enough that he never ever wants to go back. Onwards and upwards indeed.:

DontRemember

I've met a couple young guys via AA and they were felons looking for work, so I offered them laborer positions with my construction company(after getting to know them a bit).. One is back in jail for something and the other is one of my hardest workers. Doesn't complain(to me) about a thing and seems to really be turning his life around for his fiance and kids. I hope your son seizes the opportunity he's been given. It really is like being a grown-up again. 'Adulting' and all that comes with it kept me in the bottle.

Troubledone

Congratulations! Thank you for sharing your good news. It is posts like this that keep us hoping.

Blessings,

Ilovemysonjj

That is fantastic news! well done to your son for taking charge of his life and for you too!

deedee

Thanks for your post, DontRemember and bless you for taking a chance on those fellas. Thank you TT and Troubledone for your support.

My son isn't a young'un anymore, 39 this year, and we've been doing this dance for years. I can only hope this time is different and he's ready to do whatever it takes to turn his life around. He passed his drug test and physical, starts his job tomorrow (yay!). One step at a time.

Ann

I'm rooting for him, Deedee!!! Cheering him on all the way.

And sending big hugs to you because I know it isn't easy...even on the good days.

Ilovemysonjj

That's awesome!

deedee

Thanks dear Ann, we've walked a lot of miles together thru the years and I'm forever grateful for your support.

D's job is a 2 minute walk from his rehab, so one of the things I've been wondering (but not asking lol) is where he intends to live once he completes the program. We've talked and living here again is not an option -- wouldn't be good for him or for us. He's about an hour and a half away in a major city and has bounced back and forth between going to a halfway/transitional house to renting a room from a friend up here. I personally think the halfway house would be a better option for support, but I don't have a crystal ball and his experience with halfway houses has been mixed. And of course, the big thing is where his head is at and whether or not he wants it bad enough.

Well, he just texted the job is going great and he's going to stay down there for awhile and see how things go, he needs to do this on his own this time. This mama is counting her blessings tonight.

Ann

I am laughing Deedee, because I remember the extensive "fretting" I used to do toward just about every decision my son ever made...."what if?"...."if only"...."he should"..."I hope he doesn't"... you KNOW the process, yes?

My mind would go round and round...for hours and even into my sleep at night. And then my son would call and he had it all worked out and in place shortly after we spoke the first time. Sheesh, you'd think they would save us the fretting....but wait...we are NOT supposed to fret over our adult sons' decisions. Who knew?

I wish we lived near each other, we could meet for cheesecake and let the rest of the world run itself for a while.

deedee

Ahhhh yes, I do remember the fretting and loss of sleep! I also remember obsessing for days about something I did or said to my son, only to find he had no recollection when I finally brought it up.

Happy to say I sleep pretty well these days

Ilovemysonjj

I am the queen of Fretville LOL!
This is still one of my weaknesses not only with my son JJ but also with other things. I fret about work, about not meeting expectations, about when my kids aren't home at 2 in the morning. All of the above! Learning to let go and Let God in all areas takes practice for sure!

JimC60

ILovemysonjj & deedee,

Worrying works! I know this is true, because 99 percent of what I worry about never happens! - Will Rogers.

Keep coming back,

Jim

deedee

Definitely a process!

Ann

Something that helps (but does not cure completely) for me is looking back after I have worried about something that unfolded just fine in spite of my worry...and then assessing just how much time and emotion I wasted on the worry itself. It's an eye opener, I can tell ya.

Jim, I love your Will Roger's quote.