Intimacy no longer there
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Join Date: Jun 2017
Posts: 1
Intimacy no longer there
My husband has been home and sober for about 2 months. He's really doing great, we joined a gym, eating better, sleeping better, took up some new hobbies. Everything sounds great except we are no longer intimate. I feel like he is not attracted to me anymore. I don't know what to do or what to say to him. Just even trying to just touch his arm or cuddle up nextdoor him in bed, he seems so uncomfortable. What can I do to help fix this problem?
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Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: Athens, Georgia
Posts: 962
I'm generally not one for movie analogies, but here goes one, for what it's worth:
In the movie Silver Linings Playbook, Jennifer Lawrence's character says to her date, "you can f___ me if you want, but you'll have to take off that stupid jersey". He doesn't, but they continue along in a relationship, with him having internal crisis issues, and he eventually comes to realize she is really there for him, and cares for him, and he finally embraces the intimacy.
I drank for 40 years, and struggled real hard to get, and stay, sober. The internal fog is very real, and learning to relate in real life issues without the self-medicating anesthesia we relied on for so long, can be daunting, to say the least.
I am very grateful my wife allowed me (us) the opportunity, numerous times, to stumble and struggle thru the process of getting sober, working thru the 12 Step Program I am involved in, and 'develop' into the person I am now. Our intimacy also re-developed, in a much healthier way.
I'm praying your marriage will follow a similar path, to a better marriage.
RDBplus3
In the movie Silver Linings Playbook, Jennifer Lawrence's character says to her date, "you can f___ me if you want, but you'll have to take off that stupid jersey". He doesn't, but they continue along in a relationship, with him having internal crisis issues, and he eventually comes to realize she is really there for him, and cares for him, and he finally embraces the intimacy.
I drank for 40 years, and struggled real hard to get, and stay, sober. The internal fog is very real, and learning to relate in real life issues without the self-medicating anesthesia we relied on for so long, can be daunting, to say the least.
I am very grateful my wife allowed me (us) the opportunity, numerous times, to stumble and struggle thru the process of getting sober, working thru the 12 Step Program I am involved in, and 'develop' into the person I am now. Our intimacy also re-developed, in a much healthier way.
I'm praying your marriage will follow a similar path, to a better marriage.
RDBplus3
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