Ha ha ha, I was cynical enough to make sure I saw the paperwork before he left, so I'm not judging.

Makes me wonder what their real objective is...if they can make it so warm and comfy that the addict is more than happy to come back there once it all hits the fan again in real life...repeat business has the best profit margins.

See? Total cynic. But I was in corporate America long enough to know what goes down in boardrooms and it ain't altruism...

Now that is exactly what I thought when I saw their website the first time. Hey, it's up to him if he gets anything useful out of it.

Exactly. People get well at free no frills Salvation Army rehab. If he wants it, he'll make it work.

lol at you doing the detective work. I totally would do the same thing.

That's what I figure. If he wants it, the particular place is irrelevant. He picked a nice resort regardless though, lol.

Oh yeah, I hate that it's the case, but I can no longer take anything at face value!

Well, from what I have read, there are all kinds of rehab facilities.
Some more touchy feely than others.
Bottom line: it is his recovery, and your choice to be involved or not as part of your recovery.
Do what you think will be best for you, not him. This is your opportunity, away from the drama, to find clarity and, hopefully, serenity in his absence.
You will both be better off for it.

It's quite common for many of the rehabs to resemble a resort atmosphere. Agree or not.

It is good that there is a low patient to counselor ratio. However, I would be clear to anyone who calls you that your main focus right now is YOU. As I said before, their focus is on their patient. That is what they are being paid for. So now is your time to look out for YOU.

Hugs.

hey here's an idea.....how about Miss Dee get herself booked in for a Spa Day? maybe invite a girlfriend, or your daughter even! get yourself totally pampered, exfoliated, salt scrubbed, hot rocked, the whole 9 yards. start the trend of self care NOW!

im no expert, but it reads like ya could set some boundaries with ms/mrs counselor.
a female counselor for a male????
you married a grown man that went to rehab - this isnt a 12 year old at summer camp,is it? just that i could see updates and all that crap for a kid at summer camp. i could see a kid at summer camp wanting a call from mom to hear mom say she loves him.
and a counselorone calling and saying
"She said he gets really emotional when he talks about me and that he wanted someone to call me and tell me that he loves me."
seriously, after my fiance tossed my ass to the curb, i called a day later with a bunch of begging and pleading. she had some gonads. told me straight up," i dont give a ****."
very wise woman, she is.
deelilah, you work on you, take the suggestions people are givin ya here.
then the day will come when this counselor call you will be able to say
not my circus not my monkey
when crap like that is mentioned by a counselor.

I would, but I'm putting money like that aside, lol. I'm doing inexpensive things to take care of me. Small luxuries like a more expensive shower gel that smells great, etc.

Yeah! That's another thing that was weird about it! Like he was a kid and I was his parent or something! He's a grown ass man dealing with a serious problem. This isn't summer camp! Lol, good on your wife. I think he got plenty of "I don't give a ****" from me the week leading up to him leaving for rehab. He got a whole lot of it the night before he left. I told him he'd need his suitcase whether he went to rehab that day or not. He was going somewhere away from me.

They haven't called today. Maybe they'll give that stuff a rest for a while. If they call again with a "message" like that, I'll be better prepared. That one caught me off guard. I kept thinking "okay, he loves me, and?"

i should have said EX fiance. she became that the night of my last drunk without my knowledge. yet.